Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. They belong to Cecily von Zeigesar and The CW.
"Are you sure you don't want to join me?" Blair inquired as she stepped out onto the empty ice rink in her well-worn skates.
"Charlotte and I will happily watch you from our seat right here," Chuck replied as he motioned towards the wooden bench he and his daughter were firmly planted on. Blair had concluded that Chuck's influence in Rockefeller Center was considerably better than Lily's had been as he managed to secure ice time relatively early in the evening.
Charlotte was bundled up tight in her snowsuit. She tried to wave to her mother at Chuck's urging but she was wrapped up like a mummy and barely able to move. She fused a little but settled down as her eyes began to follow her mother as she whirled around the ice. Her eyes widen with intrigue.
Blair stopped after a few minutes and skated back towards the bench she had left Chuck and Charlotte.
"I've never seen her eyes widen this much," Chuck noted as Charlotte tried to squirm as she intended to reach towards her mother. She wanted to fly with her mother. She groaned in frustration at the fact that she couldn't move.
"What do you think, Charlee, do you want to skate with Mommy?" Blair inquired as she reached over the boards and took Charlotte into her arms as if she was reading her daughter's mind.
"Blair, are you sure that's a good idea?" Chuck asked nervously as Charlotte squealed in delight as Blair spun around twice with Charlotte in her arms. "What if you fall?"
"I'll make sure that Charlotte breaks my fall," Blair grinned innocently.
"That's not funny," Chuck scolded her.
"Chuck, I haven't fallen since I was fifteen," Blair rolled her eyes, "And that counts the time when you were throwing my balance off."
"Please be careful," he practically begged her.
"Of course," Blair assured him as she pushed off with Charlotte in her arms.
From Chuck's seat he could hear Charlotte's giggles and squeals of delight as Blair flew across the ice. From the look on Blair's face, she was having just as much fun as their daughter as she twirled and whirled around the ice. Her entire body radiated a happiness that he didn't know was possible. She loved motherhood. She loved spending time with her daughter and doing the things she never remembered her mother doing.
"Maybe we should skip the carriage ride through Central Park," Chuck announced as they returned to the limo after Blair and Charlotte finished their skating. His daughter's eyes began fluttered closed, and she looked tired.
"Charlotte, do you want to ride through Central Park with Mommy and Daddy or do want to go back to the penthouse and sleep?" Blair inquired as she began removing the snowsuit/mummy costume so she wouldn't get overheated on the ride to the park.
"How exactly do you expect her to answer you?" Chuck inquired curiously.
Blair glared at her husband as she looked to Charlotte again. "Sleep at the penthouse?" She paused to allow Charlotte to respond if she wanted to. She just stared at her mother as if she was waiting for the second option. "Central Park with Mommy and Daddy?" Charlotte giggled at that suggestion. Blair looked triumphantly at Chuck as she spoke, "I think we have our answer."
"I think she has her mother's intelligence," Chuck sighed happily as Blair picked her up and kissed her chubby cheeks.
"You are just as intelligent as I am," Blair rolled her eyes at her husband as she tickled Charlotte's stomach, "Don't forget who took over a multi-billion dollar corporation at the age of eighteen and brought it to heights nobody even thought to be possible."
"I also nearly flunked out of Saint Judes," he added, "If it wasn't for the large monetary contribution that Lily made to the school on my behalf, I wouldn't have graduated with our class."
"Don't be so hard on yourself," Blair sighed as she shifted herself and Charlotte so that they were snuggled up against Chuck, "You had to deal with a lot that year. Headmistress Queller knew that. After all, she didn't suspend you when you were smoking marijuana on school grounds."
"It was hashish," he clarified.
"Are we really going to argue over your drug of choice back in high school?" she replied as she looked at him in distain.
"No," he sighed, "But what exactly was your point?"
"My point was that you went through a lot during our senior year. You would have graduated easily if . . ." she trailed off. She didn't want to say the words. She knew how difficult that time in Chuck's life was . . . and still is.
"My father hadn't died in the accident," Chuck finished for her. He could hear the hesitation in her voice, and he understood it. She knew what a touchy issue his father's death was for him. "You can say it, Blair. I'm not going to turn into a pile of mush at the mere mention of it."
"I'm not so sure I agree with that statement," she responded as she leaned into his embrace even further as she felt his entire body begin to tense as the conversation shifted to the subject he loathed more than anything else.
"Can we please not talk about this?" Chuck requested as he fought internally to keep his voice calm and even. He hated that even after all these years his father was still a hot button issue. He wanted to be over all of the anger and pain that came with the memories of his father. He looked at his daughter and wondered how his father got to the heartless place he did. He couldn't imagine ever allowing himself to do any of the heartless things his father did to him to Charlotte.
"Okay," Blair agreed as she kissed his cheek as his arms encircled her so that he could take Charlotte's hand and still have his arms around his wife. "We can let the conversation go . . . for now." Chuck sighed as Charlotte put her head against her mother's shoulder and drifted off to sleep.
"She's not going to enjoy her first carriage ride," Chuck spoke softly upon realizing that Charlotte was asleep as they pulled up to Central Park where the carriages were lined up waiting for patrons.
"Sure she will," Blair stated as she began to re-bundle Charlotte while being careful not to wake her. She could see Chuck's internal struggle with trying to decide if they should continue on with their evening plans. It was beginning to snow, and he didn't want Blair or Charlotte to get cold.
"Blair, I . . ." he began before she cut him off as she slid around him and signaled for Arthur to open the door for her.
"You can wait here for me and Charlotte if you want," she called over her shoulder as she bounced towards the first carriage in the line with Charlotte in her arms, "We shouldn't be more than two or three hours."
Chuck quickly got out of the car and jogged towards the carriage, jumping in just as it took off towards the park. He was still getting situated as they turned into the park.
Charlotte's eyes popped open as soon as they were in Central Park as if she knew what she could be missing if she continued to sleep. When the snow started falling harder she tried to catch the flakes with her tiny gloved hands. She looked at her parents curiously when they melted as if to ask where the fluffy flake had gone. Chuck and Blair curled into each other and enjoyed watching Charlotte take in the sights.
"Is Charlotte asleep?" Chuck inquired as he watched Blair stroll into their bedroom after successfully putting Charlotte to sleep in her room. It wasn't often that their daughter slept in her actual bedroom, as she usually slept in the crib in the corner of their room, but Blair wanted to speak to her husband without the need to censor her words or keep her voice down. Chuck seemed to anticipate the confrontation that was approaching as he had already removed his jacket and tie, and loosened a couple of buttons on his shirt to get comfortable. He was now sitting at the end of the bed waiting patiently for her.
"Sleeping like an angel," she smiled as she walked towards his nightstand and took a hold of the baby monitor to turn it on.
"I don't suppose there is any chance that we can skip the argument and go straight to the make up sex," he tried to lighten the mood. Her face looked too serious at the moment. He earned a scowl of disapproval, which told him that he had just wasted his breath. He took a deep breath as he prepared himself for the battle he knew that was to come.
"It's been over eight years," she snapped as she set the baby monitor down harder, "It's been eight years since your father died. It was undeniably sudden and extremely sad, but your wounds are still as fresh as they were eight years ago when you nearly drunk yourself into oblivion. We need to do something about this. I cannot continue to watch you fall apart year after year on the anniversary of your father's death. It hurts too much. I tried to distract you this year. I planned an elaborate day with your daughter, and I thought you did very well until she went to sleep. Then you crumbled in my arms."
"Blair," he began.
"No, you need to let me finish," she demanded as she cut him off, "I love you too much to allow this to continue the way it has been." She took a deep breath to calm herself down. "You and I are going to come up with a plan of action. We are going to figure this out once and for all."
"What do you want from me?" he bellowed as he felt his anger begin to boil over, "Do you want me to try therapy? It's not going to help. They are going to try and tell me the same things that you keep trying to pound into my thick skull. My father loved me. He had a shitty way of showing it. He believed in me. He gave me his precious company. None of these words mean anything to me because they aren't true. My father despised me. I was a daily reminder of the most precious thing he had in his life that he lost."
"Chuck, you need to stop blaming yourself for your mother's death," she groaned, "You did not kill her."
"Yes, I did," he hissed through gritted teeth. "If she hadn't had me, she would still be alive today."
"You don't know that," she held her ground. "Would you have held Charlotte responsible?"
"What?" he exploded.
"If I had died while giving birth to Charlotte . . . would you have held her responsible," Blair elaborated.
"That is completely different," he growled as his eyes darkened in anger. His heart skipped a beat at the thought of her dying during childbirth. It was truly his worst nightmare.
"It's the exact same," she insisted, "You were an innocent baby just like Charlotte is now. If your father blamed you for your mother's death, which I cannot believe that he did, then he was wrong."
"Can't you just let this go?" he demanded, "Can't you just let me deal with this in my own way? It's just one day a year."
"No," she insisted, "Because this isn't about just one day of the year. This carries over into all other aspects of our life. Your work is the best example. I have watched you push yourself to the edge of exhaustion to prove that you are a better businessman than Bart Bass. Now you're trying to prove that you're a better father."
"I am a better father," he stood up straight.
"Perhaps," she nodded, "But you don't have anything to prove to anyone, certainly not me. You're the man that I love unconditionally. You're the father of my child. You're my lover and my best friend. I want you to be happy every day of the year."
"What do you want me to do?" he sighed as his anger melted away.
"I want you to figure out a way to get through the anniversary without falling apart. I want you to stop thinking that your father hated you. I want you to let yourself heal. However you do that is up to you, but promise me that you'll try," she stated as she stepped towards him and put her arms around his shoulders to pull him close.
"I'll try," he nodded as she molded herself against him as she began to nibble at his Adam's apple, "For you and Charlotte, I promise to try."
"Thank you," she mumbled into his skin as she felt him unzip her skirt and allow it to fall to the floor. His hands trailed to her backside and lifted her off her feet ever so slightly. Blair took that as her cue and wrapped her legs around his waist as she ground her pelvis against him. They let out simultaneous moans of pleasure.
"Are we done arguing?" he inquired suggestively as his lips traced the shell of her ear, "Can we move on to the makeup sex yet?"
His words caused a shiver of delight to shoot straight down Blair's spine as she nodded into his neck. He smirked at the effect he was having on her as his hands began to caress the cashmere fabric covering her back.
"Too many clothes," Blair moaned as she fisted his silk dress shirt as he lowered her to the soft red down comforter that currently covered their bed, a new addition for the holidays. "I hope you don't have any attachment to any of the clothes that you are wearing because I think I'm going to need to shred them."
"Feel free," he chuckled hoarsely as his tongue dipped into the crater of her shoulder blade as he slid the fabric of her sweater away. The words had barely left his lips when he heard the distinct sound of buttons giving way and seams screaming for release.
"Chuck," she gasped as her lips began to roam the solid plains of his chest as she rolled herself on top of him. The sprinkling of hair that covered him and tickled her nose added to the heady sensation of need she felt for him as he lowered himself to the bed and allowed her free reign of his body. It wasn't too often that she took the time to explore him. While they made love dozens of times a week, since Charlotte was born it had been rushed and often times frantic. She had forgotten how much she loved to touch him.
Chuck tried to call out to her to tell her how much he was enjoying what she was doing, but the words got stuck somewhere between his brain and his throat. All he could manage was an inarticulate grunt. He heard her giggles in response as she kissed her way lower to his belly button, her tongue dipping in. He knew where her lips were heading as her hands began to work him free of his trousers, but he had to stop her. She stuck out her bottom lip to pout in protest.
"Later, perhaps," he coughed out as he sat up and crashed his parched lips against her soft moist ones. As she straddled his torso and hovered over him, he discovered that he was completely nude underneath her, while she was still in her La Perlas. She was always a superlative sight in her lingerie, but at that moment he needed to feel her against him without any hindrances. He skillfully undid the clasp at her back with one hand as he used his other hand to lower one of the straps so that one of her breasts was quickly exposed. His irises darkened as his lust increased ten fold as he latched on to her exposed breast. Charlotte had only recently stopped breastfeeding, so her breasts were still tender. He was cognizant of that fact as his tongue traced her nipple delicately.
"Chuck," she gasped as she arched her back so her breast was fully available to him as her fingers entwined in his hair to pull him closer. He responded was suckling gently. Blair was panting for air as he released her first breast and turned to give her other breast equal attention.
Suddenly, clear as day, they heard Charlotte cry out. They paused and looked each other directly in the eyes. They desperately wanted to continue, but they were torn about their daughter needing them.
"We should go to her," Blair spoke up. Chuck nodded as she rose off him and felt for her robe, which was at the end of the bed. She was out the door before Chuck could find his robe. He was still sliding it over his shoulders as he entered Charlotte's room to see Blair picking her up and bouncing her up and down.
"What's the matter, Sweetheart?" Blair inquired as Charlotte curled against her shoulder and lowered her head. Her eyes drifted shut as she instantly fell back to sleep.
"She's not used to sleeping in here," Chuck stated as he kissed Blair softly on the lips as he rubbed Charlotte's back gently.
"Do we risk taking her back to our room?" Blair inquired as she swayed back and forth slightly. One look at the glassy expression in her eyes, told Chuck that Charlotte hadn't put a damper on her mood. "We were being a little louder than usual."
"Correction, you were being a little louder than usual," he chuckled as he guided his wife towards their bedroom, "And it's going to take a lot more than that to wake Charlotte."
Once Charlotte was secure in her crib in her parents' bedroom, Chuck and Blair took their spots on their bed once more. Their robes fell to the floor in their haste to pick up where they left off.
"Now where were we?" Chuck grinned as his wife positioned her breast at his lips as she straddled his waist once more.
"Right about here," she replied as she thrust her breast into his face. His mouth opened eagerly to accept her.
He took a little more time than he normally would with their foreplay, as he wanted to make sure that she was one hundred percent ready for him when he flipped their positions. While their momentarily interruption did nothing to damper his mood, he thought perhaps it might to hers. As he entered her slowly, he realized he was most definitely wrong. She was more than ready to accept him.
"Took you long enough," she groaned as he slid in deeper.
"Forgive me," he whispered as he stilled inside her, intentionally resting at the spot he knew drove her wild, "I was being thorough."
"You're forgiven," she assured him as she thrust against him eagerly. "Please don't stop."
"I'm just getting started," he assured her as he slid out. She let out a whimper as he pulled out completely which quickly turned into a moan as he slid in again.
"Don't toy with me, Bass," she cautioned him, "Get to the point."
"Are you close?" he teased as he bit down lightly on her collarbone.
"So close," she agreed. His movements began to speed up as he drove in and out rhythmically. Just when she thought she had his movements figured out, he sped himself up and then slowed down. "Chuck, please."
"Let go, Love," he whispered against her ear, "I'll let go when you do."
"Promise," she demanded.
"Of course," he nodded. Her head fell back against the feather pillow as she arched up against him one final time. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as she exploded with pleasure. She vaguely heard the sound of him groaning against her throat as he released inside of her. The feel of him emptying himself into her was like no other in the world. It filled her with pride to know that she was the only one that ever had the pleasure of that experience. As he had told her many times, he was very diligent in handling his business before her.
Chuck collapsed on top of her, completely spent. Usually he tried to brace his upper body so that he wouldn't crush her, but he was beyond rational thought. Blair's last thought before she passed out was to wrap her limps around him fully so that she could enjoy the moment.
An 'I love you' hung in the room. Neither one knew or cared who said it as they drifted off to sleep. It was the most true statement either would ever speak.
TBC. . .