"Can't you see that you're smothering me?
Holding too tightly,
Afraid to loose control.
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you.
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,
And every second I waste is more than I can take.
I've become so numb,
I can't feel you there."
—Linkin Park
Lost Control
By SpacePirateGirl
Chapter Two
The last class of the day, the last class where Sasuke could torment me, the last class directly after P.E—Pre-calculus. Ever since I had befriended Hinata and Naruto, I had grown to love math, and due to my great reverence of the subject, the teacher Kakashi Hatake had allowed me to get into it, even though my grades had been low during my time with Ino.
Except today, I felt like anyone but myself. I hadn't even gotten a chance to say a quick goodbye to Hinata and Naruto. Sasuke had been waiting for me at the door, making sure I wouldn't be able to slip past him into the classroom and speak to my friends.
Hatake Kakashi allowed his students to sit wherever they wanted, and he was, perhaps, the only teacher who understood how Sasuke and his friends picked on me. I always had sat next to Hinata and Naruto, since the beginning of the year, and I began to head toward my regular seat until Sasuke stopped me by placing a hand on my shoulder.
"You're sitting with me," he explained, his voice dark to my ears.
I ignored the startled glances of Naruto and Hinata. Their eyes were painful to my heart. They didn't believe that Sasuke could have forced me into this; they only saw me with him freely, without anger. Yet I knew only the most meticulous of people could see a slight tint of grief on my face.
Sasuke chose his spot near the back, and ordered me to sit beside to him. I obeyed. In a class with possibly forty students, the bad section sat as far back as possible; the mediocre group, such as Ino, would sit in the second and third row, and the nerds would sit near the front. The worst half of school just didn't show up. I felt strange sitting so far away from the board.
His face beyond angry or mad, Naruto took large steps toward me. I stayed still as he finally reached my desk. "What the hell do you think you're doing, Sakura-chan?" he demanded.
"Uzumaki-kun, please stop." Hinata latched onto his arm. Even after a year of being her friend, I was still highly impressed that she no longer fainted at the mere sight of him, and now she was touching him—progress for sure.
Naruto shook her hands off his arm. "Sakura-chan! Why are you sitting with him?" His finger landed upon Sasuke sharply.
I kept my eyes on my desk, avoiding looking into his and spilling all the truth that would ruin this deal.
"She's here because she wants to be obviously."
Naruto turned to the Uchiha as he allowed all his vehemence to spill out at the sight of him. "That's not the Sakura-chan I know! You did something to her, you creep. You brainwashed her or something when you took her to the nurse's office last class. You're a jerk, a total jerk! Leave her alone!"
"Don't you see your hurting her feelings?"
"You're the one hurting her!"
"Naruto," I began softly, only loud enough for him to hear, "please stop. I've chosen new friends." The words were ripped from my throat, my throat that had a steady lump rising in it, choking me, forcing me to want to cry. I kept my eyes on my desk. Looking at my old friends would only cause me to stutter, and they wouldn't believe me.
I felt them inspect me and make sure I had not been beaten up or threatened. I knew they would be satisfied. I was in a perfectly healthy condition at the moment, despite my aching head and my hurt arm—but those they already knew about. Finally Naruto gave a small grunt and walked away. Hinata, on the other hand, stayed. "Is your arm better?"
I nodded. Hinata had always been like this; trying to please everyone, even though her own heart longed for something else. She didn't really want to talk to me.
"Just go sit with Naruto."
I was right. She was gone.
Hatake Kakashi finally entered the classroom—late by five minutes as always. His nose was in his favorite book that he claimed had to do with concepts "incomprehensive for children too young." He set the book down on his desk as his eyes tilted in a smile. "Sorry, I was late. I was lost on the path of life—"
The class groaned in response.
He inspected the seating arrangement of the day and frowned when his eyes landed on me. I stared at my hands. When I looked up, fortunately his frown had disappeared, and he returned to teaching the new lesson.
I promised myself to pay attention and do well, despite where I was sitting. But I soon found a folded piece of paper—a note—in my face almost immediately after the class had begun. At first I decided not to open it until Sasuke suddenly whispered from his seat, "Are you going back on the deal?"
It was at that moment that I fully registered what had happened. I was trapped. I had to do every single thing he said without question. I couldn't have an opinion anymore. I couldn't do well in school. I had to become one of the bad students. I was trapped. Reluctantly and not without tears, I opened the note, and we began to pass it back and forth.
Don't worry, Sasuke had written. Your friends will get over you.
Okay. Without knowing him that well and by being under his clutches, I couldn't really say anything. Would "why are you doing this to me" be too much, or would a simple "how have you been doing" sound too corny? We weren't friends, even if he wanted to be. I was merely stuck with him, and he was basing friendship on threats and deals.
You don't have to be so scared, you know. Talk to me.
Of course. He wanted to pretend we'd been buddies since kindergarten. But still I had no choice but to do what he said. Luckily for me, it seemed as if he didn't care what I told him on this note for now, so none of it applied to our deal.
Why are you doing this to me? I demanded, and sent the note back to him.
I thought I told you.
-Told me what? I asked, putting a tiny dash when I was writing since the note was getting a little confusing to read.
You're a pretty enough girl, and you don't give a shit about me. Besides, I really needed a girlfriend. Every girl in the school is stalking me, and it's really annoying.
-So you decided that since I'm one of the only ones who's not stalking you and since I'm the prettiest out of all of them, you think you can ruin my life?
Basically.
His words made me fume with anger and blush at the same time. I had never really considered myself beautiful, and now Sasuke, the hottest guy in the school, was telling me he thought I was pretty? I didn't know what to say, so I chose to change the subject. Besides, this question had been bothering me for quite a long while.
-Why do you come to this school? I've heard your parents are rich.
A reply didn't come for a long time, and I pondered whether or not that had been going too far.
But finally he wrote back. It's none of your business.
-Okay.
Another long gap of note passing occurred between us, but finally he returned the piece of paper.
It's because they don't think they can afford a better private school.
Hell, his parents were upper-upper high class. -Why the hell not?
He was reluctant to answer, I could tell. The way his onyx eyes stared at the note, the way my questions seemed to stab him with a million needles. He almost seemed as if he wanted to cry, which was not something you'd see Sasuke Uchiha do on a daily basis.
My older brother's going to Princeton. Without a scholarship. My parents don't like to spend too much money.
-Oh. Sorry.
Not your problem.
As much as I hated him, as much as I loathed him with a desperate passion, I couldn't help but also pity him. From what he had said. Going to a college like Princeton without a scholarship was hugely expensive. And thrifty parents would only create an assumption of being bankrupt, even if they really weren't. Rich people didn't necessarily believe Princeton was cheap. It was more of a learned-by-raising type of thing.
-Um, so, I didn't know you had a brother.
Can we talk about something else?
-Yeah. Like what?
Do your parents expect you to be home tonight?
-No. My parents cared, at least, but they were busy too much of the time. If only everyone could have a combination of rich parents and loving parents, but I knew from experience parents like that just didn't exist.
Come to my house then.
It was an order. I could tell from a mile away. He wasn't even asking anything.
-Hey, if you wanted a friend when you came to me, then it's not going to work between us. I hate you. And since you don't know what real friends are like, you can't really give me orders on how to be one.
Not your problem, he wrote again.
-Uh, yeah. It is.
"Sakura Haruno, would you be so kind as to answer my question?" Kakashi suddenly asked as if he knew I wasn't paying any attention at all.
I felt heat rush to my face as I stared dumbly at him. I had no idea. "Uh . . ." Glancing at the problem on the board, I tried to derive the answer as quickly as possible, but he knew if I had been paying attention, I wouldn't need to. "I don't know," I answered honestly after at least thirty seconds had passed.
The class laughed at me, and more blood rushed to my face.
"I'd like to speak with you after class," Kakashi declared and returned to the lesson.
Tears rushed to my eyes, but I drove them back down.
I'll get them to stop laughing at you soon, Sasuke had promised when he sent the note back to me.
-Would you mind so much if I paid attention in class?
Yes. All I have to do is bribe Kakashi, and he'll give you a passing grade.
-Kakashi isn't like that!
Everyone is like that. I promise you. It doesn't matter if you pay attention.
-It matters to me! I want a job! A good job, not one of those lame jobs that got me stuck going here! I want to go to college.
Tough luck. Can we get back to the conversation?
More tears came, and I couldn't stop them this time. Why did my life have to be so ruined? Why? -I'm coming to your house tonight. We'll talk then.
I didn't read any further messages he sent to me. I raised my hand several times to answer questions. I made sure I understood the lesson completely. I wanted Kakashi to know that I really cared about my future.
Soon class ended, and I went to talk to Kakashi as Sasuke waited for me to come outside the classroom after I finished.
"Sakura," Kakashi began slowly, "are you sure you're ready for this class?"
I had promised I would work hard, but with my life taking an unexpected turn, I wasn't so sure anymore. Maybe I could somehow sort things out with Sasuke before my life plummeted to the ground. "I'm sorry about today. It won't happen again," I said, deciding to change my mind later if I had to.
He nodded understandingly. "Good. I'll see you tomorrow then."
Leaving the classroom quickly, I struggled not to wince when Sasuke grabbed my wrapped up arm and pulled me down the hallway. "Sasuke," I began slowly, "my arm . . ."
He glanced at me, frowning in confusion, but finally understanding came to his eyes. Sasuke released my arm and grabbed my other one. I didn't know where we were going. He pulled me along toward a place I hardly ever went to—the cafeteria. Usually I liked to eat outside where there were less people to tease me, so being led to a table in the cafeteria was a strange occurrence.
Sasuke sat down near a group of people and told me to do so as well. Neji and Kiba were there, and I nearly bristled at the mere sight of them. Sai, another one of Sasuke's friends, was there, and next to him sat Ino, leaning on his shoulder.
"Sasuke-kun, what the hell is forehead girl doing here?" Ino demanded, jumping off Sai the moment I sat down. It seemed that her crush on Sasuke had not dissipated, even though she was currently Sai's girlfriend.
Sasuke ignored the blonde and looked at each of his friends individually. "Everybody, meet Haruno Sakura, my new girlfriend."
I suppressed shivers when Sasuke placed his arm around my shoulders while he spoke. Everybody who heard had his jaw dropped to the floor in a moment. Ino's blue eyes were the first to grow angry. "Forehead girl? Your girlfriend?" She gasped as if she were about to faint. I didn't blame her. She would be hysterical that Sasuke was no longer up for grabs.
"You're joking," Sai guessed, though his face was blank.
Sasuke shook his head, and whispered under his breath to me; "Make them believe it."
Biting my lip, I tried to smile at them, to tell them it wasn't a joke, no matter how much I wished it was just a dream. "Yeah, he asked me," I said, "and I said yes. We're together now."
Kiba was the first to grin. "Ha, never thought you'd end up with your worst enemy, Sasuke."
Sasuke didn't answer with anything else but another smirk. A few moments of silence passed before he spoke. "Ino."
She still appeared quite stunned, and her shoulders were quite tense. I could tell since her shirt was spaghetti strapped and tight, leaving nothing hidden from the eye. "Yeah?" Her voice was tiny and high-pitched.
"When are you going shopping again?" he asked, icily daring her to disbelieve the declaration of his girlfriend.
"Um . . . tomorrow probably. My mom finally paid me for helping her with the flower shop, and I'm tired of my old clothes. Why?"
"Take Sakura with you. Help her choose some new clothes."
I frowned at Sasuke in surprise. Why would he do that? Not only did he want me to become his girlfriend, do everything he said, grow my hair out, but he also wanted me to change my entire wardrobe? I detested shopping with a passion. Besides, it wasn't as if I had the money for it anyway.
"You got it." Ino eyed my clothes disdainfully, and instantly brightened up. "At least you won't be walking around with horrible clothes anymore, Sakura. Being Sasuke's girlfriend requires much more clothes."
She would know. Sasuke and Ino had broken at the end of last year, though they had been together for a full year. However, I didn't enjoy the implication she was making. Was she saying that Sasuke enjoyed fucking his past girlfriends, leaving their clothes disheveled and shredded or something? I certainly hoped not. I bit back a smile—the image was a bit humorous.
A song began to play softly in the background, and Sasuke reached for his phone. He answered it after glancing at the caller identification.
"Hello?" he said.
There was a pause.
"Okay, I'll be right out." His voice had transformed from a polite greeting to an angry snap before he hung up and shoved the phone back into its pocket.
"Itachi again?" guessed Kiba, who was the only one not staring directly at me.
"Yeah." Sasuke took my hand and stood up with me following immediately. Confused, I blinked at the Uchiha while waiting for an explanation. He didn't even meet my gaze. "Later, everybody," he said, and pulled me away from them.
As we walked—or as Sasuke dragged me along—I wondered what Hinata and Naruto were up to. Probably walking home toward Naruto's house since Hinata disliked being with her cousin Neji. I could remember the days when my friends would sleep over at either my house or Hinata's since none of our parents really cared. Those days were already far in the past though. I doubted they would ever return.
Suddenly I remembered Sasuke's decision with Ino. "I don't have much money, Sasuke," I told him apathetically. "I won't be able to buy any clothes."
"You can borrow—"
"I'll never get any money," I corrected before he could continue. "Borrowing will only make it worse."
"You can have some of mine then."
Of course. Uchiha Sasuke was the son of rich and famous parents. Money was probably springing out of his ears literally. Money to him was like trees in a rainforest. More than plenty. I bit back a sigh as we left the building, and he pulled me toward the street in front of us.
"Sasuke!" shouted somebody from behind. So much going on—a headache had already evolved while I was trying to process all of Sasuke's friends and remember them. Nevertheless, I glanced back to see who it was.
"What do you want?" Sasuke demanded from the girl who was approaching steadily.
She wasn't exactly tall, but she wasn't short either. She was probably one of the sophomores, whom I didn't know too well. Her eyes were a hazel type of brown, and her chocolate brown hair had been placed in two buns at the top of her head. Frankly her hair-do looked like a panda to me, but I kept my mouth shut.
If she saw me at Sasuke's side, she didn't make it known. This girl—this sophomore—didn't even glance at me. At least, I wasn't being stared at like a human experiment, the way the rest of Sasuke's friends stared at me recently, but then again I had a feeling she was not one of Sasuke's normal friends.
"Trying to sneak away without me knowing? You promised you'd take me today," she stated, her voice cold and angry. Apparently they were talking about something I had no idea about.
"Take you where?" Sasuke asked. I could hear the lie in his voice though. He knew what this girl was talking about.
"Don't give me that. You said you'd help me perfect my lay-ups at the basketball court today. Remember?"
"Oh." He acted as if he had just barely remembered. "Sorry, Tenten, not today. I'm busy."
"The try-outs for girl's basketball are tomorrow, and you promised. I just need a little advice."
"Tough."
Sasuke forced me to turn around, and he began leading me away, half-dragging me again. Suddenly what that girl said stopped him in his tracks. "Fine," was what she began to say. "I'll just tell Itachi that you're a liar, and he'll sympathetically help me instead. He's picking you up from school today, isn't he? Perfect. For me, that is."
Uchiha Sasuke turned back, his onyx eyes overwhelmed with outrage. "You wouldn't."
"I would." Her voice was different now, almost smug. She was smirking as if she were some two-year-old whose tantrum had just succeeded in getting her something sweet. After a pause of silence, she decided to speak again, her voice taunting and still with the hint of smugness. "You promised."
He turned to me. "Will you mind?"
I felt the urge to let my jaw drop to the ground. Uchiha Sasuke had knowingly made me his "slave" in a way, and now he was actually asking for my opinion on things? Obviously this girl and the threat of being tattled on in front of this Itachi person was screwing with his head. But I shrugged to answer his question anyway. "Do I really have a choice?"
"Yes, you have a choice," he answered.
I shook my head to rattle the weird words out, but he knew I wasn't declining what he wanted. "Nah, it's okay. Whatever you want." Why was Sasuke being so nice?
"If you're done talking to that girl, I'm still waiting for an answer, you know," Tenten complained.
Finally Sasuke relented. "You know, sometimes I wish you would just die."
She grinned as if the answer was a yes.
"Come on."
She took her place at Sasuke's other side, and once again, we began walking toward wherever Sasuke was leading us. This time though, I wasn't being dragged. For once, being next to my greatest enemy at Konoha High wasn't too bad. I smiled triumphantly.
"Itachi's better than you at the lay-up," Tenten said and glanced at the Uchiha. "He never misses. Maybe I should still ask him instead since you were a jerk—"
"Now what do you want? Do you have some problem with people who actually are busy once in a while?"
"Nah, I only have a problem with rich jerks who have attitudes. And I just want to get on your nerves."
"I'll tell Itachi you're my girlfriend, so he won't help you with lay-ups—"
"I'll tell everyone you said I was your girlfriend—"
"All right, all right. Just don't ask Itachi, okay?"
She grinned again. "Okay."
I watched the two of them, fascinated with their bickering. Maybe they weren't exactly friends, but they sure knew each other well enough to hit the other's weak points. But this girl seemed to enjoy Sasuke's company—not because he was attractive or because she would be bullied if she chose to dislike him. No, she enjoyed being with him because she understood Sasuke and was willing to become friends with him. I wondered how anyone would want to be Sasuke's friend, excluding all the outrageous girls who wanted much more than friendship.
"Who is she anyway?" asked Tenten when we finally reached the sidewalk. Her eyes had finally begun examining me, and I nervously smiled. It felt strange to suddenly be the center of attention, but walking next to an Uchiha and holding hands with one would probably do that.
"My girlfriend," Sasuke answered emotionlessly. He didn't really seem to care that she was asking personal questions, even though only a minute ago they had been arguing.
"Oh," Tenten said like a child who had just learned what to call a butterfly. "So I guess my blackmail of telling everyone that you're my boyfriend doesn't really work anymore, right?"
Sasuke smirked. "Right." He stopped walking suddenly, and Tenten mimicked him instantly. I wasn't ready for the abrupt halt, and almost bumped into Sasuke. Luckily my reaction time wasn't so bad. I jumped back before I could get too close.
The car Sasuke had stopped by was a black SUV, or at least as far as I knew. I didn't really have a complete knowledge on cars, but I was pretty sure on the SUV in front of me. Tenten hopped in as if it were her own ride, and shaking his head at her, obviously amused, Sasuke got in afterward. I followed him in a moment, and sat next to him when he took the middle seat.
The driver was playing on some system—game-boy or nintendo DS, I wasn't sure. When we got in the car, he didn't put it away. Upon closer inspection, I saw that despite the more lightly colored hair and the wrinkles near his eyes, he looked a lot like Sasuke. Maybe he was that "brother" we were talking about before.
"Hey, Itachi." Tenten leaned forward and stared at the driver through her eyelashes. "Sasuke threatened not to help me with basketball like he promised."
Sasuke rolled his eyes before the one named Itachi could reply. "You're not pretty enough to flirt."
"Itachi?"
The driver put his game away and flipped on the car. "Maybe Sasuke's afraid he can't help you."
"He should be," responded Tenten. "You're better at it than him, after all—"
"Stop talking about Sasuke like he's not here!" The words slipped through my mouth before I could even stop them. Awkwardly I glanced at Sasuke, relieved when his expression was not one of annoyance but one of thanks. Realizing that he probably thought I was just keeping the act of being his girlfriend up, I sighed in relief.
Itachi looked over his shoulder at me as he began to drive forward. I blushed and averted my gaze. He was attractive. Very attractive. But I hated to know he was driving without looking where he was going. Luckily when I chanced another glance at him, his eyes were back on the road. "Who's the girl?" he asked with little interest.
"Sasuke's girlfriend," Tenten answered. "Funny, too, because I've only seen her get beaten up by Sasuke . . . If I remember correctly. She's tough—for a nerd, that is."
"I'm not a nerd." So even somebody who I had never seen in my life knew about me? I guess I had attracted a lot of attention when standing up against Sasuke—and I was probably getting more attention now. I sighed. I wished this wasn't happening. I wished I could just switch to another "bad" school. But then again, I'd probably get into the same fix I was in now.
The car trip passed in silence for a while until Itachi spoke. "The basketball court by our house, right?"
"Right," Sasuke agreed. Faintly surprised, I glanced at him. He hadn't spoken from the moment we had entered the car. I wondered if it had something to do with Itachi . . . It wouldn't be too much of a surprise, after all. Brothers rarely got along. Even though I was an only child, I could see that much from those around me.
The car came to a stop near a few basketball courts, lined up near an elementary school. I got out of the car first, and Sasuke was quick to follow. Tenten gave one last flirting goodbye to Itachi and closed the car door. Now that she was out, however, all signs of flirting vanished. "God, he's so creepy. How do you put up with him?"
"I don't," Sasuke answered. He was holding my free hand, and I could feel it shaking slightly. My eyes examined him thoroughly. His face was blank, but his onyx eyes still held a tint of discontent.
Without realizing what I was doing, I squeezed his hand to comfort him. I never could find out why. It was as if . . . I didn't know. Maybe some urge to comfort someone under stress, some girl instinct to hug someone who was upset. He threw me a look, half of it saying "leave me alone," and the other half grateful. Faking a slight smile, I pretended to only see the grateful part in his expression.
Tenten seemed completely out of the silent conversation going on as she reached into her backpack and retrieved a regular basketball to play with.
Onyx eyes turning curious, Sasuke eyed the ball in her hands. "You really weren't going to take a no for an answer, were you?"
She grinned. "Of course not. Come help me now." The girl started walking off leaving her backpack in the middle of the sidewalk as if she had forgotten it. She went toward the first hoop she could find and started shooting to warm up.
I heard Sasuke let out a sigh of frustration as he released my hand and picked up Tenten's backpack. "I promise this won't take long," he told me, and I followed him to the same hoop. Sitting down on the grass where Sasuke had left Tenten's backpack, I took out my homework while thinking this was probably going to be my only chance to sneak it in.
Checking over my answers at least three times each, I did my math homework first. It didn't take too long. Hatake Kakashi was a very good teacher, and I had learned very quickly when I was lucky enough to get into his class. I still felt a little guilty over that one question today that I had not been able to answer. It's just one question, I reminded myself. And I was just getting absorbed into the note Sasuke was passing me. I can pay attention to both at once.
I breathed in a big gulp of air, and moved on to my other homework. Sasuke had finished giving Tenten advice on her lay-ups and now they were engaged in a one-on-one basketball game. I paused from writing the paragraph assigned in English, and watched them play. From all my years of knowing him, Sasuke had never been happy. Certainly, he was triumphant and childish when picking on people—including myself—but never had he really seemed . . . well, happy. But now, as I watched him run up and down the court, trying to score points, I could tell that he was no longer the obnoxious guy I had become enemies with. He was happy. Maybe this was the Sasuke that I had used to have a crush on, that Ino had a crush on. Maybe this was the Sasuke, who was Tenten's friend. Maybe this was the Sasuke who was trying to become my friend, instead of controlling me.
And though I hated to admit it, this happy Sasuke could be the one I opened up to—not to the rude and hateful Sasuke, but the one playing basketball right now. I shook my head and returned to my homework.
A/N: Hey, I didn't like this chapter much. Just basically introducing more characters... Well, I'm not sure I'm 100 percent happy with ANY of the chapters, lol, but we'll see how it goes. Thanks for those fifteen reviews. WOW! That made me so excited. ^^ Thanks so much, everyone!