A/N: I can't believe people are still reading this. -hides- It's soo laame!! Guess all a 10review/chapter needs is SasuSaku romance in a highschool story. :P Thanks for staying with it though, and this chapter is NOT edited a TINGE. I hardly even remember what happens in it. Thanks again. ^^ Oh, and by the way, the next chapter is the last. ^^ Cya.

Narutofan20: Oh, I agree completely!! I would never have posted this a year ago, and I wish I'd revised back then when I had enthusiasm for it. But I really am wanting to get this story over with, so thanks for the criticism! ^^ I posted this story a year too late to fix the stuff criticized. :P

"Can't you see that you're smothering me?
Holding too tightly,
Afraid to loose control.
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you.
Every step that I take is another mistake to you,
And every second I waste is more than I can take.
I've become so numb,
I can't feel you there."

—Lincoln Park

Lost Control
By SpacePirateGirl

Chapter 7

"Forehead-girl, forehead-girl, forehead-girl," chanted my classmates in my ears. They screamed and yelled and threw a few rocks at me. I hated my life. Second grade, and already I had thoughts of suicide.

Until the first Monday of September in third grade. That day everything had changed. "Hey, I'm Ino," greeted a blonde, who knelt down next to me, scrutinizing my face, my body, my tears. "What's your name?"

"Sakura," I mumbled.

"You're so quiet, I can't even hear you! What's your name?"

"Sakura!" Lots of my classmates used that game as well—pretending not to hear me, making me shout things repeatedly without even knowing I was being compelled to do so. I hated being teased. And if she asked me my name again, I wouldn't go along with it.

Ino's fingers wiped away my falling tears gently. "Well, Sakura, you actually don't look half that bad, so stop crying."

I gasped but did not move until she helped me up.

"Meet me after class today. I'll show you a good way to fix your hair." She smiled brightly. "It'll look beautiful."

"Beautiful," I whispered and followed her as a duckling would follow its mother.

OOO

Uchiha Sasuke, black-eyed, raven-haired son of two wealthy parents, walked down the halls toward his class. I watched him go, almost gaining the courage to talk to him. My mouth opened, but as he walked by, I could make no sound, no noise. Instead, I took in a deep gulp of air and just watched him go by.

He was so attractive, so amazing. I had heard he was in the top percentage of all third grade students. If anything, I only wanted to be his friend. But somewhere inside, I could feel a crush developing. I loved Uchiha Sasuke. Would he ever love me? The happy side of him?

"Forehead girl, stop staring at Sasuke like that!" Ino screamed from across the hallway.

Blushing with embarrassment, I took my gaze away from Sasuke. He had probably heard Ino's complaint, and I hoped he didn't think any less of me. If only Ino didn't like Sasuke. If only I was better at hiding my secret love.

For our friendship was falling apart.

All over some boy.

OOO

"Cheerleading's dumb," I said matter-of-factly. "It's not even a sport."

"You wouldn't get it." Ino sighed and threw the rest of her lunch in the garbage. "It uses flexibility, strength to hold up other people. We do flips, cart-wheels—"

"Save it, please." I took my tray of food and also dumped it in the trash. "I've seen enough cheerleaders to know what they do."

Ino smirked. "You should try it, Sakura. It's fun. Better than doing school work all day."

"Whatever." We weren't exactly friends anymore. Ino had become an acquaintance, someone to sit with at lunch. Just as I wasn't much more to her. Ino had her own clique of friends, so I didn't feel guilty when avoiding her. The only problem was—that I was alone.

"Ooh, look, there's Sasuke," she said as her eyes fell on the raven-haired boy entering the cafeteria along with Kiba, Neji, and Sai.

My crush on Sasuke had gradually dissipated. I had never gotten around to telling him about my feelings, and eventually said feelings just faded away. I didn't care about him anymore. In fact, I would probably even like to kick his face, ever since he had acquired the hobby of "bullying" people.

"Oh my god, Sakura! He's looking right at you!"

Sure enough, Sasuke's onyx eyes were fixed on my emerald ones, and I looked down awkwardly. The desperate, longing look on his face. What had it been?

Not that I cared. "Hey, Ino, I'm gonna go sit outside."

Her cheerful façade fell. She knew our friendship had finally shattered. "Okay, see ya." She stood up and headed over toward the table Sasuke had sat up. I went outside.

I was surprised to find a blond boy under my favorite tree, the cherry blossom tree. My name meant cherry blossom, so I guess I always had a strange feeling of home around a cherry blossom tree. I approached the blond, who was cautiously watching me with steady, blue eyes.

He didn't appear to be a threat. He actually looked quite friendly. So I sat down next to him and leaned against the tree trunk. "Hey."

"Hey," he responded.

I smiled. "Well, what's your name?"

"Naruto." He stared at the air blankly, as if he wanted to ask me something but couldn't bring himself to do it.

I frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Well, I was just wondering," he began and looked at me with a huge grin on his face. "Will you go out with me?"

OOO

"Naruto, this is Hinata Hyuga," I introduced. "Hinata, this is Naruto Uzumaki."

"H-Hello, Uzumaki-kun." Her cheeks illuminated to an almost florescent red, and I caught her before she fainted.

Naruto, oblivious to all that had just happened, grinned a wide smile. "Hey, Hinata."

We ate lunch together. Ten minutes before the bell for the next class would ring, Hinata claimed she had left something in her locker and ran to get there. I understood she just needed to calm down after finally being introduced to her true love, compliments to me.

Naruto put a hand on my shoulder. "Hinata Hyuga?"

I threw a warning glare at him. "You got a problem with that?"

He stared at the ground beneath us. "I mean . . . Well, I was just wondering."

I smiled apologetically. The urge to defend my friend had risen so quickly and so intolerably that it had escaped my mouth before I could stop it. Everyone teased Hinata, how she was related to Neji, and they all judged her. They all thought she was a bitch, just because she was related to someone. I had grown accustomed to protecting her. "Neji is her cousin," I explained. "Hinata is the daughter of two really rich parents. Neji's always been a bad kid, so he was sent here. Hinata's very kind. She didn't think it was fair that Neji was forced here, so she followed him. And now, they go here together. He still hates her though, and she avoids him."

"Right." Naruto nodded and gave me a thumbs-up. "Thanks for telling me."

"What about you?" I asked curiously. "What are you doing here?"

He sighed, his usual cheerfulness vanishing quickly. "My parents died in a car accident. I was thirteen."

"Oh." That was two years ago. He must still have been grieving for his parents. "I'm sorry."

"Nah, it's okay. They weren't the best parents in the world," he admitted. "I was sent to an orphanage, and they sent me here. They don't really care whether or not we get an education, just as long as they follow the minimum amount of laws."

There was a pause of silence as the information hung in the air. I inferred from it how lonely Naruto must have been, must still be. I grabbed his hand and held it. "I'm glad I met you, Naruto." He would be a nice substitute for my long lost crush on Sasuke. "And yes, I will go out with you.".

Only later did I realize that Hinata was crying over the prospect of me and him being together. The minute I knew was the same minute I dumped him. He hadn't cared. We had been falling apart anyway, and it was best to just stay friends.

OOO

Hinata fell to the ground, and cried out in pain. Naruto and I knelt beside her as I patted her on the head, promising her that everything would be all right in the end. Neji approached us, rubbing his knuckles on the hand that had just landed a punch.

The Hyuga stared up at her cousin, eyes glistening with tears. "Why are y-you doing this?" she desperately asked. "Wh-why?"

He smirked. "Can't you say a full sentence without stuttering." Neji threw another punch toward her, but Naruto stood in the way as his anger got the better of him. A fist fight spewed, and a crowd of students gathered, cheering either Neji or Naruto—mostly Neji—on. I tried to stop them, but they only pushed me away.

Security guards rushed over and stopped the fight. Naruto and Neji served a long detention, a suspension, and almost an expulsion, though the school's threats of being expelled were empty. This was the worst school in the state, possibly even the country. There was just nowhere for us to go, nowhere for them to send us.

After the suspension, Naruto and Neji fought again.

OOO

"Hello, Sakura-chan."

"Oh, hello, Sasuke-san," I greeted straight back. I put on a fake smile and endured his polite pretense. With him, it was only a matter of time before he began the insults.

"I saw your mom the other day," Sasuke continued. "At the store. She didn't look so good. She couldn't even afford a loaf of bread."

The poverty part of my life was a silly insult. I was accustomed to treatment like he was giving me. I was used to the insults on how I could hardly afford food. So his teasing didn't bother me. "Hmm, that's funny. Because when she came home, she seemed to have that loaf of bread you're talking about."

He chuckled slightly. "Yes, I suppose she did get in the end. Maybe she stole it, I don't know."

A solid hit to my family. I couldn't take it! I would give anything to kick him in the face, kick him in between the legs. Beat him to a pulp. But suddenly I felt Naruto's hands grab my shoulders before I could lunge forward and attack. "Fuck you, Sasuke!" I screamed as Naruto dragged me off.

Sasuke took a few steps toward me, faster than I could be taken away. "Yeah, yeah. Fuck you, too. But anyway, I just wanted to ask you. Is your mom okay? She looked really . . . hung over. Was she drunk the night before or something? Or did she quit her drinking problem?"

"She quit, you idiot!" I threw Naruto off my shoulders and charged at Sasuke. My hands aimed wild punches while I kicked every so often. Sasuke easily dodged every one of them, and threw a few of his own. Before I knew it, I couldn't see out of one eye, I couldn't breathe, and my nose was surely broken.

I hated Uchiha Sasuke and his followers, his minions.

I hated them all.

Sasuke left my injured body in the custody of Naruto, who took me quickly to the nurse's office.

The next day, I tried to tackle him again.

OOO

Every night, I wasn't sure what was a nightmare and what was reality. Though I was positive I could have easily named my reality a living nightmare. I wasn't really trapped. I could have gotten away easily. I could have ran.

But I wouldn't.

Hinata and Naruto depended on me. If I abandoned my nightmare, I would abandon their safety as well. In my mind it was a trap, there was no escape, I couldn't have ran. And so I stayed.

He wasn't even pinning me down. He was making no effort to keep me restrained, for I just sat there like a toy doll, allowing him to do whatever he wished.

Sasuke ripped my shirt off, and I cringed at the breath of hot air on my neck. His lips were everywhere, or so it seemed. I wanted to vomit, just from the thought of where he was touching me. His hands caressed my chest, and I whimpered, almost begging him to stop.

Then his lips pressed against my own, and I gasped for breath when they were gone.


"Sasuke, please," I cried. "Stop it." I felt him begin to get down to the real climax of the scene. "Stop it!" I screamed. I was not going to make a mistake and get pregnant. My parents had stressed it so much that it was ingrained in my mind.

Sasuke stopped.

I breathed in a deep gulp of air and opened my eyes. Not only my shirt, but he had ripped my skirt and underwear off, too, when I hadn't been paying attention. I backed deep into his mattress, hoping he would just stop, have mercy on me for just this one, damn night.

"Are you going back on the deal, Sakura-chan?" his voice whispered menacingly.

Wildly I shook my head. "N-no!" I paused. "I just . . . Please don't do this to me, Sasuke-kun. It's going a little too far."

He put a finger to my lips and shook his head to silence me. I resisted no more for the rest of the night. I laid as still as a rock, drowning in the endless sea of time.

OOO

My "monthly woman time" would begin today. I hated it when that happened. Like my mom, mine were normally heavier than usual. I had to go to the bathroom every two hours at the least. They were annoying. They drained my time.

And time was something I no longer had.

Time was something that Sasuke had taken from me.

I waited out the long hours of the day. Excuses came easily to me. I easily found quick trips to the bathroom, and still there was nothing. I wondered why. Though my periods were heavy, they always came on the due day—no exceptions. So why wasn't one happening now?

Suddenly I remembered how Hinata had been pregnant. A mistake.

I knew what had caused my sudden lapse in menstrual pattern.

A mistake.

Uchiha Sasuke.

OOO

It was Prom night, and Uchiha Sasuke had ordered me to come with him. Ino dressed me up in front of her huge bedroom mirror, and I closed my eyes, longing for my deprived sleep.

"You'll get used to it," Ino promised. "Your mind just has to adjust to the sleeping patterns."

"Jee, thanks," I muttered.

She laughed and took her hands away from my hair. "There, I'm done."

I glanced in the mirror and was stunned when I saw myself in a stunning pink dress that perfectly outlined my hair. A green sash was tied around my waist to compliment my eyes. I smiled. Then my pink, bubble-gum hair. It was longer now—much longer [??]. Ino had made a beautiful arrangement, fixed with emerald hair-clips. I was . . . beautiful. "Thanks, Ino. Thanks so much."

"Sure," Ino said. "Make sure Sasuke doesn't ruin the dress or anything though. It was expensive, and I was the one who paid for it this time."

It was the least I could do. I nodded at her. "Right. Thank you."

The night came quicker than expected, and suddenly a car honked from outside Ino's house. I raced out to catch it and jumped in the passenger seat. Sasuke sat behind the wheel. He glanced at me when I entered. "You look nice."

I swallowed. Accepting compliments from jerks was usually not my thing. But I didn't really have a choice. "Thanks," I responded briskly.

He sighed. "Please, Sakura. It's Prom. Try to be happy."

Maybe I could . . . Just this once.

OOO

"You were good this month," Sasuke praised as he would a pet. "As a reward, tomorrow you can do whatever you wish."

I smiled widely at him. "Really?"

"Really."

Then I hugged him deeply. I had waited forever for a free day. Finally it had come. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome."

OOO

Lots of legal stuff passed us by, and none of it I seemed to understand. All of it was basically who had killed who and who was hurt. What I hadn't known was that most of the blood on Sasuke's shirt had not been his parents' but his own.

"Did you stab Uchiha Mikoto with this knife?" The policeman held up the knife I had slain Itachi with. I still felt uncomfortable knowing I had killed someone.

"No." I made my voice serious and believable, despite my discontent.

"Did you stab Uchiha Fugaku with this knife?"

"No."

"Did you stab Uchiha Itachi with this knife?"

I gulped before answering. "Yes." I had gulped every time I had been asked. This was no different.

"What is the reason for your offensive action?"

I could answer that question--easily. "Sasuke was in trouble. I did it to protect him and myself."

The officer nodded, stood up, and left the room. A few seconds passed in silence while I breathed in deep breaths of relief. I was no longer afraid. I had never messed up, made a mistake. They would believe me. In fact, this had been the easiest interrogation I had experienced yet. The others required so much detail, so much guilt. Because I regretted being the murderer of Uchiha Itachi.

A murderer. I had become a murderer. The action of killing another person had never even crossed my mind. I had never thought a chance would ever arise. But the moment Sasuke's life had been on the line, I couldn't help but plunge that knife into Itachi's back. I hadn't thought. Acted—I had just acted.

The door opened again, and I practically begged to visit Sasuke. My imagination had taken its toll, images surfacing of a scared kid whose parents had been killed.

The police officer nodded at me. "Yes, you may see him now. But first you should know."

Eyes widening in surprise, I listened to what he had to say. The news was unbelievable! I gasped at the incredible nature of it. How could it be true? But the officer promised it was, and I knew I had to believe him. I wanted to jump with joy! But first—Sasuke.

The man led me to a waiting room, and I saw Sasuke, shivering under a blanket in one of the chairs near the fireplace. I had hardly noticed it was cold. Elation had soured so high that I felt too warm. I sat down next to him, but if he noticed, he didn't say anything.

"Sasuke," I began slowly. "What happened on Friday?" Two days had passed. It was Sunday night now. He should have been able to talk about it. I hoped he would.

He clenched his eyes shut and leaned on my shoulder. I put an arm around him comfortingly when I realized he was afraid of being alone. Then Sasuke began his story. "I was watching television when Itachi stabbed me with the knife," he whispered tearfully. "It hurt so bad. He told me . . . that it would hurt worse if I didn't do what he said. He made me . . . kill my mother, my father. And then I ran away and went to the bathroom and called you. If you hadn't come, I . . . I would have killed myself, too."

Before, in my mind, I had prepared myself for every story imaginable, every unbelievable tale. But this—I wasn't ready for. It hit me like a hard slap to the face, and I wanted to hug him forever, to tell him that it would be all right.

Still—there was a better way to make him happy again. "Sasuke," I began, struggling to keep my trembling voice calm. I was so excited to tell him what the police officer had told me. "It's a miracle, but your family isn't dead. And Itachi just had an extreme case of bipolar. He'll only need to take certain pills for the rest of his life. Everything will be okay."

And it would. There was no lie in my words.

Sasuke laughed happily.

Perfectly at ease.