Chapter 2: A Merging: Lord of The Rings and Twilight

In The World Of Twilight :

Bella and Edward were making out in the bed, ( Ewwwwww )

In The World Of Lord of the Rings:

Frodo, Sam, Pippin and Merry were at the Inn, waiting in horror as the black riders arrived in town, knocking down the guard and trampling into the street.

Hello readers, I have decided to continue this wonderful tale starting by reviving Edward (though I liked it better when he was dead- he is an important part of the story so he's alive- boohoo) and anyhoo I shall merge the two stories together again. YAY! *flash back to first chapter* ahh, good times. Well anyway- 1- 2 - 3! MERGE!

*GONG NOISE*

Now we will start our tale as :

The black riders slowly crept into Bella's room… as her and Edward slept. They raised their sword slowly over the bed unsuspectingly and then prepared to stab. However they miraculously missed and slashed open the pillows waking up Bella and Edward. A girlish scream sounded off and then Bella stared at Edward, "What kind of a scream was that!?" she snapped.

Edward began to babble, "Do I complain about the way you scream? NO! I just say ILL SAVE YOU! And I do! You don't do a thing but scream- so don't be so critical, just because I-!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAARAAAAAH!" sounded a torturous screech interrupting Edward's rant.

The black riders screeched and were swinging their swords randomly around in the fog of feathers that filled the air. The feathers from the pillows flew in the air giving Edward and Bella enough time to escape. So they went out the window and ran into the street.

"WHAT!? Where are we?!" cried Edward looking around to notice they were in a medieval village. "Oh crap, it's them again-" said Aragorn with his four hobbit companions following behind.

"Aragorn!?" said Bella remembering the first merging.

"Oh… hi… Bella…."said disappointed Aragorn.

"Hisssssss" growled jealous Edward.

Then Frodo had sudden epiphany- "OH YEAH!" he shouted

"Last time I saw you- Aragorn left Bella for the black riders."

"Oh yes- now I remember…." said Bella giving Aragorn an evil glare.

"Oh yeah hehe, hey Frodo- ix nay the itching day-" Aragorn said nervously.

"Oh, and let's not forget how he ate the apple Edward gave you-" said Frodo with a stupid grin. "And also there is how he-" Frodo was interrupted by Aragorn throwing his hand around his mouth.

"Well, anyway nice to see ya again but we must be on our way now- gotta get to Rivendale and vanquish Sauron, and what not-" laughed Aragorn panicky as he was pushing the hobbits along the road.

"What ever- " said Edward glad to see the ranger leave.

Later on- the hobbits and Aragorn had arrived at Rivendale. Aragorn walked in the gates saying " AT LAST! We may rest from our long journey to seek the wisdom of the sacred council and their splendid- WHAAA!?!?" shouted Aragorn confused as he opened the gates to see the suburban city of Forks Washington in front of him. He gaped at the filthy roads and littered sidewalks. "Where- where is- the towers of Elrond- and, and the waterfalls and bridges?! AND WHERE THE HECK ARE ALL THE PEACEFUL ELVEN FOLK!?" screamed Aragorn panting.

"I dunno… but I kinda like it here…." said Frodo staring at a jewelry shop with rings in the window.

"Yeah me too," said Sam staring out at a local bar.

"Well I don't! I prefer the solitude and peacefulness of Rivendale," said the stubborn Aragorn.

"Oh I see what's going on here," said Pippin grinning, "You wanna see Arwin!"

"Do not!" retorted Aragorn, blushing until he was red as a lobster.

"Oo la la!" said Merry nudging Aragorn's side.

"STOP IT! I- I- don't wanna go to Rivendale for Arwin, I wanna go to- to- see Bilbo! YES! Bilbo-"

"Nice try Aragorn! Bilbo is FRODO'S uncle!" said Sam crossing his arms.

"He is?" said Frodo with wide eyes.

"I- I mean- no. Of course not Frodo." said Sam.

"When's Bilbo gonna tell Frodo that he moved to Rivendale and claimed not to be his uncle because Frodo was so annoying?" whispered Pippin to Merry.

"When he takes off his restraining order against him-" answered Merry secretly. Pippin nodded in agreement.

"Well anyway I don't miss Arwin. Not one bit!" replied Aragorn.

"Yeah? PROVE IT!" said Sam.

"FINE!" said Aragorn, as he saw a girl walking just behind Sam, "And now is my chance to!" So Aragorn shoved Sam outa the way, walked to the girl,

turned around and kissed her. The girl slapped him and to Aragorn's dismay he found it was Bella with Edward at her side. "OH DISGUSTING!" cried Aragorn.

"What's that supposed to mean!?" cried Bella stomping on his foot.

"OW! That's not fair! I can't hit a girl!" he cried clutching at his foot.

Sam, Pippin, Frodo and Merry watched from the other side of the street, they couldn't hear the conversation because the crowds of people walking were too loud but they could just see Edward Bella and Aragorn from around the corner. "I don't care! I have Edward to protect me!" said Bella grabbing at Edward's hand.

Aragorn laughed, "Yes, I shall be afraid of the world's first gay vampire the day you're afraid of the world's first gay hobbit, Frodo!"

"I am NOT gay! … You're blonde friend just looks like a hot girl from the back" said Edward embarrassed as he remembered how he'd accidentally checked out Legolas.

"DON'T CALL MY BOYFRIEND GAY!" cried Bella.

"Tell him not to call my friend a hot girl!" shouted Aragorn.

"Don't tell me what to tell him!"

"Mon't tell meh wat tah tell heem!" mimicked Aragorn in an annoying baby voice sticking out his tongue.

Sam stared at Bella as she smacked Aragorn across the face and Sam laughed hysterically.

"Oh my gosh, Pippin, Merry, you gotta watch this! BWAHAHA! " he laughed as Bella punched Aragorn in the stomach. "All the fun of a cat fight without the worry of being smacked for laughing at this distance! Oh- he's about to get it in the- OOOF! Ow- he just got it in the-"

Bella and Edward walked away as Aragorn came back to his group with teary eyes and holding his crotch whimpering. Sam was rolling on the ground laughing and Pippin and Merry were eating their happy meals they had just bought and Frodo was no where in sight.

"Where's Frodo?" said the recovering Aragorn.

"I- haha- can't *snicker* remembahaha ahaha!" laughed Sam staring at the bruises on Aragorn's arms and legs. Sam got up and then Frodo came down the street. AVRAH BODAH DANCE NOW!

Frodo came down the street with a 70s afro, bell bottoms and a boom box playing AVRAH BODA DANCE NOW as he walked bouncing his afro as he came closer.

Sam took one look at his friend and broke into hysterical laughing again. "Oh brother…." said Aragorn rolling his eyes.

Pippin and Merry tried not to laugh with their mouths stuffed with French fries, but they began to spray the ground with French fries as they burst into giggling.

"Hey guys! That nifty tourist shop had some flippin' awesome stuff!" said Frodo happily.

Over where Bella and Edward were, they had just left out of the gates into Forks and were roaming the forest. They were in a meadow when Bella asked "Well… what now?". "According to our story line you have to figure out I'm a vampire-"

"Again?"

"Blame Stephanie Meyer-"

"What ever."

"Fine- AHEM- At least tell me something. You're impossibly fast and-"

"STOP STOP STOP!" cried Brianna (that's me ) barging in on their scene.

"Oh hi Brianna, how's our story going?" said Edward.

" Shut up! Now listen- you're boring our readers!"

"Oh. I am?" said Edward.

"Yes! You are-"

"Oh…. So what will we do? We have to put a piece of Twilight in the story or else it's not a merging of Lord of the Rings AND Twilight- it's just Lord of the Rings in Parody-" said Bella.

"Hmm… good point. … I know! Ok, now just- go on with your scene."

Said Brianna, POOF, with a cloud of smoke she disappeared.

"That was odd… oh well…" said Bella.

"…did ehs tahw rednow I" said Edward .

"What!? Edward?"

"!parc oh. Sdrawkcab gniklat m'I"

"Ohhhhhhhh- you're … talking backwards?"

Edward nodded with a frown.

"Oh well… we have to go on with our scene…"

"enif…enif…"

"Good."

"?diarfa ouy erA"

"No."

"eb dluohs uoy lleW"

Just then an orc came out of the woods. It hissed at them. "ARKAUSHKA! I FOUND THE TWO PRISONERS- the gay looking one and the fat one!" he said pointing to Bella and Edward. Just then a herd of orcs surrounded and kidnapped Bella and Edward.

~PAUSE~

Hello readers. I am the author and now it seems that I have to end the merging and witness the after effects of our converging. Happy reading-

Brianna

p.s. Sadly, this chapter ended with Edward alive. Captured. But alive. =( boo hoo, however I will write a third chapter, mwuahahaha.

In the world of Lord Of The Rings:

Frodo and Sam followed Gollum reluctantly. Then they made camp in a cave as Frodo fell asleep. "Soon… we shall be together… my precioussssssssss" said Gollum as he petted the lovely afro wig.

In the world of Twilight:

"esaelp noil niatnuoM" said Edward at the Cullen dinner table. Alice passed the Mountain Lion platter to Edward and they began to dine.

Author's note : There is a third chapter to come- thank you for all your critiques and compliments. I really appreciate it. =)