Chapter 10.
Planning
Since Mom and Dad had gotten married in the eighties her dress was more elaborate than I wanted, with a high sheer mandarin collar and a skirt made to be worn with a crinoline slip for maximum fullness. What we decided was to take out the sheer inset and the high collar leaving a pretty V-neck and long, narrow lace sleeves. We also decided to change the waistline and not use a crinoline slip. Her friends seemed confident that they could remove the skirt and clip out a lot of the fullness at the seams, then reattach it for a slimmer look. We also decided that the train was too much for outside, and instead I asked for a tea length dress which would mean that they wouldn't need to add fabric so it would fit me. I had to insist to the ladies that I didn't want to wear a veil since they seemed to think that every bride needed a lot of netting attached to her head.
Mom had gotten Kyle's measurements two weeks ago and someone was actually making him a shirt and pants that would go with the theme of our wedding. I was impressed with the talent of the women in the tribe and I was looking forward to our shopping trip the next day so we could buy gifts for many of them. I was beginning to love the potlatch idea even though the old fashioned ceremony could sometimes deteriorate into a way for wealthy tribesmen to show off. Mom had been planning something like this since I'd become engaged to Sam, so she'd had time to collect a multitude of gifts already. I liked that this wedding would be one where the guests received gifts rather than gave them. We'd also told anyone who asked that we wouldn't be able to carry much back with us so we didn't want gifts.
After the fitting I called Jacob to arrange for Kyle to spend time with him and his pack the next day. "He wants to show everyone how to shape shift like he does, but I thought you should know that there are concerns that it may weaken the bond of the pack if they can just....turn into an eagle and fly away. I know that I feel a bond with Kyle now, but I'm not sure that would translate the same with you and your pack. It's a concern and I wanted you to have a chance to think about it; maybe even ask Sam about it too." I had a memory and I smiled. "Jacob, now that I think about it, I still felt the bond on the last day I was in the pack! And even before that when I was in Alaska I could still feel the connection. And your alpha command worked even when I was a horse, so maybe this isn't such a bad thing after all!" We made arrangements for Kyle to meet with any who were interested the next day.
I spent the evening helping Mom prepare the potlatch gifts she had already collected and I was amazed at how varied the treasures were for the different people. Instead of favoring people of importance and status, she'd given the more lavish gifts to people who had less. Some of the gifts were simple things she'd made, but the baskets she'd woven were in the traditional style and very well made. She also made dolls in tribal costumes, and beaded necklaces from hand made clay beads. Some of the less advantaged guests would be going home with small kitchen appliances, warm blankets, new shoes; she'd actually confirmed sizes, hand knit sweaters, and even outdoor sporting equipment. I had no idea how she planned to wrap the fishing poles, but I was sure they would be appreciated. As I looked ahead to Saturday I knew that there was still much to be done, especially since we hadn't even begun the food preparation. Wisely Mom had decided to put someone else in charge of the food for the day of the wedding so she wouldn't be going crazy trying to oversee the feeding of all the guests.
It was a lot of small preparations that left me drained as the sun went down. When I finally saw Seth and Kyle coming through the door for dinner I barely had the energy to collapse into his arms. It took me a few minutes to notice the strange grin Seth couldn't seem to wipe off of his face. "Okay guys, what's up?" I was suddenly suspicious as they looked at each other guiltily.
We had a few minutes until dinner and they were anxious to show me what they had been up to. We went outside and Kyle actually picked me up and carried me across the uneven ground as we headed towards the trees and the storage shed. Seth disappeared behind the shed and I knew he was taking off his clothes to get ready to change; I'd seen him do this on many occasions. Kyle put me down and he waited for Seth. I was expecting to see the young wolf come around the shed, but what I saw instead was a squirrel! And I knew in a heartbeat it was Seth, the whole attitude was his even as the small creature in front of us. And he was small, not like the bigger animals we'd always changed into. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought that the squirrel I saw was just any other squirrel.
But the looks were where the similarity ended. Seth took off, lightening fast and all but flew up a nearby tree. I could barely see him as he leaped from branch to branch, jumping so far it seemed he was flying. I held my breath hoping he wouldn't slip or fall, but he was more agile than any animal I'd ever seen. When he jumped from the tree from about thirty feet up I gasped, watching him flip and tumble toward the ground. I ran to catch him, and he landed squarely on my head. I didn't expect the solidness of his body which felt like a stone where he hit my skull. Then he grabbed small fistfuls of my hair and slid to the ends and swung out like he was on a rope, only to let go and fly to Kyle to land lightly on his shoulder.
"Oh great, Tarzan the squirrel. I muttered as I rubbed the sore spot on the top of my head. The animal chattered at me, then leaped from Kyle's shoulder and scampered behind the shed. When he came back out he was still dressing, but he was so excited he could barely pull his shirt on.
"You two thought it was such a joke to think of me changing into a squirrel, but all I could think of was, 'Cool! Run through the trees, jump from the branches, be able to sneak up on enemies, and surprise them from above.' Not to mention if I get hungry I don't have to hunt something and kill it; acorns and nuts are all over the place! When Kyle told me it would be easier to change into an animal I was already familiar with, I knew I could do a squirrel. I've been watching them from my bedroom window for years, especially when some of the elders said you can tell what kind of winter we're going to have by the colors of their fur."
Kyle smiled and ruffled Seth's hair. "I think I might have had a wrong idea about shape shifting. I've been so concerned about becoming the animal; really getting into it's head as well as it's skin, but Seth has shown me that that's not as necessary as I believed. He retains much of his own mass when he changes, which is why it hurt when he landed on you; I should have warned you. He's still small like a squirrel, but he's too heavy to be carried off by a predator. He also keeps his own thoughts so he's fully Seth in his thinking. It's more like he moves into the squirrel and takes over. Like a shared experience. It reminds me of the legend you told me about the wolf and how your people agreed to share the body of the wolf. I think that's what I was missing! That's probably why it's so easy for you since you've already understood from the beginning. So when I change into a bear, I have always become the bear when what I should be doing is sharing the form of the bear so we are both better! There is such a spiritual aspect to this I never understood. There's a choice of how much of yourself you want to give over to the animal, and I've almost given myself entirely when it's not necessary! It makes me a pretty fierce bear, but not a very good man. In fact I think I've come closer with some of the other animals which might explain why you like the fox so much." He grinned at me. "Maybe if we learn more about how much of ourselves we carry into the change we might prevent accidents like the one that hurt you so bad."
Mom called and we hurried back to the house for dinner with Kyle insisting on carrying me since it was already dark and the ground was freezing again. After dinner I did the dishes and cleaned the kitchen. Kyle came in to help me and it made me so happy to think that I would get to spend my life with him just doing normal things like drying dishes and putting away leftovers.
When bedtime came I was tired and regretted that Kyle would be sleeping in Seth's room again. It didn't take me long to fall asleep, curled up in a ball like I would as a wolf. First thing in the morning Mom had me up and getting ready. We made breakfast for everyone and I helped Seth clean out the Jeep so we would have room for whatever we bought. When we left we went by to pick up Emily and I was surprised how excited I was to spend time with her.
She was on her way out the door when we pulled up and I saw her kiss Sam goodbye. I waved and he scowled as I got out of the front seat and slipped into the back. "You didn't have to give up your seat for me." she protested as she sat down next to Mom.
"No problem Em, I've heard about pregnancy and the circulation issues. Besides Mom will be able to see if you're getting tired and need a break." I stretched out in the backseat where I had plenty of room. Mom was true to her word and we pretty much shopped til we dropped. Emily wasn't kidding either when she said she needed to take many breaks. From store to mall we got good at finding the restrooms right from the start. Strangely I was more interested in shopping for Emily's baby than I was for my own wedding. I found a couple cute outfits and several toys I bought for her and she had to talk me out of even more. Mom had to force me to find a pair of white shoes for the celebration after the wedding and I picked the first ones she suggested that fit. I was also on the lookout for gifts for several people on our list and Mom was finding a lot of them as well as items to wrap them in.
As the day went on Emily gradually relaxed and warmed up to me until by lunch time we were laughing at any excuse. Mom had an agenda and she moved us along, but we were more interested in hanging out and being silly than shopping. I did make one trip through an antiques store for gifts for the Cullen family, remembering that they were from a different time I tried to find what they might like. I became the designated bag holder and I found myself looking like a display rack with so many bags draped on my arms. By the time we were heading back home the car was full of bags and Emily and I were both in the backseat cracking jokes and cutting up. Mom had the passenger seat loaded down with more bags and we stopped for dinner out. Before we left we ordered take-out for the guys. The day was successful and we'd crossed much of our list off. Mom stopped at Forks to pick up my outfit from the dry cleaners and we drove to drop Emily off. I had to help her carry her bags in since she'd found a few nursery items for the baby as well as what I'd bought her. Sam wasn't home so I didn't have to deal with any uncomfortable moments. I let Emily know that she was invited to drop by any time while I was home. I kissed her cheek and promised I'd never let anything stupid ruin our friendship again.
When we got home the house was dark. Kyle and Seth weren't home and we started carrying in bags without them. Just as soon as we were finished unloading everything from the car they came walking out of the woods. We all went into the house and they were grateful we'd brought back food. There wasn't even time for talking between bites as they devoured everything and went to the fridge for more. "Sorry Leah," Kyle apologized. "We missed lunch and dinner; it's been a very eventful day!"
As soon as they were fed they told us all about how they had been with both packs all day, demonstrating the new aspects of shape shifting. Kyle was amazed that all but a couple of the youngest pack members had been able to change into something other than a wolf the first day. I was sorry I'd missed it since the animals they chose were more varied than he expected as well. Seth had the chance to demonstrate his squirrel and prove that it was a good animal to have around even in a conflict. Apparently the little rodent's teeth could gnaw through even supernaturally strong skin. Jacob did the one that surprised me most; becoming a large black stallion since Renesmee was into horses and horse books. He hoped he'd be able to give her rides since most normal animals would get spooked when Edward or Bella came near, and they weren't all that sure of Nessie either. Sam also chose a surprising animal, and he changed into a sea lion. I never knew he'd had an interest in them before. He also noted that he wouldn't be able to hurt Emily or the baby if he changed into something without claws.
Jacob learned even faster than I did, since after he'd gotten used to the stallion he also learned to change into a spotted owl. Paul changed into a black bear and Quil changed into a bobcat. Embry changed into a California condor which surprised me since there weren't any near us. As they told us about the different changes, it seemed clear that Jacob was emerging as the overall pack leader. Even Sam's pack showed special deference to Jacob and I was wondering if he would soon reunite the two packs, especially since Sam would soon have a baby to take care of. I asked if there had been any problems for Kyle and his alpha rage, but they both agreed everyone had been pleasant.
The next three days were busy for me, helping Mom prepare and plan, but Kyle was left on his own and he spent a lot of time with the wolves of both packs. At the end of the day he would tell me what each of the members were up to, and in the three days they were each able to choose a different form. I was a little jealous because I wasn't able to go off and practice my own changes. I also missed having Kyle around during the day. Emily did manage to come by and she confessed she was excited about Sam being able to change into different animals. Ever since the accident that had left her scarred she had been afraid of the wolf. She'd always wanted to be far away when he changed, but the night before he'd become a raven on the front porch and she was even able to let him perch on her arm.
She also let me know that she and Sam were planning on leaving right after my wedding to go away for a romantic Valentine's Day weekend. "So don't be surprised if you see us leave early; it's not you." I again apologized for leaving her wedding early even though she assured me that most of the guests didn't notice. I waited for the pang of envy that her romantic news would have brought me less than a year ago, but it didn't happen. Instead all I felt was happy for her.
The Thursday before the wedding Kyle was flying back to Alaska to pick up his sister and her two youngest children. I was excited to be able to see Ahnah and Akiak again as well as his sister Lora. He had a friend from his flying club agree to come and pick them up the Sunday after the wedding. I had too many things to wrap up for the wedding so I was staying behind for the trip. Instead Seth was going in my place since it was never a good idea to fly alone. I hated letting him go without me, but I kissed him goodbye and waved as he took off with a grinning Seth beside him. I was extremely grateful that all the weather reports were favorable both for the trip and the wedding on Saturday.
Mom and I spent the day decorating the community center for the potlatch/reception. The more I thought about it the more I realized my simple wedding was turning into quite a celebration. Every time I ran into someone out and about they would tell me how they were expecting to see me on Saturday. Mom was preparing enough food for well over a hundred and fifty guests, and I know we had boxes full of gifts for everyone who would attend. I had the final fitting for my dress and I was so overwhelmed with how well it turned out I almost cried.
It seemed everything was in place and almost ready to go except the people. I waited eagerly for Kyle to return late in the afternoon. Mom drove us to the airstrip since the Cullen's borrowed truck wouldn't hold everyone on the way back home. As soon as he got out of the plane I ran to him and held him tight. As soon as I looked at his face I realized something was wrong. I did a quick check of everyone there and no one was missing. "Kyle what's wrong?" I asked as quietly as I could.
"We have a little unforeseeable problem that came up. Let's get everything unloaded and we'll sort it out, okay?" I helped unload the suitcases from the plane and introduced Lora to my mom. They seemed to warm to each other right away and I was wondering what kind of trouble Kyle was talking about. We loaded suitcases into the back of the truck and Kyle went through all the post flight procedures before he pulled the plane into the hangar. Everyone seemed to have had a good flight and I still hadn't seen what Kyle was so concerned about.
For the trip home I thought that Kyle would drive with Lora and Ahnah and we'd take Akiak with Mom and me so he and Seth could keep each other company. But Seth surprised me, instead almost pleading for Ahnah to come with us instead. I wondered if the two boys had had some kind of disagreement until I noticed the attention Seth paid Ahnah. He watched her every move and never seemed to be more than a couple feet away from her. I immediately looked to Kyle and his eyes told me everything without saying a word; my little brother Seth had imprinted on Kyle's niece Ahnah!
I didn't argue over the arrangements, but I forced Seth to sit in front with Mom, and I sat in back with Ahnah to talk with her and find out if she had any idea what was going on. She was such a sweet and pleasant girl it was hard to see if she was just being polite to Seth or showing interest. Then she asked me about the necklace and I told her I was indeed planning to wear it. "Don't forget I want it back!" She reminded me. "Someday I want to wear it at my own wedding!" she smiled and her eyes briefly went to Seth before she looked away shyly. She knew! I was stunned, Seth hadn't even had a first girlfriend and now he had chosen the one who would be his wife! I hoped that Mom would be so busy with the wedding that she wouldn't notice. I was trying to wrap my mind around the problem of the distance that separated them, not to mention the problem of them both being so young!
Once we got back home I was overwhelmed with trying to find space for everyone. Mom had it figured out in a second; She and I would share her room for the short time they would be there. Ahnah would sleep with her mom in my room, and Akiak would share Seth's room with him. It left Kyle on the couch, but he was fine with the arrangement. I wanted desperately to spend some time alone with Kyle, so we volunteered to drive into town to pick up pizza and bring it back for dinner.
In the truck I held his hand as we took the familiar roads into Forks. "I'm sorry Kyle, I had no idea that something like this could happen!" He looked serious as he watched the road ahead, holding my hand. I was beginning to wish we'd slipped off to Vegas like we'd joked about. He was quiet and I couldn't tell what was going through his mind. "Kyle? Talk to me, you're scaring me."
He let out a deep breath and glanced my way. "I'm sorry Leah, this just took me by surprise. I've been very protective of my sister's children and strangely I feel the same way toward Seth. Being around him this past week has been like having a little brother, and sometimes a son. But when he first set eyes on Ahnah, I saw this look come over him and I recognized it almost immediately. It was how I felt when I first saw you! Part of me wanted to separate them and hope I could undo it; and another part wanted to move mountains to clear the way for them! This is crazy, she's only sixteen! And the whole way to Alaska I was talking to Seth about his plans for college. I know the only thing he can think about is her right now, but he graduates next year and I don't want to see him cripple his future because he can't think beyond a girl! Oh Leah, does that make me sound like a hypocrite?"
I laughed. "It makes you sound like someone who cares a lot about two young people with a lot of decisions to make. Well, on the bright side, so far this imprinting thing hasn't been wrong yet. Sam and Emily are happy, Jared and Kim seem to be good for each other, Jacob and Nessie are going to unite us all in a way we never would have thought possible, Rachel is smoothing off Paul's rough edges, and he's brought her home more often, and even Quil and Claire don't seem to be minding at all. And of course I know that I'm happier with you than I could ever be with anyone else! As far as I'm concerned it's the best thing that could have happened to me! It seems wrong to want to deny Seth the kind of love and happiness I've found. I only wish it had been a few years later."
"Well, as long as we're looking on the bright side; at least with them both so young they haven't had a chance to go out and get engaged to other people before it happened. How nice would that be to know you can skip all the dating and frog kissing just to find the perfect person to spend your life with; they have already found them! I just don't know what to do about the distance between them. I know if it was you living so far away I'd go crazy wanting to be with you. I've been thinking that maybe Seth can come and stay with us for spring break. It won't exactly be the extended honeymoon you wanted, but something tells me he won't spend much time hanging around our house!"
"And maybe Ahnah can go to La Push for the summer? I don't even know, do the home school kids follow the normal school calendar? I think maybe we're going to need to be creative and find a way to get them together without letting them....run off together."
"That's a good point Leah, I'd almost forgotten Ahnah is home schooled! Lora keeps telling me how far ahead they are compared with public school kids. What if we try getting them to the same college in a year? I'm sure she could get admitted even if she's a year younger. Find a way to make them wait four years before they get married."
"Good luck on that one Kyle; can you imagine waiting four years before we could get married? I like the idea of trying to get them both off to college before they get married, but if they feel what we feel, why wait?" I was trying to wrap my mind around the idea that my baby brother was in love; seriously in love!
"I just don't know what I'm going to tell my sister. She only knows that I'm different. Now she's going to have to understand that her daughter is going to be involved with someone like me. I don't even know how Ahnah feels about Seth. They only had a little bit of time to spend together before we left, but she rode to the airstrip beside him, and they just seemed to hit it off right away. I almost felt sorry for Akiak since he and Set are the same age and yet Seth barely had two words for him!"
We pulled in to the pizza place and ordered four pizzas along with breadsticks and a couple salads just in case. The trip back home went fast, with the smell of pizza permeating the air. I chatted about some of the wedding plans that I needed him to know about. I tried to get him to tell me about the plans for our honeymoon but he insisted that it stay a surprise. "I've never been there myself, but I've always wanted to go; this will be a perfect opportunity to share it with you."
As we found places to set the food I noticed that he had his camera with him. I'd seen him on occasion with it slung around his neck, and I was wondering if he brought it more for the honeymoon or for the visit to La Push and the wedding. Whenever I asked him what kind of pictures he was taking he would only smile. "I've got a lot of film, and as soon as we get home and get the pictures developed I'll be happy to show you everything. He didn't take any pictures indoors, but whenever he went outside he had it in a case slung over his shoulder.
Once we got back we both observed Seth and Ahnah. He dug into the pizza immediately, pulling out the best pieces, then handed the plate to her with a grin. I looked at Kyle and whispered, "he's got it bad, Seth never lets anything get between him and food!" It took a comment from Lora to Mom about how sweet Seth was being to get her suspicions going. Soon there were three of us watching Seth as he pulled out a chair for Ahnah and ran to get her something to drink and napkins. We were so caught up in Seth's behavior I almost didn't notice Akiak serve himself a huge plateful of pizza with breadsticks balancing precariously on the top. Now there was Seth's appetite! He stood by the counter eating pizza like he'd never eaten before.
Before it was too late I served Kyle and myself and noticed that Mom and Lora were enjoying the salads. I took Kyle into the living room and we sat in front of the fireplace. "I think we may have another problem," I whispered. He looked at me alarmed and I was quick to let him know that I wasn't sure, but we might keep an eye out. "Akiak looks like he's starving, and I know you said everyone ate before the trip. He also had a sandwich before we left to get the pizza. I know he's a big guy, I remember thinking he reminded me of what you must have looked like at that age when I first saw him. But he looks like he's grown since I saw him three weeks ago! And that appetite reminds me of what happens before we change!" I shrugged my shoulders. "Or it could just be that he doesn't get pizza very often and he's enjoying it while he can; with teenagers you never really know!" I was sorry I'd said anything when I saw the worried look on Kyle's face.
"It doesn't make sense for Akiak to change. He's not had any exposure to vampires or anything like that! I mean unless one of them came to the village while I've been gone. Lora didn't mention any murders, and I'm sure she would have told me if anyone came up missing. Why would he change Leah?" I had no answer for him and we both sat by the fire in silence.
"Kyle, what if we are his catalyst?" I kept my voice the barest of whispers but he still snapped his head to look at me as if I'd shouted. "What if we've been blaming the wrong people for all the changes? I mean, it makes sense to change when an enemy like a vampire threatens us, but would everyone need the same exposure to change? Or would it move through the tribe like a domino affect? I never even thought about it since there were so many vampires around when our tribe changed. But even the Volturi vampires didn't come through La Push; while the wolves came home every day!" I was starting to get a sick feeling in my stomach and the acidic pizza wasn't helping. I set the food aside and put my arms around Kyle as he looked a little sick himself. "I'm sorry Kyle, we didn't know, and maybe I'm wrong about the whole thing and he's just hungry."
Seth and Ahnah came through the room wearing coats and hats. "We're just going for a walk to take care of the pizza we ate." Seth mumbled in embarrassment. It was a flimsy excuse, but we all watched them leave with their fingers barely touching, like they wanted to hold hands but didn't want to be obvious. Not even a minute after they left there were four sets of eyes watching them through the windows. They didn't even make it out of sight of the house before their two silhouettes were embracing in the pale moonlight. I heard Kyle groan as he stepped back from the window. Mom and Lora came in and we stood there looking at each other wondering what to do, while Akiak finished off a pizza in the kitchen oblivious to the dilemma.
"Okay Leah, looks like a little chaperoning is in order." Kyle looked at me and we put on our coats for appearances sake and slipped outside to follow the two. We walked slowly, understanding all too well how desperate their need would feel to be together; preferably alone. We wouldn't have caught up to them so easily except they would stop every few minutes to kiss or hug and Seth's ears were more attuned to the sounds our footsteps made along the gravel road. When they stopped to wait for us they had their arms around each other, boldly exposing their feelings. It took me a second to realize Kyle and I were walking the same way, hip to hip with arms around each other. "Let's just keep on walking you two, I think we need to find a place where we can talk, don't you think?"
We followed them up the road, well out of sight of the house. I couldn't help but notice the way Ahnah would rest her head against Seth's shoulder and he would turn to kiss the top of her head. It was too familiar and I was having trouble wrapping my mind around the idea that my baby brother was behaving toward Ahnah like Kyle did to me! About a mile up the road I took the lead and we left the road to walk through an overgrown pasture to an unused horse barn. With the doors falling off and a hole in the roof it was clearly abandoned. But it was dark and quiet inside and we wouldn't be interrupted.
Inside we sat down on some overturned feeding troughs; Kyle and me on one facing Seth and Ahnah on another. We sat there eye to eye for a few minutes and Ahnah was the only one who seemed even a little bit confused, even with Seth's arm tight around her. "Ahnah," I began uncomfortably. "Do you have any idea why we followed you?" I was nervous and Kyle squeezed my hand.
"I guess you wanted to make sure we didn't go off to....make out or something. Mom knows I've never had a boyfriend, so I thought she would trust me more!" She sounded a little more hurt and confused than I expected.
I wanted to calm her fears because they were quickly reflected in Seth. "No Sweetheart, it's not your mom who had us come out. She doesn't understand what's going on here any more than you do. You haven't done anything wrong and you're not in any trouble." I took a deep breath and went on. "I know how you must feel having a good looking young man suddenly pay so much attention to you." I felt Kyle put his arm around me and I looked up to see the ghost of a smile on his face. "The same thing happened to me when I met Kyle. But we are a little bit older than you two so we didn't have to contend with family being concerned about our futures." I saw her confusion when I mentioned the future and I hurried to explain. "Ahnah, when Kyle first saw me, he fell in love with me; hard! I didn't have to say or do anything, it was almost like his spirit recognized mine as it's perfect match and an instant bond formed." She looked at Kyle, and Seth looked at me. "In our tribe we've seen this happen a few different times, and we call it imprinting. It's like when a baby bird sees it's mother for the first time and will follow her anywhere." I let this sink in. "But for us this imprinting is much stronger than a baby bird to it's mother; it's more like...." I looked at Kyle for guidance. "....two halves of a whole finally coming together. For those who imprint it's such a strong bond of love that nothing else in the world is more important!" I looked at Ahnah and I could see that she understood that Kyle had imprinted on me, but she still didn't get that Seth had done so with her.
"How does that sound to you Ahnah? To have someone love you even more than their own life? To want to become everything you would ever want in a mate, and make your every need their priority? How do you think that would feel? How do you think you would handle becoming the center of someone's universe? To know that every choice you make affects them as well? To know that when you're away from them for long, they suffer? To know that for you the search for the right guy is over since no one could ever come close to the one who loves you so completely? How would you feel to have that Ahnah?"
She didn't notice Seth watching her, but she smiled at me and answered immediately. "I think that sounds wonderful! I haven't had a boyfriend yet because no one who's been interested in me has ever made me feel like that; and I want that! I didn't even know it was possible until I saw Kyle with you. I know Mom and Dad don't have that with each other, and I made up my mind a long time ago that I wouldn't settle for someone who....didn't love me enough to do what's best for us both." I could see the tears in her eyes and Seth's almost panicked need to comfort her as he dried her eyes on his sleeve and pulled her closer. I watched them with a lump in my throat; why did they have to be so young!
I took another deep breath and decided I'd let the other shoe fall. "Seth, why don't you tell Ahnah how you feel. Don't be embarrassed because we're here; she needs you to be honest."
As soon as she turned to look at him the hole in the roof allowed the moonlight to spill over her pretty face. Seth seemed almost overwhelmed with her beauty, and he just stared for several moments, holding her hands and gazing into her eyes. "I think you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life! When I first saw you outside your house in Alaska I thought I was seeing an angel, but one dressed in white fur and with no wings! Ahnah....even saying your name makes my heart beat faster and being next to you I can forget about everything else. And it's not just because you're so pretty; don't think that please! It's just....you! I feel like I know you already and I just need to be reminded that you don't like pepperoni on your pizza, or that you're really good at math, or that your eyes have a little touch of green in them in the sunlight. I want to be with you. I can't stand the thought of you leaving after the wedding; I don't know what I'm going to do if I have to watch you leave without me!" He stopped talking and threw his arms around her, pulling her tight to him. With her head on his shoulder she had her eyes closed and a smile on her face as she wrapped her arms around him.
Kyle pulled me to him and whispered in my ear; "it doesn't look like she's putting up near the fight you did!" He helped me to my feet and we stepped away from them, slipping outside of the barn to give them a little privacy. If Seth was going to pledge undying, eternal love to Ahnah they both deserved to be alone. As soon as we were out of sight Kyle pulled me to him and kissed me. "You handled that so well, Leah! I probably would have warned them about lust and passion and gotten all off track."
"Oh don't worry, they need to hear that too! I just think they both need some time to let it sink in....five minutes should be enough, right?" I smiled up at him. "We need to lay out our ideas for their future before they go back and break the news to their moms. In four years this won't feel nearly so inappropriate; and they both need to think about their education. Oh Kyle it's like looking at a reflection of us! When did Seth get so mature?" I held him tight wondering how it was that I was now one of the responsible, adults. When we peeked in on them they weren't talking but were instead kissing with more intensity than we wanted to allow. I kicked the barn door and Kyle cleared his throat as we stepped back inside. They broke apart quickly but still held hands.
"Seth, did you get a chance to tell Ahnah about your....our secret?" Kyle asked as he sat down, making room for me beside him.
Seth looked suddenly guilty. "No, I didn't think about it. Do you think she needs to know?" He looked at us confused.
Kyle nodded. "Yes Seth, she needs to know." I said gently. You can't plan a future with someone if you don't know the important facts about their life. And I assume you are planning a future together?" They looked at each other and smiled; yep, it's a done deal.
Kyle spoke up. "I think I can tell this part better, since Ahnah knows me, and it's my secret as well." He looked at her with the kind of love a father might have for a daughter. "This is something you're going to have to keep secret along with us. Your mom knows already, at least a little bit. But not your dad, and the rest of the family doesn't really know the truth either." he sighed. "Ahnah, I'm not really your cousin. Your mom isn't my aunt, she's my sister. You don't have an Uncle Kyle off chasing polar bears in the arctic, there's only one Kyle, and it's me.
"I can still remember when you were born, you were such a tiny little thing. I made sure I came around a lot so you would know your Uncle Kyle. Your daddy was always so busy with the fishing boats and your other brothers and sisters were a lot for your mom to handle. I tried to take some of the load off of her so she could feed you or take a shower herself. You two youngest ones were my favorite since I got to spend more time with you. I remember when you got pneumonia and it wasn't possible to get you to a doctor. I came every day to help your mom with you and I gave you the necklace I'd made in an art class using a dental drill to carve it out of shells. I had to make up an old legend about ancestral protectors so you would believe you were going to get better. Another child with the same illness in the village died the week before and we were scared we'd lose you too. You're the reason I got my pilot's license. I couldn't stand the thought that no one could get you to a doctor and I was going to make sure if it happened again there would be no reason to just keep you home and watch you suffer.
"I want you to understand that I am your uncle because you need to know why I don't seem to age. It's the reason the rest of the family has nothing to do with me, except for your mom. Ahnah, it's what the three of us here are, Seth and Leah too. We're shape shifters. We can change into different animals and we don't age normally after we start changing. Seth will continue to age until he's fully an adult, but then he won't get any older." We all sat and waited for her reaction.
She smiled up at Kyle. "Is that why the old people in the village call you Keelut Uncle Kyle? I always thought that was so mean of them, but it explains a lot. I didn't understand how you could look exactly like Uncle Kyle and still be his son. And we never saw the two of you together. And there was never a mother for cousin Kyle or a wife for Uncle Kyle. And the ages never added up since cousin Kyle showed up several years ago, but Uncle Kyle is younger than Mom. So how is it that his son would be so much older than me?" She looked like she was happy to have it explained to her, but then she looked at us all. "What the heck is a shape-shifter?"
Seth groaned and Kyle stood up. He stepped behind one of the horse stalls in the barn and we watched him as he undressed but we could only see him from the chest up. "Don't get excited Ahnah, but I'm going to show you exactly what we can do. Just remember it's still me and I won't hurt you. I've been like this for twenty-five years and it's only when Leah found me that I realized that there were more like me. He looked around to make sure he had room to change, then we all saw him almost explode outward into his grizzly bear form. Ahnah cut short a scream as she stared at the bear lumbering out of the horse stall. He came to me and I stood up and wrapped my arms around his neck and scratched him behind his ears.
"This is still Kyle, and this is only one of the forms he can take. He just happens to really like the bear. I can change too, and so can Seth." I watched her as her huge eyes followed Kyle as he paced in the small space. "Many of the young men in our tribe have gone through a change like this, and I'm the only woman so far who's changed. You need to know that now since Seth has imprinted on you. We sometimes change accidentally if there's a lot of danger, anger or stress. If you were standing too close during a change of that sort you could get hurt." She pulled her eyes away from Kyle and looked at Seth.
"You can do that too?" She asked with a sense of wonder. He smiled at her and nodded.
"I can change into a wolf, a squirrel, a hawk, and a caribou." he stated proudly. I looked at him amazed. He had been practicing!
"Can you show me?" she asked sweetly. And Seth almost tripped over himself getting up in a hurry to take Kyle's place and prepare for his change. When he changed the enormous wolf leaped over the low wall and landed beside her. She jumped up with a squeal of delight and timidly reached her hand out to touch him. Seth nuzzled her hand, then moved closer to lick her face as she giggled. "Isn't he adorable, Leah? Can you do this too?" I smiled and stepped behind the barrier too. In seconds I flapped up to the top of the wall and she was looking up at a huge eagle. "This is amazing! I can see why it's got to be a secret; no one would ever believe me if I told them!"
'She's taking this better than I expected.' I was surprised to hear Kyle's thoughts in my head since now we were part of the same pack.
'I just hope she doesn't think it's a game. At first it might seem like a novelty having a boyfriend that can turn into a hundred and fifty pound squirrel, but just wait until their first fight, or let him destroy his clothes in a sudden change and it won't seem so cute!'
'You're always cute to me Leah! And if you want to destroy your clothes, that's fine with me too!' I could hear him laughing in my head and I spread my wings and squawked at him. 'Don't be like that, you know I love you!' The strange thing was, with him in my head I could feel the way he felt about me more than just the words. It was breathtaking in its intensity and I hopped down from the wall and changed back. I dressed quickly and joined Ahnah facing the wolf and the bear.
"Are you starting to get an idea of how big this is? What Seth feels for you isn't just a crush or puppy love." I looked pointedly at the wolf. "There's something about what we are that makes this happen. I don't know how you feel about Seth, but when it happened to Kyle I wasn't exactly on the same page. It took a little longer for me to fall for him and it was a pretty rough two days!" I grinned at him and he snorted.
"So you didn't feel this imprinting? He fell in love with you and you didn't love him back? How awful! Leah, I'm already in love with Seth! I want to be with him and I want to plan our future together!" I saw Kyle move behind the wall and a couple minutes later he sat astride the bench and wrapped his arms around me. "We haven't had a chance to talk about the future, but I'm not going to do anything without Seth! I can give up college and we can get married right away, and it doesn't matter where we live as long as we have each other!" Seth dove behind the barrier and the next second he was himself, looking over the wall.
"Ahnah, that's insane! You can't give up everything for me! Kyle, tell her she's crazy!" I watched him struggle into his clothes, then he came back and sat next to her trying to put on his shirt inside out. "Listen, I love you! I'm going to love you forever and I won't let you give up your whole future for me! I listened to you telling Kyle on the way here how much you wanted to be a doctor and help your tribe and village. And now you're talking about giving that up? No Way! Honey I want you to follow your dreams; I want to be there for you every step of the way. I'll go to college wherever you go, and I'll study right alongside you, and encourage you when you feel down, and I'll cheer you when you do well." He pulled her to him and I could tell she didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to think about the responsible reaction from Seth. "I'm desperately, deeply, hopelessly in love with you. And if all you really wanted to do with your life is....retreat somewhere with me and live like hermits then I'd be happy to do just that. But before you knew how I felt about you, I saw the passion in your eyes when you spoke of your dreams, and it would break my heart if you gave that up for me. You don't have to give anything up just to be with me....except maybe dating other guys; that could be a bit of a problem."
I was so proud of my little brother I almost came to tears. Kyle looked at the two of them sitting so close they could have been joined at the hip and shook his head. "We need to make some plans, and by that I mean you two. You're not going to be able to hide this from your moms for much longer, and I think your mom already has a clue that this might be more than a crush, Seth. If you want them to take a hard line against you, just come back gushing about giving up college and not caring how you survive!" He looked pointedly at Ahnah and she looked embarrassed. The way we figure, you two have about a year before you can both head off to college. Seth graduates next year and Ahnah is at least a year ahead of kids in normal schools. So for a year you two are going to be spending time apart....or we will work something out.
He had their attention fully when he outlined his plan. "If you two can wait a year before you take any permanent steps....that means no elopements or babies heaven forbid! Then we'll see that you can spend as much time together as possible. Seth, you better start saving your money now, since an engagement ring might make her daddy feel a lot better about your intentions than just your ever present grin. And Ahnah you better continue to do well with your lessons. What I'm thinking will involve Seth coming to stay with us for a short time after we get back from....our honeymoon. Then Ahnah can come here for the summer. We have a friend who may be able to help you get a job at the hospital; which could help you out in your future medical career, so your mom might approve.
They agreed to our plans, knowing that we had their best interests at heart and understood how they felt. We finally stood up to go back home. "Seth, you better turn that shirt right side out unless you want this whole plan to fall apart." Kyle warned as he took my hand and helped me up off the low bench. When we got back Mom and Lora were both sitting on the couch laughing like old friends. When I looked around I didn't see Akiak and I asked where he went.