Julie was stretched out on the covers of her bed, trying to concentrate on her novel and not the mess she'd made of what ought to have been a perfectly uneventful summer. Did it really have to be Tim Riggins? Hadn't she already figured out that kissing Tim Riggins only led to humiliation and hangovers and parental shaming?

Moreover, could she possibly have found a more embarrassing way of dealing with the situation than running away? The thought of having to face him again made her stomach churn, and her imagination helpfully provided plenty of scenarios for her to consider. She wasn't sure which one was worse: the one where Tim laughed at her, chauvinist pig style, or the one where he acted like nothing had happened at all.

She was prevented from further recriminations by the sharp sound of two car horn blasts right outside the house. These were followed shortly by the front door opening and her mother's shouts.

"Jules! Jules, honey, come quick!"

Dropping her book, Julie was up and out of her bedroom in an instant, scared something was wrong. What she found instead as she came around the corner into the front hall was her mother hugging Tyra in the doorway.

"Tyra!" she shouted, running over. Beaming, her friend pulled away from Tami and enveloped Julie in a tight hug.

"What are you doing here?" Julie exclaimed, once they managed to let each other go.

"Decided to come for a visit," Tyra said, grinning. "My boss had to go to Dallas on business, so she said I could take Friday off. I left Austin at like six this morning."

"Do Mindy and your mom know? They're going to be so excited!"

"My mom knows, but I thought maybe you and I could go over there and surprise Mindy, see if we can't convince her to play hooky and come out with us tonight. Landry suggested Seven Senoritas."

"Landry, huh?" Julie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, Landry. Landry Clarke. He knows I'm in town and he's going to hang out with us a bit. Not the whole time, though. We'll need some girls-only time, obviously."

"Obviously."

"Mind if I steal her, Mrs. T?"

"No, you girls go right ahead! It's about time something got her out of the house besides school or work."

At this, Julie sent her mother a dirty look. Tami cleared her throat.

"I think Jules has to head over to the Rigginses' to babysit soon anyway, don't you, hon?"

"Ah yes," Tyra said, raising an eyebrow. "The babysitting gig."

"Don't start," Julie grumbled. "Let's go surprise Mindy before she wastes another pair of false eyelashes."

Tami and Tyra responded with eerily similar grimaces.

"Yeah, I'd really hate for her to get all dolled up for another unofficial Panther Booster Club event at The Landing Strip for nothing," Tyra said.

Julie grabbed her bag and they left in Tyra's old High Sierra, its rusted grill coated with dust and bugs from the highway. Tyra chattered the whole way about work and Austin while Julie listened, hard pressed to keep a grin off her face, she was so happy just to be in the company of her friend again. It felt like they were in high school again, on their way to the movies or to Tyra's place, or getting off a shift at Applebee's. Julie remembered the Friday they'd gotten paid and stopped at the tattoo parlour up on Murphy Street. Tyra had held Julie's hand, teasing her the whole time about "popping her tattoo cherry".

They arrived at the Rigginses', and Julie let them in with the spare key Tim had given her. They surprised Mindy in the middle of her beauty routine, her hair half up in hot rollers and half hanging around her shoulders. She screamed so loudly she woke Jordyn, who wailed miserably in the bedroom while Mindy jumped up and down, squeezing Tyra as hard as she could.

"Ty-ty!" she squealed. "What the hell are you doing here? You didn't get fired, did you? If you got fired, I swear to god, I will go down there and punch that bitch right in the fa-"

"Mindy!" Tyra interrupted, "I didn't get fired! My boss had to go to Dallas on business and there wasn't much for me to do without her in the office to order me around, so she gave me the day off. I drove up this morning."

"Yay!" Mindy exclaimed, clapping her hands and bouncing like a little girl who'd been offered a pony. "Oh my god, we're going to have so much fun!"

Smiling as the two sisters began planning a booze-filled weekend of partying, Julie went into the bedroom and picked Jordyn up, trying to console her. Not that Julie could begrudge the baby her sobs; she wasn't a huge fan of being awoken from a nap by hysterical screams, either.

"There's my girl!" Mindy said when Julie emerged from the bedroom with a sniffling Jordyn in her arms. Both sisters were seated on the couch. "Come see your Auntie Ty-ty!"

"Yeah, let me have a look at you," Tyra said, taking the baby from Julie. "Any tattoos yet, kiddo? Piercings?"

"Oh my god, don't you think she'd look totally adorable with pierced ears?" Mindy exclaimed.

"Mindy, maybe you should get her potty trained before you start punching holes in her," Tyra suggested, sending a withering glance in Julie's direction.

"Don't be stupid," Mindy replied. "Mom got our ears pierced when we were like two."

"If I remember correctly, Mom had iyour/i ears pierced when iyou/i were two, but mine were pierced when you decided that I was badly in need of a makeover."

"Whatever, Tyra," Mindy scoffed. "You looked fierce once the bleeding stopped."

"'You looked fierce once the bleeding stopped,'" Tyra repeated, her voice deadpan. "Just when I thought we'd never find the perfect Collette family motto."

"So," Julie interrupted briskly, hoping to avoid the imminent volley of sisterly jibes, "what's the plan?"

"Well, I'm sure as hell not going into work," Mindy said, tossing her damp hair over her shoulder. "I'll tell them I've got anthrax or something. Let's go pick up mom and go out for lunch. We'll pick up the boys when they get off work, and we'll all go to Seven Senoritas for dinner. Maybe without Mom, she's kind of a drag when she's drunk... Anyway, Jimmy, the bartender? He's one of my regulars and he'll totally give us free pitchers."

"Sounds like you've got a magical Dillon evening all planned," Tyra said sarcastically.

"Oh, shut up," Mindy said. "You love it and you know it, so don't be snotty. Let me go finish my hair and put on my face and we'll go get lunch."

Mindy hopped up and disappeared into the bathroom.

"Well," Julie said, raising her eyebrows at Tyra, "looks like we're in for an interesting night."

"No kidding," Tyra said. "You still have the fake ID I got you?"

"Yeah," Julie replied, "although it's probably coated with cobwebs at the back of a drawer somewhere. It didn't see a whole lot of action this year."

"I know. You've mentioned it once or twice. We'll make up for it tonight, okay? Although we will have to suffer the charming company of the Riggins brothers."

"Right," Julie said. Her heart sank at the prospect of facing Tim again after what happened the other night. Couldn't they just skip ahead to the part where it was all a distant memory?

It wasn't that Julie thought Tim would be weird about it; he'd certainly been nothing but discreet and understanding after she tried to kiss him the night of the Riley incident. No, it wasn't that at all.

The thing that scared Julie was that she had liked kissing him, really liked it. That wasn't something she'd expected. She'd always seen herself as being above the whole Tim Riggins hysteria that seemed to consume most of the girls and women of Dillon. After getting to know him better, she'd begun to appreciate his other, more subtle qualities as a friend. Apparently a little alcohol and loneliness went a long way in making a girl a tad more hysterical.

Now, Julie wasn't sure if she could make herself go back to the tentative friendship they'd been forming before they went and ruined the whole thing. Not after a kiss like that.

As she looked at Jordyn grinning happily as Tyra bounced her on her knee, she knew she'd have to try.

***

Tim shook his head in disdain as one of the truckers he and Billy were playing against pocketed the 8-ball for the third straight time. Billy shot him a disgruntled look, unhappy with Tim's insistence that they not hustle anyone tonight. Obviously they'd missed an easy mark.

It was past midnight, and they'd been playing pool for hours, preferring the game to the noisy table where their party had taken up residence. Angela had agreed to take Jordyn for the night so they could all go out and have some fun, and Mindy was taking full advantage. Tim glanced over at the table; Tyra and Landry were nowhere to be seen, and Julie seemed to be trying to talk Mindy out of something. Probably another round of Screaming Orgasms, if Tim knew his sister-in-law at all.

Mindy leaned over to say something to Julie, who smiled before looking over at Tim, her eyes meeting his across the crowded bar. The smile fell from her face and she looked away.

"Think I'm gonna call it quits," Tim mumbled to Billy, putting his cue down on the table and picking up his beer. He left before Billy could respond, making his way across the bar. By the time he got to the table, the song had changed and Tyra and Landry were back from the dance floor. They were breathless and laughing, each nursing a beer poured from the now empty pitcher.

"Hey ladies, Lando," Tim said, standing by the table. "Y'all need a fresh pitcher?"

"Yes!" Mindy exclaimed, turning to glare at Julie. "At least someone around here has manners. Get us another pitcher, Timmy, please."

Julie gaped helplessly at Mindy, but Tyra intervened.

"Julie's right; I think you've had enough, Min," she said, "at least for now. You want a soda or something instead?"

"No! Let's get another round of shots!"

Tyra began arguing the merits of this particular plan with her sister, and Tim glanced again in Julie's direction. She was looking out over the dance floor, chewing her bottom lip. He took in the little stack of overturned shot glasses and her half-empty beer glass. Silently, he edged around to her side of the table. She didn't look up right away, so he cleared his throat to get her attention.

"Hey Tim," she said quietly, taking a sip of her beer to avoid looking up at him. "How's pool?"

"You wanna dance?"

"What?" Julie asked, although he knew she had heard his question.

"I said, do you wanna dance with me?"

"You dance?" Julie asked, her voice sliding towards mockery although her eyes were wide and nervous.

"Come on," Tim said, exasperated. He held his hand out. "Do you want to or not?"

"Sure," Julie muttered, putting her hand in his and standing up. He led her out onto the creaky wooden dance floor, all the way to the far side, away from their friends.

The song was a slow, sad country ballad, and as he took in Julie's bowed head and the tension in her posture, he wondered if he'd overplayed his hand. They swayed gently back and forth for all of thirty seconds before Tim became frustrated.

"Come here," he said, sliding his hand against her lower back and pulling her close. "You can't dance like you're carrying a big laundry basket or something."

Julie looked up, her face flushed and her eyes bright. She opened her mouth to say something, then shut it and took a step towards him, her face inches away from his chest. He could feel the heat of her breath through the worn cotton.

"Listen," he said softly against the side of her head, "I gotta ask you something. Why'd you come over to my place the other night?"

"I didn't have anywhere else to go," Julie replied, looking up at him uncertainly.

Tim nodded and looked away. As his eyes ran over the dancing couples surrounding them, he wondered if maybe she didn't have anywhere else to go tonight, either.

"I'm sorry about what happened," Julie said quietly, staring at his chest with a frown.

"You are?" Tim asked. Why was she apologising?

"Aren't you?"

"Not really," Tim replied. "I'm sorry if I scared you, but I'm not sorry it happened."

"You didn't scare me," Julie lied. "I just felt... I don't know. Surprised, I guess."

They fell silent, the music once again filling the space between them. Tim looked at Julie's downturned face, at the flush staining her cheeks. If he hadn't scared her, what made her take off like that? He couldn't figure her out.

"Think I'm gonna head home after this," Tim said, after a long pause.

"Oh," Julie replied, glancing back towards the table where everyone else was still sitting, drinking and laughing. Billy had joined them, and had apparently brought a fresh pitcher with him. "Aren't you gonna wait for -?"

"Nah, they're gonna drop Landry off and then they're all staying out at the Collettes'," he said. "I kinda... I dunno. It's awkward."

"Yeah," Julie nodded. "Um, my car's at your place."

"Huh?"

"My car. It's parked at your place. I came with Tyra and Mindy, so I left it there after we went out for lunch."

"Right," Tim said. "Well, if you wanna stay a while longer, that's fine; I'll drive you back whenever."

"No!" Julie said, shaking her head. "No, it's okay. I don't want to keep you. Let me just go say goodnight to Tyra."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," she replied, looking down. "I think I'm kinda over the whole bar thing right now."

"Yeah," he said, his chin touching the silky hair on the top of her head. His stomach clenched strangely as her breath brushed the bare skin of his neck. "I know what you mean."

***

Not a word passed between them the whole ride back to Tim's, the only sound in the truck the radio softly playing a country song. Julie stared out the window for most of the ride, watching the storefronts and houses pass. The drinks she'd had that evening left her body feeling languid, but her mind was still tense.

Julie looked at Tim across the cab of the truck. He didn't notice, too busy tapping his fingers on the steering wheel and taking the turn onto his street. She bit her lip.

Tim pulled into the driveway next to her car. He killed the engine, but made no move to get out of the truck.

"Thanks for the ride," Julie said, her voice breaking the silence. Tim turned to look at her. "And for the night out. I think I kinda needed that."

Tim didn't respond; he merely stared at her, his pupils darkening his eyes in the dim dashboard light. Julie felt herself blushing.

"So like I said, Billy and Mindy are staying at the Collettes'," Tim said.

"Yeah," Julie replied, her voice cracking. She cleared her throat. "I guess you're on your own tonight."

Tim blinked once at her, slowly, before breaking eye contact and glancing down, a smile quirking his lips. He suddenly reminded Julie of her grandmother's big marmalade tom cat, who used to like to stretch out on Julie's chest and purr and blink at her just like that when she visited, beguiling her so she wouldn't move him. Julie wasn't much of a cat person, but it always seemed to work.

"Yeah," Tim said, his eyes meeting hers again. "You wanna come in for a bit?"

Julie swallowed. She was uncertain whether that question was loaded, or whether she was merely overanalysing things.

"Sure," she replied, hoping she seemed more confident than she felt. She hopped out of the truck before she could see the look on his face.

They didn't say anything else as they walked up to the house and Tim let them in. As soon as they were inside, Julie slipped into the bathroom to collect herself. She was a little drunk, and she felt unbalanced, like she'd arrived in a foreign land where she didn't speak the language. After splashing water on her hot face, she stared at her reflection in the grungy mirror. The longer she looked, the less confident she felt, so she blew her bangs up out of her eyes and turned away, opening the door.

She nearly collided with Tim, who was standing only a couple feet away from the bathroom door. She looked up at him, raising an eyebrow.

"Do you make a habit of lurking when people are trying to use the bathroom?"

He shrugged. "Nightcap?"

Julie regarded him for a moment. He was totally inscrutable right now, his face completely blank, and she found it very irritating.

"Sure," she said, stalling. She wasn't certain exactly what she was trying to stall.

Tim turned and went into the kitchen, opening cupboards noisily. Running a nervous hand over her hair, Julie went into the living room and sat down on the couch. Tim appeared seconds later, carrying two shot glasses and a bottle of cheap tequila.

"That's a pretty serious nightcap," Julie said as Tim sat down next to her and set the shot glasses down on the coffee table. He poured out two shots, and pressed one glass into her hand.

"Cheers," he said merely, holding his glass up to hers and meeting her eyes.

"Cheers," Julie replied, looking down shyly.

"You have to look me in the eye," Tim scolded, still holding his drink out to her, "or else it doesn't count."

"Oh," Julie said. She lifted her eyes up to his, and their glasses met with a quiet clink.

"Cheers," Tim repeated, looking right at her.

"Cheers."

Julie knocked her shot back, grimacing as she placed it back down on the coffee table. Tim laughed at her expression.

"You don't like tequila?" he asked.

"I like tequila," Julie protested. "I'm just not used to drinking it by itself."

"You've got a lot to learn, Taylor," Tim teased, pouring another round.

"Oh, please," Julie replied, rolling her eyes and taking her glass again.

"Your turn," Tim said, holding his glass up.

"My turn?"

"To toast," he prompted.

"Oh. Um. Here's to... Friends. Old and new," Julie ventured, shrugging.

"To friends," Tim repeated, tapping his glass against hers.

They knocked back their shots, and Julie did a better job of not sputtering this time around.

"Too bad I don't have any limes," Tim said.

"I'm very disappointed in you," Julie replied, shaking her head in mock dismay.

"You want another?" he asked, already pouring two more shots.

"Are you trying to get me drunk, Tim Riggins?"

"Think I'm a bit late for that," Tim laughed. He handed her the shot, and they both drank.

Julie's head swam a little as she thumped the glass down on the table, trying to catch her breath. She glanced over at Tim. He wasn't laughing at her, but he was smiling, his eyes shining.

Summoning the same sudden courage which had once prompted her to kiss Matt in the middle of a crowded school corridor, Julie closed the space between them and kissed him. Tim responded after a brief pause, burying his hands in her long hair, tugging it free of its long ponytail.

Julie moved closer to him on the couch, awkwardly trying to twist her body around to kiss him properly. He tugged on her upper arms, pulling her into his lap.

There was nothing polite about the way Tim Riggins kissed. His mouth tasted sharp from the tequila and he slid his hands up her sides and her back, holding her body tightly to his.

Julie pulled away after several minutes, gasping to catch her breath. Tim rested his forehead against hers, doing the same.

"Listen, do you wanna...?" he trailed off, the rest of the question in his eyes. Julie knew now that his invitation earlier had been loaded. She blinked. No, she'd known that from the moment he asked.

It was almost definitely a terrible idea. But it was dark, and late, and the liquor made everything seem softer and warmer and safer, somehow. He ran a hand up her back, rubbing firmly between her shoulder blades. Julie closed her eyes and smiled faintly.

Most important of all, he was here, and he was not pushing her away.

"Yeah," she said quietly. "I do."

They stumbled their way to Tim's bedroom, collapsing breathless onto his unmade bed. A wrestling match ensued, but Julie eventually coaxed him into letting go of her long enough for her to yank her shirt over her head. He watched as she kicked her jeans across the room before reaching to remove her bra. Self-conscious, Julie peeled off the last of her clothes while blushing under Tim's watchful expression. She was glad it was dark, the room lit only by moonlight and the soft orange glow of the streetlights outside his window.

The sensation of his hand on her bare thigh made her breath catch in her throat. It had been so long since anyone had touched her. She could feel him watching her in the dark.

"Come here," she breathed, uncomfortable with the attention he was paying her. He glanced up at her, a question in his eyes, but she ignored it, falling backwards onto his pillows and pulling him with her.

Between kisses, Tim shucked off what clothes he wore, pulling away only when absolutely necessary. He turned and hung his head over the edge of the bed, rummaging around. Julie heard the familiar tear of foil as Tim found a condom, and she was relieved they didn't need to have a conversation about it. The less talking, the better, she thought as he rejoined her, sliding his hands up her thighs and nudging himself between them.

Julie realised how drunk she actually was when he pushed inside her, pressing his hips hard into hers. He ran his hands up the length of her arms, holding her hands over her head. Julie gasped, and black spots danced in front of her eyes.

Julie tried to remember how to breathe as Tim drew back his hips and thrust into her again. He let go of her hands, bracing his elbows on either side of her head. Julie reached out and held on to his arms as he rocked into her in long, slow thrusts, rolling her hips up to meet his.

"Damn, Jules," he groaned, his damp hair hanging down and obscuring his eyes.

Julie could only gasp in response, her nails digging into his biceps. She felt delirious, like all the air had gone out of the room. Tim changed the angle of his thrusts, cradling her head in his hands and gripping her hair.

"I can't," he mumbled against her neck, his whole body shuddering, "I'm not gonna-"

Her skin felt tight and hot, almost painful, like if she didn't find release right now, like immediately, she might actually die. Frantically, she grabbed his hand, sliding it between their bodies, pressing it against her. He found the right spot with his thumb and rubbed roughly, forcing her to come so sharply that she cried out in surprise.

Tim shifted his weight again and grabbed her hips, thrusting through her orgasm and drawing it out as he came. He groaned deeply and collapsed, his body a dead weight on hers as he panted brokenly.

Apparently it's been a while for him, too, Julie thought as she tried to slow the pounding of her heart.

He heaved an exhausted sigh, his mouth hot as he left a trail of lazy kisses across her collarbone. After a long pause, he pulled away from her and collapsed on the bed.

Julie felt a sense of calm wash over her, and she took several deep breaths, trying to force that relaxed feeling into every cell of her body. She stayed that way for several minutes, just staring up at the ceiling over Tim's bed and thinking of absolutely nothing at all.

Finally, she glanced over at Tim. His eyes were closed and his breathing was slow and even.

"Tim?" she asked, her voice very quiet. He didn't respond. She reached out a cautious finger and poked him in the arm, but still nothing. He was fast asleep.

Julie rolled over, looking back up at the ceiling. The calm feeling evaporated as quickly as it had arrived.

Her mind began working, suddenly imagining staying the night and waking up next to Tim in the morning. Just the thought made her feel sick. If there was one thing she could not deal with in a morning after, it was Tim's awkward wordlessness. Absolutely not.

She looked back over at him, sleeping soundly beside her. Examining his face in the half-light, all she could think about was the way his voice sounded, his breath hot against her neck, as he came.

Julie shivered, and a wave of hot panic rolled through her. She had to get out of here right now, before she did something even stupider than everything else she'd done lately.

Trying not to jostle the bed, Julie got up and began searching silently in the dark for her clothes. She dressed hastily, donning what clothes she could find and abandoning the rest. Leaving the room without a backwards glance, Julie snuck out the front door, locking it behind her with her spare house key.

Knowing she probably shouldn't be driving but too freaked out to even consider staying, Julie drove home through the back streets of Dillon at an absolute crawl. She held her breath the whole way, refusing to think about anything that had happened that night; never mind that her skin still tingled and her muscles ached.

Never mind that she could still smell Tim on her skin, and that unsteadied her worse than all the drinks she'd had that night. Every time she shifted to shoulder check, his scent followed her, and every time it made her want to turn her car around and head right back in his direction.

She had never felt more relieved to pull into the safety of her driveway.

"Hey hon," came her mother's voice from the living room the moment she stepped through the door. Julie had thought her parents would be asleep by now, but apparently they had stayed up to watch a late movie.

"Hey," she replied, hovering in the hallway, hoping to avoid a real conversation. She could only imagine how she must look. Her mother was sitting up in the chair, but her father had fallen asleep on the couch.

"Y'all have a fun time tonight?" Tami asked, leaning over the arm of her chair. Julie gulped, convinced that what she'd been up to was written all over her face.

"Yeah, we had a great time. I'm kinda tired, though, so I think I'm just gonna go to bed."

Tami regarded her for a moment before smiling tiredly. "I'm glad to hear that. You don't get out enough these days."

"I know, mom." Julie looked down at the floor, afraid to meet her mother's eyes.

"Okay," Tami said, turning back to the TV. "You tell Tyra to come say hey at me again before she heads back to Austin, please."

"Sure," Julie replied, heading quickly down the hallway. "Goodnight!"

Julie entered her bedroom and closed the door behind her. She leaned against the door, utterly still, until her heart stopped pounding. Her thoughts were racing.

What had happened? What had she done? What had they done?

This was the first time she'd ever been with anyone but Matt. The first time, too, that she'd ever been with someone she did not love.

She loved Matt. Yes, they had broken up. But they had been together for years, and she wasn't the kind of girl who just turned around and jumped into bed with someone who was supposed to be her friend, somebody who was technically sort of employing her right now.

Except that apparently she was.

On wobbly legs, she stripped off her clothing and kicked it towards her open closet, out of sight. She grabbed her bathrobe and headed to the bathroom, hoping her parents wouldn't find it completely bizarre that she was having a shower at 2 AM.

Her head throbbing, she stood under the hot water until she felt certain that she had washed away the beer, smoke, sweat, tequila, and completely unnerving iTim/i smell that had clung to her the whole way home.

Safely back in her bedroom, she changed into clean pyjamas and climbed into bed. She pulled the covers up to her chin and stared silently up at the glow-in-the-dark stars her mother had let her stick to her ceiling the summer they moved to Dillon.

She didn't fall asleep for a long time.