Chapter Four
For anyone else, a funeral would have dampened their hope, especially when it was a funeral for the person that they had known the longest in the entire town. There was a certain unease around Storybrooke, which Snow could understand, she was feeling it too to some extent.
If the Evil Queen turned saviour could be taken down then they had to be worried that the threat could return so Snow was incentivised to keep working on her plans to fix everything. To make sure that her daughter got to experience True Love.
Her latest idea involved spending two days working with Merida to obtain the precious waters that would at least let them talk to Regina and hopefully confirm that things were not as bad as she thought they were.
They were getting close but there was a problem, she didn't see Emma being in any state to make the most of the opportunity.
In the two days since the funeral, the saviour had succumbed to what could only be described as bottomless, ceaseless depression.
She barely reacted to things around her, her parents hope speeches did not penetrate her immeasurable sadness.
Archie tried on a couple occasions with similar results and they all agreed that there was one person who could help in the unfortunate absence of the one who could definitely get her to maintain eye contact with someone.
Henry Mills was currently sitting in his mother's old room, apparently not prepared to occupy the mansion again, not that there was any member of their family who would be willing to live in Regina's home without her.
Emma's new house remained unoccupied so the Charming family were once again living in close quarters but had never been so far away from each other.
Snow was pretty sure that she'd finally figured out what to say to convince him to help fix that, so she passed the couch from which Emma monotonously claimed not to be hungry and ascended the stairs.
As expected, Henry was laid out across the bed with his nose in a book, the only odd thing about the picture was that he apparently no longer felt the need to have music blasting through headphones as he studied.
Archie assured her that it was normal to temporarily lose the ability to enjoy things like that in grief and that everything was too fresh to be worrying about it just yet.
Emma was clearly in much worse shape anyway.
"Hey, Henry, are you okay?" Snow asked, coming to sit on the end of the bed.
Henry groaned as expected and threw the book down. He was firmly in the anger stage so Snow didn't take it too personally.
"I'm fine," Henry insisted, "Why is everyone so worried about how I am all the time?!"
"We're your family, it's what we do," Snow said firmly, "But…I am more worried about Emma right now."
Henry rolled his eyes, briefly looking at his book longingly before he asked, "Why?"
"She won't eat, she hasn't been sleeping for more than a couple of hours at a time and she barely reacts to anything that anyone says to her. She needs help."
Henry hunched his shoulders, "And you think that I want to help her?"
"Henry," Snow sighed, picturing the boy who had been so enamoured with his birth mother, the expression he was wearing now couldn't have been any more different, "I understand that you are angry, I know exactly what you're feeling."
"She wasn't your mom! Even if you tried to force her to be!" Henry exploded but Snow didn't back down.
Since becoming friends, the fact that Regina was once her stepmother was unspoken and after Hades' revelation, she had been hopeful that no one would ever mention it again.
It was easier to see Emma as in love with Regina and not think about the family tree that had gotten them there.
"Henry, please listen to me?" she asked gently and he nodded as he deflated into the pillow.
"When my mother died, I was devastated and when I discovered what happened…I was vengeful. You know what I did to Cora and I live with that guilt every day. I think that you know that hating Hades is pointless, so maybe you're directing your anger at Emma instead? But Emma is also your mom, I don't want you to regret anything."
Henry remained tense as he looked down at his lap, but he admitted on the verge of yet more tears, "I begged mom to tell her how she felt but she was so sure that Emma couldn't love her back. I could have just told her though and then…"
His breath hitched and Snow rushed to reassure him, "That wasn't your responsibility. It was a misunderstanding between two very stubborn women, a very tragic one, but it's no one's fault. Do you really think that Emma wouldn't have found another way if she knew what was going to happen to Regina?"
"Is this where you tell me that mom would want me to be nice to my mother?"
"Well…" Snow shrugged, "Would she?"
Henry sighed but nodded, "Did you ever notice the way that mom smiled at Emma? It was different, she looked…younger, lighter maybe? How didn't anyone notice that?"
In retrospect, SNow could see exactly what he meant. Being one of the few who ever saw Regina with Daniel, she couldn't believe that she had missed that, but she really had thought that it was friendship.
Of course, it all made far too much sense after everything had turned tragic.
"Did you notice before your mom told you?" Snow retorted.
"No," Henry huffed, "I thought that she was meant to be with Robin Hood. Pretty sure she only told me because she wanted me to stop making operations to get him back in town."
"Then don't you think you're being a little unfair to Emma? I know that what you saw on that boat was awful and I'm so sorry that you had to be there for that but Emma watched her True Love's heart crumble in front of her, she's…broken."
"And what can I do about that?" Henry asked.
"You are the strongest connection that she has to Regina and the thought of you hating her…I think it's too much for her. I'm not asking you to forgive her right now, just…think about it?"
Henry took a long moment to think about this and Snow had to assume that he was conjuring his mother's opinion on that statement.
"Has she eaten at all today?" Henry finally asked.
"I don't think that she had had much at all this week," Snow replied.
Henry determinedly pushed off the bed and approached the door, Snow following him unquestioningly.
By the time she reached the bottom step, her grandson was at the counter grabbing bread and whatever meat was most readily available.
There were plenty of trays of homemade dishes, mainly provided by Granny, but Snow could see wanting to start with something lighter. The suggestion of lasagna had just seemed to upset her further.
He sliced through the bread and then went to sit on the coffee table, casually eating the first half of the sandwich.
Holding the other out, he asked, "You hungry ma?"
Snow held her breath until her daughter sat up, looking distantly distant and dishevelled, but she still took the sandwich and silently nibbled at it.
Snow's heart soared at the sight as the front door opened and her husband came in, pausing to take in their daughter and grandson sharing a sandwich.
"What did you do?" he whispered in her ear.
"I reminded Henry what his mom would want him to do," Snow replied with a tired sigh.
S
For the first time since their return to Storybrooke, Emma was vaguely able to focus on something other than the absence of her True Love.
This all-consuming ache came with the fact that she wouldn't run into Regina Mills anywhere in town.
The images on the TV almost were coherent enough to follow the storyline but Emma was periodically looking over at the boy stretched out on the couch at her side. It was the closest that she had been to her son since the diner but there was no tension in his demeanour, no indication that he wanted to be literally anywhere else.
They had spent an hour or two slothed out since sharing the sandwich, which was followed by a glass of water, and Henry hadn't dashed away like she thought he would after Snow and Charming left the loft.
She could have just enjoyed the proximity to the person in town who reminded her so much of the one that they both lost.
Despite sharing no DNA, Emma could often swear that he resembled Regina strikingly, usually when it came to one of his snarky retorts or a particularly distinctive eye roll.
He was a living incarnation of the best parts of Regina Mills and a constant reminder that she really existed.
Could that really be enough now?
Naturally, this led her to remember something that she had failed to say during their last discussion.
As though the opportunity was liable to tumble away, Emma pulled herself up and said, "I'm sorry, Henry."
Her son stiffened looking at her with that dangerous glint in her eyes but it promptly fell away and Emma had to assume that her appearance was more than a little disarming for him.
She hadn't met a mirror since the funeral but it didn't take a strong imagination to put together what a lack of food, water, daylight or shower would culminate in.
It had to be pathetic enough to warrant some pity even from the boy she believed would hate her for the rest of her life.
He swiped up the remote to switch the TV off and he replied, "I'm sorry too ma."
"What are you apologising for? I'm the one who chose that bastard over…" Emma growled but her eyes widened at her own language. Hadn't Regina given her the memories that she needed not to make such stupid mistakes?
Apparently, Henry had no issue with her choice of descriptor for her ex, however, he turned to face her fully on the couch and replied, "You didn't know that you were making a choice. If mom told you how she felt, would you have gotten on that boat?"
It was exactly what her parents had been whispering to their despondent daughter, but coming from Henry, she almost believed that it wasn't her fault.
It wasn't quite enough to produce a smile from the saviour though.
"No absolutely not," Emma agreed, "I would have punched Hades in the face for even thinking about touching her."
"See," Henry said, "You didn't mean for this to happen. It sucks that she's gone and I don't know how it will ever not..suck…but it's not your fault. The only one to blame for all of this is Hades."
Emma blew out a breath, tempted to ask exactly what Snow had said to him to help his outlook mature so quickly, but there was something much more pertinent on her mind.
Her head flopped to the back of the couch and she asked, "How long did you know?"
"Just after Robin crossed the town line, she admitted that she didn't care about her soulmate leaving as much as she should have," Henry explained.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Emma huffed.
"It wasn't my thing to tell," Henry shrugged, "I figured that mom would tell you eventually, she was so brave when it came to everything else. But then things kept going downhill until we were…you know…in the Underworld."
"Have Belle and mom found a way back yet?" Emma asked hopefully, realising that she had been failing to listen to her parents' attempts to update her on their progress.
"Nope," Henry sighed, "Even if we could get back, it would still be a soul for a soul, right? Unless you mean Hook…"
"You know we can't do that," Emma said, deflating into the couch.
"I was thinking more…you know…" Emma said, pointing at herself and refusing eye contact with her son.
"If you did that I would just be here with another devastated mother. That's not the answer, ma."
Emma chewed at her lip and asked, "She really loves me that much?"
"She would have done anything for you," Henry replied.
Emma took a steadying breath and said, "It's kind of…intense having someone care about you that much."
"Trust me, you get used to it."
"Don't you miss it?" Emma asked.
Henry sniffed and fell against her, "I miss her."
Emma touched his hair, blinking away tears as she agreed, "Me too, kid."
She dropped her arm to bring him closer and was about to reach for the remote just as the door burst open.
Snow appeared, wearing a wide grin and clutching a phial of murky water.
"Merida found it," Snow announced and Emma leaned over to inspect the liquid as her mother bounded over to the couch, "This will let you talk to Regina!"
Emma reverently took the magical water holding it to her face.
There was no need to question why the queen of Dun Broch was currently absent, frankly, it was a miracle that she was helping the former Dark One at all. Besides, she had more important things to think about right now, like what she could possibly say to Regina Mills.
Something occurred to her, though, and she reluctantly handed the phial to Henry who was staring at it with the same reverence as she had been.
"You take it, Henry, you should talk to her," she said.
The boy continued to stare for a solid five seconds until he finally shook his head, "I told mom that I love her at least three times that day, there's no way that she doesn't know how much I care about her. I think you two have a lot to talk about," he said and the tinge of fear in his tone conjured images of the state that Hook had been in when they tried to summon him.
It was understandable that a son would want to avoid seeing his mother that way, but the question was, could the great and powerful saviour handle it?
"Are you…sure?" she asked apprehensively.
"Yeah," Henry replied, "Just tell her…I wish she was here?"
"I will," Emma promised, bringing him into a one-armed hug as she smiled appreciatively at her mother.
