A/N: The song they dance to in this chapter (and inspiration for the title of this fic) is So Close from Enchanted. Highly recommend if anyone has not seen it!


CHAPTER 2: DANCING LESSONS

In the three weeks after cake tasting, they fell back into a comfortable routine and the tension was less palpable. Of course, things would never be exactly the way they were which is why she was anxious walking up to his office. She knew the wedding would probably come up again in conversation and she worried it would mess up what they were just starting to find again. With one last deep breath, she knocked on his open door.

"Hi sir. Do you have a minute?"

"You're in luck, Carter. I now have five." He smiled emphatically dotting an "i" on the form in front of him before placing it in his outgoing bin. "What's up?"

She smiled back nervously and knew he picked up on it with the way he sat up a little straighter and fixed his eyes on her.

"Do you know when Daniel is supposed to be back?"

"Well after their little hiccup, the Prometheus was scheduled to be back tomorrow, but they had to make a pit stop so it won't be until Sunday."

"Oh…" her eyes drifted down to her fidgeting fingers.

"It sounds like he's fine, Carter. Nothing to worry about. Not like when you got stuck out there."

"Yes sir. It's not that I'm not worried about Daniel. It's just that before he was headed to Atlantis, he was supposed to do me a favor tomorrow and now I'm kind of in a bind because I didn't make a back up plan."

"Anything I can help you with? More wedding stuff?" He eyed her closely.

She hesitated before nodding. "Yes, sir."

"More cake?" he asked somewhat hopeful. His eyes lit up the way they always do when cake is involved. Damn this man could always make her smile.

"Dancing lessons. Pete can't make it this week and Daniel was going to be my partner. It's not a big deal. I'll probably just skip it."

"I'll go with you." Her eyes darted up to him as he ignored the blaring klaxons resounding in his ears.

"Sir, really you don't—"

"Carter, I'll always be your back up plan if you need one." His eyes were now soft and genuine.

"There will be music…and dancing."

"Hey, I like music. And I've been known to cut a rug or two back in the day. C'mon I bet you paid for all the lessons anyways."

"We did actually." With her bottom lip between her teeth, she thought about it for another minute. "Ok…if you're absolutely sure you won't mind, I'd really appreciate it sir."

"Think nothing of it. Just tell me when and where."


Several other couples mingled in the dance studio when Sam and Jack entered. They made their way to the seats against the back wall and watched as a few people warmed up showing off their progress to the others. Sam felt as out of place as she knew she looked.

"Pete's actually a really good dancer. I, on the other hand, have three left feet."

"I very much doubt that. I've sparred with you before. You have great footwork and excellent coordination. Dancing's not all that different."

"I guess I don't keep time with the music very well."

"I have a feeling your rhythm is just fine."

"Ok, everybody, let's get started!" Jack couldn't see the source of the authoritative voice until the crowd of couples started to part like the Red Sea as a tall brunette strolled to the middle of the studio. After a brief review of the previous lesson, the music started and most of the couples quickly started practicing.

"And who do we have here?" she asked as she made her way towards them. "I'm Vivian. And you are?"

"Uh, I'm with her." He pointed towards Sam and took a step closer placing his hand on the small of her back. Instant electricity surged through his body at the contact, and he hoped his face didn't betray how much touching her affected him.

"No Pete today?"

"Um, no, not tonight. He had to work. This is my, um..."

"Jack. Her Jack...I mean her friend, Jack," he corrected quickly.

"Well it's very nice to meet you, Jack. Let me know if you need any assistance."

"I think we can handle it," he replied flashing Sam his charming flyboy grin while motioning to towards the dance floor. "Shall we?"

Things started off a little rough. She was tense from the beginning and with each misstep she became even stiffer. They fumbled where to put their hands. He zigged, she zagged. She had already stepped on both of his feet a few times by the second dance.

"Ouch," Jack tried to muffle another grunt as his left foot got caught underneath hers again.

"Damnit. I'm sorry, sir," apologized Sam once again as they walked off the dance floor, Jack hobbling just slightly.

"It's fine, Carter. No sweat. Let's just take a little break and regroup before the next song." He took a seat in one of their chairs.

"I told you I'm not very good at this. I'm not very graceful."

"You're fine. You just need to let go…mentally."

"Are you telling me I'm overthinking it?"

"You overthinking? Never," he joked with a slight shoulder nudge. "You just need to stop trying to control each movement at every moment. Dancing is about feeling. Also you need to work with me here. Remember we're dancing with each other."

"Easier said than done, sir."

"You know you don't have to do this if you don't want to right? Most people just slow dance and sway a little."

"Pete wants to do a big first dance. It'll be nice you know?"

Jack looked at the unsureness in her face and sighed silently. The current music ended and everyone was gathering again for the next song.

"Ok, Carter. Let's do this right then." He rose from the chair and offered his hand.

"Sir?"

"May I?" he asked now with a twinkle in his eye. On its own volition, her hand found his, and they walked back to the center of the dance floor as the music started to play.

"Do you trust me?"

Sam swallowed hard at his closeness and nodded. With his left hand still holding hers, he confidently secured his right hand behind her shoulder blade.

"Don't think. Just focus on me," he whispered.

As the words started, Jack guided Sam through a box step in perfect rhythm with the music. Their bodies moved in unison as they glided around the dance floor. His eyes were locked with hers only breaking contact when he spun her. When she still looked unsure of herself, he smiled reassuringly and squeezed her hand to keep her grounded to him. Eventually, the rest of the room faded away and it was just the two of them.

As they moved, Jack couldn't help but think about how they've danced around their feelings for all these years. He'd always followed her lead which is why they decided to leave it in that room. He knew things shifted between them after the za'tarc testing incident even though they both said they were ok with it. She started to pull away after the mind stamp and even further after he shot her twice. It was subtle—he didn't notice it as it was happening—but little by little the distance between them grew until one day he found her humming in the elevator; and ever since then, he'd been left to wonder how he lost her heart.

Deep down he knew. Although they had perfected the art of silent communication—saying what couldn't be spoken with just a look or a touch—he also understood that sometimes just knowing isn't enough. He isn't enough. And that's why she moved on.

It was better this way. She deserved to be shown every day how loved she is and told how wonderful she is—how the brilliance of her smile rivaled the brightest star in the sky, how the depths of her eyes are unmatched by the deepest sea, and how although her mind is a modern marvel, her heart is the most beautiful and amazing thing about her.

His heart dropped under the weight of regret, but he shook it off quickly and refocused on her. If this was as close to a wedding dance as he was going to get with her, then he wanted to memorize every second, every look, every touch.

"So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this one's not pretend
And now you're beside me,
And look how far we've come
So far, we are so close"

Her body relaxed into his and they moved in graceful fluid motions. Sam smiled as the tempo picked up in the musical interlude which drew out a rare full out grin from Jack. She was actually having fun. It felt so natural to follow his lead. Her hands and feet automatically followed his in sync and soon she could anticipate when he was going to twirl her or change positions.

While they danced, Jack looked at her with such openness that she couldn't help but to stare back getting a rare glimpse to the emotions beneath. It was brief, but she saw the flash of regret because she knew it all too well—the feeling that they would never get their chance.

After they had to openly admit their feelings, there was still so much work left to do. SG-1 was too important. They couldn't risk that. But then it became obvious that theirs was a story of loss. One that seemed like it was never meant to be. The tighter they held on to the dream of them, the more hurt followed—when they lost Jonah and Thera, when he was forced to take the second shot, when she pleaded with him to blend with Kanan and he ended up captured by—she stopped herself there.

It was better this way. He had endured more than any one should ever have to in one lifetime and given more of himself than most people would ever know. He deserved the simplicity he craved and the peace he fought for, not the pain that inevitably comes with the two of them. So she let go and the fantasy of them had faded. But dancing with him now, she realized it wasn't gone, not completely, and he was still all she really wanted but was no closer to having.

She pulled herself back from the memories of loss and thoughts of what ifs. As the music slowed, he pulled her close and held her against his body willing time to stand still. They could give themselves tonight she decided. They'd earned that much at least. One night to dance. One night to pretend. One night to dream. To dream about a future with—

"—with Pete!" Vivian's voice pierced through her musing.

"Huh?"

"I said 'that was excellent, Sam! I can't wait to see your progress next week with Pete.'"

As if on cue, Jack stepped back and dropped his hands from her. She immediately missed his warmth.

"Pete. Right."


Jack laid in bed but he knew sleep wasn't coming any time soon. The rest of the class had gone just fine. Once Sam got out of her own head, she was a natural, just like she was at practically everything. His mood was sour because their banter about Tok'ra dancing rituals was cut short when Pete called and she left apologetically without a chance at an actual goodbye. She had nothing to be sorry for. He has no right to be grumpy.

She chose Pete. This is what she wants. It's better this way. He reminded himself. She deserved to be loved without limits. She shouldn't have to wait for someone who doesn't have to pretend she means less than she does.

Even so, all he could think about now was how right her hand felt in his and how easy it all was tonight. So why did they make it so damn hard? He ran his hands over his face. It didn't matter now. Their love had been within his reach all these years, but now it seemed far too gone. So if her friendship was all he could have to keep her in his life then that would have to be enough.

But the way she looked at him tonight when they were dancing reminded him of the time when they were the closest. Maybe… His phone vibrated on the night stand. Glancing at the notification, he saw it was a text from her.

"I had a lot of fun tonight. Hope your feet aren't too sore. Thanks again for coming with me, sir."

Sir. He grunted as he tossed the phone aimlessly on the empty side of the bed and buried his face in the pillow. It was still the same song and dance they've been stuck in for years.

So close. And still so far.