Let's go on a journey. Forks, Washington is our destination. It is just after sunset. The clouds are grey, and are trying to snatch the last bit of color the sun is so desperately hanging on to. We fly above the little town to see the entire ground covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The streets are empty. There is a comforting silence that seems to go hand in hand with the darkness. All the buildings are barely visible, with all the windows covered, and the lights seemed to have disappeared. As we soar over the rooftops and the trees, we come upon a meadow. There is something disturbing the peace the forest offers, angering the silence and waking the trees. Are you curious as to the disturbance? Well then, I'm afraid I can go no further. This, my friend, is your stop.


"Bella, it's just something I can't talk about right now."

"Why won't you tell me? I deserve to know. It's my life too." I couldn't stand that he always hid so much from me. He doesn't understand me. No one understands me. Doesn't he know how much it hurts me? Doesn't he understand how my heart needs answers? He seems to understand everyone else. He talks to everyone else. He knows exactly what everyone else wants. Why am I so different?

"Please, Bella. I can't… It's just… look, I… I'm sorry, Bella. I can't talk about this with you right now."

"With me? You can probably talk to everyone else about this! What makes me different? Why not me? Why, Edward?"

"Please, Bella." His eyes were desperately pleading for me to stop.

"Edward Cullen, you are going to have to tell me sometime."


EPOV

"Edward Cullen, you are going to have to tell me sometime."

Her words played over and over again in my head, and they stung more and more each time. I knew I would have to face her one time or another. I couldn't force her to live like this anymore. I didn't want to force her! There's just something about her, about us. Neither one of us could deny it, or get away from it. One of these days, I'm going to have to just come clean. One of these days, I'm going to run over to her and shout, 'Isabella Swan, It's time you knew! Bella, my sweet Bella, I'm so sorry I've been hiding this from you. Bella, I, Edward Cullen, am a vampire. I have the amazing ability to read minds. Except, I learned I can read everybody's mind, but yours. It fascinates me how I cannot read you. But please, my dear Bella, I love you more than anything. I am so sorry I never told you. I'm sorry I kept you waiting this long. Oh Bella, I'm so sorry.'

I had dreams telling her those words. I always imagined what it would be like to finally tell her. I wanted to tell her more than anything, but so much held me back. Carlisle would never let me. He wouldn't let me explain. The entire family would hate me if she exposed us. But you see, more than anything, I was afraid. Afraid of her reaction. Afraid she would reject me. Afraid she would be scared of me like the monster I was. I didn't want to lose her. I couldn't lose her. I couldn't.


BPOV

Words cannot describe how frustrating that boy is.

I ran home as fast as I could. I didn't turn around. I couldn't. I needed to get rid of all the anger and frustration. I silently thanked Charlie for getting me that journal when I moved here. He didn't know me very well, and that was all he could think of. I don't think he even knows me now. I've been living here almost 6 months and we've barely spoken.

Now where was that journal? Every time my emotions began to take over, I would write a letter, and then just throw it out. I know it sounds like something a therapist would make me do, but it helps. If anyone saw me doing one of those weird 'anger management help' exercises, well, I don't know what they'd think.

Oh! Here it is! Now pencil… pencil… Pencil!

Dearest Edward…


Authors Note: So what do you think? Any suggestions for the next chapter? Im not even sure i should continue it. What do you think? Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated! [: