Me: Carlisle, you are a man of rules. Is there some sort of "disclaimer" rule that I should be following her?
Carlisle: Yes MK, there certainly is.
Me: Um, what is it? I love to follow rules!!!
Carlisle: You must inform all of your readers that Stephenie Meyer created us, the Twilight characters and you don't own anything except this very silly storyline!
Me: Uh, yeah, OK Carlisle. Thanks for insulting my story…maybe you won't get a present from Esme after all…
A/N: Thanks to everyone for the hits, reviews and favorites! I'm glad you are enjoying this story as much as I am. I know I am having issues here with "passive voice"…it is my weakness and I appreciate any tips on how to fix it!!!
Chapter 5: Do they sell houses at the mall?
Esme POV
I was a little apprehensive about the game Alice wanted to play, since they usually didn't involve Carlisle or me. And they usually ended badly; often with significant property damage or someone almost arrested! I realized my fears were well founded when Edward revealed that it somehow involved shopping tomorrow. Didn't Alice know what Black Friday was? Alice loved shopping, but this was too extreme!
"Alice, you can't possibly want us to go out shopping TOMORROW! It's Black Friday for Heaven's sake; it will be a madhouse!" I shuddered involuntarily, trying not to think about the crowds and all the pushing and shoving that went along with them.
"Of course Esme! That's the whole point of the game! Now, let's read along as I go over the rules. Don't interrupt me – Emmett – please reserve all questions for the end." Alice just laughed at me and shook her head. I guess we were in for an interesting day tomorrow…there really was no refusing Alice once she set her mind to it.
She caught my attention when she hit the fourth rule. "Everything you buy must be something you would use for yourself…" Hmmm, I hadn't thought about that! I do enjoy shopping for home furnishings and such. I was sure some of the department stores and home improvement stores on Alice's list were bound to be having sales. This could actually be fun after all!
I grabbed my husband by the hand and hurried him to the dining room. I wanted to use the massive table to get a good look at everything that was on sale and properly strategize. As I spread out the flyers, focusing in on the stores where I normally shopped, I began to get extremely excited, words just tumbling out of my mouth as they came to my mind. "Look at all this cookware on sale! And these curtains and bedsheets! We are going to have to buy a new house so I have something to remodel. I wonder if there are houses on sale somewhere…hmmm, I'll have to look into that."
Carlisle just watched me, smiling lovingly as he sat down in a chair holding a notepad. I slowed down my hunt for the perfect duvet when I noticed what he was doing. "Are you taking notes dear?"
"Yes, my love. There seems to be an enormous amount of possibilities laying out here, I want to make sure you get everything you desire." His eyes twinkled when he said 'desire.'
"You know that you're all I really desire Carlisle! But right now, we need to get down to business! Those kids always think they are the best at these games; it's time to show them who's the boss!
"Yes ma'am Angerler! Do I need to finish my housekeeping duties before we shop?" My silly husband just winked at me.
"Hush dear, you don't want the children to hear you! If they ever found out how addicted we are to bad 80's sitcoms, we are in for a century's worth of teasing! You can get out your feather duster later Tony…" I smiled suggestively at him, knowing he'd catch my drift. "Just the same, check out Best Buy and Circuit City to see which DVDs are on sale…we still need a couple seasons of 'Three's Company', 'The Cosby Show' and 'One Day at A Time.'"
"You're right about the teasing, although I honestly don't know how we've kept it from them this long!"
"Ok, let's get serious. The house on Isle Esme hasn't been redone in about 5 years; I think it is due for an upgrade! Since Jake and Nessie might go there from time to time, I could certainly invest in some new cookware. Those new KitchenAid mixers look pretty snazzy, especially the tangerine color, and Macy's has a great deal on them."
"That sounds excellent; you know how much Nessie likes to make cookies. She'll certainly enjoy that. Perhaps you could design the rest of the house around that color you like so much?" (A/N shout out to Baker's Chocolate story by Hawkins - see the link in my favorite stories)
"That's a brilliant idea honey! I don't think I've ever used that color as a theme before." We are so perfectly matched; Carlisle understands me so well, even the small, seemingly insignificant things. I sighed happily as I thought about how deep our devotion ran. I definitely had to find something special for him tomorrow, something he would never suspect! My eye was caught by the Fredrick's of Hollywood flyer. Hmm, that is an idea…
"Could you bring me a pair of scissors dear? There are some in the kitchen." My husband dutifully walked into the kitchen to get me my tools. I took advantage of his brief disappearance to quickly peruse the flyer, finding a few options that were surprisingly heavily discounted. While everyone in the family assumed Rose and Emmett shared the most "physical" love, my true love and I enjoyed our sleepless nights as much if not more than our son and daughter.
"I've been thinking my love, and I've decided it is high time we won one of these competitions! You said it yourself – we need to show them 'who's the boss'! I'm all in, let's try to win this thing!" Carlisle brought my scissors back, as well as a winning mind-set.
"Dear, what caused this change of attitude?" Not that I minded his competitive side, but it was so rare for him to let it out.
Carlisle POV
I walked into the kitchen at a nice, slow human pace. Esme needed scissors like she needed a steak dinner, but she clearly wanted some privacy for some reason. And far be it from me to deny that woman anything that was in my power to give.
Jake and Nessie were walking out the door to their house on the back of the property. Since they were the only ones who actually slept, as well as the most recently married, Esme always made sure they had their own space of some sort for privacy and quiet. Emmett has found that the hours between midnight and 3am were his best "gaming" hours; and it is hard enough for the rest of us to have privacy around Edward and Jasper, but when Edward is your father, that takes it to a whole new level!
After torturing Edward a little by envisioning their possible evening activities, I heard the young couple starting to strategize.
"Well, if you really want to win, what are we going to do? I know Alice said her visions wouldn't help that much, but I don't really believe her! They are getting so much better, she can even see us sometimes. By the way, what the heck are you planning that impressed the crazy pixie so much?" Jake still sounded reluctant, but like me, he could never deny his true love anything.
"Ha ha! I'll have to 'show' you later…I need to do some research on the Web first. As far as the rest of them, Mom and Dad probably don't care, Emmett will undoubtedly do something ridiculous that will cause them to lose, and Carlisle and Esme don't stand a chance!"
My darling granddaughter just threw down the gauntlet and she didn't even realize it! We don't stand a chance? We'll just have to show her what kind of shoppers Esme and I really are! I returned to the dining room with the scissors, handing them to my wife.
"I've been thinking my love, and I've decided it is high time we won one of these competitions! You said it yourself – we need to show them 'who's the boss'! I'm all in, let's try to win this thing!"
"Dear, what caused this change of attitude?" She smiled at me, looking slightly confused but mainly amused.
"Your darling granddaughter intimated that we aren't even worth worrying about as competition during this game! I know we don't often involve ourselves in these types of things, but it is high time these youngsters learned that we are a force to be reckoned with!" I wasn't angry, simply excited by the chance to take our children by surprise.
"Oh my goodness. They are in for a shock tomorrow, aren't they? Well, perhaps not Alice. Despite her uncertainty about the sales, she probably saw some version of this. She probably forced us to participate just to enjoy the surprise tomorrow when we kick their asses!" My beautiful bride looked more stunned than I was when that phrase left her mouth.
"Well, if we better get planning if we are going to be kicking asses tomorrow…will we take names as well my dear?" I couldn't help but tease her, she so rarely spoke in the vernacular that the kids embraced. I gave her shoulder a squeeze and walked over to the list I had been compiling. "So far, we've got the KitchenAid and a variety of furnishings to match on the list. What else are you thinking, besides the DVDs – I'll need to check at the stores tomorrow, they only have example titles in the flyer."
"Hm, it really is too bad we can't shop for real estate at any of these stores. WAIT! This is perfect! The Home Depot is having a special Black Friday raffle. They are selling chances for $100 for a fixer-upper house a few miles from here! Wouldn't it be wonderful if we won that? I'm beginning to think that the back of the property isn't quite far enough away for Nessie and Jake to have the privacy they deserve." Her topaz eyes lit up in excitement as she read and re-read the raffle information.
"We can both enter, and we'll still have enough money to buy everything else you've picked out. When do they select the winner?" If we won the house, there would be virtually no way anyone else could come close to beating us in this competition. I doubted that any of the other couples were looking at The Home Depot for their shopping list.
"Even better news! This is a 'early bird special' so they are pulling the winner's ticket at noon! If we win, we'll still have hours to buy all sorts of things to furnish it with! Let's only buy a few things before we find out, things that will work in either the island house or this one." She was so excited, I briefly contemplated fixing the raffle. But Edward would find out and accuse us of cheating…we could easily buy the house from whomever won if she really wanted it. I had an idea that would put her over the edge of happiness.
"Why don't we go over to the house in a few hours and take a look around? I'm assuming it is currently empty, so no one will notice us there in the middle of the night. This way you can get all the dimensions and a good feel for the layout for your interior designs."
"What a spectacular idea! And I have another one…a way to kill time between now and then, Tony…" She grabbed my hand and towed me to our bedroom, her topaz eyes darkening in a sultry manner. I think I need to invest in real estate more often!
A/N: Hope you liked this chapter – it was the hardest one for me to write so far. The poll is up about which one-shot of Emmett's exploits I should do. Let me know if you think it is a good idea, and which one you want to see – what happened to the car or the anniversary trip to Chuck E. Cheese.
Please, please, please review – or I will have Jasper make you fall in love with your dirty socks ! Just kidding (not about the pleas for reviews, just the Jasper part – he said he won't do that anymore after accidentally walking in on Emmett and a pair of Edward's sneakers). I love getting feedback, it inspires me to keep writing and helps make my stories better. Thanks to all my faithful readers and reviewers.
Check out my other story, "Destiny of Dreams," you can find it on my profile. It is a serious story, set just prior to Twilight where Bella time-travels in her dreams and meets Edward throughout his life…she thinks she's just dreaming and keeps trying to move on with her life. Will they meet in real life? Read to find out
