DISCLAIMER: my plot, SM's characters and backstory…sadly…
A/N: thanks to everyone for reviewing and the favorites – over 50 with the last chapter – I'm speechless! Okay, maybe not, but you get the drift :) on with the chappy now:
Chapter 8: Walking on sunshine
Alice POV
I rolled out of Jasper's arms as my first clear vision of the contest hit.
Emmett adjusting his strategy, deciding to get the TV instead. Some crazy guy deciding that if he didn't get the TV, no one would. Emmett prowling the aisles of Wal-Mart, desperate for anything that was a great deal so he wouldn't feel the wrath of Rosalie. Emmett buying an ICE CREAM MAKER thinking it was a toy!
"OMC! Jasper, you have got to make sure we run by the grocery store before we get home today. There are some things we need to pick up for Emmett's new 'toy!'" My giggling turned into uncontrollable laughter and we fell off the bed as my husband helplessly reflected my own mirth back at me with more power.
"What did he buy? I thought you said he was going to get another Playstation?" Jasper looked at me with a confused expression, obviously trying to figure out what we could buy for a Playstation at the Greens & Grains.
"I won't tell you, but I'll let you guess! What does Emmett hate the most in the world?" Since Emmett already bought it and both Edward and I could easily know, it wasn't really cheating to tell him. But I loved making Jasper guess – he had the most unusual imagination.
"Um, Seth's impression of him as a vampire?" I shook my head, but grinned at the recollection. That was pretty damn funny, but Emmett hadn't quite seen the humor in it.
"Taking clumsiness lessons from Bella so he can play gym?" Jasper smiled as he was starting to enjoy this guessing game. Thinking of Emmett getting mad has that affect on pretty much anyone!
"Nope! I'll give you a hint…remember Nessie and Jake's first wedding?" I didn't need Edward's gift to see where Jasper's mind was going now. I thought back to the wonderful event myself…
Flashback: 12 years ago
Nessie and Jake stood by the cake, holding the knife together to cut the ceremonial first piece. Instead of a traditional wedding cake, they had decided to go with their own favorites and have an intricately structured series of ice cream cakes. There were four round cakes of different sizes, connected with a bridge to a small cake in the center with their centerpiece on it. Each of the cakes was a different type; they each got their favorite flavor combinations and then got some more traditional flavors so there would be something for all the humans to enjoy.
Nessie didn't like a lot of human food, but she did have a sweet tooth. The rest of us had all done our fair share of "eating" human food to keep up with the charade in the past. It was unpleasant, but not the worst thing in the world. However, there were certain foods that each of us had found to be worse than the rest; for me it was gummy candy and for Emmett it was ice cream. He had once said that he would rather endure Jane's torture for an hour than eat even a spoonful of ice cream. Emmett, of course, really didn't pay attention to any of the planning details prior to the wedding, especially not related to the food. So when Leah dared him to eat a piece of the wedding cake, he said yes immediately.
Leah knew all about what foods we all hated; she was constantly trying to trick us into eating them. She considered it fair revenge for her having to hang around our "stinky sweetness" all the time. For a moment she considered trying to get me to eat the cake, but I just looked at her and raised my eyebrow. She blushed, realizing she was caught. Ice cream didn't bother me as much as it did Emmett, but Nessie had this bizarre love of mixing gummy bears in her ice cream and Leah was going to try to get me to eat that flavor! She knew she rarely had a chance to trick me, so she thought she'd dare me to eat another layer, but substitute at the last minute the one with the gummy bears. It almost worked, especially since I still can't see her future very well; but when Edward heard what she was planning he decided he had to be there to see it, and then I got a vision of how it would all play out. Leah gave up on me and set her sights on Emmett; he is always a much easier target for pranks.
Before the ceremony she innocently started talking to Emmett, joking with him about how lucky he was that there weren't really many people at the wedding that didn't know the truth about everyone so he didn't have to eat a lot of the food to keep up with the "human" thing. He took that as the challenge she meant it to be and claimed he would have no problem eating whatever they had at the reception. She said she'd be satisfied with him just eating a slice of cake, since that is the one thing almost everyone eats at a wedding. Supposedly it was bad luck for the couple if someone didn't eat the cake.
Leah maneuvered the two of them to be right next to the happy couple during the cake cutting, so Emmett could get his piece quickly. Nessie and Jake had just finished their piece when Emmett grabbed the knife himself. Leah's challenge hanging in the air, Emmett grabbed a huge slice of the cake and shoved it in his mouth. Ingeniously, Leah had managed to get him into a position where it would be impossible for him to not finish the cake, since he was standing in front of all the wedding guests. He slowly choked the cake down, the disgust barely disguised on his face. His mouth was still half full when he slapped Jake on the back with words of congratulations and then ran to the nearest bathroom. He didn't come out for an hour, and when he did he looked paler than ever.
End flashback
"OMC Alice! He bought ice cream? How could he not know? He has never even been able to be in the same room as ice cream since that day. That is going to be priceless!" Jazz jumped up and down, hoping that he had finally guessed right. I think I am rubbing off on him; I'm usually the only one that gets this giddy!
"Calm down Jazzy! Yes, you are right – he bought an ice cream maker!" I walked over to my bouncing husband and wrapped my arms around his waist, trying to calm his exuberance. "But don't get too excited now, we don't want anyone else to figure it out and spoil the surprise. Obviously, he has no idea that is what he bought." I felt him calm down slightly and then glanced at the clock. "Okay honey, it's after 4:30, so let's go SHOPPING!!!" I knew my excitement for shopping would definitely help take his mind off of Emmett.
"Let me grab my list and the coupons. I don't want to keep you from your calling my love!" My wonderful husband swept around the room grabbing all of our supplies as I stood helplessly in the middle of the room watching in amazement. He stopped in front of me and kissed me sweetly before grabbing my hand and running down the stairs to the garage. "May the best shoppers win," he shouted out to the rest of the house, taunting anyone who was still there! Really, this whole military strategy as applied to shopping thing is really quite a turn on. If I hadn't been the one who started this game, I might be tempted to stay home. We were already an hour behind schedule thanks to our "activities" last evening, but I didn't really care that much. Actually, maybe we could wait a few more hours…hmmm…
"That's right Alice, you are such a good shopper you think you don't need all the time? You are GOING DOWN!" Edward shouted from his room, obviously still angry about our strategy.
"Of course I don't Edward, but I really enjoy the hustle and bustle of the crowds so I want to make sure we get to experience everything. C'mon Jazz baby, let's get a move on!" Jasper had stopped in his tracks when Edward yelled, confusion written across his face. This time, I grabbed his hand as we dashed into the garage and I fired up the Porsche.
Jasper POV
I had no idea what was going on between my brother and my wife, but I had learned a long time ago that their "discussions" were better left between them unless they dragged the rest of us in. It sounded like they were still arguing about the game, so I just ignored them and focused on the strategy. Once I looked at this as a kind of war game, I found myself actually enjoying all the preparations. Whether I enjoyed the actual shopping part of it remained to be seen.
With Alice behind the wheel, we covered the 20 miles to the mall in less than 10 minutes. When I noticed the speedometer over 130 mph on the highway, I gave her a questioning look.
"What? I have to practice to make sure I don't lose too much time bringing back our bounty in the middle of the day matey! Don't force me to make ya walk the plank!" When she looked over at me, she had one eye closed and a silly grin on her face.
"You do know it isn't 'talk like a pirate day' right? That was sometime in September I think." I loved my little pixie more than life itself, but sometimes I had no idea where her mind was coming from. I both envied and pitied Edward for his gift; often I actually didn't want to know what she was thinking!
"I know silly! Seth has that day circled in red on all our calendars; you know it's his favorite 'holiday.' I was just thinking about something you're going to buy today, that's all." She winked at me after her cryptic answer. I had no idea what she was talking about; there was nothing pirate related on my list right now. But I knew better than to question her.
We walked over the JC Penney and I noted that there really wasn't much of a line. The coupons here were simply based on the total quantity spent, so I hadn't really done much research here. From looking through the sale flyer, I didn't see much Alice would like, so I was actually surprised we were even here. We walked right past all the clothes, shoes and jewelry and made our way up the escalator to the furnishings department.
I gripped Alice's hand tightly on the escalator; to be honest, I was a little afraid of them. Only Edward knew, thanks to the trip we made to DC where we had to go up what seemed like 30 stories on an escalator. I had jumped off and run up the stairs at vampire speed, rushing past the commuters like a burst of wind and met my family at the top. He covered for me, saying he dared me to do it. It was ridiculous, a vampire afraid of an escalator; but I think it probably had to do with the fact that a lot of other people were afraid of them and I was constantly assaulted with feelings of fear and terror whenever I was on them. That was the same reason I rarely went on the really scary rides at the amusement parks we went to.
"What on earth are you getting here dear? I know I don't shop much, but I have never seen a designer label on anything here." I was quite confused, and actually quite eager to get down to the things on my list.
"Be patient my love. Sometimes you have to search for a diamond in the rough." As she said that, she spun around with some brightly colored paper ball lanterns in her hands, holding them up triumphantly. "I've been looking for these for quite some time but haven't been able to find any that will work until now! These will be perfect as lights on the gigantic fir tree behind the house…I want to go really crazy decorating for Christmas this year!" She grinned, bouncing with excitement.
I just shook my head, laughing. "That tree has to be at least 50 feet tall! I guess you need lights that big to balance it all out. I'm sure they will look wonderful dear, but I'm thinking you already know that." I led her to the checkout, listening as she described her other decorating tools.
"Oh, it will look phenomenal! They have that Holiday lights contest in town this year, and we are totally going to win! I figure I can use rolls of aluminum foil for tinsel, some of Carlisle's religious relics as ornaments – he has all those angels and crosses, you know…" She drifted off as we reached the cashier, and stopped suddenly as a glazed look came over her face.
I took the lights from her and handed them to the worried cashier. "Will this be all? Is she OK sir?"
"Yup, this is all we need. She's fine, just fighting a bit of a migraine with all the crazy shoppers you know! Heh heh!" I laughed it off, trying to calm the clerk with my words and emotions so she wouldn't bring more attention to Alice. As if on cue, Alice snapped out of her vision and smiled up at me.
"I, um, just have to go over here for a minute dear. Meet you outside in 10 minutes." She winked at me, and then looked gravely at the cashier. "The fluorescent lighting really gets to me sometimes." She smiled and waved at us both and flounced off to the women's department.
I finished paying, took the bags out to the car and then went out to the mall entrance and waited for Alice. Sure enough, 10 minutes later she strode out of the store quickly, pausing only briefly to grab my hand as we headed to the next place on our task list. Macy's here we come!
Alice POV
I was so excited to finally have those lights in my possession! And, they were 50% off, so that should help in the game! I was explaining to Jasper all of my decorating ideas when the vision hit me. That's when I realized that my "gift" might actual be more of a hindrance today.
Often when I shop, I will get an occasional glimpse of the shoppers around me and what they are planning on purchasing. I usually shop in more upscale stores, so there are salespeople that generally help the customers pick out their purchases and guide them in their selections. Rarely, I will get a vision of someone buying something that is totally wrong and wearing it in an embarrassing situation. I general find a nice way to talk them out of buying it and steer them to something more suitable. I just can't stand to see people wearing bad clothes!
Today, I have a feeling that the visions are going to come fast and furious. Women will so frequently buy things just because they are a good deal and not pay enough attention to what it looks like on them. Or they will have such poor body image that they don't think anything will look good on them, so they don't care. After Bella's human years, I have a little better insight into the thinking of these poor women. So when I had the vision of the overweight woman buying a tent-like dress in a bright chaotic design that made her look twice her size, I knew I had to intervene! I let Jasper know I was ok and mumbled an excuse to the checkout girl and then headed off to find this poor fashion-challenged soul.
I caught her still wearing the dress and scrutinizing it in the dressing room. If possible, it looked even worse than in my vision. She was planning on wearing it to a party, and if she did it'd be the main subject of conversation among the rest of the guests, and not in a good way. She was trying to impress a man she has a crush on, but this was not the way to do it! I walked into the dressing area, testing the waters.
"Wow, that is an interesting dress. Are you going to a party or something?" I was careful not to outright diss the dress, but I didn't want to compliment it either.
"Oh, do you like it? I'm not sure. Yes, our company is having a big holiday party next week! I need to find the perfect dress!" The woman blushed and ducked her head slightly.
"Ooh, anyone special going to be at the party? My name's Alice by the way." I was reeling her in.
"Hi Alice, I'm Meg." She sighed before answering my question with a dreamy look on her face. "Yes, David will be there. We've worked together for 5 years and I've had a crush on him since the first day. We talk all the time and get along great, but he never looks at me 'that way', you know what I mean? I was hoping the right dress might get him to notice, but who am I kidding? He'd never go for a girl like me." Her future was pretty faint, but I saw the possibility of the two of them going home from the dance and she was in a much different dress. This meant she was willing to let me advise her, so I took my shot.
"Well, when I was walking over here, I saw the cutest dress! I think it will look even better than that one on you. Wanna give it a try?" I knew she'd try it on, but I had to ask to be polite.
"Sure, that would be great! I should have brought someone shopping with me, but no one else wanted to brave the crowds. I'm not always the best judge by myself." Her eyes lit up at the thought of me helping her. I darted out of the dressing room and returned with the dress in about 30 seconds. I couldn't resist the speed, I had to see in person how good it would look.
She looked nervously at the dress, eyeing the low V-neck and short length skirt. "Trust me, I know it will look fantastic!" I shoved her in the dressing room playfully and sat on the chair in the waiting area.
"Oh WOW! I almost look sexy!" She stepped out with an incredulous look on her face and almost ran to the three way mirror to admire herself.
"Almost? You look damn sexy! That dress was made for you…see, you have to make the most of your assets! I could never wear a dress like that." While I was eternally beautiful, I could never be described as "curvy," even in a good way. Meg looked stunning, no matter how many extra pounds she was carrying. I was glad to see that her future now seemed to include joining a gym; it seemed that she was just lacking confidence and a reason to try to get into shape. I think David and I have provided her with everything she needed now.
"Thank you Alice! I would have never tried this dress on without you, but it is perfect! How can I ever thank you?" She looked simply ecstatic; I didn't need Jasper to tell me how happy she was.
"Oh, nonsense. Seeing your smile is all I need! Just promise me you'll keep trying things like that and don't let go of your sexy side again! Now, time to go buy that dress and get ready to win David's heart. Good luck Meg, I have to run now. Bye." I turned and walked away, listening to her random chatter as she tried to figure out who I was.
"But Alice, what were you doing here in the first place? Are you guardian fashion angel or something? Maybe I'm still asleep and this is all a dream? Well, I guess I better get back to my shopping or something…"
Ha ha! Guardian fashion angel; that's me!
As I skipped through the store toward Jasper, I was assaulted with visions of several women in Macy's with similar dilemmas to Meg's. It was going to be a long, but fun, day. It was like a whole day of Bella Barbie with shopping combined! Heaven on earth!
Jasper POV
"So, what were you doing? Find more Christmas decorations?" My lovely wife had quite a satisfied smile on her face and I was quite curious to find out what put it there.
"Oh, no I had a vision of a fashion disaster and I had to intervene. Really, some of these women just had no idea how to dress!" She frowned slightly, as she got another quick vision. "It seems that today is going to be full of people making poor fashion decisions, so I think I will be busy playing my guardian fashion angel role. Don't worry though; I'll still have plenty of time to shop…we totally OWN this competition!"
"Okay dear, whatever you want to do. We're splitting up, right? I'll get the coupon things and you get the major purchases. I think we can spend a maximum of one hour here, so we'll meet up then to buy everything together. Have fun love!" I gave her a quick hug and a longer kiss; then I watched as she nimbly navigated through the throng of people straight to a dressing room, picking up a dress that clearly wasn't for her on the way. That's my wife, always trying to dress everyone else! At least this time it sounded like she was actually doing these people a favor.
"Try a sample of our new cologne sir?"
"This beautiful perfume set is perfect for the wife for Christmas; and it's half price today!"
Ugh, I should have learned by now not to walk through the cosmetics section. All of the scents were too much for my delicate sense of smell. I quickly shoved past all the pushy salespeople to the clearer air of the men's department. The first thing on my list was bandanas. We had frequently tried different things to mix up our baseball games and make them more challenging; I had the idea to try it blindfolded, so these bandana's would be perfect for that. Even better, they cost $11 and were not on sale, allowing me to use the "$10 off a purchase of $10 coupon." I only had to use one of the coupons, but the savings was still pretty good so I went ahead and picked up 4 packs so we would have enough for all the players
I carried them with me as I set off for the bedding department. They had a set of satin sheets advertised; they weren't on sale, but I could save $25 with my other coupon. That was 50% off! I couldn't think of anything better to use the "$25 off a purchase of $50 or more;" it was exactly $50 so I wasn't spending extra. Besides, I had always wanted to try satin sheets but I was too embarrassed to tell Alice. Emmett talked about them all the time and she always laughed at him. If I told her it was for the contest, I had an excuse.
I was debating which color to get when I felt my phone vibrate. I had a text from Alice and it was only one word: BLUE. I picked up the blue set and started toward the kitchen section. I had fulfilled my coupon requirements for this store, but I thought I'd check out a couple other things I had seen online in case they were better deals.
As I started walking, I quickly realized that although I had no problem carrying everything myself, a normal human would be struggling mightily. I stopped and looked around for a cashier. I found myself in front of the Christmas display, distracted momentarily by the three-story tree at the center of the display.
"It's a heck of a tree, isn't it? I love this time of year, especially decorating that tree." A pretty young woman wearing a Macy's badge struck up a conversation when she noticed me staring at the tree.
"Yes, it is a beautiful tree. You say you decorated it?" I noticed the look in her eyes as she looked me up and down and identified the satin sheets in my hands. I felt the waves of lust rolling off her and then I got nervous. "My wife loves Christmas; she was just talking about how she wants to get tons of new decorations this year." I pointed to the enormous star at the top of the tree. "Do you sell that here? It would be perfect for our tree at home." I grinned at her, trying to charm her but also letting her know she had no real chance.
"No, we special order it just for decorating purposes. Is there anything else I can help you with?" She looked slightly disappointed whenever I mentioned Alice, but she still was eager to continue our conversation.
"Actually, I was wondering if there was somewhere I could set these things until I am finished shopping. My wife is still in the clothes section, so we could be here for a while before we are ready to checkout!" I winked at her, trying to convince her to help me out.
"S-sure sir. If you follow me to this register, I can place your items behind the counter and hold them for you." She stammered at first, obviously excited to spend more time with me. This was actually pretty fun! I didn't often try to get humans to do things for me, but I was enjoying this. "You know, we aren't really supposed to do this, but it can just be our little secret!" She whispered to me as she slipped my packages behind her register.
"Thanks Cindy." I noted her name on her tag, and she blushed when I said it. "Do you think you could help me with just one more thing?" My Southern drawl was naturally disarming and I poured on the charm, hoping I didn't overdo it.
"Anything sir," she answered breathlessly, her heart beating erratically. Oops! I obviously went too far; I sent her some calming waves, trying to get her a little more relaxed.
"My wife would absolutely die if I could get that star for her tree. Is there any way, any way at all you could find out where it was ordered from so I could try and get one for her?" I smiled sweetly at her, trying to find the right combination of emotions to convince her to help. I felt an initial stab of jealousy when I started my question, but then it toned down to basic envy of our love by the end. I seemed to find the magical combination to make her still want to help me but not want to throw herself at me.
"Stay right here sir, I will be right back with your answer." She blushed again, and skittered off towards the back of the store. I had nothing better to do, so I stood at the counter and continued to admire the tree. Honestly, that star was perfect for what Alice wanted to do. If this Cindy couldn't help me, I'd have to get Emmett to help me come in and steal it sometime. Now that I had seen it, there was nothing that would stop me from getting it for my love.
I was lost in my thoughts about how happy Alice would be when I got the star for her that I barely noticed the passage of time. By the time Cindy returned it had been a full 30 minutes; our time in this store was almost up. I noticed Alice in the distance, watching me closely but not coming nearer. I was just about to ask her why when she nodded slightly over my shoulder. I turned and saw that Cindy was back and carrying a large box.
"We always keep a couple extras on hand in case it breaks during the season. I noticed this year that we had 5 in the back, much more than we needed. I asked the manager and he said it would be okay to sell one to you. I tried to convince him to lower the price since it had been used, but he told me he wouldn't give it to you for less than what we paid for it. I'm sorry, but it is quite expensive." She looked guiltily at me, as if it was her fault. I tried to put her at ease, again sending her waves of calm and confidence.
"Oh, with something that beautiful, I'd expect to pay at lot. I'll take it no matter the cost; surely it must be over $1000." I knew it couldn't be that much, but I threw that figure out there so she'd feel less nervous naming a price that to her was ridiculous but obviously was going to be reasonable to me.
"No sir, it isn't quite that much. Just $150! Wow, now it sounds like a bargain!" She smiled as she set it down on the counter. She looked up and noticed Alice's small figure making her way over to me, her arms full of clothes, smiling brightly at me. "Are you ready to check out now?"
Alice spoke up when she reached my side. "Yes we are dear! Thank you so much for taking such good care of my husband. I'm always afraid he'll get into trouble when I leave him alone in a store for too long!" She laid her clothes on the counter and slid her arm around my waist.
I looked down at her and kissed her gently on her forehead. Even after only an hour apart I missed her so much. As Alice continued with the transaction, chattering off and on with Cindy about the clothes she was buying, I held her tightly to me and relished every moment we had together. I spared Cindy a smile as I gathered up our bags and let myself be dragged to the car by my wife.
"You are the sweetest man in the entire world! That star is absolutely perfect for the tree! I was really struggling with what I was going to use, and you came to my rescue, as usual. Let's get this stuff to the car quickly, and then we can get back to SHOPPING!" She rambled on and I drank in every word. I noticed that I was lighter out now that the sun had come up, even if it was hidden behind the clouds. "I had to rescue 6 women in that store from fashion disasters, but I think everything worked out OK. I've already had visions of 7 people in Nordstrom's, and they just keep coming! I have my work cut out for me today, but I'm enjoying myself. I got a couple visions of Edward and Bella shopping; Bella is going to need an intervention herself! Have I taught her nothing?? Oh, there's the car. I'm just going to jump in the back and put the seat down so we have more room for…" Her words cut off with a scream as she grabbed my arm and pulled me into the car.
(A/N: You know how tempted I was to end the chapter there…)
I was barely in the car when I realized the reason for her scream. The clouds had broken and the sun was shining brightly on the parking lot full of people! We were trapped in the car and it's wonderfully tinted windows. "What happened Alice? How did you miss this?" She looked up at me with angry eyes, and I quickly backpedaled. "Not that I care at all, it's just that you have never been wrong about the weather before. Are you feeling OK?"
Her gaze softened a little and then she narrowed her eyes as she had another vision. "Edward!" That was all she said for a moment. Her face froze as she continued to look to the future, and then a giant grin broke out on her face. "Well, it seems our dear brother has managed to distract me with Bella's bad fashion sense enough to cause me to miss this short burst of sun. We will be trapped her for 26 minutes, and then there will be no more sun for the remainder of the day."
She began digging through the shopping bags, obviously looking for something specific. "My love, what are you looking for?"
She pulled out a pack of bandanas with a triumphant look on her face. "Arr, me hearty! Tis this yer booty? Me thinks it will prove quite fun!" As she wrapped the bandana around my head, I finally realized what her pirate talk was referring to!
"Shiver me timbers, me lass! Remind me to thank that son of a biscuit eater Edward later…" Those 26 minutes trapped in the car were some of the best minutes of my life. YO HO HO!
A/N: Thanks to all my faithful readers and reviewers. You guys rock my world :) This chapter was a little longer, so hopefully worth the wait! I'm working on some of the little one-shot's I've talked about for this story and am going to publish them all in one story as "extra chapters." Be on the lookout for that soon!
