The Escapades of DARTH!! Maximus – Episode I
Disclaimer: I (hopefully) ain't copying no Star Wars stuff?! This story is AU!?
Summary: Very AU! Darth Maximus is the reigning Sith Lord, with his loyal assistants servants Minion Secretary, Minion One, Minion Two and Minion Three. Oh no! What does this mean for our poor, poor galaxy?!
AN: I honestly don't know where this story is going to go. I have nothing planned out as of yet but hopefully I can make this story work.
Now, enjoy! (hopefully)
Chapter One – Introducing...the set.
Out into the early morning sun of the planet Pie walked Darth Maximus. He was wearing his normal white cloak and black tuxedo within. Hurrying behind him was his Minion Secretary, always ready to do whatever the Sith Lord wished. Minions One, Two and Three were nowhere to be seen.
"Say, Minion Secretary, how about a tour of the galaxy?" Darth Maximus asked his faithful Minion Secretary.
"Oh yes!" Minion Secretary said. Darth Maximus abruptly turned around and headed back in.
"I must retrieve my weapons and put them into the Computer!" he boomed.
"The Computer?!" Minion Secretary squeaked. "Your most famous and foremost Star Destroyer?! Right away, sir!" Minion Secretary sped away to prepare the Computer for a loooong, loooooooooong flight.
DMDMDMDMDMDM
Meanwhile, back inside, Darth Maximus retrieved his weapons...including one meat cleaver, one frying pan, one death scythe, etc. etc. At last, he buckled his sword to his waist, as all the power in all lightsabers had run out. Of course he took his lightsaber, (which was of a bright pink colour) as a reminder that he was a Sith Lord. (he sometimes forgot.)
DMDMDMDMDMDM
Aboard his personal Star Destroyer, named the Computer, Darth Maximus strode to his Minion Secretary.
"Are all the PIE Fighters in the hangar?" he asked. Minion Secretary replied,
"Of course sir. What do you take me for? An idiot?"
"Well, is my personal chair on board?" he frowned at her. "Don't tell me you forgot again!" Minion Secretary cowered back as Darth Maximus started on his childish tantrum.
"You always forget! You always forget my personal chair slash throne! AND MY TEDDY BEAR! MY TEDDY BEAR!!"
Suddenly, posture and calm exterior was complete upon his face.
"Thou shalt go forth, prithee, and retrieve thy throne and teddy bear. Quick, Minion Secretary, for we must leave aboard my Computer soon." He said.
Minion Secretary nodded quickly exactly five times and sped off.
One minute went by.
Two..
Three...
BANG! Minion Secretary crashed into the room, nearly toppling as she carried a small chair as well as a teddy bear.
Darth Maximus coughed...and choked. Choking, he spluttered. Spluttering, he wheezed, doing an impressionable impression of Darth Vader. Minion Secretary helpfully handed him an inhaler, to which he puffed at exactly five times. Then she walked to the front, where there was a terrific view, planted the chair down, cranked it up (Darth Maximus was EXTREMELY short, so there was something underneath his chair which allowed it to be lifted up to extreme heights. Darth Maximus was said to actually reached the top of Mount Nevergo on the planet Opposite, said to be the tallest mountain in the galaxy by using this chair) and placed a cushion on the seat. Satisfied, Darth Maximus clambered onto his seat and commanded his Minions to set course for planet Coruscant...or at least what was left of it...
End Chapter
AN: Well? What did you think of it? Good bad? Please review! Click that beautiful blue button down there and let me know what you think. Next chapter: Coruscant. Home planet to...Hutts? WTF?!
I promise the next chapter will be longer! Promise!
