Summary: She's living in a world of sex, drugs, depression, self harm, and more just trying to get by. There's only one person who can save her from this life...and from herself. Can he? Loe.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
I woke up in a very unfamiliar place, but to a very familiar face; a face I recognize from the dreams I've been having for the past couple of days. With a gasp, I realize where I am; Joe's room. How fucked up was I last night? My heart is beating fast and I'm sure he can hear it, damn the adrenaline rush.
"Hey Lilly, how you feeling?" His angelic voice asked me, breaking the silence and my wave of confusion. My eyes begin to focus and I get a clearer picture of his face, he looks worried…and kind of nauseated? My heart beats faster and at the same time drops into my stomach; what happened last night? Or this morning, or whatever!
"Like I got hit by a truck," I grumble, my voice is very hoarse. I see a smile peek out from under his worried expression. "You look like it too," he responds.
I scowl at him. "Thanks." His smile drops, "No offense or anything!" he quickly says. It's my turn to smile now; it was really cute the way he blushed. Silence.
I figure if I'm ever going to find out what went down between me and Joe, I'm going to have to be the one to bring it up. "So…what happened last night?" I ask, holding my head as I try to sit up. He gently pushes me back down. "Just lie down and rest," he commands me. He's avoiding eye contact with me. I know I'm giving him a weird look, but I can't help it.
"Joe…" I start but he interrupts me. "What do you remember from last night Lilly?" he asks me, still avoiding my eyes. I struggle to think…shit. I know I went with Blake, got fucked up, met a guy…but the details aren't clear, and I certainly can't tell him this.
"I…I don't remember," I lied, trying to make eye contact with him. I guess another good thing about fucking around with Blake is that I became a good liar. I'm a horrible person.
To my surprise, his beautiful brown eyes find mine. They look angry; angry enough to make me wince. I can feel my face change from surprised to confused; why did I wince? Nobody can ever make me wince like that anymore….
"Lilly…." He seems lost for words, or trying to say something totally awkward. Shit…I hope we didn't have sex. Double shit…I hope I didn't take his v-card. V-card? I mentally slap myself for that one. "Lilly…this morning when I took you here, you told me some things, things I'm praying to God aren't true."
How ever fast my heart was beating, now slowed to a complete stop. It takes everything in me to keep my voice calm, "And what might that have been?" His eyes find mine again, and this time I see the pain in them. "I don't know how to say this…do you promise you won't get mad?" he asks me in a whisper. I nod my head once.
"Okay…." He said. Then he tells me everything I don't want to hear, everything I've been trying so hard to keep a secret. I had confessed my life to a kid I met a couple days ago. As soon as I feel the tears in my eyes, I know I won't be able to pass it off like I was just drunk-talking.
Words weren't even necessary. "So…it is true?" he whispers to me. I just break down crying. Joe grabs me in his arms and holds me tight. I've never had anyone hold me like this…it felt kind of nice.
I don't know how long it was that I stayed crying in his arms, but eventually I broke away. He stared at me for a long time, but it was my turn to avoid eye contact. "Lilly….please tell me everything," he whispers softly. His hands move to my cheek and I feel myself flinch. He immediately retracts his hand and quickly adds, "Sorry." I shake my head and grab his hand, holding it tightly in my own. With a deep breath, I begin to spill my life and all my secrets to this beautiful boy.
Throughout the stories his expressions ranged from really sad to really angry. I found it kind of amusing that he got so into them, but then I realized that why wouldn't he? This is some pretty serious stuff. "Lilly how could you go on so long without telling anyone?" he asks me, squeezing my hand tighter in the process. I shrugged, "it's complicated Joe." He shook his head furiously. "If you were in so much pain you SHOULD have told someone! You could have been seriously hurt." He seemed to cringe at the thought. I gave him a weak smile. "I'm already hurt Joe." I patted my chest with my free hand.
Brown met blue again as he looked into my eyes. I saw pain, anger, and confusion. I never knew how much I meant to a kid I just met?
"Does anyone else know?" he asked me. I shook my head. "Well my best friend Miley knows some of it…but not really." He looked away and bit his bottom lip; I could tell he was in pretty deep thought.
"I have to do something about this," he muttered, either to himself of me, but either way I hear it and immediately spring upwards. "No!" I shout much louder than I necessarily need to. He looked at me again. "Lilly this isn't right…" he began but I cut him off, "Joe promise me, please, you won't tell anyone. Not one single person," I demanded. He didn't answer for quite some time; he just kept staring into my eyes. Finally he spoke, "I promise."
He leans down and places a kiss on my lips. I did not expect this. I feel the shocks fly through every inch of my body, numbing every place they touch in an instant. I kiss him back, putting my hand behind his head and pulling myself up to him. Our lips move in synch, he grazes his tongue against my bottom lip. Forever after, we break apart to breath. I lost my breath from the kissing and because he stole it away from me. I stared at him, dazed, I've been kissed a lot of times but none ever felt like it did just now.
He breaks the silence by cupping my cheek and whispering to me, "I won't let anything happen to you anymore."
Now lusting for the feeling after he kissed me again, I pulled his face back down towards mine. He gladly kissed back. He slowly finds his way on top of my trembling body, and we slowly fall back into a laying position; lips moving frantically. Before I knew it, my shirt was off, and then his. I cant believe this, what is going on?
Sorry! Short and boring chapter, but I wanted to leave a little cliffhanger there! Ahahaah(:
review?
