Part 3

"No!" Daniel shouted as Jack tried to get the t shirt over his head. "Not wearing."

"Yes you are. We can't go shopping with you in your vest." He managed to get it over his head and push his arms into the sleeves.

"No want," Daniel said trying to grab at the hem of the offending Superman t shirt and pull it up. However his fine motor skills weren't very good and he couldn't get a good grip of it.

"If you wear it I'll buy you some new ones that you like," Sam said.

"Good, 'am." He frowned over at Jack," 'ad 'ack."

"Not my fault you're a mucky eater," Jack said. "The rate you're messing my clothes I'll have nothing clean at the Mountain to wear. Imagine if the Tok'ra come to call and my shirt is covered in macaroni cheese."

Daniel giggled. Jack thought it was a wonderful sound. He had barely heard Daniel laugh. "You think that's funny do you?" he said grabbing the small boy and throwing him down on the bed.

He proceeded to tickle him until Sam said," Sir you'll make him ill."

"Better change the diaper before we go," Jack said.

"NO, 'ACK."

"Sorry buddy. Next time you decide to try out some alien technology remember this." He grabbed the diaper bag and took out a clean one.

"I'll just leave you, sir," Sam said backing out the door.

"Come on Carter, it's only a diaper."

"But it's Daniel, I can't. He'll be so embarrassed when he grows up."

"Alright leave the poor Colonel again." He managed to get the old diaper off easily but putting the clean one on was not easy. "Come on Danny give an old man a break and lie still."

"No like."

"By tomorrow you won't need one. How quick is that for toilet training?" Daniel tried to roll over and get off the bed but Jack was quicker. He leant down and blew a raspberry on Daniel's tummy. Daniel giggled. "Like that?"

"Gain," Daniel said. Jack did it again to a huge giggle. He could remember doing this to Charlie when he was little as well.

Ten minutes later he was standing by the lift with a clean Daniel. Sam was coming along the corridor towards them. Dr. Fraiser came out of the General's room. "Colonel O'Neill, don't be too long."

"Tell that to this menace," Jack said. "Took me long enough to change his diaper."

" 'ack!"

"Buy enough clothes to do until he's ten."

"Wont the people in the shop think it's unusual to buy all those different sizes at once?"

"Intimidate them with your glare, you're good at that."

The trip to the shop was uneventful, Daniel was sitting in his booster seat that Siler had found for him. Jack had expected complaints but didn't get any.

They went to the closest big shop they could. Daniel's eyes went very round when he saw the book shop. "After we've got the clothes you can go in there, okay?"

"Kay, 'ack."

Jack had thought Daniel leading the diplomatic negotiations on another planet was long but this was taking ages. Nothing pleased the two year old. Everything he held up Daniel shook his head. They headed for another stand of t shirts, Jack held up one with Bart Simpson. Daniel shook his head.

Sam came over with some packs of plain t shirts but he shook his head again. "Well what do you want?" Jack finally said. They were getting some strange looks from the other customers. "Come on Danny, we want to get out of here before you grow up."

"Form," he said.

Sam looked at Jack as if to say what did he say.

"You want clothes that look like our uniform?" Jack said.

Daniel nodded his head. They searched all over the shop but still nothing was right. Jack was beginning to lose patience. "Right buddy. If you don't start picking clothes I'm going to go round and pick the most hideous t shirts I can find, starting with that Bart Simpson one."

"No!"

"You've got one minute." Daniel quickly looked round at the stands and ran over to look at the t shirts. He picked up a pack of black.

"Those are the ones I showed you first," Sam said exasperated. "How do parents do this?"

Jack found some trousers that looked like combat ones and Daniel grinned and nodded. Thank God he thought to himself.

The most difficult thing was shoes. They ended up buying 6 pairs of the same kind of flashing trainers. It amazed Jack that Daniel wanted plain clothes but he seemed to be fascinated by the trainers. He was jumping up and down watching the light go on. Many of the mum's in the queue smiled. Daniel was a lovely mix of 2 year old and 32 year old. He lifted Daniel up into his arms.

As they left the shop Jack asked," Hungry?"

" 'ooks, 'ack. 'omise."

"Okay, I promised." They headed for the book store.

Daniel headed straight for the history section. A woman came over, "Please don't let your son touch the books, you know how sticky their little fingers get."

"No 'uch, wead," Daniel said angrily as he accidently kicked out his little trainer covered foot and hit the pile of books out of her hands.

"Very careless of you, imagine dropping all those lovely books," Jack said walking on with a giggling Daniel. Sam could barely control her laughter.

"No want now," Daniel said.

"How about Harry Potter, adults read them as well," Sam said.

"He'll be grown up before he finishes it," Jack said.

"Then he can read it himself." Jack saw Daniel's eyes move towards the display with pyramids. There were toy monkeys and camels round it. Jack wondered if Daniel ever had a cuddly toy.

"Want a monkey or a camel?" Jack asked.

"No! Too big."

"You're never too old. Here." He lifted down the little grey monkey. Daniel held his arms out and took it. Jack thought he saw a tear in Daniel's eyes. He'd make sure to ask about the toy when Daniel could tell him.

He grabbed a selection of books, jigsaws and games as well as Harry Potter, just to keep Carter happy.

The SUV looked like Santa's sleigh when they packed all the things into it. "Let's get a McDonald's," Jack suggested. "Every kid should taste one." They went through the drive in part and Jack got some chicken nuggets for Daniel. Unfortunately he also got tomato ketchup forgetting how Daniel liked to wear his food.

Daniel's shirt and trousers looked as if he'd been in a battle. He was covered in the stuff. "It was only a small sachet," Jack said. "Let's go, another bath needed."

After his bath Daniel took a well earned nap as did his two helpers. Teal'c took some lovely photos to keep as blackmail material later on.

TBC