So, since some more interest has been shown in the wacky adventures of Anti and Repliku, then we shall continue. Now that they've gotten out of Kingdom Hearts and have a means of transportation, where will their base be? Let's see to find out...
Chapter Three: Home Sweet Home
(A.K.A. In which our villains find a base of operations to begin their global-I mean, universal conquest)
"So where exactly are we going?" Repliku called over his shoulder at the heartless leaning against the railing.
Munching on what appeared to be an apple, Anti made a vague gesture with his claws, "Just keep going until you run into a world. We need to find a secret base for us to begin universal conquest."
Repliku stared at what Anti was eating. "What's that?"
"What's what?" Anti asked, and as he said this, something red was dribbling down his mouth.
"I-is that what I think it is!? Are you actually eating someones heart!?"
"I'm a heartless, what did you expect for me to eat?"
Repliku put a hand to his mouth, "That's disgusting!"
"I was starving! So tough noodles." Anti muttered as he ripped another chunk out of it, causing Repliku to temporarily leave the wheel to throw up over the side of the ship. He did not return until he was sure that Anti was finished, and soon resumed his position at the wheel, looking somewhat green in the face. He then spotted a planet nearby, one that looked like nothing but ocean, yet one could see a city that was under the water.
"What about that one?"
Anti glanced at it. "Too underwater."
"That one?" Repliku asked, pointing to one that looked like a desert world.
"Too dusty. Oh, how about that one?" Anti asked, pointing to something next to them.
"Anti...that's a whale...that's heading straight for us!" Repliku quickly turned the wheel, narrowly avoiding Monstro as the whale continued on its way past them. "We need to find somewhere that no one is going to look. Some place that's conveniently vacant that no one would suspect."
"Like that one?"
Which was a large castle with a bright glowing neon sign pointing to it that proclaimed "Vacant and Unsuspecting Castle-Perfect for Beginner Villains!"
Repliku shook his head. "Nah, that sign is a dead giveaway. People would obviously think that there are bad guys there."
"Good point. Then let's go to that one. That place looks pretty damn evil."
Repliku looked where he was pointing, frowning as he read the convenient signs floating about. "That's Halloween Town."
"No, the place next to that."
"...That's Disney Castle."
"Exactly."
"No, Anti."
Anti pouted. "Fine, you pick someplace then."
Repliku looked around before spotting a small town. "That one looks interesting. Not as many people, and you could just take the hearts of any people that are there. And I doubt anyone would know that it's a villain's base."
"Hmm...alright. Set sail for...what's it called?"
"According to the sign, it's called Traverse Town."
"For Transvestite Town!"
"Anti, you know that's not what I said."
"Said what?"
"Transvestite Town."
"Haha, you said 'transvestite'. Someones having dirty thoughts today, aren't they?"
Repliku simply threw his hands up in the air in frustration, not even bothering to argue with the heartless. Instead, he drove toward the town and was soon hovering over the Second District next to the bell tower.
"How do you even park this thing?" Repliku wondered aloud as he attempted to find someway to keep it steady next to the tower.
Anti held up a giant rusty anchor. "I guess we use this thing."
He then picked it up with rather impressive strength, and hurled it as hard as he could. It collided into the side of a nearby building, demolishing a perfectly good building. Cursing, Anti pulled the anchor back up and tried again, and this time it swung around one of the pedestals of the tower and stayed without demolishing it.
"There, that should do it." Anti said, pleased with himself.
"Good, now we can...what are you doing?" Repliku asked, watching Anti taking a bar and wedging it through the spokes of the wheel that controlled the ship.
"Making it so that no one can steal the ship, duh."
Repliku ignored him as he carefully climbed over the side of the ship, shimmying down the chain of the anchor until he was safely on the other side.
"Ok, now you can-how did you get here so quickly?" Repliku asked, jumping slightly when he realized that Anti was right next to him.
"Again, heartless powers. Keep up with the program, will you?"
Repliku watched as he began to look the tower up and down. "Hmm...this place needs a new look, something that says, 'This is an evil menacing tower, so get the hell out, however feel free to take a pamphlet on how we plan to enslave you on the way out.' type of thing."
Anti snapped his fingers, and suddenly, several Shadows appeared in front of them. "You guys take care of any people inside, and make sure to spread some darkness throughout the inside; some of you take care of the outside. Also, some of you should repaint the walls. I'm rather fond of periwinkle blue. And you," he paused, pointing to one, "Go make me a sandwich. The rest of you, hop to it!"
The Shadows disappeared. Anti and Repliku watched as the tower slowly became covered in darkness, like long vines stretching around the tower. Soon, the entire tower had been changed completely into a large, menacing tower that loomed over the district, long dark vines stretching slowly across the ground and over nearby buildings.
"Gee, Anti, if you can do stuff like this, I'm surprised you didn't beat the real Sora back then."
"That's because back then I was a mindless idiot."
"Kind of like how you are now?"
"...I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."
The Shadows reappeared again, reporting in high squeaky voices that their work was complete. "And here's your sandwich!" said the one holding a plate above it's head with the sandwich.
"Good." Anti said, taking the sandwich from it and eating it in one bite. He then addressed them once again, "Alright, go spread some panic in the third district and this district for any humans wandering around...and you, go make me a sandwich." he ordered, once again pointing to the one from before.
"But didn't you just eat a sandwich?"
"Oh I'm sorry, did I ask for questions? No, I asked for a sandwich. Now go."
The little Shadow growled a little before vanishing as Anti said, "And this time, less blood and more ham! God, it's so hard find reliable help these days..."
He turned to Repliku, who was staring at him incredulously. "What?"
"Are you an ass to everyone?"
"Of course. Why, did you think you were a special case or something?"
"Not really."
"Good. Now if you're done playing twenty questions, let's go check out the first district. And hopefully Paco will have gotten me a sandwich by then."
Repliku raised an eyebrow. "Paco?"
"That's my new name for him for now on."
"And his new purpose in life is to fetch you sandwiches?"
"Exactly!"
"...You're a jerk."
"I know, aren't I great?" Anti said cheerfully, to which Repliku just rolled his eyes.
----------------------------
It was a quiet evening in Traverse Town's 1st district, with people calmly strolling about and minding their own business. These were people that had either chosen to remain behind while the others had left to Hollow Bastion, or new residents that had drifted there from their own worlds.
Suddenly, the doors to the second district burst open, causing several people's heads to turn as a voice replied, "There wasn't a need to kick the doors open, Anti."
"Yes there was."
"No there wasn't, now we're going to have to refurbish the doors. Do you have any idea how much it costs to fix doors these days?" Repliku asked, pausing to examine them.
"Can you go five minutes without nagging me? First it's how I treat my employees, next about how I treat doors. There is just no pleasing you, is there?" Anti threw his hands up in the air as he strolled into the first district. The people were too shocked at their appearance to take notice of the fact that one of them was a heartless. When Anti was aware that he was being stared at, he gave a jovial wave.
"'Sup humans? I'm Anti, and I'm going to be taking over your planet as your supreme leader."
"Ahem." Repliku coughed from where he stood by the doors. Anti rolled his eyes.
"OK, one of the supreme leaders. So if you'll just calmly stand at attention and not run around panicking..."
"Oh my god, that's a heartless!" someone shouted, having noticed for the first time.
"And they're going to take over our planet!"
"Quick, everyone scream and run around in circles!", someone else suggested, which all of them started to do.
Anti didn't even bother looking at Repliku, who was holding his sides and trying not to laugh as Anti attempted to gather order. "Hey, this is exactly what I told you not to do! Come on...stop..."
Anti drew in a deep breath before screaming, in the loudest and most scariest voice that even sent a shiver down Repliku's spine, "I'M GOING TO DEVOUR YOUR HEARTS IF YOU DON'T KINDLY SHUT THE HELL UP RIGHT NOW, GOT THAT!?"
Everyone immediately stopped running around and screaming, cowering in place as Anti continued calmly, "That's much better. Now, I know you all are thinking that you're going to die, which is probably true. However, at the moment, I can't afford to kill every human on this planet, otherwise I'd end up starving. So here's what we are going to do. I will allow for most of you to live. In return, I ask not to go into the second or third districts, as I will be claiming those two districts as our territory. If anyone asks, there are an infestation of rats. Me and my associate will be allowed to freely roam this district whenever we want. Otherwise I will tear your skin off and feed you to the heartless. Any questions?"
Someone in the back raised a hand. In response, Anti conjured a dark ball of energy in one hand and threw it at the person, obliterating them where they stood. "Any other questions?" Anti smiled in the most kindest and yet creepiest smile that a heartless could ever smile. Everyone quickly shook their heads.
"Good. Now if you'll excuse me, I have values to twist and minds to warp. And interior decorating to manage; I'm thinking that a nice blood-red carpet would work wonders for the entrance-way..." Anti said cheerfully as he and Repliku returned to the second district, doors shutting behind them, the last thing being heard by everyone was, "And Paco, get me more sandwiches!"
As soon as they were gone, one human swore loudly to another, "Great, just bloody great. This never would of happened if Leon and the others hadn't left!"
Meanwhile, in Hollow Bastion...
"Achoo!" Leon sneezed as they were putting together a new building.
"Something wrong, Leon?" Aerith asked.
"Maybe someone was talking about him..." Yuffie suggested, earning a glare from Leon.
"Of course not! Although, I've got the strangest feeling that someone named Paco is being forced to deliver sandwiches to someone."
