Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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As soon as the door to her apartment opened Penelope thought she had found her safe place, her hide away from destructions but not tonight. Her and Derek walked in and yet as she walked in the feelings still hung over her. She felt haunted, she felt hunted.

'Baby girl go and have a shower okay? I'll get something to eat.' She nodded, he was worried about her because she had become quiet at the bar, she had told the others that tomorrow if they went to hers for breakfast she would tell them everything, but for tonight she couldn't cope. He watched her walk despondently into the bathroom and close the door behind her.

She turned the shower on and sat on the toilet seat, she put her elbows on her knees and placed her head in her hands, only now did she allow the tears she had tried so hard to hide. Her past had just been exposed and laid bare to a stranger; he had made her sound like the perpetrator when in fact she was the victim through and through. He had made it sound like she could have somehow prevented it happening, that she could have demanded answers. Still crying she undressed and stood under the flowing water, she just stood aimlessly, not doing anything, her tears mixing with the artificial tears made from the shower head. Every time she closed her eyes she opened them to see the room. Her eyes shot open to reality and there she was in her bathroom, 9 years in the future.

'Baby girl?' Derek asked worryingly as he tapped on the door, Penelope's showers never ran over 15 minutes, now she had been in there over 25 and he knew what she was up to.

'I'll be out in a minute.' She replied and he heard her voice thick with tears.

'C'mon baby, come out to me.'

'I'm okay.'

'No you're not.' He said feeling useless as he heard her voice break. 'P... now... get here.' He said sternly. He waited and heard the shower turned off, he waited again and minutes later the door opened and Penelope appeared in front of him.

'I'm sorry.'

'For what baby girl?'

'For never telling you... and you being here.'

'P... I want to be here for you, but if you'd rather I left...'

'No!... sorry no please don't.' She said looking down.

'Come on baby girl, get some clothes on, we need to talk.' She nodded and complied, grabbing some sweats that Derek smiled as he recognised as his, and an oversized top, that was also his. 'This isn't a fair trade baby girl, you have two pieces of my clothing, and I have none of yours.'

'I'd like to see you fit handsome.' She said as she opened to door fully clothed, her hair down and damp, her eyes reddened with tears and glassy.

He took one look at her and pulled her towards him. 'I want you to know I don't think any less of you P... what I saw today was a brave woman that would not let a man beat her down.' It was then he felt her body shake as she sobbed; he tightened his grip on her, proving the comfort he wanted to give to her.

She pulled away from him and continued to look down. 'Sorry, I've been so good at living life with that as a memory that him putting the pictures out and making me relive it all forcefully has just brought it all to me, every time I close my eyes it's there.'

'I get that baby.' He said, she looked him in the eyes and she smiled slightly, he did get it. It happened just after Buford, so he got it.

'Thank you.' She whispered. 'If there was anyone I want here right now, it would've been you.'

'I want to be here... after how you looked out for me after Buford, I want to be here.' He said with a genuine smile. 'Come on I have food waiting for us.' He led her to the table and they ate in silence, her mind obviously working overtime. When they were finished they jointly did the washing up, he allowed her the silence she needed again. She grabbed him a beer and got herself a glass of wine; she then sat down and patted the sit next to her for him to sit.

'What film baby girl?'

'I don't mind...' She looked at him. 'Can we just... talk?'

'About what?'

'About what happened today.'

'Okay...'

'I truly am sorry... my plan was to tell you and I was going to broach the subject when we were meant to go to lunch but that went askew and I ended up in an interrogation with my past being thrust upon me with so much force I felt my life falling down.' He nodded. 'The detective wasn't listening and I felt so exposed with those photo's there and for once in my life I had to step up and take it, I couldn't just run and hide.'

'Hotch is proud of how you handled it.' She looked at him with shock filled eyes. 'You fought your side when we couldn't... you stood your ground.'

'I just needed him to see what he was clearly missing.'

'And even if you felt like you didn't get that... Hotch finished him off.'

She smiled slightly, a smile full of sadness. 'I don't know how to feel, do I feel loved that my brother protected me or do I feel terrible because he did revenge on my behalf?'

'P... he did what he did because the thought of someone doing that to his little sister and getting away with it was to great to let lie.' He kept her eye contact. 'He came to you in the hospital, he also kept check on you, well after... he confessed the moment Hotch said you were being done for it... he knew what he did and his taking the punishment like a hero... and to be honest, I think he's brave, for him to put his life in jeopardy to make sure you were safe from a man that would never leave you alone makes a really loving person.'

'You think?'

'I know so...' He then allowed a smile to escape his lips. 'You may have been broaching the subject with me about this but I was needing to talk to you about something.'

'Oh?' She asked raising her eyebrow at him.

'Yes... you know how we're best friends?' She nodded. 'And we spend a LOT of time together?' She nodded again. 'Well, I think I love you.' He said sheepishly, mentally kicking himself. 'I'm sorry... that wasn't meant to come out like that... but I have had this feeling for too long... and I understand if...' He couldn't continue as his lips became joint with Penelope's. When they finally pulled away, she had blushed a bright red colour. He smiled at her and kissed her how he had wanted to. 'I take that as you want this too?'

'I do... I really do.' She said with so much certainty. 'Another thing I felt was time to tell you but I was...'

'Scared.' He said at the same time as her.

'Yes.' She laughed nervously. 'I was scared to ruin what we have but my life's been put into perspective and I don't want secrets.'

'Me neither.'