Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds
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She thrashed about and then jolted awake, immediately feeling the tightened grip of Derek around her. She relaxed into his grip but couldn't keep the tears held back.
'Hey baby girl.' He released the grip, and sat up to hold her properly and wipe the remnants of tears from her face. 'Want to talk about it?'
She bit her lip and saw the unity they had formed, she needed to tell and he obviously needed to hear. 'I... It was the night I came out of the bedroom and you were on the floor and someone grabbed me but Chase... didn't take us, he just...' She began to sob.
'He what P?' He asked knowing the only way to get over a nightmare was to express it.
'He killed you all. He killed you all in front of me. He made me watch it.' She sobbed harder. 'I don't ever want to see that happen again.'
'Come here... unfortunately I have to tell you that we are planning to stick around for much too long to come for you to worry.' He joked slightly and she smiled sadly as she nodded into his chest. 'What about the one before this one?' He looked her in the eyes, she had briefly woken earlier from the throes of a nightmare but had instantly fallen back to sleep.
'He repeated what he did before...'
'What else?'
'It was done in front of you lot.' She sniffed at the end of it, but no more tears fell which must have a been an evident element of closure for her.
'P... 'Derek said not knowing quite where to take this answer. 'Hotch wants to talk to you about everything today... will you be up for that?' She shrugged. 'Well it might help... and tell him about the nightmares...'
'I think I need to see someone.' She admitted. 'I do not want to live my life dreaming of that happening again or you getting hurt.'
'I get that and I respect that... I'm proud of you, you know that.'
'Proud? I'm slightly in the middle of a mental breakdown. How does that evoke pride?'
'No you're not if you were you wouldn't be admitting to help baby girl... you've seen those in the middle of mental breakdowns they don't acknowledge they have problems... they see us as the ones that have the problems.' She nodded. 'Now come here.' He said eloping her in a hug and pulling her down to a lying down position. 'Better?'
'Mm, much better.' She said as she settled down.
'No one's going to be hurting you P... no one.' And with that said the last of the stress defused and Penelope fell asleep in the continual embrace of Derek.
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When woke up again she was alone this time and she heard talking. She felt tired like she usually did after having nightmares, she felt saddened that they had occurred, she also felt happy that they were over, she felt relieved to wake up and not feel ready to give up. She caught a glimpse of the ring on her finger and smiled, as she did so she felt all the worries of nightmares and all the feelings of dread she had been carrying on her shoulders disperse and dissolve away. That ring proved she had a permanent protector who would cradle her through the nights and look after her whole heartedly. With that ring she didn't need to succumb to weakness when she had someone behind her willing her to keep going and reach for strength. She listened intently to the voices, both the voices she knew immediately but couldn't understand what they were saying because they were muffled due to the door being closed. She got up and got changed from her pyjamas and then left the room to be greeted with smiles.
'Good Morning Penelope.' Hotch said from where he was seated. Derek got up and grabbed a cup and made a drink for Penelope and she remained standing.
'Good morning boss man what you doing here?'
'Well I like the more talkative Penelope.'
'Sorry about that.'
'It's okay, I understood but I want a chat.'
'And I need to take Clooney out, so baby girl you sit and talk and I will see you in a bit.' He kissed her forehead grabbed Clooney's lead and attached it to the lead and only then did she realise he was dressed ready for his run. That said this was going to be a long talk. As soon as the door closed, Hotch looked at Penelope.
'I just want to say that I understand that with everything that has happened in the last 3 or so months has taken its toll and I know you have had a lot thrown at you and right at this moment life seems a little top heavy.'
'Sir... I want.' She stopped herself. 'I need to see someone.' She admitted and felt better for just asking.
'Are you sure?'
'I can't live with my free thoughts wandering to what happened. Not just all those years ago but also the other day... it was my problem and I almost got you all hurt.'
'Penelope... do not start to blame yourself for what happened the other day, it was an act of evil, if he wanted you, he would've got you and like you told him. If he wanted to kill you he wouldn't have made a game out of it first. He wanted an audience and he got one but he lost, you won.'
'I know but what if he hurt you.'
'He didn't, he never did and never will.'
'I just... I just can't get over where we were and the thoughts of what could have been.'
'I get that Penelope I really do, but you need to think ahead not behind. I realise that at the moment the grass doesn't seem greener on the other side, that at the moment it appears to be brown and almost hateful but it's not, it's really not. You're out, you're free of him now, and you're engaged.' He saw Penelope smile at that fact and she looked at him. 'Morgan told me, he's over excited about it, utterly overwhelmed that you said yes to him.'
'Really?'
'Penelope... the man idolises you. If he lost you, we'd lose both of you.' Hotch replied and took a sip of his coffee. 'What you need to realise is that you have 6 people who love you too much to allow you to get swallowed up by the past. You're usually our light in the dark now we're yours.'
'Thank you.'
'Any day Penelope.' He gave one of his half smiles. 'Now show me what that ring looks like now it's on your finger.'
