Chapter 4:

Alucard sat up slowly and looked around blearily. Where am I? he thought confused for a few seconds before it all came back to him. Oh. He heard a person yawn and stretch and he turned to see himself waking up.

"Welcome back to the world of the undead," he commented once Seras had fully regained consciousness. She grumbled something and stumbled off into the woods.

"Hey Alucard come check this out," she tossed over her shoulder once she reached the tree line. He got up and walked over to where she stood. They stood on a hill-top gazing down at the now-still Mating Grounds. Banners waved slightly from hundreds of tents and everything appeared ghostly and silent in the early morning fog.

Alucard smiled slightly. "It's nice. We need to go now," he said observing the fog completely cover a ten then roll away in a soft breeze.

Seras gazed at him surprised. "Leave? But…well…ok."

Alucard checked his watch and then began to climb down the hill into the valley itself. Seras quickly jogged after him.

"What time is it?" she asked.

"4:30," responded Alucard weaving his way around piles of ash where fires had once stood.

"When's the helicopter coming to pick us up?"

"4:38."

"Oh snap," she murmured and began to walk a little faster. After five of their eight minutes had passed, they reached the other side of the valley.

"How long does it take to get to the clearing?" Seras asked tentatively.

"Five minutes," responded Alucard glaring ahead.

"Oh…we're gonna be late."

"You slept too long!" he snapped at her.

Seras flinched back from him a bit. "You're not a morning person, are you?"

Alucard wheeled around to face her. "I'm a vampire, a creature of the NIGHT. I don't do frisking in a field of flowers while the sun rises." He answered somewhat angrily.

She nodded in response and they continued the rest of the way in silence. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence they began to hear a faint chopping noise. Seras looked up eagerly and began to walk faster as did Alucard. Another minute or so passed before they broke out of the last remaining trees and could see the helicopter. The pilot stood turned away from them and appeared to be looking around confusedly.

"We're here!" called Alucard loudly strolling up behind the pilot. The man turned around quickly and his tense face relaxed when he saw Alucard standing there.

"Ah, Seras. Good, good. I was just getting a tad concerned and it's a little disturbing to be so close to so many enemy vampires," he said giving a shaky smile and wiping his forehead with a handkerchief.

Alucard looked somewhat confused. "I'm not Ser…I mean good man!" he said.

Seras rolled her eyes. What happened to not letting them know?she asked sarcastically in his mind.

Oh shut up, Alucard,he replied. The three piled into the helicopter and the pilot slowly took off.

"How was it tonight, Alucard?" questioned the pilot with a hint of teasing in his voice.

"Fine," grouched Alucard. The pilot looked surprised.

"Er...how was your night Alucard?" he asked looking directly at Seras this time.

"I think Seras just about summed it up," she answered kindly.

And I'm the idiot, she snorted in his head.

Yup, confirmed Alucard yawning quietly, Now leave me alone. I'm tired. Seras watched as he slowly dropped off to sleep before letting the nights adventures drag her down too.

שּﭏשּ

The helicopter touched down gently on the roof of the Hellsing Manor. The pilot stretched then turned around to shake awake the two slumbering vampires. After many grumbles and two punches in the nose and eye he managed to rouse them.

"We're home," he sang cheerily. It had just turned eight o'clock and the sun was much too high for the vampires taste. (The pilot took the "scenic route". wink wink)

Alucard and Seras exchanged looks of determination. "You ready?" he asked his hands on the handle of the door. She nodded grimly. He took one more deep breath then threw open the door and both vampires sprinted across the roof to the door, yowling like a bunch of cats being murdered. Seras reached the door first and slammed into to it with surprising speed, but, unfortunately, she forgot to turn the handle before slamming. There was…er…a rather large Alucard shaped dent from the impact. Alucard rolled his eyes and quickly opened the door and disappeared into the cool, dark interior of the Hellsing manor. Seras got up and stumbled dazedly after him leaving the pilot doubled over with laughter.

"Ooooh," she moaned in a very Dane Cook like voice, "Who ever invented the sun sucks!" Alucard rolled his eyes again.

"Whatever," he grunted turning to walk down a flight of stairs. Seras hobbled after him. They strolled and hobbled down a long hallway before coming to a stop in front of Sir Integra's office.

"You sure she'll be up?" inquired Seras.

"Positive," responded Alucard sounding a lot happier then he had at the clearing. A little sleep does wonders for a man, thought Seras with wonder, watching the small smile on her master's face. The two entered the room to find Sir Integra eating a large breakfast.

"Hewoah," she beamed at them through a full mouth.

"That's repulsive," commented Alucard conversationally while Seras just eyed the egg that had fallen out of her mouth with disgust.

Integra glowered. "Vur repuvive," she accused. Alucard shook his head and Seras gave a small yip of surprise. Both Integra and Alucard gazed at her sharply.

"What now?" Alucard asked exasperatedly. Seras pointed wide-eyed to Integra's chestial (A/N: I made up a word!) area. Alucard looked very embarrassed for his fledgling.

"Not her boobs," snapped Seras crossly seemingly to hear the thoughts from the other to beings in the room, "Look. I made that piece of egg float with my mind. I did voo-doo!" Sure enough, the tiny scrap of egg that had fallen from Sir Integra's mouth was floating.

"Oh good job," remarked Alucard sarcastically rolling his eyes, "You've discovered ANOTHER one of my numerous powers. Kudos to you on that marvelous feat."

Seras blushed furiously. "Well, I'm not used to being able to do these things and being in your body."

"That is obvious," he retorted.

"Children please," broke in Integra with her best motherly/teacher voice, "No fights today."

Both vampires stared at her. "Uh…since when are we 'children'? I'm much older then you for one thing," commented Alucard slowly.

Integra shook her head quickly. "I'm sorry, Alucard. I'm just still a bit tired. I haven't had my coffee or morning cigar yet."

Alucard looked stunned, since when did Integra apologize for ANYTHING? Seras' voice interrupted his startled thoughts.

Or her morning shower, judging by the smell, she gagged (in her mind only of course or she would be dead and Alucard would be sobbing in the corner).

Alucard sniffed the air unobtrusively and sure enough a terrible smell wafted to him from Integra's general direction. He wrinkled his mental nose. That's disgusting.

Tell me about it.

Their mental banter was cut short by Integra speaking. "How was the Mating Grounds, Seras?" she asked politely.

"It was…..and adventure," responded Seras after some thought, "It was pretty interesting but not something I'll cherish doing for the rest of my life."

Integra smiled gently. "That's almost exactly what Alucard said after his first night," she remembered.

Alucard scowled. "It was not. I said that 'It was just about the most horrendous thing I had ever been put through and I just might figure out a way to kill myself and then perform it if I have to go again.' Big difference."

Integra rolled her eyes. "Well it had the same basic drift. And you didn't say it, you yelled it."

Now it was Alucard's turn to participate in the 'Eye-rolling Olympics'. Meanwhile, Seras snickered softly in the corner.

"What's your problem?" he snarled at her.

She appeared to be hiding her laughter with no affect. "Was poow-wittle Awucard scwad of de big, mean Mating Gwounds?" she asked in a mock-baby voice.

Alucard looked furious. "Why you little!" he yelled and pounced at her, managing to knock over Sir Integra's ashtray (A/N: How did he do that?!?!) on to said persons lap.

By this time Miss. Hellsing was a little more then annoyed. "ALUCARRRRRDD! SERASSSS!!!! GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!!!!!!!!" she screamed spit flying from her mouth and gray ashes sliding off the front of her suit.

The two vampires shut up immediately and fled the office as silver bullets began to pierce the ground behind them. Once the door slammed shut and the sound of a firing gun stopped ringing in their ears they turned and walked down the corridor side-by-side as if nothing had happened.

"Close call," said Seras in a voice that suggested she could have been talking about the weather.

"Ya," agreed Alucard in an equally nonchalant voice.

The two strolled casually down the hallway, their quarrel forgotten.

"So know what do we do?" asked Sears peering out a window and wincing when the sun ht her face.

"Well I don't know about you but I'm retreating to my…," began Alucard but Seras interrupted.

"Your secret lab?!" she exclaimed excitedly.

"Uh…no," said Alucard slowly.

"Oh…," she replied sounding extremely disappointed.

Alucard looked slightly disturbed and said "Er…" without moving his mouth. Seras began to grin widely and started skipping down the hall exclaiming the word whee! very loudly.

"Hormones," said a 'dignified' (for lack of a better word) voice behind him…er….her. He whirled around and saw something that made his heart stop. Pip stood there with a 'flirtatious' smirk on his face.

"Uh……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….."

Pip's grin never faltered. "You are looking particularly beautiful today," he drawled, "There's something different about you. I like it. You change your hair?"

"Er…no," stuttered Alucard his heart now beating very fast indeed. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. I hate this man…, he thought desperately.

"Eat a lot of blood? You have to help me out here," Pip said gesturing with his hands.

"No. Nothing different," said Alucard desperately feeling the air behind for hopes of finding a handy gun, sword, flowerpot, or weapon in general. Sir Integra had gotten too pissed to quickly to return the guns to the two vampires. (A/N: Haha. Too-1, to-3, and two- 1. Think about it. You'll figure it out.)

Pip sidled forward and put a hand right over Alucard's shoulder on the wall behind the said vampire and lent in close. "Well, whatever it is it's very sexy," he inhaled deeply, "You smell good," he leered at Alucard who trembled with fright.

"I gotta go," yelled Alucard suddenly smashing Pip's hand in his haste. The crazed vampire quickly ran away as casually as you can run for your life.

Pip cradled his now broken fingers and glared after the retreating figure. "Something's not right…," he murmured to himself, "Mark my words, vampire. I WILL MAKE YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH ME!" he then blushed deeply, "I mean, I'll find out what's different," he mumbled and turned and walked slowly away.

A/N: Sorry it took so long to post. I was busy with finals. Enjoy! Oh, and I reallllly need ideas for what to do to them so reviews telling me would be very much appreciated. And I didn't do anything for Pip's frenchness because I could not, for the life of me, figure out how to write it so corrections for that would be cool to. Toodles!