Title: Sweet Release
Summary: After him, no other man could satisfy the hunger the dark man left his lovers with. They called him Casanova. ShikaTema
Author: Bibliophile Nincompoop
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If I tell you I love you, can I keep you forever?
~Casper (The friendly ghost)
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Chapter 10: Stay With Me
Temari woke up that next morning sorer than she'd ever been in her life, but she felt amazing. They had stayed up till four in the morning with their love making starting at roughly nine, the woman who married him would be lucky indeed. Her heart wrenched at the thought, it screamed at her that she was being stupid that she should stay. But she knew better. How long would it be this time? A couple months, a year? Before he couldn't cope with the distance between them. Her home was Suna, her family was Suna, her duty was Suna. No matter how unfair it was, she had to go back.
Once she got out of the shower, having to scrub his intoxicating smell from her body, dressing and fixing her hair, she took her last glance at Casanova. It was a funny title for him, because that was the last thing anyone would give Konoha's number one laziest ninja. But he wasn't lazy last night, he made it magnificent for her. He was the first she agreed to make love to, she would treasure it forever. Especially since at home waited the signed contract for her hand in marriage to another. It wasn't fair, but since when has life been? Especially for her.
Shikamaru laid in bed, the goofiest of smiles adorning his enticing lips. Those lips that touched nearly every inch of her last night. It nearly made her cry thinking of what she was doing, she was leaving him. The man she had wanted since they battled in the arena during the exams. From that very damn day she admired him, cared for him, and grew to love him. Loved him with every inch of the frozen organ in her chest.
She sulked down the road to the gates, people bustling in their own little worlds all around her. Giving her great big smiles, and hellos. But she was dying, she could feel it. Her heart was suffocating her, shrinking into a ball and crying in the corner of her rib cage. She wanted to turn around, to run from her troubles in his strong arms. She wanted him that stupid idiot, pineapple head, crybaby! That wonderfully troublesome man. She didn't want him to reject her, not again. Who was she kidding? Certainly not herself. She wasn't leaving, she was running away. Not because of that stuffed shirt noble who was waiting to marry her. Not because of her duty, home or family! She was afraid.
Flashback Temari's Pov:
So I am going to tell him today. I am going to do. Oh I can't do it... Stop that you are Temari of the Desert feared by all, you are going to walk up to that big whiny ball baby and you're going to tell him you love him! Yea right... I may be blunt, but I'm no Naruto. I don't wear my feelings on my sleeves. How bout I just grab him by the collar and force him to love me? No, it doesn't work like that. Wouldn't it be great if it did? Most definitely.
I walked towards those big looming gates, they were supposed to be a sign of welcome and authority. But all they did was want to make me turn on my heels and run like hell because of what, or precisely who, waited for me there. He always complains about picking me up, though I can see in his eyes that he doesn't mind. But as I came closer, I noticed this wasn't the case today.
As soon as I came close enough he turned around and walked on without me. What the hell did I do? "Hey what's up your ass?"
Damn it Temari! Don't you think you should be nice to the guy your going to confess your undying fucking love to?
He scowled at me, his chest heaving slightly. He was angry or upset, one of those two. I've only seen him like this a couple of times, all of them ended badly. "We need to talk."
Ino had told me about those four words, that they were a no fly zone. They were the flashing red light that indicated danger for couples. Well I am stupid enough to enjoy danger because my big mouth went off and said, "Ok sure."
We walked over to my hill, I loved it because of the thousands of wildflowers that just made me smile, not to mention that's where Shikamaru first kissed me and asked me out. I loved it how forward he was, it was very unlike him. Shikamaru loved the hill because he could watch the clouds, I didn't mind watching them. I prefer the stars. But for him, if he liked wrestling alligators or catching butterflies, I would do it. Though the wrestling alligators sounds pretty fun...
I promptly laid down taking in a deep breath of the fresh Konoha air, but he didn't sit with me. He stood watching those puffy clouds sail across the sky. In a way they reminded me of 'us'. He was the lazy cloud, and I was the wind who pushed him along. I love him, how nice it is to say that. I love him with every inch of my body, no matter what mood he was in or what bad habit he had, I love him. And now I have to suck up my pride and tell him.
"We shouldn't see each other anymore." He said not even bothering to look at me.
"What?" I couldn't say anything more, my heart just shattered in my chest, and my brain was mocking me telling me how stupid I am. I am too stunned to even let the tears that are drowning inside of me flood my face. My face was calm and collected, just as it always is.
"I said.."
I cut him off, "I know what you said, I just want to know why."
He stood there for a moment, still looking up and away from me. I just want to hit him, hurt him! Make him feel this pain that was tearing me apart. I am so stupid! Letting him in. Telling him my desires, my hopes and dreams. I hate him, I hate him more than I've ever hated someone. Even more than my bastard of a father, a feat I thought no one could beat.
He took in a deep breath and slowly released it, was he preparing himself? For what me punching him till he was unrecognizable, well too freaking late bud! "It's the distance. I can't be with a woman who I hardly see. Common sense and logic would tell any sane person that it wouldn't work out. Right?"
I stood up, I am going to pummel him till he has to breath out his ears and talk through his ass. But that's not what I did, stupid big mouth. "You're right. It wouldn't work out, well it was fun while it lasted. Right?"
He turned to me his face was edged as if he was holding back something... Is there someone else, it's probably Ino. Yeah sure Shikamaru I'm more beautiful that her, damn liar. I'm biased, look at me I am lying to him right now. It could work out, love always finds a way or at least in the stories it did. Unless this love was one sided. All those smiles and chaste kisses he gave me, rare and a lie. "Yeah, it was."
"Are you okay Shikamaru?" I asked after all he had changed since Asuma died... I could always smell the faint alcohol on him probably because my dear ol' dad was a slobbering drunk and the smell makes me sick, but I never said anything. He smoked those cigarettes as if they were candy, one after another. I hadn't kissed him since he picked up the nasty habit. Nearly four months ago.
He just scoffed putting another death stick in his mouth, lighting it up. "Never better."
I quickly looked around at the wild flowers covering the hill, the once luster they held in my eyes gone. The colors dulled, the aroma turning putrid, it lost it's magic. No. I lost the magic. "Is that it? Is this why you made me travel three days for? Just so you could break up with me?"
He took a big inhale of the cigarette closing his eyes tightly together almost as if her were in pain and muttered a simple, "Yes."
"Then I will be going back home." I began walking away when I felt his presence beside me. I forced myself to stand straight and proud, though the pain in my chest was enough to force me to my knees. "What do you want?"
"I'm still your guide." He didn't dare look down at me, but I did to him. I could see the small condensation stuck to his lashes, tears. But there were not enough to make me pity him, it just made me hate him more. That damn cigarette smoke got into my eyes and made them water, or that's at least I told myself.
I walked ahead of him, so he couldn't see almost my watering eyes. I was almost out of the gates when I paused. "If it's unfavorable to see me, then tell the Hokage to assign someone else."
"No." Shikamaru's voice almost pleaded. I turned to see him glaring at me as if I had done this! If I were the one who tore our perfectly fine and happy relationship apart! His eyes went dull the slight glimmer gone. "I enjoy your company still, have a pleasant trip Miss. Sabuko."
I could have cried right then and there, oh how I wanted to. How he could he do that to me!? Act as if he didn't even know me! Act as if he didn't just break my heart! But thankfully my stupid body held it in, all that pain. "They never are, but for some reason I looked forward to them." His jaw tighten as if I had just punched him. Good you damn bastard. "Gaara took me off of my ambassador duties last year, he told me I didn't need to do such a boring and useless job. So if you don't see me next you'll know why. Farewell Shikamaru Nara."
I left, knowing I had just left him with a pain. No matter how little, I let him feel the pain that I gave up my dreams of being a full fledged ninja protecting my country to talk to the old bities just to see him. Good. At first I left the village walking slowly hoping that my pineapple head would be the man I knew he was, to call after me tell me to come back that he was a stupid idiot genius. But it never came, and as soon as the that damn village was out of sight I ran. I ran till the tears trailed behind me rather than falling on my face. I ran till my body collapsed sobbing against a tree at the border of Land of Wind and Fire.
"Stupid bastard." I forced my body to stop it's nonsense, what point was there to cry over someone who who... Oh who am I kidding! I love that damn crybaby! I love him so much I hate him!
"I hope you weren't talking about us." I whipped around quickly pulling my fan to my side even faster. I was surrounded and out numbered.
End of flashback.
So there she stood again, those looming gates still mocking her. She walked out of them, set to never come back.
Shikamaru woke up yawning and stretching like a cat, the smile still stuck smugly on his face. A night without nightmares and filled with dreams of his woman was a good night indeed. He reached over to grab his beautiful blonde and pull her near, but all he had was a handful of empty sheet. The leaf ninja shot up looking around quickly, Temari's clothes were gone and his were thrown in the hamper. He got out of bed and looked into the bathroom the condensation from her hot shower still stuck to the mirror. He quickly made his way to the living room, still butt naked. She wasn't there and neither was her bag, and the door was unlocked. His genius mind working at full speed, it finally clicked and the shadow user quickly ran back to the bedroom slipping on clothes not caring if they were dirty or clean and bolted down the dirt street to the gates.
Don't leave me woman, don't leave me!
He shoved through the people on the streets all looking at him curiously all following him with their eyes, until everyone watched the Nara heir running down the streets like a lunatic. She couldn't leave him not again! He was overcome by pain and hurt when he sent her away the last time, he was stupid. Stupid stupid stupid! Shikamaru ran even faster watching a sole figure already far away from the gates. He couldn't leave without permission, the two guards at the gate stopped him as soon as he came barrelling out.
"TEMARI!" His scream echoed throughout the entire village, even making the woman on the beaten path look in astonishment, but she made her way back to the large gates just close enough to tell him that this was goodbye, but the words wouldn't come out. "You damn troublesome woman! Where the hell do you think you're going?"
She growled at him, anger obviously poisoned in her voice, "Last time I checked I didn't need your permission to home!"
"Well your my troublesome woman, and you're staying here." He said in finality, this sent whispers through the enormous crowd that watched them.
The blonde woman glared at him, if looks could kill Shikamaruwould be poached eggs right now. "I don't belong to you! I'm no one's damn property!"
Shikamaru got down on his knee, thankfully his mom had beat it into him that a woman likes romance. So this was the least he could do. And praise whoever was looking over him with a smile, the young Nara was wearing the pants he did last night. He pulled out the delicate silver ring, holding it up to her. "You will if you say yes."
Most of the women gushed at this, but Temari just wanted to sock him. Kiss him. Cry. But most of all beat the crap out of him. "You're two years to late Shikamaru, I'm getting married to someone else."
He got to his feet and walked towards her, the guards pushing him back, "Shikamaru, you're not allowed to leave without permission from the Hokage."
"He has my permission." The blonde peered around the gate obviously spying on the couple as well.
Shikamaru continued towards her not saying anything. It frightened Temari to no end, she'd never seen him look like this before it made her want to rip her heart out. "Get away from me Nara. Please."
He grabbed her and pulled her tightly to his body, holding onto her if she were his raft out at sea. "You won't leave me again, troublesome woman. I love you too much to let you leave. I didn't run after you that day, though I wanted to so badly. I learn from my mistakes. Will you marry me? Be my troublesome woman until you yell at me to death?"
"I... I ca..." She rested her head on his shoulder wanting nothing more than to run away with him. But her duty, her home, her family, her fear...
"Stay with me." He pleaded his grip only getting tighter.
"I can't." Temaripushed him away her eyes hard, his face was heartbreaking. It was if she stomped on his heart squashing it into the ground and spiting on it. He loved her, more so now than ever before. The realization made her heart flutter and her soul soar. She smiled ever so lightly, "Until you ask my brother's permission."
Shikamaru smiled from ear to ear swooping her up in his arms and spinning her around kissing her everywhere on her face. A thundering of applause erupted from the crowd, and many whistles pitched to their passionate kiss.
But Temari pushed away again, "My brothers are still pissed at you."
Shikamaru pulled her in for another kiss. "They'll get over it."
Like a yo-yo she pushed back, "I mean when they see you they'll decapitate you and feed you your intestines like spaghetti."
"Will you be quiet troublesome woman." He forced her back into her arms and kissed her silent.
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Ok let me hear it 'AWWWWWWW!'. I am such a big baby here I am writing this chapter since I posted the new chapter for A Thousand Year War, crying because I can imagine myself as Temari going through all this crap. I am a crybaby.
Yes only one more chapter of the story. That makes me want to cry too! :'(
As always my faithful readers if I screwed up and spelt things wrong or something doesn't make sense tell me, I was crying to much to see the screen correctly.
