I decided to just make the chapter longer.
BPOV:
I lied there on the cold ground, willing my body to sink into it and disappear. I wanted the ground to wrap its self around me and pull me in deep creating my own grave.
I was damaged goods. He was going to take one look at me and shake his head in disgust. I envisioned him looking down at me, a mess. Disappointment would fill his eyes and he would spit on me because I was worthless to him now. 'A waste, what a waste he would say' before kicking some more dirt onto me.
I just stared at nothing in particular allowing these visions to fully engulf me. "Lord, I don't want him to even find me" I said to myself in a low whisper.
It grew darker where I laid and normally fear would overcome me but I welcome the dark. Let the dark take away any vision from me, I want to see nothing, I want to feel nothing, and I want to be nothing.
I heard their calls around me, and I made no attempt to bring them closer to me. I wished their screams would grow fainter letting me know they were moving further away until they deceased all together letting me know that they gave up.
That's exactly what would happen. Edward would come home and assume that I ran away. He would be angry and do his best to find me but eventually he would give up. He would be disappointed that he has to find another but he would and then who knows maybe one day they may stumble upon my body in this same position only to sign and keep walking.
My name didn't grow fainter; it grew louder and fiercer. I may have cringed if I had actually cared.
And then there he was.
I felt his presence around me; I didn't need to look up to know he stood only a few feet away from me.
His hand pawed at my face I wanted to move into it but I remained still. My hair was being removed from my face where it clung to my cheeks and lips. I hadn't even noticed.
My God spoke to me, "Bella, What are you doing?" he said.
I wanted to laugh, what was I doing? I wanted to but I didn't. I thought to myself 'play dead, Bella' 'make it easier for everyone and just play dead' 'he'll lay you back down on the ground and you can continue like this tills it over'.
I couldn't help the raspy breath that escaped me. My throat was dry and ached but I wallowed in the pain of it using it as the only thing to concentrate on.
He pulled me into his arms and I wanted to curl up into a ball like that and just cry. I wanted to sob so hard that my body shook and he had to hold me even tighter to keep me still.
I didn't, though. I just lay limp in his lap and allowed him to stroke my hair until I heard the rumble in his chest against my ear.
I would have looked up but I knew what was happening. This is where he realizes that his pet has been used up. He made such a noise because anger had finally hit him, he was angry because someone had broken his new toy. 'Poor baby' I thought to myself, we all know what that's like.
EPOV:
Yes, the anger was rippling through my body like tidal wave. I have never felt such anger and pain as I did this moment.
Pain, I didn't know why that emotion was rearing its disgusting little head; I pushed the emotion deeper into myself.
I wanted to hurt anyone and everyone that came near me; I wanted some how to get the hurt out of my body.
I needed to focus on my Bella.
I scooped her limp body into my arms, she was like a doll.
My little porcelain doll had been cracked and I wasn't sure if there was a way to fix her.
I turned towards the house facing Emmitt and his pet. I held her close to my chest and marched past them. I had nothing to say to them.
I quickened my walk as I neared the house until I felt like I was in a slight jog.
I just wanted to get her in the house.
I kicked the front door open, not bothering my hands to open it for me. I didn't care if the door remained open, there was no threat outside, if there was any threat it resided in this house.
Let someone else close it, I was on a set course.
I walked through the hallways nearing my room when I heard it.
Jaspers door was silently closing shut and I could hear him turn the locks from the inside.
My anger surfaced again wanting to set Bella down and kick his door in. I felt so invincible at that moment with the anger that backed me up no lock could save him.
I would wait though, as badly as I wanted to settle the score my angel was lying in my arms and I needed to focus on her.
I walked her into my room and placed her on the bed and swiftly moved back to my door. I had multiple locks placed on the door but I hardly ever used them until tonight. No one would enter. 'God help the person who tries to come in here' I thought.
I looked back at her, she hadn't moved. My legs carried me to the bathroom door where I dipped in and began to run the warm water in the tub.
She needed to be cleaned, she must feel so dirty. I needed to clean him off of her if I was going to be able to continue in anyway.
I left the bathroom with the warm water still running. It would take a few minutes to fill so I had a moment to step away.
I walked once more towards the bed where my fallen angel lied.
She was still so beautiful. If I had any worries in me that I would not longer the melted away once I saw her figure on the bed. I still wanted her.
I wanted her more then I had ever before and I couldn't explain to myself why.
I wanted to scoop her into my arms and kiss the top of her head while cooing her to sleep.
There was no rage in my body that looked towards Bella.
The only rage I had was for Jasper.
I just couldn't place what would drive him to act on such an impulse. We were brothers and there was an understanding there.
I had never touched his small pixie of a pet; I never had any desire to. I understood that she belonged to him and she was his alone.
But now, I spit on his name. I want nothing more then to beat him senseless until the image of her body and the feeling of her is wiped clean from his mind.
If his plan was to have me be so disgusted with Bella afterwards that I would throw her into his direction then was sadly mistaken.
It wasn't like that, she would never belong to him and he would never feel her again I would put everything I had into making sure that was understood.
I traced a finger over her cheek to see if I could get some kind of response out of her but she gave me nothing.
Her clothes were hardly there anymore so I removed them and lifted her into my arms once more.
I slowly lowered her body into the tub making sure not to shock her with it all at once.
I turned the knobs over the tub off and kneeled beside the tub so that I could look at her. She looked like a small child and my chest hurt from the comparison.
She sat in the tub looking forward at the wall so I reached my hand up once more to stroke her cheek.
"Bella my sweet Bella" I cooed.
I took her cheek in the palm of my hand and turned her head gently so that she faced me. Her eyes remained cast down so with the tip of my finger I lifter her chin so her eyes had to meet mine.
Finally, her eyes met mine. She said nothing, nor did she make a move.
Quiet tears began to roll over the brim making their way down her cheek only to fall into the bath water.
My heart shattered at this site.
The pain I had caused her mixed with this most recent incidents alarmed me, I didn't know if I could bring her back from this.
Had she been pushed too far?
I watched her tears role down her eyes but I said nothing, I just gave her the chance to cry for the first time since it happened.
I found a wash cloth and wiped her face as she cried. I washed her hair, arms, legs, stomach; I washed him off of her.
