"The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it." –Richard Bach

Their eyes meet, connecting as she utters a single syllable, and suddenly there is nothing more to say. She supposes she could become angry and blame him for making her annual holiday retreat an utter failure, but to a larger extent this predicament is her fault as she was the one who grabbed and kissed him in the first place. Of course, he had been the one to slip his tongue into her mouth, capturing the gum he had declined just seconds earlier and prompting her to respond with equal ardor.

Either way, the truth is now unavoidable, and all of the emotions play out between them without a word being spoken. Slowly, she nods, accepting both that she now understands his compulsive need to care for her this time and that any further attempts to dissuade him will be denied, and at the same time agreeing that their feelings are a topic they will not discuss. She allows him to "make" her eat the frozen yogurt he bought and laughs along with him at the pre-adolescent adventure movie he has brought; though she thinks it highly unlikely that pirates would have buried treasure in Oregon and finds several disturbing inaccuracies with the skeletal remains that the children encounter. When the movie is over, he makes sure she takes another dose of the oral steroid for her rash and instructs her to call if she needs anything further even though they both know she will not.

She eventually recovers and life goes on and the list of things that they do not talk about begins to grow: the double date they both enjoyed going on with Sweets, the shared cabin he envisioned complete with a large television, the utter agony she went through when she thought he was dead. Denial covers them like a warm blanket, that invisible line protecting them from ruining what neither one of them can live without.

Years pass and the shared moments come and go and they slowly evolve. He becomes more open, letting her into the darkest corners of his life that he has hidden from others. She becomes more trusting, developing a faith in him that makes her wonder if perhaps the reasoned arguments that she has had in place since she was fifteen warrant re-evaluation and change. He dreams of a life with her by his side raising a family while she keeps vigil, writing of burdens that will allow them to fly. And the dance goes on, and the Christmases come and go.

"Thanks for the party, Bones," he tells her long after her other guests have left. "You did a good thing celebrating Christmas for your cousin."

She thinks about Margret's advice and says softly, "I didn't do it for her."

Eyebrows rise over chocolate brown eyes, searching for the true meaning behind her words. "No?"

Her teeth unconsciously capture her bottom lip as she shakes her head.

"I didn't want you to be alone for Christmas," she explains, "to think that you weren't…"

Their eyes meet and he realizes what she is telling him and he places a calloused finger on her lips before stepping forward and capturing them with his own. She is as warm and soft as he remembers and he revels in the sensation of tasting and being tasted. Her mind wonders for a brief second if this kiss is the carrier of a disease like the last one, but pushes the thought aside; knowing that if it is they will care for one another just as they always have. Denial crashes down around them and they let it fall along with the line that was never really necessary.

His kisses stray off of her mouth, following her jaw line until they reach her ear, "I love you too, Bones."

FIN.


Thanks again to doctorsuez for the idea and the medical advice. Hope this was the non-cliche flu-fic she was hoping for. I had fun and I thank you all for joining me on the ride and reviewing as we went. See, it wasn't that hard, was it? ;)

Ah well, it'll be weeks 'til we'll see a new Bones so I know they'll be more of these little tales to come until then; though even the most obsessed writer will take a break for Christmas. (gotta carve out time to watch Booth- I mean Bones- on Blu-ray, ya know)

Merry Christmas to all (and Happy Festivus for the rest)!

Gum :)