Disclaimer: Still don't own 'em.

I woke up with a pounding headache. I guess I had too much to drink last night, but it was still a great night. Elliot's arm is still wrapped around me, and my head is buried in his chest, such an incredible feeling. He must've sensed that I was awake, because his arm tightened around my waist, and a small smile crept on his face. I softly kissed him, and he opened his eyes,

"Mmm, good morning to you, too beautiful."

"Sleep well?" I ask with a cocky smirk on my face.

"Yeah, actually I did. I got good news last night."

"And that would be?"

"That the woman I am in love with feels the same about me. " He said with a cheesy grin.

"Oh, and who might this lucky lady be?" With that, he rolled on top of me and pulled me into a bruising kiss. This one was much different than last nights. This was not tentative or hesitant, but passionate and loving. He caressed my lips with his, and traced my lips with his tongue, asking for entry. I gladly accepted, and our tongues fought for dominancy.

"Does that answer your question Detective?"

"Why, I believe so, Stabler."

"Do you smell that?" Elliot asked while sniffing the air.

"Coffee." We both jump out of bed and run into the kitchen. Kathleen was slaving over the stove, and as we suspected, the coffee was brewing.

"Kathleen? What are you doing sweetie?" She looked like she was making pancakes. If she cooks anything like her father, we're in good hands. That's right everyone, Elliot Stabler can COOK.

"Well, I thought I would make you two love birds breakfast. I made pancakes, sausage, bacon, and hash browns. Biscuits are in the oven." She said with a smile of accomplishment.

"Good god, thank you but you didn't have to do all of that" I say while nodding towards the buffet spread out on the table.

"Well, it was the least I could do. Liv, I am so glad that dad finally grew the balls to tell you he loved you."

El just blushed, and it made me laugh.

"Well, how about I repay you by taking you on a shopping trip today; I need a new dress for the NYPD Christmas Ball."

"Liv, that's like a month away, why do you need a dress now?"

"Ugh," Kathleen and I said in unison.

"What! " Elliot defensively threw his hands up in the air.

"It takes us a little more time to prepare. We can't just throw on whatever's clean and expect to look good. It doesn't work like that dad." Kathleen said with a roll of her eyes.

"El, where's Dickey and Lizzie?" I ask while looking around the room.

"Oh, they left for some week-long camp or something with my sister."

"Oh, well, Kath, what do you say we clean up this mess and get ready to leave huh?"

"Yeah, thanks Liv."

We get dressed and head off to the store, and Kathleen breaks the silence,

"So, you know, my dad has loved you for a long time. All my mom and dad did was fight. And I love my mom, but I love you too. You're like my second mother."

"Aw, thanks Kath. I love you too, like a daughter." Hearing Kathleen say that brought tears to my eyes, I knew the Stabler kids were somewhat fond of me, but not that much. We pulled up to the boutique, and walked inside.
"Oh my god, Liv, look at that dress." It was red, and went to my knees. It was strapless, but other than that, simple.

"It's beautiful." I had to admit, I looked damn sexy in it.

"That dress will knock my dad on his ass." Kathleen looked at me to see how I would react to her language. I had never heard her curse before, not that I cared really, after all, she was seventeen. And believe me; I was saying worse at twelve.

"Ha, it better, it's expensive."

I let Kathleen pick out a dress for the dance, and we went to check out. We went to a few other stores, and got a few more things, and then we headed home…or Elliot's house rather. But I had a feeling I would be spending a lot of time there. When we walked in, I was greeted by a kiss on the forehead, and a smile,

"Hello ladies. How did it go?"

"Great, Liv, go try on your dress, and I'll try on mine."

"Kay, El we'll be right back."

"Wait, Liv you mean I can't help you get dressed?" Elliot smirked. I felt my face turn eight shades of red, while Kathleen just laughed as she continued to walk to her room.

"Ha, in your dreams." I called over my shoulder as I followed Kathleen. She needed me to help zip her dress, as I needed her to help me with mine.

"Wow," Elliot stared in shock when we returned;" you guys look great." Kathleen's dress was a light blue with studded straps, and a bow around the waist. We twirled around a few times, and then went back to take them off.

Later that night, Kathleen left with a friend to go to a birthday party, so El and I were by ourselves.

"Want something for dinner?" Elliot asked me, I have to admit, I was hungry.

"Uh, Yeah. Thanks."

He called the Chinese place down the street, and returned to the sofa. He flipped through the channels for a few minutes before the delivery man came to the door. He got up, paid, and came back to the sofa.

"So," I say, starting a conversation, "do you have a date to the NYPD dinner?" I ask, knowing the answer. He has always taken Kathy, and well now, because she's out of the picture, I am curious. I usually went with Alex because neither she nor I had dates, so we just rode together. Fin always had a different girl, as well as Munch. Casey went with Don every year.

"No, do you?" What an idiot. He knew better.

"Yeah right, Stabler. You know me better than that."

"You want to go with me?" Finally, that is what I was getting at. Of course I wanted to go with him.

"Yeah, I'd like that."

We chatted about everything from work to Yankee's games. Knowing we both had work tomorrow, he drove me to my apartment.

"Night, Livvy. Pick you up at 7?"

"Yeah, bring coffee. Night El."

He kissed my cheek and I got out. He always makes me flick my lights when I get to my apartment so he knows I'm alright. I like to stress him out a little so sometimes I don't, and he comes up with his gun drawn. It's pretty funny if you ask me. It's nice to know he cares about me though. No one ever has before, well unless you can consider Don. He is like the father I never had. And well, Casey and Alex are my best friends, but that's different. Munch and Fin are like my big brothers, but no one has ever cared about me like my partner/best friend/in-my-dreams-lover has. And for that, I am grateful. I put on a NYPD sweat set, and turn on my iPod dock. The first song gets me to thinking about Elliot.


I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly, madly, deeply do
I will be strong I will be faithful
'cause I'm counting on you

A new beginning
A reason for living
A deeper meaning
I want to stand with you a mountain
I want to bathe with you in the sea
I want to lay like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me

And when the stars are shining brightly in thevelvet sky
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry
The tears of joy for all the certainty
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of

The highest powers
In lonely hours
The tears devour you

I want to stand with you a mountain
I want to bathe with you in the sea
I want to lay like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me

Oh can you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'cause it's standing right here before you
All that you need will surely come

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly, madly, deeply do

I want to stand with you a mountain
I want to bathe with you in the sea
I want to lay like this forever
Until the sky falls down on me

The song brings tears to my eyes. I want to be with him, I want him to hold me. I need him; I need him to be with me. I start thinking about my childhood, about my mother, and my rapist father, the one I never knew. I start thinking about how my mom loved Jack Daniel's more than me. I get up, and walk to the kitchen. I stand on my tippy-toes to reach the bottle of Jack Daniel's. When I drink from this, I feel like a hypocrite. I feel like I will become my mother. However, I have people around me that care that will get me out of any mess I manage to get in. I get my favorite glass from the cabinet, and pour my first one. I swirl it around a few times before downing it. And then another, and another. By now I am bawling. I can't hold it in. I badly need him. His kiss began an addiction to him. I could always control my impulses, but not now. He opened a door that he cannot shut. Even though we have to work, even though we have to get up, and even though it's now one in the morning, I consider calling him. The next song on my shuffle list makes up my decision…

Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor
Reachin' for the phone cause I can't fight it anymore
And I wonder if I ever crossed your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Another shot of whiskey can't stop looking at the door
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
To me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothin at all

It's a quarter after one I'm all alone and I need you now

And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now

And I don't know how I can do without

I just need you now

I just need you now

Ooo, baby, I need you now

"Mmm, Stabler." He answers, still half asleep. I attempt to reply, but I only sob.

"Oh, god Livvy, what's wrong?" I hear the concern grow in his voice. He is probably thinking a million and one things now.

"I…I…oh god…I need you El. I need you to hold m…m…meee. Please." I couldn't have sounded more pathetic, but my entire life was catching up to me, and he was the only one who could save me.

"Baby, I'm on my way. Stay put. Liv, I love you, please, don't go anywhere."

Baby? I love you? All these things come at me at once. My head is spinning, and I pour myself another glass of whiskey.

"Please hurry, El. I need you now."

He loves me? He truly loves me? No, he must've just been saying that because of the situation. I can't get my hopes up. I've done that all of my life. I always get my hopes up, and I get my heart broken. Since the day I was born, I have avoided setting myself up for heartbreak, but I always fall in. I always do it to myself, so I didn't want to believe he meant that he loved me. There was just no way. My though processes were interrupted by the front door opening.

Songs:

I Wanna Stand With You (Truly, Madly, Deeply) – Savage Garden

I Need You Now- Lady Antebellum

New chapter coming soon. PleasePleasePlease, Press the pretty green button below this.