Why You Should Not Trust Emmet as a Babysitter
Chapter V
Written by: AllApologies451994
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight, any of its characters, or the songs Break (TDG), Come as You Are (Nirvana), or Kill All Your Friends (MCR).
Emmet was mad. Renesmee had just awoken from her nap and decided she wanted to sing along (loudly) to every song that she knew the words to. This is what it was like:
"BREAK
AWAY FROM EVERYBODY
BREAK
AWAY FROM EVERYTHING
IF YOU CAN'T STAND THE WAY THIS PLACE IS
TAKE YOURSELF TO HIGHER PLACES"
To:
"COME AS YOU ARE
AS YOU WERE
AS I WANT YOU TO BE
AS A FRIEND
AS A FRIEND
AS I KNOW, AN ENEMY"
To:
"WELL YOU CAN HOLLER LOUD ABOUT YOURSELF
BUT HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?
AND YOU CAN SLEEP IN A COFFIN BUT THE PAST AIN'T THROUGH WITH YOU
'CAUSE WE ARE ALL A BUNCH OF LIARS
TELL ME BABY
WHO DO YOU WANNA BE?
AND WE ARE ALL ABOUT TO SELL IT 'CAUSE IT'S TRAGIC WITH A CAPITAL 'T'
LET IT BE
LET IT BE
LET IT BE"
And so on. His family had been gone for two days now. He was beginning to wonder why they had been gone so long. Maybe it was a punishment for something he done. Maybe they all got eaten by the pope. It's untelling, but he didn't like what was going on. As Renesmee finished the last notes of the chorus to "Kill All Your Friends" by MCR, she walked up to Emmet.
"I"m bored."
"Too bad."
"What can I do for fun around here?"
"You can... NO! DON'T DO THAT!" In case you're wondering why the sudden outburst, she held up a turtle getting ready to throw at his head. But, he said this too late, for the turtle was already on top of his head. He grabbed and it threw it so hard against the wall it shattered. Now, you may be asking yourself; How do you shatter a turtle? Don't ask me, or anyone else, because no one may ever know. And if you do know, congratulations; you're a nerd. And just a note: It was NOT ceramic and he did NOT have any liquid nitrogen (someone on Mibba told me that and I never thought about it. So there you go.)
So, Renesmee had began to wonder around, looking for something fun to do. She ran into Emmet's room, and found a laptop just lying there. Of course, she didn't KNOW it was a laptop. So she ran back to where Emmet was and plopped it on his lap.
"What's this?"
"Something you don't need."
"Why don't I need it?"
"It's the internet. The internet is the Devil's playground. Bad stuff is on there." It was not to his surprise that she had opened it anyways and figured out how to turn it on. He just sighed and let her go on her own way. It wasn't his fault he couldn't control the munchkin.
He was also not surprised when she figured out how to open up the icons and type things. She's a super awesome ninja hybrid, so he knew she could do stuff like that. Even if she was only a week old.
She got on the internet and opened up . She typed in Renesmee Cullen and got a TON of results. Wondering why, she opened up one. It was talking about this book called "Breaking Dawn", where a vampire (Edward Cullen), and a human (Isabella Swan), got married and had a child. Edward then turned Isabella, or Bella as she liked to be called, into a vampire herself and they lived happily ever after.
"Well huh. This is weird; it's like they know what all happened to my life. Hey Emmet! Come check this out!"
Emmet walked in to see she was looking at a book called Breaking Dawn on (that was the link she opened, by the way).
"Emmet! It's like they know what all happened in our lives! Look!"
He took it and read the summary. He gasped; someone had been stalking them and writing about their personal lives, publishing them in a book! Suddenly, out of nowhere, a lady came out of nowhere. She just sorta 'poofed' into the room, I guess you could say.
"I'm going to need to see that." She just grabbed the laptop and clicked off of the page they were on.
"Was it you who was stalking us? Who wrote all our lives in a book?"
"Well yea. And it's not just ONE book; it's 4. I'm working on the 5th right now."
Renesmee sighed.
"We're breaking the fourth wall too much. Can we just go on and pretend this never happened?"
Emmet and the lady (who was actually Stephenie Meyer), agreed. So, the lady 'poofed' back out of the room and Emmet materialized another random GameInformer. Renesmee went back to the couch and sat down, acting as though nothing ever happened.
A/N: Thank you to all my readers/commenters/subscribers! And I hope you've enjoyed this little chapter. And just to get this out of the way: I do NOT own Break by Three Days Grace, Come as You Are by Nirvana, or Kill All Your Friends by MCR. So, if you see something wrong in my info/lyrics, comment and tell me how to fix that. Remember, if you review I'll love you forever :)
