A/N- Told you, you wouldn't have to wait too long this time ^_^ I really felt the need to hurry and wrap things up. I feel very much accomplished, it has been almost a year, and to think that when I started this story, all I had in mind was Ayase sitting alone in the bathtub, lol.
Thank you so much for reading, reviewing and enjoying this story. I really hope you liked it. If you have constructive criticism to share, I'd be happy to hear from you.
Here we are, at the last chapter. I think I am not very good at endings, it always gets too sugary and sappy… oh well… here we go.
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Paper plans
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Better to love and lose
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A life without Kanou-san, Ayase could not even begin to imagine it. He did not remember much of that horrible day when he was put on an auction, he remembered very little and even that little was enough to wake him up screaming every once in a while.
What he remembered most was the humiliation, of being completely nude under a spotlight, on a stage, his private organs on a shameful display for anyone in the audience to see, inspect, and desire. He remembered his helplessness and despair and how he longed for death to hurry up and take him.
However, he was not taken by death that night, he was taken by a beast of a man, a powerful man that scared the hell out of him, who raped him on their very first hour together, a man that cannot control his impulses, a man that takes what he wants when he wants it, regardless of consequences, Kanou-san.
Yet, Kanou-san clumsy as he was has always taken care of him, he always tried his best to keep him safe and happy even though he got the opposite results more than once, he truly tried his best.
A life without Kanou-san could have been a nightmare. God only knows where he would have ended up, if it weren't for Kanou. He could have been sold to a brothel where they would force him to have sex with thousands of strangers. He could fall to the hands of a sadistic maniac like that Hayate guy, and being tortured to death or worse- insanity. He could have ended up with a cannibal that could eat him piece by piece. He could have ended up at the hands of a person that shoots snuff films for a hobby.
The world was full of darkness, full of evil, and Ayase was not a naïve little thing anymore, he knew that the world outside was lurking with monsters, and since he was abnormally beautiful, he knew that he was their favorite prey.
In that kind of world, he was presented as an item for sale. In that kind of world Kanou-san was a knight in shinny armor, a savior, a guardian angle, and only a random stroke of luck placed Ayase safe in his hands.
A life without Kanou was unthinkable, miserable, unbearable, but they might have already begun.
Ayase set near the window, looking at the pouring rain outside, last night events came rushing through his brain like a silent movie. He remembered the police headlights swirling in the dark; he remembered the firefighters rushing into the burning building, and the paramedics that hurried to Kanou's side to fight for his life.
He remembered that people tried talking to him, ask him questions, but he could not answer back. At the end, somebody put a blanket on his shivering body and drove him here to the hospital. They said he was running a fever and that he was in a state of shock, but they could not understand that the world without Kanou was frozen and mute.
A knock on the door, Ayase did not dare to look. A doctor came in; he watched her reflection on the window hovering against the darkness outside, in her white robes she looked like a ghost.
"Ayase-san…" She said with a soft voice.
'Don't speak!' he wanted to scream at her, 'don't you get it? Those words will crush my world, don't pronounce them, let me world stay as it is!'
But she did not hear his silent plea. "I have news about Kanou-san."
'I don't want to hear it!' Ayase screamed in his mind, in reality he just gulped and shrunk on his seat.
"Kanou-san survived the surgery… we'll keep him sedated a while longer, to let him recover, but in a couple of days we will begin the process of waking him up."
What? What was she saying? Did his ears mislead him?
"He shows good signs of recovery, but we won't take any chances, and he does need his rest…"
"Se…Sensei?"
"Naturally, he's not allowed any visitors at this point of time so…"
"Sensei, Kanou-san… lives?"
The doctor smiled at him, this time she looked like an angel. "Yes, sir, Kanou survived. He is one of the strongest persons I've ever met."
"Kanou lives!" Ayase jumped from his seat and hugged the doctor, he began crying intensely and the poor doctor blushed with embracement.
"Young sir… young sir, please."
"Thank you! Thank you so very much!" Ayase released the physician, sobbing still.
"Well, I'm only doing my job, sir. Did your doctor come to check up on you?"
"Yes, he gave me my meds."
"Good." the doctor petted him on his head; she could not resist his cuteness. "I'll be going now." She said, "I'll keep you posted on Kanou's status so as soon as he could have visitors, you'd be the first to know."
"Thank you, Sensei." Ayase said, sniffing.
She stopped at the door and turned to him "Speaking of visitors, you have quite a line-up out there, should I chase them off?"
"No, no, let them in." Ayase said, overwhelmed with this sudden joy.
"Two at the time." she ordered.
"Ok."
Must have been a bit of a battle outside, because the first two guests were shoved into the room, looking a little angrily at the outside, but once their eyes lay on Ayase their frown turned into a warm smile.
"Ayase-kun, there you are!" Mie-chan hugged him tightly and then slapped him on his face.
"Ouch, Mie-chan, what was that for?" the blonde rubbed his hurting cheek.
"That was for getting into troubles without me." the girl explained.
"Mie, please, this is not the way to treat a key witness." Tomo's deep voice came from behind her.
"A key witness?" Ayase mumbled.
"Yes…" Mie sighed and scratched the back of her head. "Let's seat down for a while, we need to talk, Aya-chan."
Tomo offered Mie a plastic chair and dragged another one for himself. Ayase tucked himself in his bed and looked at the both of them; they were acting strange, Tomo cleared his throat too many times and Mie was blushing in an uncharacteristic way.
"Mie-chan, please tell me what is going on." Ayase whispered, blushing himself.
"Ok, I guess there's no way around it, Aya-chan, "Mie started after the awkward silence "I'm a cop, a detective actually, and I've been working undercover in the past tow years. I was assigned to you as a part of a police investigation on Kanou Somuku. I used my friendship with you to get into his office and recover documents and data. I'm so sorry I lied to you, Aya-chan, I do like you a lot and I see you as a friend."
Ayase ogled her, mouth wide open; he blinked once and twice, trying to take the news in. He shifted his gaze to Tomo-san.
"It is true." The police officer said. "We were running an investigation on Kanou, we suspected illegal activities and connections to the Yakuza."
"Did you find any… illegal activities?" Ayase asked in trembling voice.
"No, zero, nada." Mie stated with frustration. "The guy is clean, or a master of deception, we cannot even prove his involvement with the Hana group."
"However, we can charge him with human trafficking." Tomo continued, "It is up to you, Ayase-san, if you repeat before us now what you have said to Mie-san when you were both locked at the Yakuza basement."
Ayase gasped, clenching his hands on the hospital sheets.
"Do you remember?" Mie said, softly. "You told me Kanou-san bought you and forced you into a sexual relationship."
"Kanou-san saved my life!" Ayase suddenly screamed. "Kanou-san got me out of hell and gave me life again! You got me all wrong, Mie-san, I'll never do anything to harm him!" he started crying.
Mie looked at Tomo and sighed again. "Ayase-san… I only want to help you, can't you see that?" she finally said.
"If you want to help me, then leave me and Kanou-san alone! You don't understand anything! You lied to me! I thought we were friends!"
"We are friends!" Mie answered, getting all teared up as well. "I worry for you! I don't want you to whore yourself to that man!"
"Kanou-san is a good man, Mie-chan, please trust me on this one."
"Well…" Tomo interrupted them. "If you don't want to testify against Kanou, that is your choice, but we still need your statement regarding what happened at the boatshop, this was the biggest clash between gangs in a decade, we rely on your help."
"Fine," Ayase sighed "But I need more time, so please…"
Mie and Tomo took the hint and got up. "I'm sorry for troubling you. See you soon." Tomo bowed and left the room first.
Mie lingered, she was crying still. "I'm so sorry, Aya-chan, can we still be friends?"
Ayase looked at her and bit his lip "I don't know." He said. "How could I trust you again?"
"I'll always tell you the truth from now on, I swear." she vowed.
A sadistic little smile turned up on Ayase's face "Really? Are you and Tomo truly lovers, or was it just an act too?" He asked, taking joy in her blushing face.
"It's not an act, Ayase-kun, we try to keep it low, though." she whispered, "We are not supposed to…"
"Mingle work with a love affair?"
"I'm kinnda his boss, so… yeah."
"I'll stay out of your love life if you stay out of mine."
Mie looked at him puzzled, when did he become so tough? "It's a deal." she smiled. "See you soon, take care."
"You too."
Next to appear at the door were the Kuba twins. Ayase's heart leaped with joy. "Kuba-sans! You are not dead!"
The twins exchanged confused looks "Should we be?" Misao mumbled.
"I though Aida-san killed you!"
The both very lively twins walked into the room, Homare set on the plastic chair and Misao placed a vase full of flowers on the nightstand, they were so stoic about the situation it got Ayase extremely mad.
"So where have you two been when they captured Kanou-san and nearly tortured him to death?" he yelled at the brothers, face turning red.
"Huh?" Misao lifted an eyebrow.
Homare blushed horribly and bowed "Ayase-san, please don't be angry." the older Kuba brother begged. "I was here at the hospital all the whole time, watching over Isao-san and Sen-kun, Shachou gave me his permission to do so."
"And I, on the other hand, was out all night, fighting both the Hana group and the Snakes." Misao said calmly "I was on my way to help Kanou, but the police beat us to it."
"I see." Ayase lowered his head, losing his nerves again, "I'm sorry."
"You were worried with a good reason." Homare said. "It was a real bloodshed, last night. Twelve dead, eighteen wounded."
"Bau-Yu?" Ayase asked, trembling.
"Lee's kid?" Misao came seating next to his brother "She's fine, with the social service right now, her father was killed, but she is better off without him, if you don't mind me saying."
"Poor child." Ayase sighed. "And… Hayate?"
"Dead." Misao coldly replied.
"Aida?"
"Dead." Misao said again in a flat voice, but Ayase felt his heart clenching.
"How did Aida-san die?" he asked slowly, after all, he did remember Aida leaving that place alive.
"He survived the battle alright, but they found him in his car with a bullet in his head, a suicide, they say, go figure." Misao said.
"He wanted to join his beloved Mizuumi." Ayase whispered.
"Say what?" Homare leaned forwards.
"No matter." Ayase shook his golden hair; he smiled a little, taking a small comfort knowing that Aida had joined his loved ones in the afterlife.
A knock on the door disturbed them and Gion's head popped in. "Are you done yet?" he asked "Visiting hours are nearly over, hurry up now!"
"Let them breath, you ugly buffoon!" a voice came scolding Gion's rudeness, belonging to Someya-san without a doubt.
"You are very popular today, Ayase-san." Homare smiled and turned Misao. "Little bro, we should leave."
"Hai, hai."
oOOo
After visiting hours were over, people left the corridors and the abandoned hospital was awfully quiet. No one remained at the floor except a nurse on duty, watching television at her station. That is why Ayase was surprised when someone opened the door.
"Who is it?"
"Relax, blondie boy, it's only me." came a voice and the silhouette of a small boy formed at the door. His spiky hair and slender form left little room for mistake.
"Sen-kun?"
"That's right." The boy smiled, entering the room while dragging his IV pole with him. "I asked to get transferred to this room tonight, is it ok with you?"
Ayase looked around the room; there were plenty of empty beds around. "I'd be happy to have you here; being here all alone after dark is kinda creepy."
Sen smiled at the invitation. "I've heard you've gotten yourself into troubles, Ayase-kun."
"I can say the same thing about you."
The raven-haired boy smiled and climbed up an empty bed next to Ayase. "Troubles? What are you talking about? I only got kidnapped and rape by the Yakuza, to find out I got Aids the next day."
"HIV, not Aids, there's a difference."
"If you say so, sucks anyway."
"I'm sorry for what happened to you."
"Mah, shit happens." Sen tried to act tough, but Ayase could see through his game. The boy was scared and confused. "I'm sorry I pulled you into my mess too. If you got infected, I don't know what to do…"
"It's ok, I'm healthy, I'm on the cocktail just as a formality."
"I'm glad to hear that." Sen burrowed under his blankets. "You saved my life, dude…thank you."
"You're welcome." Ayase smiled.
Sen stared into the darkness for a good long while before speaking again. "Ayase-kun…" He whispered.
"Huh?" Ayase opened his eyes aging after drifting slowly into sleep.
"Ayase-kun, why did you save me? I'm just a lowlife rent-boy, why did you bother?"
"Why are you talking like that, Sen-kun?"
"I'll be discharged soon and go work the streets again, earning my smokes and my smack, living my shitty little life until this disease gets me. I'm no use to nobody… so why?"
"Everyone is useful, Sen-kun, and you won't die of Aids either, if you take your meds properly."
"I'd rather buy my smack rather then those useless drugs. I cannot afford them anyways."
"Homare-san said he'll lend you the money and he will be very disappointed if you don't go home with him. He really wanted to give you a chance for a new life."
"Homare-san? One of the hot twins, yeah? That dude paid all my bills, must have been a fucking fortune, how could I ever pay him back? Do you think he'll accept sex as payment?"
Ayase blushed into his sheets. "Well, I think Homare-san is only doing things out of his pure generosity."
"No way."
"Yes way, he is a good man, you can trust him."
"Where's the catch?"
"No catch, Sen, he just want to help you."
"You are hallucinating, Ayase-kun, your fever is running too high."
"Give him a chance and you'll see."
"Let me sleep on it." Sen sunk into his pillow. "Good night."
"Good night."
They both closed their eyes and drifted off into a blessed rest. The night passed and the light of dawn entered through the window.
Ayase woke up and set up, hugging his pillow. He looked around and found Sen soundly sleeping still. He was still tiered but his body was restless, and he knew why.
He got out of bet and into his slippers and put his hospital robe on. He left the room, after checking on Sen, who was peacefully slumbering.
He went down the still empty halls and headed to the nurse station to find out were Kanou's room was.
Kanou was placed in the intensive care unit; his bed was surrounded by medical equipment, monitoring his blood pressure, his heart rate, pumping oxygen to his lungs and medicine to his veins.
Ayase sighed at the sight of the man he loved. Kanou was pale; his face swollen almost beyond recognition, and his body was decorated with bruises and stitches.
The blonde boy placed a chaste kiss on Kanou's cheek and brushed his dark hair.
"We must stop meeting at this place." he whispered to Kanou's ear.
"Excuse me, sir, you are not allowed in." Came the nurse and scolded him.
"Oh, Sensei, please let me stay a while longer." Ayase turned his huge blue eyes, pleading.
The nurse was not ready for such amount of curtness she posed hesitating, admiring the beautiful boy in front of her. "Are you his lover?"
"I am." Ayase smiled proudly, not blushing at all.
"Fine." She hummed "But you must get out of here before the morning rounds or I lose my job, ok? You must leave before seven."
"I will." Ayase's smile widened.
The nurse nearly melted away. "Be careful not to hurt him and don't touch anything!"
"I won't."
She nodded and left, leaving him alone with Kanou. Ayase climbed to his bed, being so small; there was plenty of space for him near Kanou. He got under the covers and snuggled on the man's chest. The heartbeat was strong, and Kanou's body gave away warmth as usual, those both were really good signs and it made Ayase tremendously happy.
He kissed Kanou again, this time on his lips. "You must hurry up and get better." he ordered the sleeping man, and contently he closed his eyes again and fell back to sleep.
oOOo
Aida's funeral was held two weeks later. With the order of Kanou, Homare-san used the company's money to arrange a nice ceremony and buy a respectful tombstone.
Many people came, lots of them were Yakuza, they were all talking about the sad story of Aida Osamu, and the tragic way he ended his life.
Ayase felt sorry of him too, he already forgiven him for all that he put him through. The only comforting thought was that that man, in his short and tragic life, had known true love, and that is something not to be taken for granted, in this estranged world.
The rain fell softly on the grave, as Ayase knelt to burn incense and pray.
"I've got something for you, Aida-san." Ayase smiled at from his pocket, he pulled out a little Polaroid picture, the picture of Mizzumi he kept hidden in his draw all the time. He remembered an old saying- 'Better to love and lose than never love at all'.
He kissed the picture and placed it on the cold stone, whispering, "Take care of each other, farewell, Aida-san."
Someone touched his shoulder. "We should get going," said Homare-san. "There are many reporters outside; we must try to avoid them."
"We should try to avoid the Hana group as well.," added Misao "They keep asking me if Kanou-san will agree to become the new Oyabun, it pisses me off."
"Wait just a second." Someya interfered. "Bau-Yu, honey, didn't you want to put the flowers on the tomb?"
"Yes." The little girl said shyly.
"So please do." Someya smiled gently at her.
"Ok." Bau-Yu stepped forward with her bouquet of white lilies.
"Ain't she something?" Someya smiled proudly at Gion.
"You dressed her up too flashy." Gion replied frowning.
"What's wrong with some style?" the Okama pouted.
"Be careful, Someya-san, just because you adopted her, doesn't mean she's your doll."
"Baka-Gion!" Someya slapped him hard. "You will not tell me how to raise my daughter!"
Bau-Yu placed the flowers on the stone and said her goodbyes, she turned to face Someya and tears filled up her eyes.
"Poor thing, come here."
The girl rushed into the Okana's embrace. "I miss daddy.," she cried.
"I'm sure you do." Someya sighed and petted the kid's head.
"Would you like us to go and buy some candy?" Sen offered in an effort to cheer the girl up.
"Only after you both finish homework." Homera-san interfered.
Sen rolled up his eyes. "Why do you force me to go to the fu… school again?"
"I'm not picking up this argument." Homare said harshly, and Sen pouted.
"After I finish homework, can we really go, Someya-sama?" Bau-Yu asked.
"I'm on a diet, sweetie, but you can go ahead."
"I'll come too." Ayase promised.
"Let's go." Homare said, placing his hand on Sen's shoulder.
They all walked slowly to the graveyard's parking lot and stopped in front of their cars.
"I'm heading to the hospital." Misao said. "Kanou wants me to bring him some documents."
"The man should rest." Someya mumbled.
"If I don't get him his files, he'd kill me.," the younger Kuba said.
"If he won't rest, I'll kill him." The Okama huffed.
"Give it up, the man is hopeless." Homare joined in with a sigh.
"Maybe he should consider becoming the next Oyabun, that way he won't have to work so hard, ne?" Gion offered. "What do you say, Aya-chan?"
The blonde boy simply smiled sweetly "If he becomes a Yakuza… I would kill him."
oOOo
The End
OooO
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A/N- Here we are, saying goodbye, (although if you're up for one last lemon, let me know (^_~) I'm happy and sad at the same time.
Just remember people- Spread the love!
This is See1like signing off.
