DISCLAIMER: IF YOU KNOW IT, I DON'T OWN IT!!!!

A/N: I guess I should have said something about when this whole thing starts… sorry. I didn't realize that I hadn't until someone pointed it out to me in a review. This whole thing takes place about five years after the movie, which means it's been at least eight since Bones got his divorce. Izzy and the others were rescued while the fleet was in the Laurentian system. Sorry if I lost anyone because it seemed that Bones was jumping from his bad divorce to going gaga over Izzy…

Warning: There will be a second hand recount of a moment in the torture of Izzy in this scene, and it is rather disturbing. When I was writing it, I actually had to take a break because I had begun to actually physically feel her terror, her fear. So, if you cannot stomach anything, skip over the section where Spock and Izzy are meditating.

Chapter Eight

About two and a half weeks after what Bones had dubbed the 'jumping incident,' a bleary-eyed, Izzy, her hair looking much like a black haystack, stumbled out of her quarters, grabbed a passing ensign, and was lead to the cafeteria. She grabbed some food and found Jim, Bones, Scotty, and Spock sitting at a table, talking over their breakfasts. She slumped down in a chair between Bones and Scotty, looking rather worse for wear, and gaining the attention of the four men.

"You alright?" Bones asked, the jumping incident coming unbidden to his mind. Izzy grunted before digging into her food.

"You look like you haven't eaten in a month," Jim said, fighting to hold back his laughter. Izzy paused to swallow before answering.

"I might as well have not," she said. "Dracorian mumps takes a lot out of you."

Bones and Jim shared a pointed look at this, but let it go. They had agreed, after little discussion, to keep what they'd learned from Rayne a secret. They had another eleven months before they had to deal with it again, and they'd rather let her know what all they knew in private. "So what did I miss?"

"Nothing really," Scotty said. "The most interesting thing that happened while you were ill was the turbolift going out. Nothing I couldn't handle."

"So how are you feeling?" Bones asked.

"Like I said," Izzy said, "Dracorian mumps takes a lot out of you. I don't really remember anything from the past month."

Again, Jim and Bones shared a pointed look. Bones wasn't really sure if he wanted her to have remembered the jumping incident or not, no matter how much Jim joked about it. However, he knew his friend. He'd slip a joke in around Izzy, and then she'd either be pissed at him for not telling her, or she'd be so embarrassed that she'd stay away from him, and, for some reason, he didn't want her to stay away from him. He should. If he knew what was best for him, he'd stay away from the dangerously attractive woman before him. But, he couldn't, even if it killed him.

"That's odd," Spock was saying. "I have never heard of Dracorian mumps causing memory loss."

"Really, it doesn't," Izzy said, taking another bite of her food and swallowing it quickly. "But it causes the person to… escape from themselves. They don't really know what they're doing. Having suffered from it as long as I have, my mind just automatically blocks the memories when I come out of the state, as if it were all just a bad dream."

"That seems illogical," Spock argued. "Why would your mind block an entire month of your life?" Izzy sighed, hastily eating another bite before she answered him.

"I haven't met very many people that suffer from Dracorian mumps, and I know that the effects of the disease vary from case to case, but most of us repress what happens while we are under the influence of the disease," Izzy said, pausing to take another bite. "It's like… we succumb to our subconscious, and we are controlled by our basest instincts, our deepest, secret feelings. There have been people, whose minds didn't suppress the things that they did, that simply went insane from it. So, it's actually quite logical to do away with the memories from that month."

The table was silent for a moment as they took in what Izzy said, and Izzy shoveled more food into her mouth.

"Perhaps," Spock said quietly. "Perhaps I could be of assistance. The Vulcan race has a great many meditative techniques. Perhaps, if I were to teach you a few of them, your Dracorian mumps will not effect you as badly as they do."

Izzy stopped, fork poised at her gaping mouth, and looked at him. Bones and Jim were also looking at him. Izzy remained as she was for a long moment, pondering. While she didn't really have Dracorian mumps, everything she had said was true. When she went into heat, she was stripped of the barrier between her conscious thoughts and her subconscious, and her mind instinctively repressed the memories of that month every year. Perhaps, as Spock had said, the Vulcan meditation would help her, not only bear with those memories, but actually control herself a little better when she did go into heat again. Her decision made, her hand continued on the path it had paused so abruptly on, and she slowly chewed the food before answering him.

"That would be very helpful, Spock," she said. "Thank you."

It was three days later, as the Enterprise stopped into an orbit around a strange, golden planet. Izzy was in the med bay, for what seemed like the umpteenth post-illness check up that Bones had called her in for. They were the only two in the med bay, for some reason, until Jim walked into the room. He glanced at Bones, who nodded ever so slightly at him, and scooted a chair over to her bio bed.

"What's going on?" Izzy asked, sitting up on the bio bed.

"We know what's been going on, Izzy," Bones said, noticing how she visibly stiffened.

"What are you talking about?" she asked. Bones continued with her check up whilst Jim filled her in on the jumping incident, and how it had led them to contact Rayne. By the time he was finished telling her what all they knew, Bones had finished with the check up and pulled a chair over to the other side of her bio bed.

"So you basically went over my head to find out that my file lied about the Dracorian mumps," Izzy said slowly, "and Rayne was more than happy to fill you in on my life?"

"Pretty much," Jim said. "Has Spock's meditation training been helping?"

Izzy thought back, to the previous evening, when she had met Spock in her quarters and 2000 hours, as they had planned.

"Greetings, Spock," she said, holding her hand up. "Thank you again for helping me."

"Greetings, Lieutenant Barrett," Spock said, stepping into her quarters. "And it is very much my pleasure to help any crew member as best I can."

"Please," Izzy said, "if you refuse to call me Izzy, at least call me Isula when we are here. It'll help me listen better."

"Whatever you think will help is fine, Isula," he said. The two of them had gotten situated, sitting indian-style on the floor, facing each other.

"Now, you need to close your eyes," Spock said. Izzy slowly closed her eyes, "and let your mind wander. Let it go where it may, but focus on the memories it brings to bear. Do you have a memory in mind?" Izzy nodded.

"It's… I'm on a ship," she said. If her eyes had been open, they would have been vacant. Her entire being seemed to be focused on that memory. "I'm strapped to a table… where are my clothes? Where are my parents? And my brothers, Simon and Luigi? Oh my God! I remember now. The Klingons, the death, the fire, the phasers trained on me… then floating away. Where am I? There's… there's someone else here. She's strapped to a table, like me… but…" Izzy gasped. "Somebody's been cutting into her head. She's looking at me, staring at me! Something's telling me to run, but I can't go anywhere. I'm fighting against the bonds, but all I get for my struggles is red marks across my stomach, my arms, my legs. God help me, I'm scared." Izzy began to shake, and Spock knew something was wrong. She had gone too far into the memory. He tried to shake her, to bring her out, but, as her eyes opened, they were rolled back into her head. He thought about calling for a doctor, but she began to speak again.

"The door's open… a pair of Klingons have walked into the room. They look like doctors, but their clothes are covered in red splashes… is that blood?" The shaking stopped, but Izzy's face was still gone. "One of them's doing something to the other girl… he's digging in her head, in her brain! The other's looking at me, I think, but I'm paying too much attention to the other girl… I need to remember her face, in case I ever get out of here. She's tall, and dark. She's got black eyebrows, darker than mine, and her huge eyes are brown. The Klingon by me has something shiny in his hand, distracting me. He's… it's something sharp. Why is it coming closer? Why is he, what's he going to do?" Her vocal train of thought was cut off as she screamed. The scream itself was horrible, high-pitched and loud. But it carried something else, something… something full of more pain than any one person should have to bear. And, as quickly as it came, it cut off. Izzy collapsed on the floor, panting, as her eyes focused on the ground before her.

"Are you… are you alright, Isula?" Spock asked, kneeling by her side. "Do you require a doctor?"

"N… no," Izzy said shakily, taking the hand he offered and sitting up. "I… I'll be okay. Just give me a minute."

Spock nodded and stood, walked over to the replicator, and returned to her with a small glass of water, which he handed to her.

"Thank you, Spock," she said, slowly sipping on the water.

"Was that when you were first taken by the Klingons?" he asked, his slanted eyebrows drawn together in concern. Izzy nodded.

"I told you it was logical for the mind to block some memories," she said. "You've just witnessed some of what I relive almost every night. Well, it's not always that scene, of course, but it is always more of the same. Find myself strapped naked to a cold table, usually with another person strapped on another table in the room, Klingons enter, and pain. Lots and lots of pain."

Izzy and Spock had decided to continue these sessions, on the basis of, if he could learn more about what had happened to her, he could help her deal with it more. They had talked for hours, going over that one memory, and she had told him about her heat, because, what if the next memory she relived happened then, when she was in heat? She thought it best to tell him, the only one on the ship that would truly understand what it felt like.

"Izzy?" Jim asked, calling her to the present.

"Huh?" she asked before shaking her head back and forth. "Oh, uh, not quite how we planned, but that's the wonderful thing about plans… they change."

A/N: Wow… I told you it was intense. Anyway, I hope you liked it, or at least survived it and wanted to hear more. :P So, anyways, a couple of things. I know I've asked you to review, and said that constructive criticism is helpful. And it is. Just… don't tell me that Izzy is a poster child for Mary Sues. That's actually part of why this chapter took so long. So, no, I don't mind constructive criticism, but keep it constructive. If you think the story's crap, that's fine. Nobody here is forcing you to read it. I would like to thank those of you that reviewed, but please, folks, let's keep them helpful. Love you all.

Live long and prosper.