Vespertine

Chapter Nine: The Blurred Line


Now that I've found you

And seen behind those eyes

How can I carry on?

For so bare is my heart, I can't hide


Dawn was breaking.

Sasuke raised his head and looked to the window, noting the shift in light through the closed blinds with the dull, weary gaze of chronic fatigue. He ran his hands over his face, felt the faint scratch of stubble against his palms. Another nearly sleepless night.

Next time, he should at least pretend. Lying awake in a bed would be far better for his back than sitting hunched in a chair all night. Besides, if the others knew, they would fuss over him and that was the last thing he needed. He was going to kill himself if he kept this up, they would tell him, and they would only worry more if he told them that he really didn't care.

Only one thing mattered anymore.

He thought of his brother, whose corpse was rotting away in Madara's northern compound. He hadn't been able to look at the body, unable to physically confront the despairing enormity of that reality. His thoughts and feelings toward Itachi were more conflicted now than they had ever been: torn between love and hate, idolization and disappointment. So much more and so much less.

He wished he'd never learned the truth. If he'd only been able to hate him until the end, if he'd been able to feel justified in taking his brother's life…he might have been able to move on.

There was a soft knock at the door, and he straightened into a more composed posture. "What."

"Sasuke-kun?" The door clicked open and Karin poked her head in, peered around the darkened room until she found him, and then tentatively came inside. "We'll be ready to move out just after sunrise," she informed him.

Today they would begin the final journey to Konoha, where he would put an end to the villainy that had destroyed his family. There was no coming back from this mission. He knew that. He didn't care, as long as those corrupt elders went down with him. His only regret was that the three he'd come to call comrades probably wouldn't make it out either, but they refused to let him go alone. Sasuke breathed deep, and nodded.

"How long will it take to get there?"

They were at the western end of Earth country, in another of Madara's hideouts. Travel would be slow to avoid drawing unwanted attention. "A few weeks, probably," he answered.

Karin lingered, crossing her arms over her chest self-consciously. "…Are you alright?" she asked tentatively.

He doubted he would ever be alright again. "I'm fine," he grunted.

"Are you sure?"

Sasuke shot her a glare, looking her way for the first time. Usually it was enough to get her—any of them—to back off, but now she only stared right back at him. The light through the doorway cast a halo around her bright crimson hair.

Karin struggled with herself for a moment, but then finally took a deep breath and said, "Sasuke-kun, I think we should talk."

If Sasuke hadn't long since perfected his poker face, he would have cringed. He didn't respond.

She pressed on. "About…that."

"What's there to talk about?" he said as coolly as possible.

"Um, a lot, actually." She waited. He remained silent. "Are you going to pretend it didn't happen?"

If only he could. He was surprised she'd waited this long to bring it up. It had been a mistake, for many reasons. In the wake of the ordeal with Itachi he had been unstable, teetering back and forth between grief and rage…and then he'd almost died fighting the eight-tails. They all had. It had been an affirmation of life, nothing more. It happened all the time between shinobi. It was nothing.

So why did he still think about it?

He sighed irritably and dragged his fingers through his unkempt hair. "Not now, Karin."

She huffed indignantly. "Then when? Never, right?"

Her words were bitter—hurt and angry at the same time. Sasuke glared at her again; his reflexive wall of defense. He couldn't deal with this now.

Karin wasn't known for her tact or gentility, and after a long moment of tense silence, she finally lost her temper. "You need to pull your head out of your ass, Uchiha Sasuke! Stop fixating on the past or future or whatever and take a look at what's right in front of you!" She spun abruptly and went to leave.

She did this all the time: told him off "for his own good" and then got all huffy when he ignored her. She always got over it eventually. But Sasuke knew it was different this time. He suddenly felt like he had damaged something. He didn't want her to be angry with him over this.

"Karin."

She stopped in the doorway and turned, wary yet tentatively hopeful.

"Later, okay?" His voice came out softer and wearier than he meant it to.

Karin stared at him as if she didn't quite believe him, but finally gave a thin smile and nodded. Then she left. A few moments later, he heard banging on a door down the hall as she shouted at Suigetsu to get out of the bathroom. It was followed by the Mist nin's muffled voice replying with a string of profanities.

Sasuke sighed.

He'd lied to her. But then, he was lying to everyone. He was becoming as good a liar as his brother had been.

She'd said he thought too much of the past and future and not enough of the present. But that was the problem. The past was what drove him, and there was no future. In the end, it didn't matter what Karin felt or wanted, or whether he felt or wanted anything in return. It didn't matter if they never talked about it. He was on a one-way road to hell, and anyone he cared about would only be dragged down with him. It was why he'd left his first team—his first friends. His quest for revenge had taken everything, and when it was over there would be nothing left but the hollow emptiness he already felt creeping up on him. If he made her hate him, he would be doing her a favor.

Something disturbed the deeper shadows of the room, and the back of his neck prickled uncomfortably. His eyes bled red as he glared into the darkness.

The darkness spoke. "What a touching moment that was. She's quite…spirited, isn't she? You're a brave man, Sasuke-kun."

"Fuck off."

Uchiha Madara chuckled and emerged from where he'd been lurking, tall and cloaked and utterly sinister. "Now, now. Don't bite the hand that feeds."

Sasuke had no idea how long he'd been there listening and watching, and it unnerved him. "How did you know where I was?"

"I have ways."

"What do you want?" he snapped.

"You and your band of misfits broke your promise to me," he said darkly. "You were supposed to deliver the eight-tails."

"We did."

"No…it was a fake. You failed."

Sasuke frowned in surprise. "How is that possible?"

"You tell me. It would seem your Sharingan is below par to miss a detail like that."

In his mind he replayed the events of that fight, trying to figure out how his opponent had tricked him. Outwardly he was uninterested, and looked away dismissively. "We did what you wanted. It's not our problem anymore."

"It's your problem as long as I say it's your problem."

Sasuke's head snapped around to glare at the dark figure. "I'm not working for you or Akatsuki anymore."

A silent moment passed as Madara studied him like a vulture studying its next meal. "Oh yes. I'm afraid you are. You're going to finish the job you started."

They stared at each other in the darkness. Sasuke hated this man almost as much as he hated the ones responsible for his clan's massacre. He knew he was being used to do what Madara was too weak to do himself. A shadow of his former self, Itachi had said. Sasuke had gone along until now because it was convenient, but he had already vowed to kill him as well, if he had a chance.

"No," he said flatly. "Taka has other plans."

"You mean Konoha," Madara said wryly. "Don't bother. By the time you get there I doubt there will be much left."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm sending Pein to collect the jinchuuriki."

"Pein…?"

"The top member of Akatsuki, next to myself. He's not known for his diplomacy."

The news disturbed him, but he didn't dwell on it. "It doesn't matter. I have my own purpose in going to Konoha."

Madara huffed faintly in wry amusement. "I'm sure you do. But as I said, you're going to finish your job for me first."

Anger flared up inside him. "Or what?"

"Or I'll kill you."

In the next instant Sasuke flew across the room, lightning fast, the Chidori flaring to life on his fist as he drove it into Madara's chest.

It passed right through him. So did Sasuke.

Sasuke had to check himself hard to prevent his momentum from crashing him through the wall. The Chidori died out and he spun around to face Madara, heart pounding in alarm. It was the same as before…it just went right through, like an illusion or mirage. But Madara was definitely standing there before him; the Sharingan could discern the faint haze of his chakra.

"You know, you have a far more unpleasant nature than your brother. Perhaps it was you I should have used all along. Itachi was always too…good, for what I made him do."

Sasuke knew he was being goaded, and said nothing. His fists clenched in barely restrained rage.

Whether it was the noise or the flare of the Chidori or Karin sensing Madara's presence, a moment later his teammates burst into the room, weapons ready.

"What's going on, Sasuke?" Karin asked uneasily.

"Nothing," he replied curtly, still staring at the masked figure.

"This sure don't look like 'nothing,'" remarked Suigetsu.

"Just checking in," Madara said in a casual, mocking tone, "to let you know your work for me isn't finished."

"The hell it ain't!" the Mist nin snorted, shifting his hulking, stolen sword on his shoulder. "We did what you wanted."

"I'm not fond of repeating myself," Madara said, sounding bored. "I'll let you fill them in. See you soon, Sasuke-kun." He vanished.

The three other members of Taka stared at him, bewildered and concerned.

"What the hell was that?" Suigetsu demanded.

"The eight-tails escaped and he wants us to track him down again," Sasuke said, still trying to calm himself. "But it doesn't matter. Our plans aren't changing."

"Is it wise to make an enemy of him?" said Juugo.

Sasuke thought of what Madara had done to his brother. "He was already an enemy, from the moment he made his existence known to me." He suddenly felt unbelievably exhausted. "I need to get ready," he informed his lingering teammates, his tone flat to cover any unwanted slip of emotion. "We're leaving in an hour."

They shuffled out reluctantly. Karin was the last to leave, regarding him worriedly for a moment before quietly closing the door.

Alone again in the darkness, Sasuke sat at the foot of the bed and put his aching head in his hands.


The most wonderful aroma permeated Sakura's nose, stirring her from sleep. In the muddled, half-conscious moment that followed, she first became aware that she was alone in the bed. Then her senses cleared and she identified the smell which was teasing her and her appetite awake: grilled fish. With a soft sigh, she rolled over and opened her eyes.

Itachi was standing at the stove, his back to her. It took her a moment to register what she was seeing, and her eyes opened fully and she sat up as she realized he was making breakfast.

Sakura smiled.

Climbing quietly out of bed, she padded barefoot over to him. He didn't turn to her, but she knew he'd probably been aware the moment she'd woken. "You cook?" she asked, pleasantly surprised.

"Doesn't everyone?" he asked mildly, glancing at her sideways. The fringes of dark hair falling loose from his ponytail obscured his expression.

"Well, no, actually." Naruto, for example, couldn't manage to do more than boil water for ramen without wreaking havoc on food or kitchen.

He turned more fully this time, giving her a slightly bemused look. "How do you think I survived your absence, Sakura?"

"I suppose you could have eaten cold from the can," she returned playfully. Leaning against the counter, her gaze fell on the meal he'd prepared for them: a traditional breakfast of rice, miso, egg, and grilled fish. He'd even made tea. It all looked and smelled delicious. Her stomach gurgled eagerly.

Sakura had been making the effort to return to town once a week so they could have fresh food rather than canned and dehydrated meals all the time. Personal preferences aside, Itachi needed to eat as wholesomely as possible during his recovery. She'd been surprised to see fish in the market, but then remembered Itachi mentioning the western coast of Lightning was just over the mountains, two days away. It wasn't the freshest she'd ever had, but it was better than prepackaged food. She planned to make another trip tomorrow.

She knew why Itachi was up early; last night she'd told him he could start training today. She had fully expected to wake up and find that he'd been up for hours, already outside pushing himself to his limits. The last thing she expected was this. She looked up at him. "You didn't have to do this."

Itachi turned off the stove began placing their food onto plates. "…I wanted to."

Sakura thought him impossibly adorable at that moment. "Well…thanks." She moved inside his reach as he held a dish in each hand and rose on tiptoe to press a soft kiss to his cheek. The faintest of smiles curved his lips as he followed her to set the table.

When they sat down to eat, she took one bite of the fish and her eyes nearly rolled back in her head. It was prepared to perfection. "Mmmgh," she exclaimed through a mouthful. "This is really good." Half-jokingly she added, "I think you should make all our meals from now on."

Itachi was rather pleased by her uninhibited reaction, and smirked. "I think that's only fair. Until now you have been doing everything yourself. It hasn't felt right."

In those first days, he hadn't been capable of much more than walking himself to the bathroom, and she wouldn't have let him do more if he'd tried, anyway. But she didn't say that, knowing any mention of his weakened state would only bother him. Instead, she gave him a playful grin. "You can be in charge of the fire as well then, since you're the resident katon master."

"We should share that duty," he returned smoothly. "I can't demolish trees as fast as you can."

Sakura laughed and took a few more bites of her delicious breakfast. Nothing she ever made tasted this good, and she wondered how he had suffered through her mediocre culinary attempts for the last month. "You know, it's really not fair," she protested, "that you're so good at everything…"

He was vaguely amused by that. "No one is good at everything."

"Really," she deadpanned. "What aren't you good at?"

"That should be fairly obvious to you by now."

Sakura studied him a moment. People. He wasn't good at dealing with people. He was so introverted that he would seem shy if he didn't have such a calm, composed presence. That combination of confidence and reticence made him seem arrogant at first, but she had soon discovered he was far from it. She'd read somewhere that it was a common stigma of genius; they were on such a different mental level than most people that they just didn't know how to interact socially. It frustrated her at times, but she had learned to see beyond it and didn't expect or demand long, heart to heart conversations with him. Besides, his silences often spoke volumes. And his actions were most definitely loud and clear…

Sakura blinked and stopped that train of thought before it ran away with her. She gave him a knowing smile. "No, I don't suppose you'll be giving any motivational speeches anytime soon, huh?"

They finished breakfast, and afterward cleaned up together. Then Itachi went outside to begin physical training. After writing some notes on his progress in her medical journal, Sakura bundled up as well and went out to check the perimeter.

As she stepped outside, her cheeks tingled as her lungs expanded in the cold, crisp air. Sakura loved the snow. Growing up in a temperate country, it was an exciting novelty to her. The weather had turned a few days ago and the forest around their little cabin was now pristine and white. Itachi's footprints leading around back were the only disturbance to the fresh blanket.

Several weeks ago, after finding Itachi in the clinic, she recalled thinking how strangely surreal that first encounter and the days following had been. Sakura knew Itachi felt the same; 'Here in this place…it sometimes feels like a different life.' Their prolonged seclusion together had only furthered the feeling that they had somehow stepped outside of time and space into a world that belonged only to them. Especially in moments like now, when they were the only people for miles and the world was silent and still.

Stepping off the porch, she treaded carefully through Itachi's larger tracks as far as she could before diverging, not wanting to further disturb the picturesque serenity of the clearing. Once in the forest she took to the frost-covered trees. Over the past month, the periodic security maintenance had become her think time, when she wasn't preoccupied with Itachi's needs or her own. Now was no different, and soon her mind wandered.

In the two weeks since her return from Konoha they had fallen back into the same comfortable routine of healing sessions, shared meals, and stimulating conversation. They had played shogi a few times, but while Sakura was able to challenge him—a fact which Itachi admired and appreciated—she had quickly learned she really didn't stand a chance at winning against a tactical mastermind. They had switched to playing various card games to alleviate their intermittent boredom instead. The only thing different about their days was Itachi's occasional restlessness as he regained strength and his body yearned for physical activity. And of course, there was the new intimacy between them.

Sakura smiled to herself, a fluttery sensation filling her as it always did whenever she thought about those moments with him. Little moments, mostly. She was usually the initiator; she would reach for his hand, or her fingertips would linger in a caress during their healing sessions. Sometimes Itachi would touch her face, her hair. Sometimes he would kiss her, and it was those moments she longed for most; when he would lower his careful guard and show the depth of his attraction to her.

He was holding back, struggling with himself for several reasons, some of which she knew, and some she didn't understand. After so many years living in a constant state of danger and paranoia, it was difficult for him to let his guard down with another person, both physically and emotionally. Sakura was a very affectionate person, but didn't want to push him. He had already made a lot of progress with letting her get close. The uncomfortable cot had been put away for some time, and she now crawled into the bed beside him every night. She made an effort not to invade his space too much as they fell asleep, but every morning she would inevitably be curled against him. Itachi didn't seem to mind, for she often woke to find his arm around her, and a few times his face was pressed against her hair, his breaths tickling the back of her neck. On those mornings she had feigned sleep and stayed in bed as long as possible.

But sometimes, it almost felt as if there was a sadness to his affection, a hint of melancholy, as if he believed that he wasn't supposed to have what was between them, or that it wouldn't last. That was what Sakura didn't understand. Of course they both knew that he wouldn't be able to return to Konoha for a while yet, but it wasn't forever. There was no reason to think they couldn't be together. It was almost as if he knew something she didn't….

Sakura stopped suddenly as a nagging little fear wormed its way into the back of her mind. Maybe…maybe Itachi didn't want to return to Konoha. Maybe he had no intention of devoting the rest of his new life to the village that ruined his old one. No one could blame him for that. And no one could expect him to change his mind on such a serious matter for the sake of a girl.

Troubled and distracted, Sakura rushed through the remainder of her perimeter check and headed back to the cabin. She spent the next few hours going over the notes in her journal and writing new ones, mostly to take her mind off other things. Around midday, she became hungry and restless, and went outside to check on Itachi.

He was going through a series of advanced kata. She leaned against the cabin and watched him silently for several minutes. His movements were fluid and beautiful, like a dance. Perfect, even after months of neglect. He may still be lacking in strength and stamina, but his agility and precision were flawless.

When he finished the set he turned to her. She smiled at him, partially forgetting the troubling thoughts from before. "I was about to make lunch. Are you hungry?"

Itachi shook his head. He was flushed and perspiring, but his breathing was only slightly labored. "I want to get through several more exercises before the temperature begins to drop."

"Oh. Okay. Well, don't push yourself too hard."

Itachi started another set without answering. Feeling slightly disappointed, Sakura went back inside and made lunch for herself. Afterward she lounged on the bed to read, and eventually fell asleep.

When she woke it was nearly full dark outside. She sat up and looked around. The lights were on, the fire burned steadily, and after a moment her ears picked up the sound of the shower running. She sat there, half zoning out and half thinking of the proposal she planned to make to Itachi, until the water stopped and he eventually emerged.

She didn't expect him to come out shirtless. From the look he gave her—albeit a mild, subtle one—he hadn't expected to find her awake. Her eyes automatically traveled over his torso, noting the changes. As usually happens when someone very ill or malnourished goes into recovery, he was gaining weight remarkably fast. He'd regained several pounds already, and would surely put on several more once he began to rebuild muscle mass. In a few more weeks, she figured, he would be back to his old self. His pants were still loose though, and hung low on his hips. Her eyes lingered appreciatively on his lower abdomen and hipbones for a moment before she caught herself. If Itachi had noticed—which she was sure he had—he didn't acknowledge it. "How was your workout?" she asked him.

"Frustrating," he muttered, frowning a little. "There is a long way to go."

"You'll get there soon. You've made amazing progress already."

"It's you who has made all the progress. Without your skills I would be dead now," he said pointedly.

"There's more to recovery than the healer; it's a two-way street. The patient has to want to get better." She smiled, and playfully conceded, "So we're both amazing, then."

Itachi just gave her an amused look and retrieved a shirt from the small chest of drawers that contained both their clothes. As he slipped his arms through and raised it over his head, Sakura noticed a very slight hesitation in the motion, as well as a wince just before his face disappeared under the fabric.

"What's wrong?" she asked, already suspecting.

"…Nothing. Just soreness." He finished pulling the shirt on with a carefully controlled expression.

She gave him a look. "I seriously doubt a little muscle stiffness would make Uchiha Itachi flinch," she said flatly. "You hurt yourself, didn't you? Get over here."

With only a mild glower, Itachi did as ordered. Sakura pulled him down to sit on the bed with her. "Take the shirt off again. It will make this easier."

Itachi doubted that, considering the effect her chakra-covered hands had against his bare skin the last time, but again he complied without argument, grimacing a little as he lifted his arms over his head.

Sakura massaged his shoulder, at first gently, then more intensively. Her hands began to glow and she sent small pulses of chakra under his skin, searching for inflammation or tearing. Itachi remained silent, and more relaxed than she'd expected. When she found the problem she clicked her tongue in reproach. "You've strained a tendon. You're lucky you didn't tear it completely. Your tendons and ligaments don't have the same musculature protecting them as before; they will strain and tear more easily. You can't push yourself this hard so quickly."

"There is no time to take things slowly."

"And if I have to keep repairing the damage you cause yourself it will take three times as long," she argued exasperatedly. "And while I can heal it, it doesn't make you good as new. The more you injure yourself, the more prone to injury you will be in the future."

"I know this," he said, frowning slightly. If Sakura didn't know better, she might think he was pouting.

"Then take it easy, okay?" she urged quietly, running her hands over his shoulders soothingly. The sight and feel of his bare skin still did funny things to her, and she fought the urge to wrap her arms around him and press her face to the smooth plane between his shoulder blades. She shifted around to his side to remove the temptation, but it didn't really help. The strain was healed but she continued the massage, ostensibly to prevent his muscles from tensing, but mostly because she wanted to keep touching him.

Itachi felt the shift in her mood and intent. The pressure and rhythm of her hands had changed: less clinical, more of a caress. Her fingertips lingered against his skin, causing sensations that had little to do with her chakra. She was very close; he could feel her warmth, smell the subtle, feminine fragrance of her hair and skin. It called to him, beckoning him to close that distance, and without really thinking about it, he reached for her. His hand found her knee and moved upward, around, until he had leverage on the back of her thigh to pull her in.

Sakura's breath caught as he moved her, and she set both hands on his shoulders as she was pulled half across his lap. His other hand found her hip to steady her. Their faces were close, and their breaths mingled for a long, heart-catching moment before she closed the remaining distance to meet his lips.

It was a different kind of kiss than they usually shared; sensual and lustful, driven by raw attraction, and within moments Sakura was straddling his lap, hands sliding over his shoulders to link behind his neck. In the last two weeks they had perfected this together, and Itachi knew exactly what to do with his lips and tongue to make her turn to jelly. His hands too. Sometimes just his slightest touch would send a fluttery, electric jolt through her. They glided over the small of her back, slipped under the hem of her shirt. Sakura made a soft sound of shy pleasure as his roughened palms brushed the sensitive skin of her sides. It almost tickled, but felt too amazing to flinch away.

She responded to his bold caresses with her own, running her hands over his shoulder blades, nails pressing into his skin. Itachi growled low, or maybe purred was a better word, but hearing that deep sound of approval and knowing she caused it drove her further. Unconsciously, she shifted in his lap, pressing her breasts against his bare chest, her hips rolling forward against his. The effect was something she'd never felt before: a white-hot stab of pleasure that seemed to liquefy her insides. She didn't know if it had caused a similar reaction in Itachi, but suddenly he was holding her tighter and trailing heated kisses down her throat. Her head fell back as her body was assaulted by the most amazing shivers brought on by his mouth against her neck. Her body wanted that intense sensation again, and she gave in to its demand by rolling her hips once more.

That was when Itachi stilled, his hands tightening on her sides to hold her still as well. His face remained pressed against the curve of her neck, his eyes closed, breathing slowed and purposefully controlled. A long moment of silence passed, filled with the weight of what didn't happen.

Sakura let her head fall to his shoulder, squeezed her eyes shut in disappointed frustration and willed her racing pulse to slow. Itachi always stopped when things got a little intense, and sometimes she really wished he wouldn't. She understood the nature of this feeling and what her body craved, and knew she wanted to do these things with him. Knew he wanted to as well, but the man had the self-control of a monk. Trying to get him to talk about it would probably go nowhere, and again, she didn't want to push him.

His arms relaxed around her, almost falling away, and he lifted his head very slowly and brushed his lips over her temple. Unspoken understanding passed between them. Sakura sighed softly and carefully moved off him.

She remained close, and softly trailed her fingertips down the length of his arm. As they reached his elbow where the scars from his battle with Sasuke began and continued down his forearm, she spontaneously decided to heal them. There were several poorly healed shuriken cuts, but the majority of scarring was due to burns, more like singes really, where his brother had caught him for a second in one of their notorious fire jutsus. Chakra flared to life in her hands.

Itachi watched her actions for a minute, quietly bemused. "That's unnecessary and superficial," he remarked finally, though his tone was far from protesting.

A faint blush colored her cheeks. It was a shame for his near-perfect beauty to be marred, but that wasn't her primary motive. "Badly healed scars can prevent proper movement, as well as cause continued pain," she justified.

Itachi didn't argue with that, and a comfortable silence enveloped them for a while. Their silences were always comfortable now, a pleasant familiarity so differentfrom how it had been in the beginning. They didn't really need to talk to understand each other.

When she had nearly finished, Sakura spoke again. "I've been doing some research. Well, as much as I can in this place…and I think I might be able to do something for your eyes."

His expression was unreadable. "I wasn't aware that you knew about that."

"Kakashi has vision problems in his Sharingan eye," she explained. "Did you know he has a Mangekyo, too?" He blinked slowly and shook his head once. She wondered why he seemed so surprised. "Also, I've noticed little things, like you squint just a little when looking far away, and reading makes you tired. How bad is it?"

"My vision is darkening," he said. "Sometimes after prolonged use, I have intense, often debilitating headaches. It is the heavy price for all who obtain the Mangekyo. Right now, the world appears as though it's in a state of constant twilight. Light enough to see, but it has lost much of its vibrancy."

"Well maybe I can fix that. Will you let me try?" Itachi nodded, and she smiled softly. "How about we start after dinner? You have to be hungry by now."

"Would you like me to make it?"

The revelation of their delicious breakfast that morning made her want to say 'yes,' but she shook her head. "I'll make it. You should rest your arm."

Over the early dinner they talked more about his physical rehabilitation. Itachi didn't like limitations on things he'd been able to do since childhood, but he understood her reasoning, and the minor injury today helped to drive her point home. He promised to be more cautious when planning training exercises, and Sakura offered to start training with him once he was ready for a more intense routine. She needed it, for the weeks of inactivity were taking their toll on her as well.

Afterward Sakura had Itachi sit back on the bed, and she sat close at his side with her medical journal open before her. Itachi studied the scrawled, mostly shorthand notes—which were sideways from his perspective.

"You're sure about this?"

She thought she detected a note of anxiety in his tone. She was about to attempt an untested procedure on his eyes – his Sharingan eyes. He had a right to be concerned about her messing with the most valuable thing he possessed. But after ridding his body of the disease that had plagued him for the past six years and repairing the extensive damage it had caused, Sakura had a feeling that healing his eyes would be the easy part.

"I wouldn't offer if I wasn't confident I can help in some way," she said. "The headaches you mentioned are almost certainly caused by residual chakra buildup behind the optic nerve, which may also be part of what impairs your vision. That's easy to fix. After that—" She paused and chewed her lip a moment. "Well, I admit this is entirely experimental, but I promise I won't try anything that might do you harm."

"I trust you," he said quietly.

The look in his dark eyes said he meant so much more than the current context, and Sakura was filled with such a warm, profound rush of feeling that she leaned forward and kissed him. He held her there, long fingers resting against her neck, his thumb brushing softly over her cheekbone. The moment stretched so long and sweetly that she almost forgot what she was supposed to be doing.

When she eventually broke away, she gave him her brightest smile. "Are you ready?"

Sakura went very slowly, keeping her eyes closed as her fingertips rested at the corners of his eyes, focusing on every minute detail. The eye being one of the most delicate and complex organs in the body, she had to be completely thorough and extremely careful. It turned out she'd been right about the chakra buildup, and first set to breaking down the thin layers of invisible residue collected behind the optical disk. Itachi sighed softly and relaxed more while she did so, as though it had already brought some relief.

After nearly an hour of probing and studying, Sakura opened her eyes. "I've figured it out," she said with quiet excitement. Itachi opened his eyes almost drowsily and focused on her. "I can do it."

He made no reply, but she could tell he was pleased. After a while she asked him to activate the Sharingan, noting how if internally affected his eyes. There wasn't much change in that form, so she asked him to activate the Mangekyo, and then switch back and forth between the two. She watched his eyes change, fascinated by the way the red and black bled together into different patterns, inwardly marveling at the deep, faceted beauty of the crimson doujutsu. It was one of the most dangerous and deadly things a shinobi could ever encounter, but Sakura wasn't afraid. Itachi wouldn't hurt her. As she'd expected, that second form elicited a noticeable difference in chakra pressure, as well as minute cellular deterioration with each activation.

"I can reverse the damage that's already occurred," she told him, "and I can stop the continual deterioration. But…every time you use the Mangekyo it will damage your eyes. There's nothing that can be done about that. All I can tell you is to use it sparingly—very sparingly."

"Would you be able to heal the damage afterward?"

"Well, yeah, of course. Um. If I'm around," she said, blushing a little. She had sort of just created a way for them to spend frequent time together for the foreseeable future. Not that she thought she needed to have an excuse to spend time with him…but. Well. There was just no way of knowing what was going to happen in the months ahead.

Itachi gave her a knowing, almost roguish smirk. "I believe I can live with those conditions. If you can."

Sakura couldn't fight her smile. "Works for me."

It was the closest they'd ever come to discussing the nature of their relationship and whether it would continue once they left this little cabin and the otherworldly wilderness. Feeling happy and deeply optimistic, Sakura resumed her task. Nearly another hour passed. Itachi seemed asleep by all outward appearances, but she knew better, and wasn't startled when he suddenly spoke.

"What is your rank?" he asked, voice heavy with deep relaxation. The question was seemingly out of nowhere, but he'd been thinking of how skilled and focused she was for her relatively young age.

"I'm a chuunin," she answered. "But the jounin exams are next summer, and I'm going to enter."

"Are you strong enough to pass?"

"I think so." Not really liking her answer, her features set resolutely and she nodded to herself. "Yes," she amended more firmly, meeting his eyes. "I am." Itachi just gave her a long, appraising look. "What?"

A mixture of amusement and respect flickered in his dark eyes. "I believe you are." He watched her another minute before asking, "Why did you become a kunoichi?"

She was a little surprised by all the questions. He wasn't usually so conversational. "I live in a hidden village. It's what people do," she quipped.

"If you belong to a shinobi clan, yes. But you are from a civilian family."

"Well…some of the Yamanaka clan live next door to me; their daughter Ino and I were always sort of rivals. And also…I wanted to do something important. I wanted to be something special, you know? I wanted to impress people. Besides, I was never very good at being girly, and I figured fighting and throwing knives at things would be a good fit. Of course my mother was less than thrilled with my career choice."

"And you've never regretted it? Never wish you had chosen a different life?"

"No. Not for one second." She studied him, wondering where these questions were coming from. "Why did you become a shinobi?"

His expression clouded over, and it was a long moment before he answered. "…I am an Uchiha. It's what we do," he said finally, playing on her words, though there was no humor in it. "It was expected of me as heir. It's what I was born to be."

It wasn't spoken with the conviction and pride most people attached to that phrase. From him, it sounded like a great, wearying burden. "But you didn't…want to be?" she ventured softly. "What did you want?"

"…I don't know," he answered. "I've never allowed myself to think about it. There is no point in dwelling on what could have been."

"Maybe not," she admitted, saddened for him again. "But it's never too late to change the direction of your life, do something that makes you happy."

Itachi never replied to that. He fell quiet, deep in thought or memory, his gaze far away.

"It's almost finished. Keep your eyes closed," she instructed a while later. Her brow knit in concentration as she began the most difficult part: repairing the years of existing deterioration. Itachi's breathing was deep and even, and she tried to match it, to slip into that deep state of concentration and relaxation that helped him through moments of intense stress and anxiety. Painstakingly slow, her chakra wove like invisible threads through the microscopic pathways of his eyes. Clearing, smoothing, reconnecting. Tiny beads of sweat broke out on her brow. One small mistake and she could blind him permanently.

When it was over, she gave a small, triumphant sigh and opened her eyes. "Okay. How is everything?"

From the moment Itachi opened his eyes, the world was different. Like a light had been turned on in a darkened room. He sat up slowly and looked around in a state of muted shock. Almost, but not quite, smiling.

His eyes darted everywhere, taking in details about their living space that he'd never noticed before: the faded and threadbare quilt beneath him, the wood grain pattern of the slightly dusty floor, the rough, pocked surface of the stone walls.

For ten years his eyes had been gradually worsening, so slowly that he hadn't noticed the change until one day he couldn't clearly read a sign across the street. He'd been almost as stunned then as he was now, to realize he was going blind, that his best weapon would grow dull and useless and there was nothing he could do about it. He had accepted it, eventually, gotten used to it and learned to work around it, using his Sharingan more often to compensate. It helped, even if it accelerated the darkness. It had been an acceptable compromise, as he had always known he wouldn't live long enough to go fully blind. But while his world became incrementally darker with every passing year, he had never truly realized the full extent of his loss until now, when everything was suddenly bright and startlingly clear.

Itachi hadn't seen the world so clearly since he was a child. Since before duty forced him to obtain the Mangekyo, and his eyes and his life began the descent into shadow.

He looked to Sakura. For the first time he truly saw how beautiful her eyes were, like glittering beryls. It wasn't just the crystalline color that captivated him, it was the soft intensity of her sharp intellect behind them and the way they always seemed to see right through him, all the way down to the part of himself that even he could no longer see.

And her hair…it had always fascinated him, but now…those multifaceted strands of coral and blossom pink, the roots darkening to a more natural red, the way the firelight enhanced the colors and made it seem as if a glowing, sunset halo framed her exotically lovely face…. He wanted very much just then to reach out and weave his hands into those bright silken locks.

"Incredible," he said quietly.

For some reason, the way he said that one word caused a furious blush to color her cheeks. "I'm just glad I was able to help," Sakura replied. Itachi just continued to stare at her as if he was learning her face all over again. She felt a little flustered under his rapt attention. "You must be pretty tired after all that. Not to mention your overzealous workout. I still need to write down how the procedure worked. I'll let you get some sleep..."

Itachi shifted closer, leaned in until their faces were only inches apart. He trailed his fingertips down her face until they held her chin. "Stay," he murmured softly, and then captured her lips with his.

Sakura didn't argue, letting him pull her down on top of him. Who cared about medical notes when they could be doing this? She felt high, giddy with affection, both given and received. This must be what people called cloud nine. Itachi continued to kiss her softly and lingeringly, like he was thanking her. His fingers found their way into her hair and stayed there, even after their kiss ended and she reached down to pull the blankets over them both, snuggling against his chest with a contented sigh. After all the healings she was pretty tired, and was asleep within minutes.

Itachi remained awake, unable to sleep when everything was like new. If Sakura hadn't worn herself out healing him, he would have been tempted to keep her awake just to watch the way her lips moved when she talked and smiled, the way her eyes glittered in the light of the fire. Instead he contented himself with watching her sleep, how the delicate fan of her lashes moved as she dreamed, the rise and fall of her breathing and the soft palpitations of her pulse against her throat. He splayed the ends of her hair between his fingers and studied how the light caught them. He noticed for the first time the faint dappling of freckles across her cheeks.

She was so very beautiful to him.

The dark years of his life were now truly, literally over, it seemed. Mostly because of one fiercely determined and compassionate kunoichi. He had never known anyone like her. He owed her more than he could ever possibly repay.

'It's never too late to change the direction of your life, do something that makes you happy,' she'd told him earlier. Itachi still wasn't convinced such a thing was even possible, and if it were, he had no idea where to begin. What did he want for himself? What would make him happy?

Eventually his eyes grew heavy and he glanced to the window, mildly surprised to see the sky growing lighter with the coming dawn. He'd been thinking for nearly the entire night and still had no clear answer. Sakura was still curled against him, sound asleep, secure and trusting in a way he'd been incapable of understanding until very recently. Fingers still tangled in her hair, he slipped his other arm around her and turned on his side. She turned with him unconsciously, and he pulled her back against his chest, his face pressed close to the nape of her neck as he finally drifted to sleep.


Sakura made the trip into Moyama the next morning as planned. The fifteen mile run each way was the only exercise she was getting lately, and she'd come to look forward to it. The only downside was that in order to make the morning market, she had to get up ridiculously early. She'd left Itachi sleeping—or pretending to, as she doubted she could even roll over without waking him. Maybe he would make breakfast again when she got back.

The village was quiet and sleepy under the blanket of winter. Smoke piped thickly from nearly every chimney, and only those few residents with specific business were wandering through the frozen streets. She had a feeling the market would be sparse this morning.

It turned out she was right. She did what she could, buying some sausages and hardy squash, as well as a loaf of delicious looking cinnamon-raisin bread. There was always fresh bread at least, no matter what time of year. After making her purchases she headed over to the general store. In addition to her usual foray for fresh meat and produce, she had placed a special order for her favorite tea almost two weeks ago and hoped it would be in by now.

On the way, she passed the barber shop and it suddenly occurred to her that she hadn't had a trim in quite a while; the tips now reached past her collarbone. She debated stopping in for a minute, but then she remembered Itachi and the comments he'd made. He'd suggested she grow it out, said it would suit her. She hadn't missed the subtle hint that he would probably like that a lot, and smiled to herself as she thought about the way he always played with and ran his fingers through it. He seemed to have something of a small obsession with her hair. Who was she to deny him the little pleasures in life?

She kept walking, a radiant smile blooming as the winter wind played in her hair too.

Han the wagon driver, the store owner Tarou, and his son Makoto, were loitering around the register when she walked in. They were used to seeing her by now and greeted her in their typical frank, rural way. She said hello and asked about her tea, and while Tarou went in back to check for it she browsed the store for anything interesting.

She could hear them talking and gossiping about goings-on in town and what little news they had from the rest of the world. She mostly tuned them out, until one word sharply caught her attention.

Kumogakure.

Without appearing to, Sakura began listening to every word they said. Information about another hidden village's activities was always important. The Hokage was especially concerned with Cloud because of the fiasco over Sasuke. She doubted these rural civilians would know much, but sometimes civilians knew more than they realized, and usually didn't know not to talk about it.

"…scouts or messengers running all up and down the countryside. Several of our suppliers say they've been stopped by them on the roads, their wagons searched. Wonder what they're up to," Makoto was saying.

"Maybe they're preparing for war," Han suggested gruffly. The younger man looked at him in surprise. "Well that how it's done, ain't it? Sending messages and securing the border and all that?"

Sakura feigned interest in a book of quilting patterns and wandered a little closer. Cloud was probably searching high and low for Sasuke…that would explain the random searches and border control. It was extremely unlikely that Sasuke was still in Lightning, but it could be problematic for Sakura and Itachi. If they were scouring the country for foreign shinobi it would be unsafe to stay here much longer. The villagers didn't know where they were from, and as far as she knew only Junko knew they were shinobi. But to be safe, they may have to move to another location.

"Maybe you're right," the boy said. "The paper from yesterday says something about, uh…" He grabbed the paper in question and searched for the article, reading as he spoke. "Here: 'Skirmishes along the River-Fire border…' 'Two civilian villages in Fire attacked by hostile Rain ninjas…' 'Many casualties, both civilian and from Konoha'." He looked up at the old man. "Maybe the Cloud ninjas here heard about it and are taking, uh, what's it—precautions."

"Maybe. Rain ninjas, huh. Never heard of 'em. Well, I'm just glad whatever's happening's so far away. Last thing we need's a war coming. Always makes the market prices go sky high."

Makoto nodded sagely, and they moved on to other topics.

Sakura knew better than to think it was only precaution. Cloud wouldn't be raising security levels for a few skirmishes too far away to affect them. Something else was going on. She had a bad feeling it had to do with Sasuke's recent actions against Kumo, and consequently, Konoha would be dragged into it. The attacks by Rain nins troubled her as well. Rain was too small to have ever been a problem before, but Konoha had just recently learned that Akatsuki was most likely operating out of Rain and that their leader, Pein, was also the leader of Amegakure.

"Sorry, it's not in yet."

Realizing she was being addressed, Sakura turned quickly to find the store owner watching her from behind the counter. "Huh?"

"Your tea. It's not in yet."

"Oh." She had forgotten all about it, her thoughts now miles away. She forced a smile. "That's okay. I'll check back in a few days." She put the quilting guide back on the shelf and left the store with a deliberately casual air.

Outside, her cheerful expression fell and she began walking quickly out of town. She had to tell the Hokage what she'd learned. Tsunade obviously would know about the Rain attacks, but she wouldn't know that Cloud might be taking preliminary steps toward mobilization. There was no way to contact Konoha other than the post, but who knew how long that would take with half the roads closed for winter? Tsunade had said she would send Katsuyu to her for a briefing, but that wasn't for another three or four weeks. It couldn't wait that long.

Sakura began sprinting once she passed through the village gate, and rushed back to the cabin. When she got inside she found Itachi searching through the pantry, probably looking for breakfast ingredients. He took one look at her and knew something was amiss.

"What happened?"

Sakura quickly told him what she'd learned. "I have no way of passing on the information. I need to go back and tell the Hokage." Itachi regarded her silently, calm and collected as ever. "Do you think I'm overreacting?" she asked him.

"I think you should trust your instincts," he said. "If what you overheard is indeed connected to Konoha in any way then it's important that the Hokage learn of it as soon as possible. If it turns out to be nothing, no harm will be done."

Sakura nodded. "Better safe than sorry." She gave him a playful smile. "Will you make me another awesome breakfast before I go?"

Over their meal they talked more about what she'd discovered. Itachi confirmed that Akatsuki headquarters – if it could even be called that – was located in Amegakure and that Pein had control of the entire city. Things looked ominous all around, and Sakura ate quickly, anxious to get going. She didn't like leaving Itachi so soon after the last time, but she knew he was more capable of taking care of himself than ever. Indeed, their time here was drawing to a close in any event.

Itachi stood and went to the door with her. "Be careful in the open country, and while crossing the border," he cautioned.

"I will. You be careful too. If they come around here looking for shinobi…"

"I will be able to avoid capture," he said smoothly.

Sakura smiled faintly. "Right. Veteran missing-nin." She closed the distance between them, held his face in her hands and rose up to press a lingering kiss to his lips. "I'll be back as soon as I can." Itachi nodded and Sakura stepped back, slung her light pack over one shoulder, and left.


Much to her surprise and relief, Konoha was just as she'd left it. Maybe a little colder, but other than that everything was as usual. She'd worried the whole way, and the overdramatic part of her mind had even pictured returning to a smoking, desolate warzone. She definitely hadn't expected to find Izumo and Kotetsu half asleep on gate duty in the middle of what was apparently an extremely uneventful day.

Surprised as Sakura was to find everything normal, Tsunade was even more surprised to see her walk into her office unexpected and unannounced.

"Sakura! What are you doing here?" she demanded worriedly, clearly thinking something had happened to her or Itachi.

Sakura wasted no time reporting everything she'd learned from the unsuspecting villagers. When she finished, Tsunade sighed and leaned back in her chair.

"Well, that is troubling news. Of course I knew about the Rain attacks already. Several ANBU have been killed recently near the border, and then the villages… Ibiki thinks it's a distraction to draw our forces away from the village, but I'm not so sure. At any rate, I've had patrols around the village doubled, and the barrier is up. Nothing will slip past our guard."

"Well now I feel silly for rushing back here like this," Sakura said with a faint, self-conscious laugh.

"You did the right thing. There's no such thing as unnecessary information when it concerns other hidden villages, and the news about Cloud is indeed disturbing. I'll send out an ANBU team to investigate further. Now then, since you're here, tell me how your mission is going."

Sakura smiled. "It's going well. Excellent, actually." She gave a detailed report on Itachi's current condition, that he was well enough to train again, and how she had healed his eyes.

"Incredible," the Hokage remarked. "I definitely want to read your notes on that when you return. It sounds like we're almost ready to begin the next phase. How long would you estimate until he's ready?"

She thought about it a moment. "Three to four weeks, probably. Maybe less."

"Excellent."

"Is Naruto here?" she asked. "I haven't seen him in a while. I thought we might catch up before I left again."

"He's not," Tsunade said. "He's off training with the toads."

Sakura blinked. "…The toads."

The Hokage raised a brow, echoing her unspoken sentiment. "Mm. Specialized sage training on some distant sacred mountain. Who knows when he'll be back."

"Oh." It was disappointing that she wouldn't get to see her best friend for another long stretch of time. "I guess I'll get going then."

"Actually," Tsunade said, stopping her apprentice mid-turn. "Before you go, Shikamaru could use your help with some codebreaking. It shouldn't take long with you both working on it. He's down in room thirty-three."

"Oh. …okay." Feeling a little strange about the entire day so far, Sakura left the Hokage's office and headed downstairs.

Room thirty-three was the last in a long, dimly lit hallway of the archives wing. As she'd been told, Shikamaru was there, along with an analyst whom she didn't recognize.

"Sakura," Shikamaru said, surprised as she knocked and opened the door. "I didn't know you were in the village."

"I won't be for long," she replied, closing the door behind her. "But before I leave Hokage-sama wants me to help you with whatever you're working on."

Shikamaru sighed in relief. "Good. This thing's a pain in the ass."

The air was musty and thick with the smell of decades old books and files which were stacked and crammed into shelves all around the room. The window was open for ventilation, but the room was still permeated with the smell of old.

Sakura sat down at the table next to the analyst, who turned to her, pushed her bottle-thick glasses up her nose and said, "Hi. I'm Shiho."

She smiled at the frazzled-looking girl. "Sakura."

They explained the encrypted documents to her and Sakura quickly lost track of time as the three of them worked diligently at breaking the code. They worked well together, and were making good progress when suddenly the walls and floors rumbled and shook like an earthquake had hit. But the thunderous boom outside in the distance indicated something far more alarming than an earthquake was happening.

"What the hell was that!" Shikamaru exclaimed.

The three of them jumped to their feet and rushed to the window. There had been an explosion. Several explosions, simultaneously. It looked like a third of the village was on fire. In the distance they could hear people shouting and screaming. Shinobi were speeding across the rooftops toward the commotion.

Sakura's heart thudded heavily in her chest. Her bad feeling had been right.

Konoha was under attack.

"Let's go!" Shikamaru shouted.

Together they leapt out of the open window and raced down the wall and into the chaotic streets.


Next chapter: The Cataclysm