Thanks for the reviews! And for those who added my profile or this story to their notifications. I really hope that this story will live up to your expectations. For those of you are interested in the future of General Hospital, please check out my other story, GH: Second Generation. It features some characters from all three ABC soaps. There are some characters which I created. Thanks again for reading and keep reviewing! I like to know what my readers think of my work. Enjoy!
December 2009-
Lulu stared at the little white stick in her hand. In two minutes, she would know her future. And right now it wasn't looking too promising.
She gingerly set the test on the bathroom counter, ran her hands through her hair nervously. This couldn't be happening to her. Not now. Not again. She'd done this already, and had managed to move on from it.
But now it was different. A different time, a different relationship…and, oh god, a different man.
Johnny.
She didn't know what she would do if the test were positive. Johnny would do the honorable thing, she knew. His own relationship with his father had been rocky at best and schizophrenic at its worst. So if they were having a child, he'd stand by her.
Even if it was the hardest thing he could do.
Lulu told herself that she and Johnny were done. Their relationship had been passionate and volatile but there wasn't anything lasting. She knew that it was unlikely they'd ever make it work, even though they loved each other.
Lulu herself had moved on. Even though she wasn't seeing anyone, she had moved past loving Johnny. She knew that some part of her would always love him, would always love what they'd had, of what they could've had. But it wasn't in the cards and she was content.
Even Johnny, by all appearances, had moved on. Despite their considerable age differences, Johnny and Olivia were good for each other.
Lulu closed her eyes, leaned against the wall. She was supposed to be over him, but knew that if the test were positive, things would be forever changed. She sighed, glanced at the clock on her cell. It had been two minutes.
Taking a deep breath, she reached for the stick, read the results and let out a sob. Dropping the stick to the counter, she sank to the floor, wrapping her arms around her body and curling into a ball.
She knew now that the world as she knew it was forever changed.
And there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it but cry.
Lulu took a deep breath and pushed the doorbell on Carly's front porch. It was, she thought, déjà vu. Carly had been the first person she'd told before—the first time.
And here she was, again, pregnant by a man she couldn't be with.
She was afraid to say it, because if she said it, it would be real. She would have to face that she was pregnant. And she would have to do something about it.
The scariest part of it was that she knew Johnny would stand up. He would, she knew, be a father simply because it was the right thing. But the only problem was that she didn't want him to do the right thing because it he was supposed to. She wanted him to do it because he wanted to.
And she knew that could never happen. They just didn't work together. It was the saddest part of the whole thing. Nothing could ever change that no matter how hard they tried, they just couldn't make it work.
"Lulu?"
Lulu jumped at the sound of Carly's voice. She hadn't even heard the door open. She lifted her gaze to meet her cousin's eyes. "Uh, hi."
Carly frowned slightly. "Hi! Do you want to come in?"
Lulu nodded. "Sure. That would be nice. I was hoping to talk to you."
"Of course. I was wondering when you'd come by. You haven't even seen Josslyn yet."
Lulu's eyes widened even as Carly stepped aside to let her past. "Uh. That's okay. I'm sure she's adorable. You know me and babies. We don't exactly mix."
Carly laughed now. "Nonsense." She grabbed Lulu's arm and tugged her into the living room. "Sit."
Lulu slipped her arms out of her jacket, draped it over the arm of a chair. She sat down on the couch, eyed the tiny bundle that Carly was lifting out of the bassinet. She managed to hide her horror as her cousin gently placed the baby in her less than welcoming arms.
"I'll be right back. Just hold her," Carly said and slipped out of the room.
Lulu looked up, the terror evident on her face. But Carly was already gone. She sighed and stared back down at the little face. Josslyn was adorable; there was no mistake of that.
But, she realized, you couldn't exactly expect Carly and Jax—two of the most gorgeous looking people she knew—to have an average-looking baby.
Still, she'd rather look at her from afar. Breathing a sigh when she heard Carly's heels moving back toward the living room, she shifted the baby in her arms. When Carly appeared with a bottle in her hand, she shook her head at the offer to feed the baby.
Carly angled her head at her cousin as she took the baby and settled her with the bottle. When Josslyn was happily sucking away at the bottle, Carly turned spoke slowly, "what's up? You seem awfully quiet today."
Lulu took a deep breath, closed her eyes and momentarily wished herself somewhere else. Anywhere. Then she opened her eyes, stared hard at her cousin, knowing that if she had this much trouble telling her, it was going to be hell when she had to tell Johnny.
"Lulu?"
"I'm pregnant."
To Carly's credit, she didn't look completely shocked. For that, Lulu was grateful. She didn't know if you could handle hysterics right now.
"Are you sure?"
Lulu nodded miserably. "Three pregnancy tests sure."
"Oh honey, how? Who? When?" Carly lifted Josslyn to her shoulder to burp her.
Lulu let out a breath. "The usual way, completely unplanned. The who is a little more difficult—Johnny—"
Carly cut her off with wide eyes. "Johnny? I thought you were over him."
Lulu opened her mouth, then shut it again. Was she over him? She wanted to be over him, she had to be. But there was a major difference between what her head knew and what her heart wanted. "I'm supposed to be over him. It was one night, right after I got out of the hospital. One major mistake," she finished, the tears evident in her voice. As they fell down her cheeks, she furiously wiped at them.
"Oh Lulu…" Carly crooned, rising to place a satisfied Josslyn in her bassinette. She moved back to sit on the couch next to Lulu and gathered her in her arms. "It'll be okay." Lulu shook her head, but not knowing what else to do, turned her face into Carly's shoulder.
Carly held her cousin as she sobbed. She knew that this was especially hard for Lulu because it wasn't the first time she'd gotten pregnant by accident. And right now she wished to god that there was something she could do to take the hurt away.
When Lulu's sobs quieted and her body stopped shaking, she lifted her head from Carly's shoulder. Looking at her cousin through tear-stained eyes, she asked, "What am I going to do now?"
"What do you want to do?"
Lulu shook her head and shrugged. "I don't know. I want to crawl in a hole and hid forever. I want to run away and not be pregnant anymore. I want to go back to that night and tell him no!"
"But you can't."
"No! I can't and right now I don't know what I want to do if I can do any of the above," Lulu replied quickly. She pushed herself up from the couch and paced the length of the room. Carly watched her, waiting.
"There is one option," she said quietly.
Lulu stopped pacing. "I know," she said quietly, "I know." Then she turned to face her cousin, fire in her eyes. "But I don't think that I can do it. Not this time. I can't have the fact that I killed two innocent babies on my conscience."
Carly let out a breath, rose and walked to where Lulu stood by the window. She ran her hands down her cousin's arms. "Okay, then you only have one other option. You have the baby."
Lulu nodded, "I know." Her voice cracked at the end. "That's the part that scares the hell out of me."
"It'll be okay. You have me, your brothers, and your dad. You're not alone. You even have Johnny." She angled her head, studied Lulu's pale face. "You haven't told him, have you?"
Lulu shook her head quickly. "No. And right now, I'm not going to tell him. I can't."
"He needs to know Lulu. It's his child too. And before long, it's going to be obvious. Wouldn't it be better to get it over with now, rather than later?"
"I can't. I don't know what I'm going to do. But I'm not going to tell him," Lulu said definitely. She aimed a steely look at her cousin. "You can't tell him, Carly. Please."
Carly shook her head. "No, Lulu. It's not my news to tell. I won't say a word to anyone."
Lulu let out a breath of relief. "Thanks for that."
"Of course. I'm here for you, whatever you need." She pulled Lulu into a hug, rubbing a hand down her back. "How are you feeling?"
Lulu pulled back, looked at her cousin's face. "You mean beyond terrified and stupid? Okay. Not too much queasiness yet."
"You aren't stupid, sweetheart," Carly replied gently.
Lulu raised an eyebrow. "This is the second time I've let this happen. You'd have thought I would have learned my lesson the first time around. But no, it happens again. With a different guy."
"I don't care about the circumstances," Carly said firmly. "You aren't stupid. You aren't the first woman to have this happen. Look at me or Elizabeth Webber or…" Carly smirked "…Alexis Davis. Now she was a little stupid. I mean, three children by three different men."Lulu let out a breath, smiled because she knew that Carly was trying to make her feel better.
Carly put an arm around Lulu, hugging her close. "It'll be okay. I promise. I will be here for you, every step of the way. But first things first, you need to be checked out by a doctor."
Lulu took a breath. It was slowly becoming real. "I know. But not at GH. I can't handle that yet. There's a women's clinic down by the pier. I'll go there."
"Do you want me to come with you?"
Lulu looked at Carly's worried eyes. "Would you?"
"Of course. I said I would be here for you. I'll come to every appointment if you want. Just let me get Josslyn ready to go." She rose, placed a gentle kiss on Lulu's head before reaching for the baby.
Lulu couldn't make herself move just yet. She waited as Carly changed Josslyn's diaper and put her in the car seat. It took only minutes before Carly had her coat on and was ready to go. Taking another deep breath, Lulu forced herself to stand and mechanically moved to get her purse and jacket. Within minutes, they were in Carly's car heading toward the clinic.
Lulu didn't move when Carly parked the car in front of the Women's Clinic. She wasn't ready for this, she thought wildly, it was too soon.
Carly laid a hand over Lulu's, grasping it tightly. "You can do this Lulu. You have to. Remember, I'm right here."
Taking a breath, she nodded. "Of course. I can do this. Even though I'm terrified."
"Every woman feels this way. It's new—the idea that you are carrying a little human being. But it will get easier," Carly replied gently. She reached to open her door, giving Lulu a moment as she opened the back door to free Josslyn's baby carrier. "Ready?" she asked when Lulu opened her door and climbed out of the car.
Lulu nodded slowly. "I think so." She held herself rod-straight as she walked toward the door.
Inside the clinic it was a flurry of activity. Babies crying, children playing with the few toys in the waiting area. Lulu eyed the women who were sitting in the hard plastic chairs with their bulging bellies. For the first time, she realize that she would be in their places someday. Someday soon.
Even though she was carrying the baby carrier, Carly took a hold of Lulu's arm, pulling her toward the front desk. The blond receptionist smiled widely as she efficiently answered phones and held a conversation with another nurse at the same time. "Can I help you?"
"Yes," Carly nodded firmly, eyeing the petrified look on Lulu's face. "My cousin just found out today that she's pregnant. She needs the pregnancy confirmed and to be checked out by a doctor."
"Okay. What's your name?" the receptionist asked Lulu.
When Lulu said nothing, Carly answered for her. "Her name's Lulu Spencer."
The receptionist nodded, looked at her computer. "We only have two doctors here today and there are two women ahead of her so it may be a while."
"We'll wait," Carly replied quickly before Lulu could back out.
"Okay, here are some forms to fill out. You know medical history, insurance, etc. Just bring them back when you are finished." She handed Carly a clipboard and a pen. Carly picked it up and led Lulu back to one of the empty chairs.
Lulu sat down numbly. This was really happening, she thought. There was no way to go back, she had to face the fact that she was indeed pregnant.
Carly handed Lulu the clipboard. "Start filling these out. I'll help you."
Working together, it only took ten minutes to fill out the forms and then Carly took the papers back to the desk. Lulu stared at the other women in the room. They were all pregnant, she thought, all hugely pregnant. Even now, she was having a hard time facing the idea that she would be them in the near future.
Carly handed the forms to the receptionist and glanced back worriedly at her cousin. It was easy to see just how terrified Lulu was and Carly wished that she could just take the fear away. She suspected that it wasn't the fact that she was pregnant that scared her most, but the fact that this was the second time it had happened to her.
Carly knew that there was nothing that she could say or do that would completely relax Lulu. She knew from experience just how scary it was to find yourself pregnant and alone. The only thing she could do was to be there for Lulu.
"Carly?"
Carly glanced up when she heard her name called. Kelly Lee, her own obstetrician, walked out from behind the desk. "Hi."
"What are you doing here? Is something wrong? You could have just called my office," Kelly asked quickly.
Carly shook her head. "No, it's not me…or Josslyn. It's my cousin, Lulu Spencer. She's pregnant and needs to be checked out by a doctor. She didn't particularly want to go to General Hospital because of the obvious family ties."
Kelly's eyes darkened and she glanced toward the waiting room where Lulu sat. "Is she okay?" she asked quietly, knowing Lulu's medical history.
Carly shook her head. "Physically, she's fine. Just pregnant. Emotionally, she's a mess. Is there any way you could examine her. She knows you and will—"
"Of course," Kelly cut her off quickly. She turned to the receptionist. "Dora, I'm going to do Ms. Spencer first. I know that my other patients have been waiting, but this is a special case."
The receptionist was about to argue, but as cut-off by the endless ringing of her phone. Kelly didn't wait for an answer and only motioned for Carly to follow her. She walked to where Lulu sat and knelt down in front of her. "Lulu? Why don't you come with me? I'm going to examine you."
Lulu took a deep breath, glanced up at Carly and nodded. She rose slowly as Carly hefted the baby carrier.
Within minutes, they were ensconced in an examining room. Lulu held her breath as Kelly took blood and sent it off with a nurse to be tested. It would tell them that she was definitely pregnant.
"So, when was the last time you had sex?" Kelly asked, sitting down across from Lulu.
"Halloween," she mumbled, refusing to look at Kelly.
"Okay, so that would put you at about nine weeks. Have you experienced any morning sickness, nausea, etc?"
"A little," she admitted, still looking away. "Nothing too bad. It was the same last time too. I really didn't get sick."
"Then you are very lucky," she said with a smile, trying to make light of the situation. But Lulu was unwavering. Kelly sobered, moved so that Lulu was forced to look at her. "Last time you had options, you chose and you can choose again. Do you want to have this child?"
"I don't want to have an abortion, if that's what you're asking," Lulu said quietly. "As for what I want to do with it, I don't know."
Kelly nodded, noted something down on her file. "Okay." She rose as a knock on the door sounded. A nurse was waiting with a piece of paper. After a few words, she took the paper and shut the door.
"Well?" Carly spoke up for the first time.
Kelly glanced at the paper then at Carly. "She's definitely pregnant."
Lulu closed her eyes, willing herself to not fall apart. Crying wouldn't serve any purpose.
Kelly sat down across from Lulu, took her hands. "Lulu, it will be okay. I'm here as both your friend and your doctor. It will be okay."
"Oh god, I hope so," Lulu said breathily.
Kelly stood, instructed Lulu to lie back. She quickly examined her, both internally and externally. Lulu said noting, simply lay back and attempted to hold back her tears.
It wasn't until later, after they'd finished at the clinic, Carly had driven back to her house and Lulu had driven herself back to her apartment that she allowed herself to fall apart. She did it in her bedroom, crying into a pillow so that Maxie wouldn't hear. She didn't want anyone to know just yet. She didn't want to have to explain herself to anyone, to listen to their sympathies, or to their questions.
She just wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Because compared to the alternative, it was the best idea she could come up with.
So here's chapter 1. What do you think so far? Any suggestions? I can say that the first two or three chapters will be happening in present time, but the rest will be a few years in the future. Please keep reading and reviewing!
