Without divulging any incriminating information, let me just say I now know why Michael has been acting so strange the past few months. It kind of made me want to puke when he told us. I felt sick for him and I felt so sad. And thinking about this mess is like staring at a brick wall. There is no easy way out; it's a total dead end. Most of the time when something crazy happens, there is one clear right path to take out of it. But in this case, there isn't. Most of the time you know what is the right thing to do. This time, I have no idea.

What's happening with Michael and my instinct to protect him is making me think about Dante again. How even when he was lying, he was behaving according to his instincts. He never let the lies change who he really was. And it was almost like we felt this bond, this brotherly thing, way before we knew it. Sometimes you feel things before you know them. I'm not saying its some psychic supernatural thing. It's more like trust and faith. Those are things you can never see or put a name to but, when you feel them, you feel them.

Anyway, this thing with Michael and my dad and the law, hate to say it, but if it wasn't so darn serious, it would be kind of fun. It's like solving a mystery or, actually, trying to keep other people from solving the mystery that you already know the answer to. Molly's a big help. It's like she doesn't even need to go to school anymore, she practically already has a law degree. She and I finally broke down and told Jason everything we know and he was pretty helpful too. It's like he's a drill sergeant rallying us troops to my dad's cause. Or a coach or something. I like that neither he nor Sam talk to us like we're kids. They totally make us feel like we're all on the same team. And they seem to be pretty smart about thinking of ways to get out of trouble. Molly said something smart and true, though, when she asked Jason if it wouldn't just be easier to tell the truth in the first place. "Isn't it way more trouble to break the law than to follow it," I think were her words. Good point, Molly! But Jason didn't have an answer to that. I guess once you've spent so much of your life figuring out ways to get out of trouble it's hard to backtrack and try to not get into trouble in the first place. So, yeah, Jason is a good coach. I know he'd bend over backwards to protect any of us. But there's a lot of stuff he just doesn't have the answers to.

You know who would have an answer to all of this, if I went to ask him? You totally know who I'm going to say, right? Dante. He'd know exactly the right thing to do. He'd probably tell us to go to the cops with what we know but I think he'd do it in a way that made everything work out for the best. I went to see him in the hospital the other day. I almost started crying when I saw how sick he looked, his face was all gray and he had trouble breathing and he kept grabbing his chest and wincing every now and then. It makes me fell gross to know how he got there, who did that to him. I felt so sick that I wanted to run and hug him as soon as I walked in the door and tell him I was sorry that our dad was who he was. But I didn't do that because I needed to know if him being friends with me was just a part of his cover. And, of course, like I already knew, deep inside me somewhere, he said it wasn't. He considers me and Kristina and Michael his family now. And I believe it. He's even helping out our dad. I don't really get completely why, but he is. Maybe it's because what happened between him and my dad is personal and not really a part of the job he set out to do? In some way, he thinks what happened to him was his own fault? Whatever the case, it's obvious he cares about us. All of us. Maybe I should go to him now? Maybe ask him in hypothetical terms what the right thing to do is?