"Couples are wholes and not wholes, what agrees disagrees, the concordant is discordant. From all things one and from one all things." - Heraclitus

***

Two Years Before

September

Like many other things, nobody does college like Blair Waldorf.

"Blair," Chuck said through gritted teeth, the sleeves on his Marc Jacobs button down shirt rolled up to expose some very muscular forearms, which Blair had been staring at for the past three trips up and down the Weinstein steps. "You know all this stuff isn't going to fit in your room, right? It's smaller than your closet, Waldorf."

"Oh, hush," Blair said with her million dollar smile, running one hand down Chuck's back. "I was going to hire movers. You're the one who volunteered to come."

Six flights of stairs down, one to go. Blair was conveniently located on the seventh floor.

Chuck huffed. "Yeah, well that was before I knew you planned on condensing your entire penthouse into a shoebox-sized dorm room."

"Don't be overdramatic, Basshole. I only brought the necessities."

"Blair," Chuck said as they reached the top of the stairs. He set down the heavy brown box in his hands and crossed his arms over his chest. "You brought sixty-seven pairs of shoes."

"Like I said before," Blair reiterated. "Necessities."

Chuck sighed as Blair opened the door to her room, room 729, so that he could lug the last box in.

Last box lined neatly up with the other seven, Chuck turned to Blair and said, "You know, I still think that you should-"

"Not a chance, Bass," Blair said, sitting down on the dorm bed, which she had covered in a pillow top and one thousand thread count sheets to make it feel more like home and less like the same old dorm ick that everyone else experienced.

Chuck had spent the past month trying to convince Blair to move in with him rather than living in the dorms. And while the past two months their relationship had been insanely passionate, intense, and, above all things, satisfying, Blair wasn't sure whether or not she was ready to take that step. She had been ready to tell Chuck she loved him, to have Chuck finally express his feelings for her (God knows she'd been ready for that), to be in a real, honest-to-God nine-to-five relationship with Chuck. She'd been ready for all these things, and she knew that because of the way she felt when she thought about them, like it was now or never.

She loved Chuck. She was sure of it, one-hundred thousand million percent sure of it. She loved the way he made her heart race just by looking at her. She loved the way that he would call her from the office just because he caught a whiff of Chanel no. 5 and it reminded him of her. He brought her peonies, and ninety-nine percent of the time she managed not to throw them at him (the one percent was when he had the audacity to make fun of the turkey she had tried to cook. Of course, she didn't stay mad at him for long. There was a lot of screaming and yelling, mostly on Blair's part, until they both somehow, coincidentally, purely by chance ended up naked in the kitchen. And they definitely weren't cooking).

She loved Chuck in every way opposite that she had loved Nate. Nate had been her childhood sweetheart. He had scrutinized her every move since she was five-years-old, and when they were together, she was pretty sure that he still expected her to be the same person she was when they first met. He had never really accepted Blair for who she was, which had made it hard for Blair to accept Blair for who she was. She had loved Nate because he made it easy to try to be good, to try to be the perfect girlfriend, get married after college, have 2.5 kids and a white picket fence (not that Blair Waldorf would ever one of those), have the family ring, plan society events. Be stuck in the same poisonous rut for the rest of her life.

She loved Chuck because he loved every part of who she was. She didn't have to worry about being too manipulative or vulnerable or passionate or too anything. She didn't have to be anything other than what she wanted, and what she wanted was to be with Chuck. Really, it was perfect.

She didn't know what was stopping her from saying 'yes' to Chuck's proposal to move-in. Maybe it was the fact that she was bound and determined to do college the 'right way', and when Blair had her mind set on something, it was stuck there like Crazy Glue. Maybe it was that she had almost, almost moved in with Nate, only to have Chuck finally confess his feelings for her a few weeks later. Things changed so quickly, and Blair wasn't sure whether or not she was ready to keep up.

But part of her thought that maybe the reason she wasn't so quick to scream, "Yes Chuck! Yes I'll move in with you!" was because, the fact of the matter was, they just weren't ready. It was hard to believe, after all they had been through together, but even Chuck and Blair, Blair and Chuck had their boundaries. And this was one boundary they had not crossed yet. What happened if, when Blair moved in with Chuck, she suddenly realized it drove her bonkers that Chuck brushed his teeth in a counterclockwise motion when she brushed hers clockwise? Where did they go from there? Did they just break up over dental issues? Would it get that bad?

She didn't know, and she wasn't ready to find out. Not yet.

She saw a flicker of sadness pass over Chuck's face, but she didn't know how to tell him that she wasn't ready. It seemed sort of hypocritical, after spending so long pushing him and pushing him to expedite the process of their relationship, to be ready. To tell him now that she wasn't ready seemed too complicated, and for once, she didn't know what to do. So she resorted to what she did best. To what they did best.

"You know," Blair said, scooting back on her bed and raising the hem of her short navy blue dress a little bit higher, "these sheets are new."

The change in Chuck's posture was unmistakable and Blair was instantly turned on by the look he gave her.

"Oh, is that so?" Chuck asked, already leaning over her.

And then he was kissing her. Not just cautious, reserved kissing (not that that kind of kissing was really in their repertoire, anyways), but serious make-out-like-high-schoolers-with-raging-hormones kissing. Chuck's hands were all over her body, his tie was magically undone, and then the two of them were somehow both horizontal on Blair's bed, which she figured out was extremely comfortable. Chuck's hands were slowly sliding down the straps of Blair's dress when she heard a noise.

Someone coughing.

The two of them looked up at the same time to see the person Blair Waldorf loathed above all others.

"Oh, don't stop on my account," a smirking Georgina said, arms crossed over her chest. "We all know the world needs to be populated with more people like Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass."

"Georgina?" Chuck asked, adjusting himself.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Blair asked, a little bit dizzy from going from in her own little la la land with Chuck to infuriated in less than two seconds.

"Um," Georgina said, eyeing Blair's dress and gesturing towards the strap. Blair looked down to see her black bra strap showing, her dress sleeve loosely draped down her arm. Trying hard not to seem flustered, Blair restored herself to decency.

"Seriously, Whoregina," Blair said, following Chuck off the bed and taking a protective stance in front of him. "I forgot the part where I said I wanted you here. Leave."

Georgina laughed, and there was something so eerie about it that Blair shivered. "Blair, darling, didn't you get the memo? This is our dorm."

Georgina handed Blair a paper, and Blair almost threw up.

Georgina Sparks, WH 729

Roommate: Blair Waldorf, WH 729

"Oh sweet heaven," Blair said, feeling even dizzier than before, handing the paper over to Chuck. She was going to vomit. She was going to vomit all over Chuck's nice Italian shoes and in front of Georgina. She tried to compose herself, hands on hips in the same intimidating stance that had made dozens of freshmen girls cry. "I demand to know where you got that from."

Chuck put his arm around Blair's waist, pulling her close. She was pretty sure he could sense the impending meltdown and was doing everything in his power to prevent it from happening.

"It looks legit, Blair," Chuck said, completely ignoring Georgina.

"Oh, it is," Georgina said, leaning in the doorframe. "Just got the e-mail two weeks ago." Blair's eyes widened in horror. "I don't know why you look so shocked, sweetie. You should have gotten one too."

"I-I didn't check," Blair said. "I-I told the school-I specifically requested a single-"

"Hate to break it to you, honey," Georgina said, taking back the slip of paper and tucking it into her oversized bag, "but you're not queen anymore. The only one who follows your orders anymore is that one right there-" she poked a finger in the direction of Chuck "-and sooner or later, even he's going to realize that Blair Waldorf doesn't have any jurisdiction in thiskingdom. Or any kingdom for that matter. I have some business to take care of at the Gallatin office, so I'm sorry I have to cut this little party short. But I'll see you later, okay roomie?"

And then Blair was left speechless as Georgina left, shutting the door behind her.

It was all Blair could do not to scream. She gripped Chuck's hand tighter than she ever had before, her nails digging into his skin.

"Please tell me that did not just happen," Blair said, teeth grinding together.

Without missing a beat, Chuck said, "Let's get you a latte, shall we?"

***

Usually a non-fat vanilla bean latte was enough to calm Blair's seemingly always-racing nerves.

Today… Not so much.

"God knows what she's planning on doing to me, Chuck," Blair said, rapidly stirring her frothy latte with a half-crushed wooden stick. For the last ten minutes, Blair hadn't even touched her drink, but she had attacked it with such ferocity that the whirpool she had created with the stick would probably be Class 5.

"I mean, you'll probably come to see me tomorrow only to find me chopped up into little pieces and shoved in a garbage bag underneath her bed," Blair continued as Chuck sipped his black coffee with an engaged look on his face. "With my guts strung up like streamers in the room like, 'I'm a complete and total nut job and I killed Blair Waldorf'. Oh god, Chuck, she's going to kill me.

"She's not going to kill you, Blair."

"She's going to kill me and she's going to throw me in the river so no one will ever find me!"

Chuck reached over and stopped Blair's hands from moving by covering them with one of his own. He then reached up with the other hand and tilted her face up to meet his.

"Blair," he said, his voice so firm that Blair was forced to listen. She felt silly when her heart started to beat faster as she looked into his eyes. They'd been together officially for three months now, and every time Chuck looked at her like he was now, like it was painful for him to see her upset, she felt like that same, vulnerable sixteen-year-old she'd been in the back of Chuck's limo two years ago.

And just like that, her pulse slowed and her mind stopped racing.

"She's not going to hurt you, Blair," Chuck said.

"Why else would she do this to me, Chuck?" Blair asked, honestly curious. She knew that Georgina hated her, but why go as far as request to be her roommate? College was supposed to be a fresh start. And so far, it wasn't even close. "And she's enrolled at Gallatin. You know that someone majored in 'Evil' there a couple years ago? Maybe she plans on making me her final project."

"You know," Chuck said, his voice softer than she'd ever heard before. "My offer still stands."

And if she was being honest, it was one of the hardest things she had ever done to push that thought out of her mind. Because right then, it was so easy to imagine living with Chuck. Sure, they'd only been 'together' together for three months, but they'd been through so much shit that it seemed like their relationship had lasted forever. And living with Chuck definitely seemed like the most enjoyable solution to her Georgina problem.

But this was Blair's fight. Not Chucks. And she was going to prove to Georgina that she was still Queen, and that it wasn't going to change anytime soon.

"No," Blair said, shaking her head and smiling. "I need to do this. I'm going to end this once and for all."

Just then, Chuck's cell phone went off. She watched him glance at it, toy with the idea of answering it, and then put it away.

"It's okay," Blair said, eyeing his phone with an encouraging smile. "Pick it up."

"Thanks," Chuck said, thumbing the green button on his phone and pressing it to his ear. "It's Johanna."

As Chuck started chatting on his phone with Johanna, his PR head, Blair was a little bit proud of herself for the way she'd been handling the whole business aspect of Chuck's life. Sure, he was barely nineteen years old, but he was already in charge of Bass Industries, and that job definitely entailed a lot of work. When they'd first started dating, Chuck had left for a month to go to Sweden and Blair had been sure he was cheating on her. It didn't help that when he returned, he brought leggy, blonde Johanna along with him. She'd been so quick to jump to conclusions back then. But now, she was at least a little bit understanding that while she was the most important thing in his life, she wasn't the only important thing in his life.

"I'm sorry Blair," Chuck said, slipping on his jacket and getting up to kiss her. "There's some miscalculation in accounting and they need me there ASAP."

Blair smiled, trying to hide her disappointment. "I understand. Are we still on for dinner tonight?"

"I don't think it's going to happen tonight, baby. Johanna said the numbers were really screwed up." Here he bent down close to her, and smoothed a piece of hair behind her head. "Are you okay?"

"I'm Blair Waldorf," she said so strongly that she almost believed it herself.

Chuck leaned over and kissed her deeply, in that way he had. In only a few seconds he could make her feel more wanted than she had ever felt in her entire life. "I wouldn't want you any other way."

She watched as he threw a twenty dollar bill on the table and, with a last longing look at her, left the coffee shop and signaled for Antonio.

This wasn't the first time Chuck had left her in the middle of a date for work, and she knew it wouldn't be the last. But every time she watched him walk away, it still made her heart ache. She could smile and laugh and pretend that everything was okay, but it hurt her. And she didn't want him to see that.

Blair looked down at her coffee cup for comfort, only to find it was empty. She needed something to get her mind off of Chuck's work, off of Georgina, off of starting school in less than a week.

She needed Serena.

Blair picked up her phone and pressed speed dial number one.

***

"Oh my God, B," Serena said later that evening as the two of them lay on her bed eating thai takeout and watching Breakfast at Tiffany's. Blair had just finished telling Serena the whole story of how one Whoregina Sparks had managed to completly undermine the entire NYU housing system and Blair Waldorf in one afternoon. "That girl needs some serious therapy. I am talking beyond Dr. Phil."

Blair smiled as Serena said this and took another bite of her pad thai. It was delicious.

"Now that is the proper reaction to this situation," Blair remarked, frustrated with Chuck's seemingly disinterested reaction earlier that day at the café. When Serena looked confused, Blair added, "Chuck seems to think Georgina is harmless."

Serena propped herself up with one hand, facing Blair. "Now, I probably don't know everything about Georgina Sparks, but I do know one thing for certain and that's that she is a time bomb just waiting to explode. And it seems like you're her next target."

"I know!" Blair sighed, laying on her back and staring at the ceiling. "She's like a highly intensified, less perfect version of me."

"Aw," Serena joked, scooting closer to Blair on the bed just as a drunk woman in the movie started crying at her own reflection in the mirror. "Are you… scared, Blair?"

"No!" Blair replied immediately. "Maybe. Sort of."

Serena raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, she terrifies me. Like a monster in a closet. Except I'm eighteen, not eight," Blair said, flipping over so she was facing Serena. "I should be able to take care of myself, S. And it's pretty obvious that this isn't going to work. Either Georgina's going down, or I am, and you know better than I do that she has no boundaries."

"You know," Serena started, saying it so slowly that Blair was certain that she wasn't going to like what Serena was about to say. "You could always-"

"No, Serena," Blair said with another heavy sigh. "While our relationship is moving along at a steady and satisfying pace, I'm almost one hundred percent sure I am not ready to live with Chuck. Who knows what will happen if the two of us are under one roof for and extended period of time. The motherchucker might do something or say something that will force me to strangle him with his scarf. And I'm not sure living with Chuck is worth the chance of thirty to life."

"Well," Serena said, sticking her fork in a carton of noodles, "seems like that option is out."

Blair nodded and then the two of them returned their focus to the movie and their food for a little while. Blair wasn't sure what to say. She had no solution to this seemingly impossible problem, at least, not one that didn't involve life in prison or murder.

A few minutes passed before Serena suddenly jerked up, a hurricane of blonde hair and Gucci perfume.

"Oh my God, I forgot to tell you," Serena said, squealing like a five-year-old. "I've decided not to go to Brown."

"What?" Blair asked incredulously. First of all, how the hell had Serena spent the last few hours with Blair without even mentioning this little fact to her? Well, it was very like Serena to completely forget about something so important and then insert it randomly into later conversation like it wasn't a big deal. Second of all, why did she seem so freaking excited about it?

"I'm staying in the city," Serena repeated, as if Blair should know what she was talking about.

"And you expect me to be thrilled that you're giving up college so you can waste your time in the city for a whole year?"

"No, my dear Blair Waldorf," Serena said, smile as dazzling as ever. These times Blair could really understand why everyone was always so 'Serena! Serena! Serena!' She really was the most charming person that Blair had ever met. "I expect you to be thrilled that you are looking at your new roommate."

It took Blair a few seconds before she got it.

"We-" she said, pointing at herself and then at Serena. "are going to move in together?"

"Yes!" Serena squealed, bouncing on the bed. "We can get an apartment on Park, and you can go to school, and I can find a job, and we can watch Audrey and eat takeout every night, and then we can go and get scones and coffee every morning, and it'll be perfect Blair! Just say yes!"

Blair thought about it for a moment. She and Serena were best friends, best best friends, really. They had been since before either of them could read or eat with a fork or go to the bathroom anywhere other than their diapers. Blair knew everything about Serena. Serena understood everything about Blair. They both accepted each other for who they were, even when it drove them insane. Sometimes Serena was so air headed and effortlessly lucky that Blair wanted to cut off all that gorgeous blonde hair, and sometimes Blair could be so bitchy that Serena wanted to give her a headband like the corset in the old Snow White story, the one that got smaller and smaller until it squeezed the life out of it's wearer. They hated and loved everything about each other. They'd been through everything together; boys, growing up, high school. But one thing they had never experienced was living together.

There was definitely a chance that neither she nor Serena would make it out of their new apartment together alive. But they were grown up now, right? They were both mature, self-dependent adults who could manage to cohabitate and get along without killing each other in their sleep. Besides, anything was better than rooming with Georgina.

"Of course, S," Blair said, and then they hugged like only best friends can hug before watching Holly Golightly have her very own happy ending.

***

Blair stayed the night at Serena's that night, and the next morning they went apartment shopping. They found their perfect one within hours. Beautiful view, on park, two bedrooms, fireplace. And after a VdW check (they were going to alternate paying rent every month) and a quick background check, Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf were officially shacking up.

Blair hadn't spoken to Chuck since the night before, but she had asked him to meet her at the Palace bar for drinks so she could tell him her good news.

"Hello, beautiful," Chuck said in that sexy ass voice of his when he walked in, looking dashing as usual. He kissed her on the cheek, something that only Chuck could do to make Blair want to jump his bones on the spot. "What's the good news?"

Blair smiled slyly, twirled the olive in her martini. "I took care of Georgina."

Chuck leaned back on his stool, intensely interested. "Elaborate, please."

"Well," Blair started, "let's just say that Georgina's new roommate Esther is a staunch born-again Christian and she's very eager to meet our morally lapsed, wayward friend."

"Wow, Waldorf," Chuck said, amused grin on his face. "I must say, I'm impressed. How did you swing that one?"

Blair smiled. "My dad holds some sway with the Dean. I had him make a phone call. I didn't specifically ask for Esther, but apparently the Gods were working in my favor. I mean, Serena and I even found this amazing apartment this morning-"

"Wait," Chuck said, his voice suddenly tense. "You and Serena are-are moving in together."

"Yeah," Blair said, a little confused. "It was Serena's idea."

"So," Chuck said slowly, refusing to look at her, "you'll move in with Serena, but you won't move in with me?"

"What?" Blair asked, completely stupefied. When she had pictured telling Chuck about her plan in her head, Chuck was happy that she'd found a solution that was comfortable for everyone involved. She had expected him to be elated that she wouldn't have to spend an entire year holed up with the spawn of Satan. "Are you… jealous, Chuck?"

"No," he said, spinning around to face her. "I'm not jealous, Waldorf. I'm just having a hard time understanding what the problem is here."

"The problem, Bass? I think the problem here is you."

"Me? You're the one who's foregoing me for Serena."

Blair could feel the anger rising in her. "She's my best friend, Chuck. My best friend."

"And I'm your boyfriend, Blair," Chuck said.

Blair could hardly stand to look at him. He looked so hurt and angry and vulnerable and sexy all at the same time. It was impossible to comprehend.

"I thought you said that you understood why I wasn't ready," Blair said quietly, focusing on her martini. "I thought you were willing to accept that-"

"Just like you were willing to accept that I wasn't ready to tell you I loved you?" Chuck said, and it was like a slap in the face.

"That's not fair-" Blair started, all pity for him gone.

"You pushed me, Blair," he said. "I wasn't ready and you pushed me."

"Oh, and so you think the solution to this problem is to do the exact same thing that I did, huh?" Blair answered, getting off her chair and grabbing her purse. "We've talked about this Chuck. I told you that I was sorry for rushing you, but I wanted you, Chuck. I wanted you more than I'd ever wanted anything in my entire life, and I did what I had to do."

"You knew I loved you, Blair," Chuck said. "You knew it. You just wanted me to prove it."

"Just like you want me to do now," Blair answered.

The silence that followed was one of those unbearable ones, like after a particularly nasty storm, a silence that seemed unnatural for the two. Blair was fuming, Chuck was fuming, and together they were an unstoppable force. Now they were two unstoppable forces heading straight at each other. It was anyone's guess who was going to prove to be stronger.

They'd fought before, but it was nothing like this. It had started the same, zero to sixty in the span of a few seconds, like the eye of a hurricane. But this was something more. Blair didn't understand why Chuck was so angry. And even more, he'd deliberately brought up something she thought had been settled just to hurt her.

And she hated the fact that it worked. He knew just where to hit her to leave the biggest bruise.

"Excuse me," Blair said, trying to hold back the tears as she flung her purse over her shoulder, "but Serena and I have to finish unpacking."

She barely made it into the cab before she started crying.

***

"That mother chucking BASSHOLE!" Blair screamed later as she ripped open a box labeled 'FRAGILE'. "I thought I was finally going to be completely and totally happy for once in my life and he has to go and fucking ruin it!"

"Woah, there," Serena said, wearing a pair of uncharacteristic overalls that she still managed to make look sexy. "Easy with the glass, B."

Serena rescued the box from Blair's tyrannical hands and gave Blair a much simpler (and less dangerous task): the bedding.

Blair was still emitting smoke from her ears as she tugged the sheets a little too roughly onto their mattresses. They had ordered bed frames from Barneys, but they weren't going to be there until the morning, so tonight they were sleeping on the floor in the living room.

Blair got halfway through putting the Egyptian cotton sheets on her own mattress before she decided it was too much work and collapsed into the heap of blankets piled in the middle and started crying.

"B!" Serena said, rushing to her side and putting her arms around her. "It's okay, B. Don't cry. Chuck will come around."

"No it's not!" Blair said, her voice muffled by her sobs and one particularly large pillow. "He won't!"

"Yes," Serena insisted, pulling Blair up to face her. "He will. Now, look at me."

Blair did, but not before carefully wiping any trace of raccoon eyes away and composing herself. She was pretty sure she still looked like a mess.

"Chuck has never told anyone that he loves them before, B," Serena said. "And he tells you so many times it's almost sickening. He loves you, Blair. I know it may not seem like it sometimes, but what you and Chuck have is real. You belong together. You know it. He knows it. God, everyone knows it, Blair. And sure, you guys had a little fight, but that's what couples do. I don't know if you remember, but you and Chuck certainly didn't skip along in a merry little forest with all the singing woodland creatures before you got together."

Blair sniffed. "This is different."

"No, honey, it's not," Serena said, shaking her head. "And it's not anything to worry about. Take it from the girl who has been in way more relationships than healthy for a nineteen-year-old girl. Fighting is normal. And also healthy. As weird as that sounds."

"I don't know how to fix this," Blair said, tucking her head into Serena's shoulder. "I don't know how to show him that I love him, but I'm just not ready to live with him."

Serena stroked Blair's hair. "You don't have to, B. He knows it. He's just so madly in love with you that it hurts him when you're not ready to move forward. Think about it. You've always been the one to make all the moves, to push him to further your relationship. Now he wants to and you don't. He's probably just confused."

Blair closed her eyes, suddenly very tired. "I hope you're right, S. I'm not sure how much more drama I can take."

Serena laughed. "Okay, did you seriously just say that?"

Blair's eyes flicked open. "Say what?"

"Well…" Serena started. "I hate to break it to you, B, but you are, by a landslide, the most dramatic person I know."

"Hey!" Blair squealed, grabbing a pillow and throwing it at Serena. "I want nice Serena back!"

"Well then you probably won't like this," Serena said cryptically before a smile creeped onto her face.

And then she threw a large pillow that nailed Blair directly on the side of the head.

War declaration clearly drawn between them, Blair and Serena spent the next ten minutes running around their entire apartment and engaging in possibly the most frantic pillow fight that ever existed. There were feathers everywhere, boxes everywhere, and Blair was just about to aim the throw pillow in her left hand when she hear a voice.

"Am I invited to this little party?" Chuck said from the door, which the two of them had left ajar in their excitement. Both Blair and Serena froze at the sight of him. He was wearing his same work shirt, but with the sleeves rolled up and no tie in sight. In his arms was a bottle of champagne. His eyes were locked to Blair's, a smile on his face. Neither of them had to say anything to know all was forgiven between the two of them. She loved that about them. With Chuck and Blair, words weren't necessary.

Blair felt a smile slowly spreading onto her face as she turned to look at Serena, who was looking at her with the same cryptic smile.

And then they both took aim and fired at Chuck, who was already running to tackle Blair onto the waiting mattress.