Ok so this is just a last chapter before I leave on vacation. Nothing too big happens and Envy isn't in it... BUT THERE'S ANGST!

Liz: Well isn't that a change...

Ed: I was just thinking about how we weren't getting enough angst lately. Lucky us!

Envy: Yeah, woopdy, flippin doo.

Ed: THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT ANYWAY!

Envy: No, the authoress made me... I claim complete innocense.

Liz: DIE KALLYPSO!

Heh, heh... put down the bazuka you short demon...REVIEW while I scram!

It's funny, all the time I had been stuck in this world, all I ever wanted was to go home. And now, when the opportunity was being opened... I didn't want to go at all. Well I did want to be back in Amestris with Al and Winry... but not at the cost of losing Envy. I would take all his annoying jests and that annoying smirk that never left his face. I would take all of that and be grateful... I just didn't want him gone.

I wondered vaugley if this was how Envy felt when I died... he thought I was dead for almost two years... did this wear away after awhile? I wasn't sure. Why did I always end up wanting what I couldn't have? I couldn't get home when I wanted too... and I couldn't keep Envy alive when I wanted too... This wasn't equivalency... it was just down right torture... You'd think after enough tragedies you'd get used to dissapointment and anger and sadness.

Nope. It's still the same every time.

First my parents, then my brother. Then followed my revenge spree, killing those five men. Next the death of Nina Tucker, the death of that man I accidently stabbed. Right after that came Hughes' death, right in front of my eyes, then later followed Scar, Lust... and almost Ed. Now Envy... Great. Fan bloody tastic.

The question still remained as to why I cared so much about Envy in the first place. When had I first started caring anyway? Was it when he kissed me the first time? Maybe it was when I heard the story about what had happened with that other girl. I couldn't think of a set place... it was as if my emotional time line was blurred all together. But he had killed Hughes... he tried to kill Ed... so why did I care? He was annoying, cold, apathetic, sometimes cruel...

And... I loved him...

Wacky emotions like love didn't seem to be bound by laws of explanation. It just was. To an alchemist that was kind of annoying. Scientists always want to find an explanation behind everything... but love was a different story.

Lying on my bed in Gracia's inn, I dangled my state pocket watch over my head, letting it swing on it's chain, letting the light catch the metal surface. It looked like I was trying to hypnotize myself... maybe I was. Maybe I was trying to get my mind off that stupid, stupid homunculus.

I heard the door open down stairs and Ed's voice say "Oh hi Noah... you're back late."

Noah...

My fists clenched. I had forgotten to tell Ed about that traitor of a gypsy who was staying under the same roof as us. Slowly a slid off the bed and walked from the room and down the hall. My feet moved on there own, and I let them take me where they wished. I reached the foot of the stairs and saw Ed talking to Noah, who was looking considerably pale, like she had been scared to death recently.

Good.

"Oh, Liz." Noah's eyes met mine and a traitorous smile drew over face. "You're ok."

I didn't answer her. Instead I walked forward expressionlessly in silence. Then before anyone could stop me, I raised my hand and back handed the gypsy across the face sending her sprawling with a cry.

"Liz!" Ed stared at me in shock. "W-what-"

"How do you think they found out Edward" I muttered tonelessly. "About Envy? We were the only two who knew about him. Now wouldn't it be conveniant if they got their hands on a mind reading Gypsy?" I glared down at Noah. "She sold us out... so I got kidnapped to lure him in. This is all her fault."

Ed whirled to stare at the gypsy, whose hand was pressed over her cheek "Is that true?"

"...Yes" she murmured after a pause.

"Why!" Ed snapped. "After all we did... we saved your ass and you get into our minds!"

"I want to see your world!" Noah cried. "I want to leave this place and never come back! It's the only place I can belong! A place without war or hate!"

"There's no such thing" I hissed. "As a perfect world... There will always be hate, distrust, discrimination, jealousy... you can't go anywhere to escape that. Our world is flawed as heck, messed up beyond redemption."

"Then why do you want to go back there!" Noah demanded, her voice rising a few octaves.

"It's my home" I muttered. "But even so I would be willing to remain here... if only..." I gritted my teeth and turned my back to Ed and Noah. "But guess I can't do anything about it now huh? Good work Noah." then I stalked up the stairs.

"Get out." I heard Ed mutter. "You're not welcome here Noah."

I was sitting on my bed again, staring at my hands, when I heard the door creak open.

"Liz... can I come in?" Ed asked cautiously.

"If you want" I answered dully.

There was a pause before Ed sat down beside me, causing the bed to creak slightly.

"Liz... I'm sorry for everything... for what Noah did and for what Envy decided... and for my agreeing with him. I really am... I can't say anything that will make things easier I know but" he sighed. "But Envy is going to open that gate. You can't save him... but if you go there on Novemeber eighth, we can go home. We have to make something out of this. Sit here, holed up in this room and it will all be for nothing." He rested a hand on my shoulder, gently. "Don't blame yourself Liz... Envy made his choice. It had nothing to do with you... It was his own decision, nobody elses. You did the same thing once."

I turned and stared at him "The same... thing."

"Jumping in front of me" he smiled. "Fine... maybe it was your fault for getting us all here... it's time to go back."

I swallowed and took a deep shaky breath "I... I know..." I forced a smile onto my face. "You're right, it is time to go back... Tommorow is November eighth... We'll go then."

Ed sighed a sad smile on his face "You can't pretend to be tough around me anymore Liz..."

"Ugh..." I banged my head against his shoulder, remembering my sort of awkward outburst earlier. "Guess not."

Ed wrapped his arm around my shoulders "Liz... I promise I'll stay with you... you know you're like a little sister I never had."

"Even though I'm older than you?" my eyebrow raised.

"You know... the hieght throws me off."

"Screw you."

He was right, I had to make something out of this...

But damn it, that didn't make it hurt any less.

I could only hope that I would become too numb to feel a thing.


So yeah... short, angsty, depressing. All that good stuff.

Envy: About four chapters left if your wondering.

Ed: Also a reminder about the talk box thing. Drop any questions you have in with your reviews!

Liz: I FOUND YOU KALLYPSO!

AUGH!

Envy: Where did she get a bazuka anyway?

Ed: I'm... not quite sure

Al: REVIEW!