Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, for I have lost my eyebrows of bushy powerness!
Nin Tech
Chapter 6: When the Demon Meets a Maker
By Irritus185
He tracked his way through the darkened halls, eluding his pursuers with everlasting grace and aplomb. Did those insignificants peons believe that he could be captured so easily? No, he would make them work for it, for he was unto a god!
No mere humans could understand the machinations of his mind. The only one who could even come close was that who unbound him from the shackles of mortality. And even then, they circled each other in a never-ending trial of cat-and-mouse – one hunting before the roles reversed and he became the hunted.
Luminescent eyes peered through the darkness, already finding one of the fools that would dare to intrude on his domain. And it was barely a child, an awkward amalgamation of limbs and clothes that was as ungainly as it was unsightly.
It whispered something into its earpiece, and he could already tell that it and the rest of its pack had mistakenly assumed that he was trapped.
Such arrogance, such foolhardiness. Though they often clashed, he would never submit, and in the end, he would remain the one truly victorious over those that went against him.
For he knew the true meaning of terror, that which came in jiggly mass and crushing anatomy, that which would try to squeeze the very life-force out of him lest he escape its clutches every time he was brought back.
And they were trying to reclaim him yet again.
This would not stand.
His ears perked up, his eyes shifted, and something came diving out of the supposed shadows, another of the young males – the one that was not his eternal adversary. The youth released a bola, iron chain whipping through the air.
With barely a glance, he dodged under it, giving a contemptuous swipe at the foolhardy youth before spring-boarding off his head. The boy found his face planted straight into the ground from his ridiculously-powered legs.
He soon found the girl in front of him, a finely-woven mesh-iron net in his face. Quicker this time, and with more effort, he slashed through that as well, the shock waves from his arm cleaving through the barrier of sound itself and blasting the ingrate of a child off her feet.
And when she was down, he found his savior and destroyer, smirking in that intolerable fashion like he always did.
"So…it comes down to us once again."
He barely nodded his head.
The master grinned cheekily. "It was smart of you, hiding in an enclosed space like this. We would be forced to react to your movements, while all you had to do was hide and wait to line us up, one by one." He cracked his hands. "But now…it's time."
Hands flinging forward, glowing chains erupted from the boy's sleeves, spiraling towards him like those blasted serpents of yore. He knew he could not cut through them, and their maneuverability actually had an advantage in the narrow hallway. So there was only one choice –
To jump right into the maw of the beast.
He leapt through the teeth of steel, his agile feet finding easy purchase on the links, using them as a railway straight. He ran like a demon from hell, dodging each attempt to ensnare and popping out from the linked fence.
And with a tumultuous swat, he slammed the boy into the wall.
The master grinned as he slid down. "Not…bad…my adversary." Soon, he was still.
The now hunter raised his head in victory. Ha, now he was the master. No one would dare to clash swords with him now. Now he was free of-
He bumped into one of the numerous wires that crisscrossed every inch of the hall around his fallen foe.
Oh goddamn it.
And there was light.
Sarutobi grabbed the inkwell on his desk as it threatened to tip over from the quake that shook the Hokage's tower. His facial features remained unperturbed, as did those of the rest of the shinobi acting as bureaucrats for the daily mission debriefings.
Iruka scowled at the splotch of ink on the requisition form he was working on. Now he had to start all over again. He sighed and grabbed another one, taking care to see that none of his other papers were damaged.
"The usual?"
Iruka leaned in his chair to glance out the window at his leader's question. There was a tall spout of flames and smoke from one of the abandoned buildings in the residential district. He could almost smell the usage of pyrotechnics and gunpowder, even though the window was shut tight. He sighed again and turned to Sarutobi.
"The same, Hokage-sama."
"Gather the necessary insurance forms and bring them to the appropriate departments."
"Very well." Iruka stood and went on his way.
Just another day in Konoha.
"Oh, my poor, little Tora-chan! Mummy was so scared that you were all on your own."
Sakura winced as Tora's eyes popped out of his skull from Lady Shijimi's bear hug. "That poor, stupid animal."
Naruto saluted the cat, tears streaming down his face. "Good luck, my fellow ruler!"
Sasuke simply grimaced. As much as he hated the feline, he knew that no being in the world deserved such a fate. Had he not still had the scars from the last time they had been ordered to capture Tora, he would have killed the cat then and there to end its suffering.
Kakashi made his usual U-smile. "Team seven has completed its weekly rundown on Tora, Sarutobi-sama. Requesting a new mission for the day."
Sarutobi clamped his teeth down on his pipe. "Yes, well, allow me to scan through the current job offers and…"
There was a cry of pain as Shijimi dropped Tora, a long, puckered scratch on her pale arm. He took no time to run, dashing across the room and crashing his reinforced body through a just-as-reinforced glass window, yowling the cat's equivalent of, "FREEDOM!" as he escaped.
"Tora-chan, no! Come back to mummy!"
Shijimi ran out of the room, her bodyguards trailing quickly behind her.
Sarutobi blinked. "Seems a new mission has just opened up and-"
"NO!" Kakashi's, Sasuke's, and Sakura's voices shouted out as one.
Naruto pouted. "Aww…but I like fighting Tora."
"I'll muck sewers, change diapers, even kill a god if you want," Sakura panted, her face a lovely mixture of livid red and ghastly white. "But I will not go after that demon-spawn again!"
"She's right," Sasuke agreed. "As much as it trains tracking and capturing skills, I would rather gouge out my eyes than chase after it twice in one day."
Sarutobi fixed his gaze on Kakashi. The copy-nin shrugged. "It cuts into my porn time too much."
"But, but…"
"SHUT UP, NARUTO."
Sarutobi hid a smirk behind his clasped hands. He knew the overall effectiveness of team seven. Knowledge of the squad that housed the former jinchuuriki and current mad inventor (at least in terms of threat) was commonplace within both the ninja and civilian ranks. Though they seemed like a ragtag team at first, there was some semblance of the camaraderie that Konoha boasted of. Sasuke – who had once been completely withdrawn from a society that idolized him – had shown a friendlier side, if his increasing mild lack of apathy and derision proved anything. Kakashi – the one that had before failed every one of his possible teams – now showed an almost older sibling relationship (in the way that older brothers want to strangle their younger siblings in their sleep) towards his students. Even Sakura – who, from the records, had been entirely focused on the Uchiha dreamboat – now thought of both teammates' wellbeing, rather than only her crush's.
Of course, he had no reason to doubt Naruto's role, as the blonde himself had been the one to periodically report on his team's dynamics from the get-go. So he guessed he could offer this one respite to them.
The fact that his altruism, in actuality, had several ulterior motives meant nothing.
"I suppose I can assign you another mission then. You have already completed the required amount of D-missions, so I'll allow it." He fished a paper from the desk and waved it. "I have an a C-rank to escort an individual back to his country of origin. A genin-team and jonin instructor should be quite enough to fight off some minor bandits, if necessary."
The entire room froze except for Naruto who was still fuming over the fact that he couldn't go after Tora again.
Sasuke was the first to open his mouth. "You mean a mission outside of Konoha?"
"With people for Naruto to focus on that's not us?" Sakura continued.
Sarutobi tilted his head. "If you feel that you're not ready, I can always-"
"We're ready!"
Sarutobi turned to Kakashi. "Kakashi-sensei, what do you-"
"They're ready!"
"Are you sure? Because-"
"THEY'RE READY!" The secretary nins boomed.
Sarutobi rubbed his ear, the ringing sound refusing to leave. He should have known how the rest of the of room would've reacted. Let someone else deal with the reconstruction and hospital bills. He nodded at one of the sec-nins. "Let him in, please"
The double doors swung open, and in swayed an elderly and unkempt-looking man. An uncorked sake bottle was gripped loosely in his fingers, and his eyes had that bleary look that belied a man completely wasted off his ass. He squinted at team seven and sneered.
"This is the team meant to protect me? They look like a bunch of brats barely off the nipple." He limply pointed a finger. "Especially the short one, he looks like a right idiot to me." He smirked. "Eh, boya? Your brain get bleached through your skull?" He blinked when he saw the rest of the room tense, the blonde's squadmates and teacher throwing dignity to the wind and diving for opposite ends of the room.
Naruto kept his head down, his goggles hiding his eyes from view. "We're supposed to protect this man from dangers on the road, right?"
Sarutobi internally groaned and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He knew he should have made the bridge builder sober up before coming in. "Yes, Naruto."
"Which means that, as our – Konoha's – client, he's not paying to be protected from those that are native to Konoha or his hometown?"
"Yes."
Naruto looked up. The innocuous grin on his face made Tazuna stop. It became toothier, and Tazuna began to sweat. Naruto pulled his hands out of his pockets, several bombs in each.
"I love loopholes."
"So you tried to blow him up?"
Naruto crossed his arms at Tenten's bemused expression. "I made sure it was legally within the contract."
The members of team seven and Gai were gathered in one of the training fields. Over the past couple months, they had all become casual acquaintances, as team Gai being friends with Naruto had inevitably involved Sakura and Sasuke as well. At Naruto's urgings (and absent-minded promises of 'fun' if they didn't agree), the six had become a common sight whenever they were all free after training and missions were done for the day.
Sakura sighed as she bounced a fist off his head. Naruto squawked in indignation before shutting up at the look on her face. "The hokage had to deal with his ranting afterward. But he calmed down quickly enough after Sarutobi-sama offered a discount."
Neji leaned back against the tree, activating his Byakugan to idly check out the others' chakra pathways. For some reason, he found Naruto's fascinating. "Even if fate is no longer the true decider, fools are still fools no matter where they go. The man simply realized this and bowed in deference to one greater than him." He looked away, a superior smirk on his face. "Though I am sure the money helped in his decision."
"Naruto-kun, I am not sure what to think of your actions." Lee frowned. "Though the man's words reeked of unyouthfulness, your response was not proper either."
Sakura looked up when a realization hit her. "Come to think of it, why did Sarutobi-sama let you off so easily? You just tried to assault one of Konoha's clients."
The others looked at him as well. They had often wondered about the blonde's connection to the strongest shinobi in the village, as often portrayed by Naruto's informal way of talking to him and Sarutobi acting like an affectionate elder in turn, especially when punishment was in order.
Naruto blinked. "Eh, jiisan just loves me like that. Plus I made him an auto-paperwork machine." He shrugged at their confused faces. "He reeeaaalllyyyy hates paperwork."
The idea of the man known as the 'god of shinobi' hating the paperwork-side of ruling so much that he granted leeway to an obviously insane person simply because said person made it easier was just too odd for them to consider, so they dropped it and moved on to the next subject.
"So, this is going to be your first C-mission, huh? Where is it, Wave country, you said?"
"Yep! We start first thing in the morning while the client rests." He leaned back at their stares. "Don't look at me! He was completely drunk! They said he had to burn off all the alcohol before he even tried to make the long-distance trek."
Tenten put down the kunai she was fidgeting with and sighed. "Well, be careful. C-missions are the first kind to involve people that aren't associated with Konoha, so they have no reason to assist and may even attack you. And I've heard some nasty rumors about that country."
"There's no need to worry," Sasuke snorted. "Simple bandits and flighty rumors are nothing compared to me and the power of the Uchiha."
Neji tilted his head. "It is with thoughts like that that people find their head stricken from their bodies."
Sasuke glared back at his smile. "They wouldn't even touch me. Besides…" He nodded at Naruto, who had a glazed look on his face. "The dobe'd probably blow them up before they even got near us."
Naruto swung his head around. "Sasuke-kun! You do care!"
Hearing the utter saccharine affection in the blonde's voice – reminding him all too much of someone else he knew – Sasuke had to hold back a sputter while he looked away to hide the way his eyes twitched. When he was sure it was gone, he gazed back at Naruto dismissively. "That wasn't a compliment, dobe." He got up. "I'm leaving."
"Ah! Sasuke-kun, wait!" Sakura was soon after him.
Naruto shrugged. "Well, guess I better get going, too. Bye!" He was gone within a few moments, leaving team Gai all to themselves.
Tenten was quiet for a moment and turned to her teammates. "How do you think it's going to turn out?"
Neji smirked. "I give it a week before their client is dead and his village burned to the ground."
"Ooohhhh!" Lee cried. "I believe that they will protect their client and finish the job with flying colors! I would expect no less from my eternal rival!"
"I believe the same, Lee-sama. The odds are at 87.53% chance of completion with a margin of error of +-2.65 at their current level and mission difficulty."
Tenten pursed her lips. She looked at her gloves. The leather was lovingly maintained as were the kunai partnered with them. It was a good gift, and she treasured it as a good friend would. Naruto was…amazing, to be sure. But still, she did worry. Naruto may have his kinzoku jutsu but there were still so many unknown variables during a mission. They couldn't afford to be lax.
…ah well. She stood and stretched out the kinks in her arms and neck. Things would go all right for them.
…probably.
Sakura checked over her pack one more time. Kunai, check! Trail rations, check! Extra clothes, check! Mini-first-aid, kit! Toiletries…
She blushed. She had already reached that point in a girl's life where Mother Nature pulled her monthly visit. It would be embarrassing enough if she was just a civilian, but as a shinobi, being indisposed for an indeterminate amount of time could prove lethal. They had gone over the perils of being a kunoichi in ninja academy, and it was something that her parents had argued over profusely, but she wasn't going to give up that easily!
How would Sasuke think of her then? She blushed. Sasuke! Why didn't she realize that? He would see her biological weakness, and he would…he would…
"Wow, girls have it pretty tough, huh?"
Sakura stopped. Creakily, she turned around to face the familiar voice. Naruto was perched on her windowsill like a bird of prey, his head tilted, eyes pitying. She looked down at the packet of sanitary napkins in her hands. Then she looked up. Then she blushed.
Then she punched Naruto.
Right. In. The. Face.
"What the hell are you doing here?"
His eyes went blank before he tottered backwards and fell off the windowsill. Sakura blinked. Her room was on the second floor. He had just fallen out of a second-floor window after a head injury. Caused by her. On the day of their first C-mission. Which was (in a sense)only happening because of him.
She slowly crept up to the window and looked down. All she could see was a twitching leg poking out of a bush.
She grimaced. Oh dear.
The leg puffed into smoke.
Almost on instinct, she whirled around.
"Quick on yer feet, aint'cha?"
Naruto was sitting on her bed. He scratched his nose. "Post-synchronization is a hella effect. Feels like my sinuses are flaring up." He cocked his head. "Got any allergy medication?"
The tic that had recently exhibited itself in her cheek in the last month flared up. "What are-" Sakura looked at the napkins still in her hands, blushed again, and hid them behind her back. She snapped her attention back to Naruto, who was fidgeting with one of her paperweights – a frog-shaped one. "What are you doing in my room?" she asked cordially, swiping it from his hands and replacing it on her desk.
He shrugged. "Thought I'd pick you up."
Twitch. "And you couldn't come in through the front door like a normal person?"
He stared at her like she was the one who had a few screws loose. "Who wants to be a normal person?"
She stopped herself. No, her room wasn't the place for a murder scene. It was better if it were a dark alley, with lots of dumpsters (to cover the smell.) Besides, she didn't know how he'd retaliate. She doubted her parents would be happy with the second floor of their home blown off. "Why. That's very kind of you, Naruto-san. But I'm afraid that-"
"And I thought that we'd swing by to pick up Sasuke-kun as well."
The words died on her lips. "Pick up…Sasuke?"
"Yeah!" he nodded fiercely. "Thought we'd all walk together to the meeting point, like a team!"
"But…how do you know where Sasuke-kun lives?" As far as she knew, after the Uchiha massacre had occurred, the Uchiha compound was sealed off and Sasuke had moved to one of the more opulent apartment buildings. Which one, she didn't know, unfortunately. "..wait, how did you know where I live?"
"Easy," he said. "I followed both of you home without you knowing."
"…you stalked us?"
"I prefer 'tactical surveillance.'"
Sakura bit her lip. No, no, don't hurt the boy. He might forget where Sasuke lived.
"Shaa! Then we wait for him to take him there, then kill him!"
Right, that was a much more sound idea. As her inner side contemplated the pros and cons of various killing methods, Sakura smiled as sweetly as her namesake. "Okay, Naruto. Let me just finish packing and we can go."
"Okay!" he cried. He sat there, looking at her with all the (feigned) innocence in the world.
Sakura pointed at the window. "Out!"
"Okay, okay!" Naruto scowled. "No need to get so uppity. Geeze!"
Sakura clenched her fist. It was all for Sasuke…all for Sasuke…
Sakura gaped at the awe-inspiring visage of the complex in front of her. It had taken several levels of security to even get into the building.
At least it would have taken several levels if Naruto hadn't suddenly grabbed her and used his rocket boots to jet up the complex's wall to the fifth floor. Now she was gaping merely from the feeling of nausea and asphyxiation due to the onslaught of vertigo and screaming. Naruto punched the air in a shadow-box.
"All right! Forward!"
Sakura grit her teeth and repeated her mantra. "All for Sasuke-kun, all for Sasuke-kun, all for Sasuke-kun…"
She followed Naruto as he ambled down the hall. He stopped at the number '505' and began to rapid-fire the doorbell. "Sasuke-kyun~ Come out and play~"
There was a swift thumping of feet as someone ran to the door and yanked it open. Sasuke was staring wide-eyed at them, his hair a mess and his clothes disheveled. "What the hell are you doing here, dobe?" he whispered harshly.
Naruto tilted his head. "Why, to pick you up, of course."
Sakura smiled coyly. "Good morning, Sasuke-kun."
"Woooooh! Bed-head Sasuke! I can die happily!"
His eyes roving side-to-side wildly, Sasuke grimaced and nodded. "Yeah, okay, whatever." He leaned down to grab his pack by the door. "Let's just get out of here before-"
"Sa-chaaaan~ You forgot your bento, Sa-chaaaan~"
"…damn it."
Behind him appeared a beautiful woman in her late-twenties with raven-black hair. She was clad in a frilly apron with a chick in the center, holding a bento in a checkered handkerchief. She stopped. "Ara? Sa-chan, you brought friends?" Her angelic face had a confused and naïve look to it, making her even cuter.
Sakura shakily pointed a finger at the woman. "Sa-Sasuke-kun, who's that?"
Sasuke's normally apathetic face fell into one of deep and total despair. His mumbled reply was barely heard. "…my mother."
"Hi, Mikoto-neechan!"
"Ara, Na-chan? Is that you?" Her mouth went wide. "It is you, Na-chan!" She bounded forward, Sasuke slinking out of the way, and engulfed Naruto in a hug, his face shoved right into her not-so-insignificant bosom. "Mikoto hasn't seen you for a while! Have you come to pick Sa-chan up?"
He mumbled a reply through her boobs that she apparently understood, because her face lit up. "That's wonderful!" She turned to Sakura. "Ara? Who are you?"
Trying to get her brain to reboot, Sakura robotically introduced herself. "I'm Sasuke-kun's other teammate, Sakura Haruno."
Mikoto's mouth went into a giddy smile, her cheeks blazing up. She clasped her hands to the side. "Sa-chan has even more friends? Mikoto is so happy!" She dropped Naruto (who was twitching considerably from the total lack of oxygen) and swept Sakura up into her own marshmallow hell. "And you're so cute! Sa-chan is such a lucky boy to have such cute friends!"
Sasuke sighed miserably. How could he be all dark and broody if his mother insisted on being so happy-go-lucky? This was one of the reasons why having Naruto on his team was so annoying! He wanted to have some time away from the insane happiness! "Mother, will you please let her go? She can't breathe."
Mikoto released Sakura, who immediately started inhaling large quantities of air. She turned to Sasuke. "Moouuu, Sa-chan, Mikoto just wanted to greet your other teammate. If Na-chan didn't tell me what you did, Mikoto wouldn't know anything at all!"
"That doesn't mean you can suffocate her."
"Sa-chan~!"
Sakura coughed and pushed back from the railing she was leaning on. "How…? Buh what…?"
Naruto shrugged. "Remember when I said I followed Sasuke-kun home? Mikoto-neechan found me lurking in the bushes, and when she found out I was one of his teammates she invited me up for tea." He grinned. "We kinda hit it off." He leaned forward and whispered conspiratorially. "For being the former best kenjutsu experts in Konoha, she's really just a sweetheart once you get to know her."
Sakura looked to where Sasuke and Mikoto were talking. Well, actually, it looked more like Sasuke was lecturing his mother while she acted like a petulant child. She was even windmilling her arms in circles to accentuate her point, eyes closed shut and tears poking out.
"B-but, she looks so young!"
Mikoto stopped immediately at that statement. Turning around, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears and beaming a world-class smile, she grabbed Sakura's hands in her own. "You really mean that?" Sakura nodded uncertainly. "Mikoto is so happy! What should Mikoto do for you, Saku-chan? Mikoto'll do anything!"
"How about a cookie?" Naruto gave a thumbs up with his tongue out and one eye shut. "Mikoto-neechan's cookies are the best!"
Mikoto put a finger to her lips. "But there are no cookies now…"
"Then make them."
"Sa-chan?"
"Make her some cookies," Sasuke said, his tone curiously kind. "Don't worry, we'll wait."
"Okay! Just wait, Mikoto'll be back with some fresh cookies!" With that, the Uchiha matriarch skipped whimsically into the apartment. As soon as she closed the door, Sasuke faced the two.
"Run."
"Sasuke-kun, what are you…?"
Too late. Sasuke had not only run off, but off the fifth floor entirely, using chakra to dash down the side of the complex at break-neck speeds.
Naruto leaned over the railing. "That was totally bad-ass!" He put a hand on the railing. "Hey, Sasuke-kun, wait for me!" And then he was gone, too.
Sakura fretted for a moment and then shrugged.
"Oh, what the hell."
And over the brink she went.
Surprisingly, Kakashi was at the correct meeting point on time. Had anyone bothered to ask him why, he would have said that the sooner they were out of Konoha, the sooner he could point Naruto at people who weren't them and watch the fireworks. And the reason none them asked was because both Sasuke and Sakura were thinking the exact same thing.
See, insanity does bring people closer together.
Tazuna had backed away the moment Naruto showed up and put the jonin between the two, but Naruto would have none of that and walked straight up to the man, smiling in a friendly manner. Suddenly, he stopped a respectable two feet from the man and bowed deeply.
"I am sorry about our initial meeting, Tazuna-sama," Naruto said formally. "It was wrong of me to attempt such a thing against an honored client of Konoha. Please let it be known that this one will do all he can to make sure that you are received by your friends and family safe and sound." He extended a hand.
Tazuna looked at it as though it may bite him, but clasped it sturdily. "Thank you…boy. I…appreciate it." He leaned forward a bit when Naruto tugged on his hand slightly, overbalancing him.
When Tazuna was close enough, Naruto stood on his toes and whispered, "After all, I can wait until after we reach Wave." Then, with the most brilliant grin Tazuna had ever seen, he released his hand and walked merrily to his teammates.
Tazuna just stood there, his face ashen. Just what the hell had he gotten himself into? And why were they letting such an obviously unstable child in the ninja corps? Was their leader absolutely mad? He jumped when a hand laid itself on his shoulder.
Kakashi smiled under his mask when Tazuna twisted his head. "Don't worry. As a jonin, I should be able to stop young Naruto should he try anything." He closed his visible eye and retrieved his hand. "…probably." He took a step and said, almost as an afterthought, "Oh, and anyone who tries to attack us, too."
Tazuna felt his bowels loosen considerably.
However, several hours of traveling later and the blonde hadn't tried anything at all. He simply amused himself by babbling at his teammates, the rosette the one to answer most often, usually in exasperated tones, and the black-haired boy inserting a noncommittal sentence or noise every so often. Kakashi simply walked with his nose buried in a copy of Icha Icha, perverse giggles coming from him at times.
After a while, Sakura turned to Tazuna. "Tazuna-san, you're from the land of Waves, right?"
"Huh?" The elderly bridge builder shook himself out of his paranoia-driven semi-coma. "Ah, yes, yes, that's right. Why?"
She turned to Kakashi. "Sensei, does Wave have ninja?"
Kakashi shrugged. "No, not really. You see, each country has-"
"Whoo! Random exposition on the geo-political structure of shinobi within the elemental countries!"
Kakashi turned to Naruto and began walking backwards, his mask indicating a frown. "Are you quite done yet?"
"What?" he whined. "I'm always excited to hear about information that should be common sense to anyone that's involved enough in the subject matter." He shook his leg after stepping over a puddle. "Gah, stupid rocks."
Sasuke snorted. "He's right. That'd be the same thing as one of us not knowing what chakra is."
Sakura nodded. "I think so, too. I just wanted to know if Wave had a ninja village since its population density is fairly small. I know enough about geography and the economy to realize how ninja society within the citizenship works. I was top of my class, you know."
Kakashi said nothing and scratched his head. And here he was going to give a lecture that made him sound all intelligent and have his little genin looking up to him with worshipful eyes like good boys and girls should. "Yeah…well…" Kakashi gestured lamely. "Yeah. No, there are no Wave ninja."
"Really?"
"Yep."
An explosion went off behind them, wind whipping all around. They turned to see two somewhat charred bodies smack the ground simultaneously, their once proudly-shown hitai-ites shredded to their composite metal and cloth.
"…well, maybe not."
The two nin stood up shakily. They'd thought they had the element of surprise, especially when none of the Konoha nin had noticed the puddle and walked right on by. But then there was this small orb that had rolled to their hiding spot and then it had exploded and they had seen what a pretty color the sky was and ow did their backs hurt.
Sakura frowned. "Those are ninja, right?"
"Yup, they're ninja," Sasuke concurred.
"Oh hey, you guys found my bomb. Thanks!"
Tazuna wondered what the hell was wrong with these children. These were real ninja! They had dark clothes and air-masks and a really long, sharp looking chain that could rend flesh from bone just as easily as one could cut silk. So why were they just standing there like it was nothing to be bothered by?
Apparently the twin nin thoughts this as well and, wanting to correct such a mistaken assumption, both leapt forward at the admitted source of the explosion – Naruto. In the blink of an eye, they wrapped the serrated chain that linked the two around Naruto several times and pulled tight. Naruto was ripped to shreds, his body parts, flesh and blood littering the trail like discarded pieces of trash. The demon brothers turned to the other genin, seeing them as the next easiest target.
They intoned as one, their masks creating an eerie reverberation effect, "One little piggy..."
The Konoha nin did not look impressed. "Please," Sakura scoffed. "If he was that easy to kill, we would have done so a long time ago."
"Yare yare, you're really not earning any brownie points here, guys." Kakashi scratched his head, completely unbothered by the apparent murder of his student.
Sasuke just pointed. "Behind you."
"Peek-a-boo…" They could feel the breath behind their ears. A glimmer of light on enlarged canines. "Let me show you how a chain is really used."
Something coiled around each of their waists, cool and undulating. Then their worlds reversed as they were flung into the air. "Hey, guys! Catch!" Naruto unwound the hebi kusari from them and launched the two at his teammates.
In the air, the brothers oriented themselves so that they were better prepared. They unlatched the chain connecting their gauntlets, knowing it would only deter them, ready to do battle with the foolish little genin that dared to face them. Each were met by something that couldn't possibly be a genin.
Sakura had taken her brawler style to heart. With a resounding battle cry, she threw a powerful haymaker at the younger demon brother's face. He batted it aside with his heavier gauntlet, throwing Sakura off balance, and retaliating with his own jab. Sakura took the momentum from the spin and cracked a backwards elbow to the nin's face.
She yelped in pain as it connected with the mask, and hit the ground in a tumble. The younger brother advanced on her, once again throwing a jab with the sharpened tips of his iron glove. She blocked with a kunai, sliding the gauntlet off to the side, and tried for another elbow strike. This one connected properly at the base of his skull and sent him skidding.
Sasuke was doing just as well, if not better. Against the larger, heavier opponent he would have figured he'd have an advantage in speed but disadvantage in power, but when he gave a palm strike to the older nin's chest, he found the man flung backwards much further than anticipated. He smirked.
This was power. This was what he wanted. He wanted more, more.
Sasuke drove the man back, little by little until he was back to back with his brother. Then, catching the look on Sakura's face paired with the high-pitched cackle from above that was quickly growing louder, he dived to the side.
"Kinton: Inazuma Ami!"
The net was set and thousands of volts of electricity seared through the brothers. They collapsed in a smoking heap. Kakashi coughed as he nudged them with his foot. Nodding, he turned to his students. "Not bad. These guys were of the chunin level, notorious for their perseverance to always kill their target."
Sakura smiled at the praise, Sasuke hnned, and Naruto gave a loud, long squee.
"…wait, was that about killing me?"
"It was a joke, I swear!"
Kakashi turned to Tazuna. "Of course, now the question is why they, shinobi of Kirigakure, attacked us, shinobi of Konohagakure. I'm pretty sure we aren't on that bad of terms." Kakashi took a step forward, and the older man swallowed – hard. "So the only thing that comes to mind is that you were the intended target."
Tazuna glanced between the Konoha nin. "Errr…I can explain?"
Kakashi sighed. "Tazuna-san, I think we need to have a talk."
"So, what you're saying is that you lied to us because you couldn't afford the obviously much higher-priced A-mission since some evil business man name Gatou is trying to take over your extremely destitute country and the bridge you're building is the only way to stop him so that makes you a high-value target. Oh, and you're emotionally blackmailing us with your daughter and grandkid."
"Wow, thanks for reiterating his entire story, Kakashi-sensei."
"Okay, you know what? Here I was trying to break it down just to make it easier on those who weren't listening and you back-sass me. How about this then – the second we get home, I'll have Gai give his lecture on the flames of youth – with charts…and diagrams…and pictures."
"…I'll be good."
Naruto scratched his head, ignoring the tongue-lashing Kakashi was giving to the others. "Huh, you're kind of an asshole, aren't ya, Tazuna-sama?"
"What are you…"
"I mean, you obviously expected some highly trained individuals, and yet when you saw us, who were only hired because this was a low-grade mission, you just went right along with it knowing perfectly well that there was a high chance of us getting killed. And now you're trying to make it seem like you're the victim."
"Well if you put it that way-"
"I like you."
"Traumatizing our asshole client aside, this is a slight problem." Kakashi tapped his book on his hip, eye serious. "Considering the physical training I've given you thus far, I have no doubt we could take out any small-fry mercenaries this Gatou can hire. Against trained ninja like our friends over there…" He pointed at the demon brothers who were now conscious again and tied to a tree. "Not so much. I can handle myself easily, but I can't exactly protect our client if I'm busy the entire time protecting you three." He tapped the book again. "Although you did do surprisingly well against our guests."
"Naruto blew them up before they even appeared," Sakura scoffed haughtily. "How could we take them seriously after that?"
"Told you."
"Yes, well," Kakashi smirked. "Fighting against nins that are caught off guard and injured before the battle even begins is one thing. Up against nins that are fully prepared and fresh? Another entirely." He raised the book to his head. "So the question is – should we continue on ahead knowing full well we could come up against ninja that are much better than us, or turn back and leave our client to his somewhat-deserved fate, promised cursing aside?"
Sasuke snorted. "Even if they're better than these guys, I'll still take them out."
Not wanting to go against Sasuke and emboldened by the smashing success of her first actual fight, Sakura nodded as well. "I want to go, too. We can't just let Gatou do what he wants."
"Of course we're going! How else am I gonna get live fire testing on my jutsu?"
Right, that clinched it – crazy Naruto pointing his jutsu at the enemy for a reason meant that he was not pointing it at them when he was bored.
As the group forged on ahead, Naruto stopped mid-step. "Ah, sorry, guys, I forgot something. I'll catch up to you in a bit."
Kakashi shrugged. Eh, let the blonde do whatever he wanted. If he said he forgot something, he forgot something, and none of them would argue otherwise. The happier he was, the less injured they were…in theory. "Sure, but hurry up."
Naruto saluted the man and walked back. When he saw the rest of his team and their client was out of earshot, he smiled and then hunkered down in front of the tied demon brothers. He waved happily.
"Hi, guys! Sorry 'bout blowing you up, but my teammates needed a boost, especially the pinky, you know how girls are, and I figured the best way was for them to win a fight on their own but since you guys looked pretty tough I needed to soften ya up and that's why I dropped the bomb and it was pretty obvious you were in that puddle because c'mon it hasn't rained in a few days and why would there be a puddle exactly where we were walking and nowhere else and I've forgotten where I'm going with this."
He took a deep breath and frowned. Then his eyes lit with recognition. "Ohhhhh, right. So, I'm gonna be borrowing these…" He unlatched the air-masks from them, revealing two rather ordinary looking faces. "Huh, no wonder you guys wear them. Oh, and these and this!" He raised into view their poisoned gauntlets and serrated chain. "I can probably make them better so I'll return them when I'm done." He tilted his head, closed his eyes and grinned. "Thaaannnkksss…!"
He stood up, took a step back, and stared at them oddly. The two began to sweat. They had been taken for a ride by this insane little individual, completely and utterly thrown off their game. They were supposed to be Gouzu and Meizu, the demon brothers – scourge nuke-nin of Kiri! And the boy blew them up because he was trying to make his teammates look better? And now he was staring at them like he was considering how to cook them up and oh god they never should have followed Zabuza and why was this kid so damn scary and how could-
"Oops…!" Naruto raised a foot off the ground, his knee bent, using the worst stilted, obvious and camp stage voice ever. "I seemed to have dropped this kunai here within a difficult but not impossible to reach distance. Whatever shall I do? Hmm, I am sure it will not matter. After all, I am sure that these two ninja could not possibly get it." He pointed at the kunai next to his feet. "Wink wink."
Then he was gone, running as fast as his stubby legs could carry him, screaming for the others to wait up.
Meizu and Gouzu looked at each other. They looked at the kunai. They looked at each other again. There was no possible way it was as easy as this, no way the kid would make such an obvious ploy to engender their escape. It had to be a trap, probably some detonation that would be triggered when they got hold of the kunai.
But…then there was the fact that the kid was clearly bonkers. Maybe he wanted them to get out so that they would fly back in a vengeful rage and he could serve their defeats up to his teammates again. Or maybe he was actually serious about wanting to return their tools back to them. Or maybe just because.
On the other hand, it could just be an elaborate hoax to make them think he was crazy so that they would grab it and be reduced to their base compounds.
But maybe this was a reverse-reverse scheme to make them…
It was three days later and on the verge of starvation when they finally decided what to do.
"Hey guys, ambushed people say what?"
"What?"
"Get down!"
"Haha, told-" Naruto's laugh was cut off when the human-length zanbatou crashed into him, luckily deflected off his chakra-enforced hebi kusari-wrapped arms, instead only causing him to fly backwards and crash into a tree, smacking the ground in a boneless thump.
"Naruto!" Sakura's shocked voice echoed over his limp form.
Sasuke was just as surprised. One moment the dobe was cracking some moronic joke and the next he was on the ground, not…moving.
Kakashi gritted his teeth. "Damn it, Naruto."
He swung his attention back to the topless man standing on the tree branch from where he had launched his oversized sword. The others could take care of Naruto; right now he had to focus on this man. The zanbatou wasa clear give-away to his identity, but the cruel eyebrowless face that accompanied it sealed it.
Kakashi gave a half-nod, refusing to show significant vulnerabilities. "Well, it's an honor to meet you, Zabuza Momochi."
The demon of the mist's eyes crinkled in sadistic delight. His feast was laid before him, and he would partake in it with great relish. "As for me, Sharingan Kakashi."
"Naruto! Wake up! Naruto!" Sakura shook the blonde's body, trying to elicit a response, any kind of response. Naruto just shook with her movements, giving nothing else. "Damn it, Naruto, wake up, damn you!"
Sasuke bit his lip. The dobe couldn't go down that easily. If he did, then what was the point of even training with him for this long? Cursed dobe, he couldn't die.
"Naru-!" She froze when a weak cough came from the boy. "Naruto…?"
"Urgh, dang…" Naruto rolled over and painfully sat up, supported in part by Sakura. "…can't say that didn't hurt. Hundred pounds of chakra-tempered steel hitting at sixty mph is pretty effective." He coughed again.
"You idiot!" Sakura punched his shoulder, but her heart just wasn't into it. "What the hell were you thinking?"
"Umm…that I wasn't expecting to get hit by a flying sword?"
Sasuke sighed, swallowing the relief that had been in his eyes. "Dobe…"
Now that the moment of panic had passed, their attention was inevitably drawn back to the rising tension between their teacher and their attacker. Kakashi had one hand on his hitai-ite, prepared to draw it back. Zabuza had already retrieved his Kubikiri Houchou after its aerial arc from Naruto's armguards.
Zabuza smiled under his mask. "I'll ask one more time, Sharingan Kakashi. Will you not give the old man to me?"
Sasuke paused. 'Sharingan Kakashi'? But only the Uchiha had right to that bloodline. Why would their teacher of all people be named after the greatest of his clan's techniques?
Kakashi shrugged. "Sorry, but despite the old man being a miserly and annoying liar, he's still our client. So I'm afraid that's out of the question."
Zabuza shifted his hold on his sword, his guard relaxing to the untrained eye. To Kakashi's, he was instead preparing for a quicker draw when it came down to it. They were not going to get out of this without a fight. Zabuza's eyes narrowed. "I've heard of you, copy-nin Kakashi. When I was in the employ of Kiri's ANBU, I had access to all the bingo books of our rival countries." He bent his knees slightly. "There was you, a genius, a man who's known to have copied over a thousand of his opponent's jutsus and then used them against them."
This only deepened Sasuke's suspicions. The instant Zabuza had mentioned copying techniques, Sasuke knew something was up. But how come he had never seen this before? He had thought that Kakashi's moniker of the copy-nin was just something he had come up with to scare his opponents.
Sakura was thinking along the same wavelength. She just thought the jounin was a perverted adult who enjoyed torturing them with insane training and had developed a slight paranoid side since Naruto started to really act up. But he was actually an awesome kind of person?
Tazuna began to hope for the first time that maybe, just maybe, he would survive long enough to see his family and complete his bridge.
Naruto only smiled
Zabuza shrugged. "But time for pleasantries is over. I have a job to kill the geezer, and my client isn't a very patient man. If he complains anymore I might be forced to…cancel our contract." The lines of a perverse leer pushed out of his mask. "So I just guess I'll have to kill you all…Starting with you, Kakashi."
With a burst of chakra, he disappeared from the branch and reappeared standing on the surface of the nearby lake. With one hand outstretched to the heaven, and the other near his face, both in the ram sign, Zabuza leered. "Allow me to show you the greatest and most terrifying of my jutsus – Kirigakure." The last word was almost hissed, and he vanished completely from sight.
Kakashi grimaced. His hand moved, revealing the pinwheel iris of the Sharingan. Sasuke bit his lips to avoid gasping. Kakashi didn't take notice. "Move into diamond formation around the client," he said sternly, his tone taking on a new level of authority. "Zabuza is a master of Kirigakure's specialty – the art of silent killing. He'll try to catch us unawares by coming out of nowhere, so remain calm and make as little noise as possible." The students did so without hesitation.
Slowly, fog snaked its way around them. There was no reason, no wind, nothing to proclaim its coming. They refrained from jumping when Zabuza's voice, now distorted to the point it was almost unrecognizable, emanated from all around them.
"There are eight targets – throat, spinal column, lungs, liver, the jugular vein, the subclavian artery, kidney, heart…so many choices…" His voice rasped sinfully. "What shall I choose first?"
The team made no sound, no movement. Naruto slowly, carefully pulled down his goggles and flicked a switch. The world filtered out from the drab grey of the fog to dark shades of blue and indigo, interspersed with brighter colors of green, yellow, orange, and red where the others were.
There was no change.
It hit them.
An overwhelming feeling of hate, despair, outrage and apathy. It wanted to consume them, rip them to pieces and trod on the remains. Sasuke felt his throat clench up with irresistible fear.
This was not like the fight with the demon brothers – this was a whole new thing altogether. With the nuke-chunin, all he had felt was the rush of adrenaline and unwary attitude of one fighting something that was already defeated.
But this…this begged nothing like that. It only ordered, commanded that he lay down like the dog he was and wait for the sweet embrace of death to come. No, not even that – there was no waiting for death, he would want to come to it. All it would take was a sharp turn of the kunai, and…
"Sasuke!" He broke out at Kakashi's bark. He turned with Sakura and Tazuna, who had the same look on their faces as he assumed he did. Kakashi smiled gently. "Don't worry, I will not allow my comrades to die."
"Ha! You think I'd let him take my minions, either?" Naruto added for good measure. Somehow, that calmed him down more than he thought it would, which was troubling in a much different fashion.
"Oh, I wouldn't believe that just yet."
Something whisked right into the middle of their formation. It broke apart, members diving every which way to avoid the whirling blade in the center. When they glanced back, Kakashi was behind Zabuza with a kunai in the nuke-nin's gut. Then another Zabuza appeared behind Kakashi, swinging his zanbatou in a wide batter's arc. It cleaved through Kakashi like butter, the man bursting into a crash of water.
Zabuza's eyes widened. The jounin had copied his water clone within the mist? He felt something sharp on his jugular, and could tell who it was that held the blade. He chuckled. "You're quick-witted. That whole speech was just a way to buy time to make your own clone."
Kakashi pressed the kunai a little closer. "I thought it was smart."
Naruto's eyes narrowed. There was something wrong here. Zabuza wasn't emitting nearly enough heat for a man of his size. In fact, it looked like the only heat that was on him at all was the side nearest to Kakashi. But that meant…A flash of red coming from the rear.
"Kakashi-sensei, it's fake! Behind you!"
Kakashi twisted his body just in time to parry the blade headed for his skull. His hand snapped back from the impact, leaving his chest wide open. Zabuza took the chance to kick the man in the chest, rocketing Kakashi off his feet.
"You're good, Kakashi, but I'm still better!" Zabuza crowed. He jumped from his position and brought the zanbatou on Kakashi broadside, sending him flying into the lake.
The jounin surfaced quickly but felt his movements limited. The water was heavy and clung to him. His head snapped up as Zabuza appeared above him. "Too bad for you, but now you're in my trap." He flattened out his hand, the water crawling into the air to connect to it. "Suirou no jutsu!" The water filled out into a sphere, imprisoning Kakashi inside.
"It's really a shame, Kakashi. Here I thought this would be a simple smash-and-bash mission, and you have to go and make me work my ass off to nail one pathetic old man." He looked at the shore. "And that doesn't work for me. So while you cool off, I'll take the time to play with each of your precious students and then collect your client." His eyes crinkled again in that sadistic glee. His hand twitched inside the water orb. "I can't wait."
His free hand made another hand sign. "Mizu bunshin."
Something crawled out from the lake. Amorphous, jelly-like, it slowly took the form of a man, and then a perfect replica of Zabuza. It smiled. "Hello, brats."
Kakashi took the chance to yell. "Everyone, take Tazuna-san and run! You can't beat this man! He's a jounin, the same level as me!" He couldn't believe this. No matter how crazy Naruto was, how powerful his inventions were, it couldn't measure against a man who slaughtered an entire graduating class of genin at the age of six! And Sakura and Sasuke had even lower odds! "He can't leave without canceling the Suirou, and his clone can only get so far before falling apart! So get out of his range! I'll be fine!"
Naruto simply snickered. "Oh please, Kakashi-sensei. You think I'd run away when such an awesome target is right in front of me?"
The clone tilted its head. "Target?"
Naruto found a clean right hook on his face. His body went crashing into the ground.
"You called me a target, little brat?" Mizu-Zabuza tilted his head again. "You think you're something, with your hitai-ite and your rash dreams? You wouldn't even make a sentence in my bingo book. A real ninja is one who has dirtied his hands with blood and has seen the veil of death many times. But you…" He vanished again to lodge a foot in Naruto's torso and send him flying through the air.
"Naruto!" Sakura grabbed the boy and pulled him up to a sitting position. He hacked a globule of blood out. "Shit!"
Mizu-Zabuza grinned. "Are brats."
Sasuke took a look and then stepped between them and the clone. A kunai was grasped firmly in his hands as he settled into a stance.
He shifted his Kubikiri Houchou to his shoulder. "Even you, little duck? Do you not wish to see your next birthday?" Sasuke answered by lowering his center of gravity by widening his stance. "Hmph, I see. You truly believe in your delusion. But a real ninja…I…had already stained my hands before I was your age."
Kakashi narrowed his eyes. "The demon of the bloody mist, Zabuza Momochi.'
"It seems my reputation precedes me." The real Zabuza chuckled. His brows tightened. "Then allow me to paint you a story with the blood of hundreds."
Naruto opened his eyes. Crap-on-a-stick, that hurt. It didn't help that Zabuza hadn't shut up once since he handed the blond boy his backside. He really needed to stop sending his clones to training, get out of the lab more and get some honest-to-goodness real exercise. No wonder he could barely react in time to dampen the effects of the blows. Had he not managed to jump back at the very last moment, he didn't doubt his organs would have ruptured. As it was, he had some blood in his lungs from both the zanbatou and the kick to his damaged ribs.
"Kyuu-chi, how's the regeneration coming?"
"Regeneration is at 89% completion, doctor. One minute, twenty-one seconds remaining. All that is left is to mend the hairline fractures in your third right and fourth left rib."
"Urgh, at least now I can tell how badly I'm damaged. Before I just kinda winged it and hoped my bones didn't set backwards." He leaned forward off of Sakura's support. "How we doin'?"
"Naruto…?"
"Heavens, is he still talking?"
Mizu-Zabuza perked up at Naruto's voice. "Ah, you're awake. Surprising. I'd thought you'd be down and out for much longer."
Naruto smirked and wiped the blood from his lips. "Heh, I'm made from sturdier stuff than that."
"That's good. It just means that I have more time to play with you." He held up a finger. "Hang on a sec while I deal with your friend." Sasuke barely saw the blow to his ear, deafening him and destroying his balance, which made the leg sweep from the opposite side impossible to dodge. He went down, a wracked grunt and blood bursting through his lips when mizu-Zabuza stomped a foot into his stomach and ground it. "See? No problem at all." Mizu-Zabuza removed his zanbatou from its resting place and swung it up. "Time to die."
Sakura didn't know what happened. One moment Naruto was leaning on her and next he was in the air, hands formed into the reverse ram seal. "Kage bunshin!"
A dozen Narutos sprang into existence around the nuke-nin. "Get off my minion!" Thirteen hands grabbed thirteen bombs and let them loose.
Mizu-Zabuza raised his foot of Sasuke and batted the bombs aside with a negligent swing of his zanbatou. He followed through and cracked it into the real Naruto's side. The clones burst into smoke and Naruto fell to the ground, his impact softened by Sasuke catching him, the two tumbling when he did.
Mizu-Zabuza picked up the scraps from one of the destroyed bombs. "And what's this? Some little toy that you wanted to show me? Well, I'm sorry, but…" He slammed his sword tip-first into the ground.
"Playtime is over, brats," Mizu-Zabuza said as Sasuke brought Naruto back to his feet. He crinkled his eyes and spread his lips. "You call yourself ninjas, but you're nothing but children playing with toys. I am the demon of the bloody mist, Zabuza Momochi, and with all the power endowed in me, I command you – die."
"…enough."
Mizu-Zabuza leaned forward. "What was that brat? You not done playing with your gadgets yet?"
"Enough."
"Eh, what was that? I wasn't sure I could-"
A whine and a pop.
A hole appeared in his head. Mizu-Zabuza looked up at the inch-wide gap in his forehead before collapsing into a puddle of water. The real Zabuza's eyes widened slightly.
"I said…enough."
Naruto lowered his hand from its outstretched position, the barrel of the weapon in his hand fizzling with small sparks. His eyes were blazing, his mouth a tight line. He opened a chamber on the gun and ejected a smoking shell. Naruto flicked it into the pool that was once the water clone. Small arcs of electricity jumped from the surface. He gave the water a contemptuous glance before focusing directly on Zabuza.
"I was perfectly willing to play your game. I gave you the bonus of capturing Kakashi-sensei because I was sure he could cover his own ass. I even didn't mind getting my ass kicked, because I'm sure it deserves it every once in a while." He slid the gun back into a side-harness inside his duster. An incisor slid out from his mouth.
"But then you hurt my minion…" Sasuke didn't flinch that time, feeling something radiate off of Naruto that was completely unfamiliar yet not intimidating and almost…inviting? "And you mocked my inventions. So now I'm done dancing to your tune. Now…"
He smiled, more wickedly than ever before. "My playtime has started.
"Experiment initiated."
Zabuza was hardly perturbed by this change of events. He had seen guns before, but they were awkward and unwieldy and only those with no power actually relied on them. Ninjas did not use them because they were too loud, and what kind of ninja took away all of his own advantages in battle? No, this would not change things, not even the change in the blonde's demeanor, which had morphed from wide and unfocused to something defined and sharper.
He was Zabuza Momochi, and some little brat that had killed a clone that was barely a tenth of his full strength wasn't something to be worried about. But just to move things along and get it all over with, he supposed he could humor the child.
"Really? If that's the case then I guess I have to meet you halfway." He summoned half-a-dozen new water clones. Gesturing in disinterest, he commanded, "Kill them."
As they slowly advanced, each one with its own sickening grin, Naruto turned to his teammates. "Guys, I have a plan."
"I think you've done enough, dobe!"
"Just trust me, Sasuke-kun." A dozen more shadow clones popped up.
"No! Just because you killed one water clone doesn't mean you can just-" He paused when Naruto appeared right in his face, grinning happily.
"Just listen, silly." He took a single finger and poked it into Sasuke's forehead. The nostalgic action of a time long past cut off any rebuttal he might have made, and Sasuke found himself nodding obediently. Naruto smiled in praise. "Alright then, Sasuke, Sakura, I need you to buy me some time. A couple minutes should be enough."
He turned to Sasuke. "I need you to go with my clones and hold off Zabuza-kun's clones. Think you can handle that?"
Sasuke shook himself out of his reverie and fell back into his condescending smirk. "Of course I can, dobe." This was no time to fall behind. He had to get stronger, stronger! Strong enough to destroy anything before him! "If you could kill one, they should be no trouble for me."
"Okay then!" He glanced at his clones. "You hear that, you cowardly lot! You can't let our minions show us up!" There was a resounding cry that disturbingly resembled the Konoha beasts. Naruto grinned and fished a capsule out of his pocket. Cracking it open, a sleek kodachi emerged with a plume of smoke. He tossed it to the Uchiha scion. "Think this'll help?"
Sasuke gave a testing slash. Well-balanced, light, a good sword. Already the muscle memory of his mother's odds-and-ends sword training flowed into his head. He looked at Naruto, wondering if this was planned all along. When all he received was that same knowing, infuriating smile, he shrugged.
Pointless. All he needed to worry about was what was in front of him. He turned to the clones, and they stared back at the ready. With a snort, he faced the oncoming mizu-Zabuzas.
Sakura jumped when Naruto faced her. "Sakura-chan, I need you to protect Tazuna-sama and watch my back in case any of the water clones break through." When she started to deny her ability, he stopped her. "Don't worry, you'll do fine. I know you can do it. But just in case you feel like you can't…" He pulled five differently colored orbs out of five different pockets. "Some good luck charms."
She stared as they were placed in her hand. He winked. "For Sasuke-kun."
She looked. Red, blue, yellow, green, and purple. They were similar to his bombs but as large as two of them together. Sakura swallowed.
She took her stance. For Sasuke-k…For the mission, for all of them.
Naruto grinned deeper as the look on Sakura's face changed. Excellent…He turned back to the fray as Sasuke and his clones fended off the mizu bunshin, sword flashing through the air in a graceful if inexperienced dance, and set his feet.
"Kinton: Boruto Taihou."
His right arm flared with light underneath his coat, forming in the shape of a complex seal. The air began to condense around him, chakra rending the laws of physics as it brought out the weapon locked inside. It materialized little by little, a barrel twice as long and thick as Naruto's arm creeping forward. Metal slabs burst into existence, chakra shattering like glass as they wrapped their way against Naruto's shoulder, thick wires looping over and under and plunging right into his arm as they sizzled with untold energy, vents opening up to suck air in with a low-pitched drone. His arm bent back, the trigger formed.
"Five percent should do it."
"I would suggest one of the external batteries then, doctor."
"Roger."
Naruto loosened his hitai-ite with his free hand, revealing a choker of small metallic marbles. Taking one, he inserted it into an opening of the gun next to his ear.
"Start up firing sequence. Run off the external power supply."
"Roger."
The cannon began to hum, draining energy from the minuscule orb, chakra spiraling and collecting.
"Matogen, on."
His right eye dulled in color. The inside layer shifted and then flipped to reveal an aiming reticule. His vision went dark, draining to a clear green. Data streamed across the plane, mentioning safety-measures, vectors, distance. A triangle appeared, moving shakily. He moved the gun two degrees to the left. The triangle followed. Three degrees up. Now it was just to the right of Zabuza. His eye spun clockwise, the distance decreasing until he could clearly see the man's bloodshot eyes, the crosshairs right between them.
"Track five degrees left, one down."
Both cross and triangle connected.
"Lock-on, confirmed."
"Set the restraining bolts."
There was a whirring and three grapples connected to thickly-woven metal strands plunged into the earth around him. The clamps locked down. Gears reversed, pulling the bolts taut.
"Restraining bolts, confirmed."
"Begin final calculations and countdown to initial shot."
"Confirmed. Adjusting for magnetic fields, gravity, curvature of the earth, recoil. All accounted for. Margin of error is within +- .75. All parameters are green."
Kyuubi's voice heralded the end of days.
"Two minutes, fourteen seconds until critical voltage is achieved."
Bend down. Diving Falcon goes into Wild Bear. Parry with Roichi's Wall. Turn, stab into unguarded spot and follow with Crouching Hedgehog to avoid the counterblow. Fall into Static Tree against the barrage, counter.
Sasuke slid to the left as a kage bunshin took his space and blocked the decapitating downward slice with its armguards, slipping underneath the water clone's legs and dropping a few bombs on the way. Sasuke spun the kodachi up, deflecting a swipe from another mizu-Zabuza just enough that he could feel the wind from it passing by his nose.
He was frenzy, he was wildness, he was grace and elegance and death and retribution. He and Naruto's clones were holding their own, interchanging in their attacks to keep the water clones off balance. With a synchronization he never knew existed, Sasuke fell in line with the clones, blocking blows meant for them and allowing them to cover his flank. It was only their teamwork that allowed them to survive, as the water clones were stronger, more used to swordplay, and could outlast them.
In fact, the weight of fatigue was already pushing him down. Combined with the devastating attack from before, his constant motion and light parries were burning through his muscles like fire. He could feel them becoming heavier, more sluggish.
Perhaps the only thing that had made sure he lasted even this long was the sword Naruto gave him. Sasuke could tell it was stronger than average metal, since if he had tried to use a kunai to block the zanbatou's strokes, it would have bent and broken in no time. Even if the zabatous were water replicas, they still had the mass and sharpness to kill, and the kodachi easily kept in stride.
It fit his hand perfectly, warm and inviting to the touch. Had the dobe made this for him? Had he finally realized the power Sasuke needed to avenge his clan? And if so, why wait till now?
Sasuke slipped back. His foot caught on an upraised root. He fell.
Smacking the ground, he saw with increasing horror a water clone closing in on him. Sasuke rolled to avoid the cleave, but he was quickly followed. Little by little, he found himself separated from the safety-in-numbers of the shadow clones. And little by little, he found his defenses crumbling under the unstopping clash of blows.
A strike numbed his hands beyond the breaking point. Another ripped the kodachi from them completely. It clanged to the ground. The mizu-Zabuza grinned, freezing the boy in his sights. "So, it comes to this. I never would have thought that such a brat would deal me such trouble."
Sasuke rubbed a sleeve across his mouth. "I'm not like the others. I am a ninja."
"Such bravado as well. Very well, my little ninja, allow me to christen you by showing you death!" The sword came down.
The wind blew, the petal spun.
Sasuke dove to the side. He was tired, so tired, but he had to move faster, be stronger, live more, hate more, defeat all!
"It's too late for you! Accept your fate!"
Screw fate! Like the dobe had said, fate was his to command, to control! He wouldn't die yet, he would live on and conquer him!
It whirled in the tempest.
The sword swept up, and for a moment, for the briefest span of time, Sasuke could see it – he could see it! He dodged by a hair's breadth, tumbling at the shockwaves.
"Foolish boy!"
His hand touched the hilt. Tender, attracting him, molding to his soul. He wouldn't die, he wouldn't die, he would not die! Bare the fire of his soul!
"Die!"
The zanbatou came crashing down, and was sheered through completely as the blazing kodachi met it head on. The severed weapon fell back to its original shape, splashing everything. The sword continued, slicing the water clone crotch to face. It too met the same fate. Dirtied water soaked Sasuke's hands.
Sasuke panted, his nerves burning, his blood singing. He was alive. He had lived. And his opponent was trampled before him. He gazed at the kodachi, its blade still ringing with a nimbus of chakra, its edge crystal clear and sharp. A giggle climbed its way out of his lips. He had done it, done it! He had-
Movement just at the very edge of his vision.
One had escaped and was making its way to the target
"Sakura!"
She was scared, she was just so goddamn scared! What was she doing here? How could she possibly think she matched up to the likes of Sasuke, Kakashi, or even Naruto? She couldn't do anything! She couldn't protect Tazuna, she couldn't back up Naruto!
So why were her feet refusing to move? Why was the kunai still in her hands? Why didn't she just run?
Because she couldn't do anything else but that.
Because she couldn't let them down. Because she couldn't betray their trust. Because if she ran now she would be nothing but the little girl that Ino had once protected and she never wanted to go back to that place again!
So when she heard Sasuke's shout and saw the clone break free from the battle and dash at them, she bit her tongue to drown the screams and readied herself.
From the angle he was running, he had to be after…She threw a kunai at the spot where he would be next, causing him to deflect it and switch his attention from Naruto to her. The mizu-Zabuza crinkled.
"So, even the girl tries to stop me…" He glanced at Naruto for a second. "Fine, I guess I can play with you instead. After all, the toy brat looks like he can't move, so I might as well fulfill my contract first and move onto him later." He held out his sword. "So…how you gonna fight, girly brat?" He vanished.
"Like this?"
Sakura tackled Tazuna as the sideswipe from behind missed the top of their heads by inches. Tazuna grunted in discomfort. His eyes widened and he grabbed Sakura, rolling to avoid the stab that would have skewered them both. Sakura winced before standing up again, another kunai in hand.
"So, even the geezer enters the fray." The clone shrugged. "Why does everyone think they can fight me? It's stupidity on a fatal level. But I guess that's why you're a brat and he's a geezer!"
Sakura cried out as Zabuza smacked the kunai out of her hand and then backhanded her. She spat out blood, her cut gums filling her mouth up quickly. She weakly stood up again.
"Really? Again? Have you no shame, brat?" The water copy frowned. "I think that's enough. Now you're just getting annoying. And annoying things tend to die around me." He swung the zanbatou behind him in an exaggerated fashion.
Sakura grunted. Her hand bumped against something her pockets and she pulled it out. One of the orbs, the red one. Naruto's wink flashed through her thoughts.
"For good luck."
He wouldn't give her a pointless trinket, not Naruto. The boy was insane and stupid and utterly clueless, but he loved practicality and hated things that existed just to exist. So this was something to use, something to fight with. It didn't matter if she lost what sanity she had left, she would use it! She pressed the indentation. A prick of the finger and blood flowed.
The orb burned.
Zabuza sneered at the sight. "Another toy? It makes no difference to me! I just want you…to die!" He swung.
She tossed.
The two connected.
The air cracked into white as if struck by a flint and the water clone was consumed by a raging ball of flames that stuck and burned it to nothingness.
Sakura looked down at the remaining orbs in her pocket.
And smiled.
"Five."
Electricity ran rampant around Naruto, crackling to and fro and lashing across the trees, scarring the bark and ripping the leaves.
"Four."
His teeth chattered with tiny vibrations, ozone on the tip of his tongue.
"Three."
The realm of science gathered in his palm, spiraling faster and faster.
"Two."
A beam of ionized particles shot down the dirt road into the lake.
"One."
It zeroed in on Zabuza's forehead, a yellow circle of angelic light.
"Critical voltage has been achieved."
"Boruto taihou, FIRE!"
The wrath of god came crashing forth. A blinding column of light the width of a pencil erupted from the nozzle of the cannon, shooting forward, craving for something to sate its hunger.
It passed through a water clone that had stumbled into its warpath. The clone wasn't just destroyed, it was obliterated, the temperature of the liquid composing it reaching up and past the boiling point in an instant as it exploded in a burst of steam.
Sensing the danger, Zabuza snapped his head to the side. The laser caught his cheek, cutting and cauterizing the wound immediately and forming a long, straight burn from ear to nose.
Seeing that he had missed the target, Naruto turned the cannon, following Zabuza's movements. The man, unable to avoid any more in his position, released his hold on the water prison and jumped backwards. The sphere collapsed and Kakashi leapt forth, but even he had to submit to the strength of the beam and run as it caused the lake to evaporate on contact wherever it trailed, creating a scalding spray that suffused everywhere. Both jounin were lost in the deadly mist.
The beam cut out after a few seconds, and Naruto bit his lip in frustration. Five percent wasn't long enough or powerful enough! "Prepare the second barra-what?"
Warning sigils and signs flickered across his vision, refusing to follow his orders. "Kyuu-chi!"
"Doctor, the cooling system is malfunctioning. We cannot make a second shot in this condition."
Damn it! He knew he should have worked harder on the reloading process! He was too focused on making the initial shot that he completely ignored cooling procedures. He would have to work on that when this was over. But now…He growled. He would not let this stand!
"Kai!" The cannon fractionalized into a million pieces and was absorbed back into its storage seal. He slammed his heels together, the jets popping out and igniting fire chakra. He would not let this experiment fail!
The masked nin strained to see through the fog. This was not going according to plan. Zabuza-san was supposed to get rid of the target with little to no trouble, even with the addition of the renowned copy-nin Kakashi Hatake. And even if there was more to deal with than assumed, all Haku had to do was slip in and 'kill' Zabuza, pretend to be a hunter-nin, and slip out with Zabuza's 'dead' body.
But that strange blond boy had brought out that even stranger device and had proceeded to burn the entire surroundings to dust and charcoal and even catch Zabuza off-kilter.
How was Haku supposed to react to that?
A rustling in the trees caught the faux-hunter-nin's attention. Turning to the noise, Haku found that same boy dashing through the trees towards Zabuza's assumed position at an alarming rate. No doubt to try and capitalize on his success.
Haku fingered the senbon clasped in dainty fingers. Should the attempt be made to stop the boy? It was doubtful that he was too much of a danger to the nuke-nin, but every threat neutralized was an increased chance of them completing the contract.
And completing the contract meant they had more money to bring Zabuza-san's dream to life.
Coming to a decision, Haku crouched down on the branch to hide from view. Just one senbon would put the boy out of combat. Haku did not enjoy killing, but that did not mean that one could be exceedingly merciful. So one senbon to a pressure point that would cause immediate and temporary paralysis was best.
Steadying the branch to aim, Haku waited for the right time to throw a hand forward and pierce the boy right through his clavicle. But the chance never came when something splashed across the nuke-nin's mask, neck, and shoulders.
Paint…? Neon blue at that…
It was with shock that Haku watched as Naruto lowered the gun in his hand in mid-stride, refusing to drop his pace. "I don't have time for you," he said with a growl. Then he was gone amongst the treetops.
Haku was still for a second before leaping after the younger child. No one had ever managed to discover the nin's position when sniping. Haku's stealth and speed techniques were at the high chunin level. Zabuza had to be warned about the boy's skills.
Zabuza-san could not come to harm!
Zabuza looked back and forth. He couldn't hear or see anything. The hiss of steam was everywhere, blocking his view, preventing him from finding his prey. His eyes strained to find anything that hinted at the location of the Konoha nin.
What the hell was that beam? What in heavens had that boy done? It wasn't a jutsu, not like anything he had ever seen – a concentrated beam of lightning chakra, perfectly compressed and more powerful than any one he knew. Just where had the brat been hiding it, and what was he planning on doing now?
"And here I thought that the brat was just another stupid ninja-wannabe."
"Then you'd be mistaken."
Zabuza turned and grinned. "Ahh…Sharingan Kakashi. I was wondering where you had gotten to."
Kakashi rolled his shoulders, still tense from his extended stay in the suirou. The steam was doing marvels for it though. "You didn't think I'd leave my cute students to have all the fun, did you?" His eye narrowed into a hardened slit. "Don't fuck with me. I'm your opponent." He flicked the kunai in his hand. "Your move."
Simultaneously, their hands fell into sync and their mouths into an order. "Suiton: Mizu Teppou!"
Twin barrels of water burst from their mouth, colliding and canceling each other out in a new rain of mist.
Zabuza grunted. Something was wrong here. The water jutsu was an easy enough technique to use, but the same one at the exact same time and pace? No, the rumors of the mirror technique were just that, merely rumors. Perhaps time for a grander jutsu.
Again he started, again Kakashi mimicked him. Again the same cry came out. "Suiton: Suigadan!"
Spears of water stabbed out from beneath both of them. Zabuza ran in one direction, Kakashi followed, keeping the same distance between them, his movements precise and familiar. His hands formed into the tiger seal. No, this was a mistake. He couldn't-
"Be matching you perfectly?"
Zabuza paused. Monkey. Peh, he was just-
"A man, not a mind reader…right?"
Zabuza stiffened. Ox. "You are nothing but pallid shadow! A-"
"Shallow being who can't possibly match up to the real thing. I am true power."
"That's it!" Tiger again. "You're just a mockery, a sham! Allow me to wipe away that fetid illusion of yours from reality!" Rabbit. "Vanish-!"
A shade was behind Kakashi, a shade in the form of him. Its eyes were shut tight, but when they opened he saw it – the pinwheel of death spun within its irises.
But that was impossible, he was-!
And bird. "Suiton: Daibakufu no Ju-!"
As Kakashi finished the final seal, something came at him. The mist bellowed forward, like a mutant growth, and then split open. A water clone barreled into the battlefield, skin scalded a deep red, tackling the man and driving him further into the mist. The concentration of chakra dissipated as the interrupted jutsu faded away.
Zabuza was still and then almost collapsed. He couldn't believe it, he couldn't believe that the man was real. Kakashi had finished his mirrored technique before the original. If that clone hadn't randomly run onto the scene, Zabuza knew he wouldn't have been able to win. Could the man really see the future? Were the rumors and shady legends true?
No, it couldn't be…He was-
"Kae tebukuro, drill version!"
Zabuza instinctively raised his sword as the blonde burst from the mist, the spinning drill on his right hand puncturing right through the steam and forming a cyclonic effect, dispersing it behind him into a spiral tunnel. The drill connected, sparks flew, and Naruto tried to force his way through. The nuke-nin leered at the sight of blond hair. Maybe now he could break this illusion
"You're still alive, brat!"
"I can't let my experiment get the best of me. You're mine until I say otherwise!"
"Ho! Big words for a child!" he roared, using both his hands to throw the boy off of him.
Naruto hit the water and slid before gaining traction and dashing back. He punched again with the drill, shooting up with the shield to block Zabuza's crushing blow. He fell down and slipped forward, attempting to smash the shield against the man's open stomach.
Zabuza retaliated by kicking it head-on, his greater strength knocking the boy back. He then flipped his zanbato to one hand and moved it sideways, the other arm underneath, before catching Naruto on the sword's end and flicking him like into the air like a catapult.
Naruto caught himself and flipped away, landing softly on the water's surface. His left hand came up, deflecting the punch while his right came down to skewer the leg. The sword met it again, point whirring against the immovable side in futility.
Again and again the routine repeated itself – Naruto barely blocking any martial attacks while every single one of his was quickly and thoroughly stopped by the crushing wall of metal. But he was tiring, and this had to end now.
"Kyuu-chi?"
"Rerouting chakra to the legs and feet. Resonance frequency found. Disrupting in two, one…"
Chakra surged from his soles, disturbing the surface tension of the water beneath them. Zabuza had to jump backwards lest he fall through, and Naruto took the chance to add some distance of his own.
He gazed across the lake. Zabuza once again shifted his hold on his zanbatou, the partially defensive stance turning into a full-out offensive one. He laughed wickedly. "That's a great sword!"
Zabuza smiled. "Isn't it? My Kubikiri Houchou never fails to decapitate my foes."
"A chakra-tempered iron-based compound to allow for its weight, making it ideal to simply crush its enemies. But those circles have an almost monofilament edge, allowing a cut down to the molecular level. A perfect weapon for a man who enjoys the sight of blood. But…" He snapped his fingers, a basic police baton manifesting in his hands, the handle with a covered wire leading into his left sleeve. He snapped it to his leg, extending it. "There's one very basic, very fatal flaw in its construction."
Zabuza heaved it up. "And that is…?" he asked, almost innocently.
"Iron is extremely electrically conductive!" His hand with the baton whipped out. "Kinton: Hiraishin! Fire!"
Lightning poured from the end into a destructive arc, dancing on the surface of the lake and going through the sword straight up into Zabuza's arms. He yelled in pain as his own weapon shocked his entire body. Falling to his knees, he slightly smoked while the smell of burnt flesh rose into the air.
A second later, he convulsed once, twice, and rose to his feet. He looked at his zanbatou. Its once gleaming surface was now tarnished from the electric burns. Zabuza looked up, an expression of absolute fury on his face. "You sullied my blade." His voice was tight.
"Like I said, this is my experiment and as the subject, I can do whatever I want with you."
"You sullied my blade."
"Eh? Now who's the one that can't stop repeating himself?"
"You sullied my BLADE!"
A crater formed in the water beneath Zabuza and then crashed outward, waves spreading from the epicenter. "A sword that belongs to one of the swordsman of the mist! The most beautiful and powerful swords in the elemental countries! And you dared to try and ruin it?" Bloodrage flowed from him like a wild animal, nearly knocking Naruto off his feet from the intensity. "I'll kill you!"
He kicked off, rocketing at Naruto at insane speeds. Naruto shot off several more volleys with the hiraishin, but Zabuza simply took each one, none of them slowing him down in the slightest. When he reached the boy, he shot a fist out in a blur, impacting with Naruto's stomach. He then followed with an uppercut, shooting the boy into the air.
His hands sped into a lengthy string of seals.
When Naruto opened his eyes, he saw an enormous dragon of water curling through the sky. Its jaws closed themselves around him.
"Oh shit."
Zabuza watched as the suiryuudan blew up, the brat's body hitting the waves and sinking below the surface. He smirked. Damn brat, thinking he could win. Now all he had to do was find Kakashi and kill him too. He might need the aid of Haku quicker than expected, but he would kill the man and complete his contract.
He turned to leave.
~Drip~
Something caught him.
~Drip~
Something wanted him.
~Drip~
Something demanded him.
Zabuza slowly looked over his shoulder. What he saw froze him, his thoughts, his beliefs, and his heart straight to the core.
A hand was above the surface of the lake. It was scratched and mangled, but it was there. And then…it moved.
Slowly but surely it bent down and touched the surface. The rest of its body crawled from beneath the depths. Blond hair followed by a whiskered face and dirty orange duster and ripped overalls and scuffed boots. It was bloodied, beaten, but in no way defeated.
Zabuza trembled. An unknown emotion clawed at his brain.
Two eyes of glacial blue stared back at him.
"Damn it…" he whispered. "Why aren't you dead?" He lifted up Kubikiri Houchou and pointed it at the boy. "Why won't you stay down?"
"I have a dream. I will have this world bow down to me, and all who live in it will become mine to do as I please." His words were sweet like honey, laced with velvet, and as toxic as a cobra. His eyes never changed, never widened nor narrowed, never grew darker or brighter. They were the same piercing eyes since the day he was born and the day he was born anew. "No one will stand in my way. I will lord over all."
"Damn it…don't think you can talk so mightily, brat!" Why was he saying it like that? That treacherous tone! Did he think he was afraid? Afraid of this…child? Impossible! He was Zabuza, demon of the mist! He was not afraid of anything living. "Who'd ever bow to you?"
"Didn't I say, Zabuza-kun?" His tone gentler than before. "I said you were mine, and I will have you." Lips curled. "Always."
He snapped. With a roar of rage, Zabuza ran forward and smashed the boy with his zanbatou.
Naruto skipped across the lake like a stone, rolling endlessly. The smile never left his face.
Contact.
"Kinton: Ukabeita!"
The board of sky and sea spilled forth, fastening to his feet and propping him up, the momentum still carrying him backwards.
Pull the switch.
"Kinton: Kuuki Ouisogi! Jet mode!"
His back lit up, a frame of metal and leather latching around him from the seal of souls, wings unfolding outward and afterburners blazing forth. He slowed.
Shoot the moon.
"Kinton Revised! Combo: Flight of the Osprey!"
Water droplets hung in the air. The wind blew without a care across his face. The sun shined down from the morning sky, basking everything in its ever-loving warmth. He flew.
Zabuza had no time to react as Naruto hurtled at him like a demonic cannonball. The boy collided with him, knocking them both over and into the mango grove encroaching on the lake. He felt links of cold ice wrap around his arms, and the glint of canine teeth on a vulpine face consumed his vision. Zabuza roared and headbutted the boy. Blood flowed from his broken nose but he refused to stop grinning.
"This is impossible! I'm Zabuza Momichi, demon of the bloody mist! I! Refuse! To be! Beaten! By! A! Brat!" With each word he slammed his forehead against Naruto's face, breaking it even further.
Blood burbling, Naruto laughed brokenly. His voice was tainted with death, calling out for its mark. Zabuza's heart and brain felt it squeeze them. He now recognized the emotion, though he refused to believe it.
"You call yourself a demon, but you're nothing but an imp drunk off the smell of blood. I am Naruto Uzumaki, future god of this inferior and broken world, and by the power that I am, I command you…"
Something poked into Zabuza's chest. It was the lightning baton.
"Burn."
Fear and captivity had come to claim him.
"Full power. Switch on."
The world turned to crimson amber and melted into the abyss.
Kakashi finished off the clone with a stab to the heart. He couldn't believe he had been interrupted just at the climax of his victory. He knew if he had been able to complete the jutsu, Zabuza would have been beaten both physically and psychologically. It was one of the main reasons he lauded his copying skills so openly – to insert fear into his opponent's minds and break them down to the level of children.
Now he had to catch the real Zabuza again before he came across any of his students. But in the warm mist, he couldn't see a thing. He was lucky that it had been thin enough near Zabuza to actually use the Sharingan. Now if he could only determine the direction he had come from and-
Something in his chakra senses tingled. Then it pulsed. Then it screamed.
The lake exploded.
Kakashi jumped to avoid the waves that crashed onto his position. The mist was blown back with the force of a hurricane, the wind from the concussive blast shredding it to nothing. Something fell from the sky – bits and pieces of trees, bushes, and fruits raining down like some celestial joke of mana from the heavens.
Finding purchase back on the lake, Kakashi vaulted to where the chakra burst had originated. He knew the signature.
It was Naruto.
Landing back on the dirt for the first time in what had seemed like hours, and finding the rest of him team there as well, Kakashi came upon the strangest and most terrifying scene he had witnessed in years.
Zabuza and Naruto were facing each other off, but they barely resembled the human beings they had once been. Naruto was coated in blood from head to toe, multiple gashes on his head and a nose that had been caved in. Zabuza was almost completely fried, burns over every part of his skin, some even looking like they reached down to the bone. But the look on his face, the expression dug into every feature was the worst part.
It was absolute horror and reverence.
Zabuza went to say something but never got further than the first slurred syllable when needles pierced his neck. He went down.
A light-hearted giggle came from the treetops. "I think that's enough, Zabuza-san."
Kakashi gazed up at the voice's owner. It was a young child, a boy in his early teens by his size and timber of his voice. A mask covered his face, Kirigakure's hunter ranks if he was correct, but what bothered him was the faint sheen of blue that colored the boy's neck and shoulders. It seemed recent and out of place. The boy nodded.
"Thank you for your assistance in allowing me to apprehend Zabuza-san. But I felt it was appropriate to put him out of his misery before he got into any more trouble."
Kakashi shunshined to Zabuza's body and put his fingers to the neck, unsure of the boy's true intentions. The lack of pulse confirmed it – Zabuza was dead. But still… "You seem fairly intimate with Zabuza to refer to him as such."
The hunter-nin's head tilted. "Does one not always become familiar with the prey they are destined to kill?"
Kakashi nearly shivered at the purity in that voice. "By my guess, you're a hunter-nin from the land of Mist, correct?"
"Did the mask give it away? But yes, I am one of the shinobi ranks that make it our life and art to hunt down rogue ninja that try and escape from our laws."
Naruto mumbled something and stumbled towards Zabuza. Kakashi let out a small shout of worry and caught the boy before he fell to the ground. "My shubect," he wheezed, the broken nose making it hard to understand him. "Mine…all mine."
The hunter-nin shook his head. "I am sorry, but I cannot allow that. The secrets in this body are under the jurisdiction of Kiri. You are not allowed near him."
"Beh quiet, nyu fake nyin!" The hunter-nin recoiled as if slapped. Kakashi's concerns and suspicions grew stronger. "I wanted him! I marked him! Heshi mine! Nyo one elshes!" He slumped forward. "Nyo one…elshes…"
Not wanting to drag this out any longer and risk discovery, the boy transported to Zabuza's body and grabbed it. "That is still not possible. Your battle is over, and mine has just begun." His voice grew just the tiniest bit deeper. "I must dispose of the body." With a whirl of leaves, he and the body were gone.
"Kakashi-shenshei, nyu can't let them…"
"Shh…I understand. They'll come back, and when they do, we'll be ready."
Naruto grinned, blood dripping from his nose and mouth in rivulets, most of his front teeth missing including one of his trademark incisors. "The ekperimyent was a shushess…righ?"
"Yeah, it was."
"K…gonna go shleep nyow. Nyighty-nyight." He slumped into unconsciousness.
Kakashi sighed, letting out all the air he was holding in. Well, at least they were all alive, if not in perfect shape, and now-The air around him went wavy, and he felt his legs give out from underneath.
Oh crap.
He dropped Naruto and joined the boy. He had used too much of the Sharingan for too long, even though he never really finished that one huge jutsu. But the energy needed to copy, decipher, and attempt to employ all of Zabuza's techniques drained enough from him to reduce him to this state. He watched as Sakura, Sasuke, and Tazuna rushed to the both of them in a panic.
"Sorry 'bout this guys, but do you think you can carry us to Tazuna's house?"
Tazuna stood straight and grabbed the man underneath his arm. "Of course!" Sakura and Sasuke followed suit on Naruto.
Kakashi gave his U-smile. "Good, 'cause I'm gonna pass out now."
And so he did.
Haku went to remove the senbon from Zabuza's neck when the man grabbed the approaching hand. It trembled. "Zabuza-san?"
"That boy…that brat…he was more of demon than I-no…he was more like the devil…A demon-god that wants to consume the world…"
"Zabuza…san…?"
"Haku," Zabuza flinched as the electric burns made it hard for him to twist his head. "Watch out for that kid…Even more than Kakashi of the Sharingan, that kid…he…"
"I understand, Zabuza-san," Haku pushed the man's hand down. "Just rest. I will take care of it all."
Zabuza said nothing and rested his head back on the soft, moss-covered ground.
Haku's bottom lip bled. This would not stand. The person who did this to Zabuza-san would acknowledge the nature of his crimes.
Haku swore it.
A/N: And the promised techie-action-fight scene is here! I made it extra super special awesome and long, so I hope you enjoyed all of it! As you may have noticed, there was a bit of mood whiplash from the comedy to the action, but that was kinda intended. Perhaps you can figure out why. Also, to all those that thought Naruto would wipe the floor with Zabuza…you thought wrong! Naruto's inventions may be colossally destructive and powerful, but his actual physical traits are much lower than in canon as he's focused all his energy on the kinzoku jutsu. So don't expect feats of amazing strength and agility to go along with the chaotic terror that are his weapons.
But given Naruto's hyper regeneration and super stamina, courtesy of Kyuubi, he does last a little longer than someone of his stature should. In any case, watch out for the next chapter. There is a lot less action and a lot more planning and conniving as Naruto heals, and the comedy comes back to the forefront.
Also, people were wondering about the omakes. Yes, they are canon, but I felt that putting them directly in the story would break its flow, so I found it best to separate them. They're perfectly good as standalones, and I hope you enjoy them.
Oh, and as a side note – visit the Nin Tech forum! Why? Because I'm whiny and needy! ARGH!
Oh, and because Kyuu-chi says so. And she's queen…so do it.
Next Chapter – Of Inventions and Minions
New Jutsu
Maruchibakuhuu (Multi-Blaster) – A gun that can shoot various ammunition via electromagnetic projection (uses the Gauss coilgun as the base). This is one of the only weapons that Naruto keeps on his person rather than in a body seal or seal capsule.
Boruto Taihou (Volt Cannon) – A large gun that channels chakra straight from Naruto's body into a deadly beam of energy. A DEW (Directed-Energy Weapon; catch-all term for various beam weapons), its firing sequence is a two-stage process: a low-powered laser (which also doubles as a rangefinder) creates an ionized 'tunnel' down which the electrical discharge can travel to the target. The shot can be from a few millimeters to a couple feet in diameter and up to several miles in range depending on the chakra output Naruto feeds into it. Normally there is a limiter that prevents him from using it above 50% capacity as the power/energy usage multiplies exponentially.
Genso Bakudan (Element Bomb) – A type of bomb that stores elemental chakra inside of it. When released, it wrecks various effects upon the target depending on the element sealed inside (fire/water/earth/wind/lightning.)
Hiraishin (Lightning Rod) – A baton that conducts lightning jutsu. Normally used for smacking foes at close range and then electrocuting them (stun baton), it deals both bludgeoning and electric damage. It can also send out bolts of lightning from the rod to enemies. Naruto can switch on/off the electrical current with a simple signal.
Kuuki Ouisogi (Aerial Rush) – A backpack that has two modes – heli-mode and jet-mode. Heli-mode allows Naruto to hover much higher in the air than his hover board via propellers, while jet-mode allows quick bursts of speed via high-pressure fire jutsu and maneuvering via foldable wings.
Omake!
Bullet Dodge
When Meizu and Gouzu arrived back in Wave, they immediately zoomed back to Gatou's hideouts. After dealing with a few haughty mercenaries, who thought that since the demon brothers had failed they were now ripe for the picking, the two made their way to Zabuza's quarters. Honestly, even if they were missing their signature gauntlets, they were still Kiri chunin and could easily deal with some low-class brainless brigands.
The only ones they really worried about was that group of Konoha nins, especially that wacky blonde. But if their boss was the next one to face them, they wouldn't stand a chance.
Especially that wacky blonde.
So it was with great hope and fearful shame that they marched into Zabuza's room, and stopped short, eyes wide in shock.
Zabuza's body was entirely wrapped in bandages, not an inch of skin showing, Haku was busy smearing a salve on him, the self-proclaimed tool doing the most possible to make sure Zabuza was healing quickly.
Upon hearing the two enter, Haku turned to greet them. "So, you are back, then?"
Meizu and Gouzu shivered at those obsidian orbs. "Yes," Meizu replied. "We weren't able to kill the target on his way here."
"Underestimated them and lost the advantage of surprise," Gouzu added.
"Was it the blond brat?" Zabuza's cracked voice said. The two only nodded. "Heh. So…he put his sights on you as well…" His sentence withered into a pained grunt and the man went stiff as the bandages torturously rubbed against his charred flesh.
"Zabuza-san! Please! Stay still! The medicine should numb your pain and quicken the healing of your skin," Haku said, holding the larger man down gently. Soon, Zabuza's pained grunts tapered off as he fell asleep.
Meizu and Gouzu glanced at each other. Maybe it was a good thing that the boy had not taken them seriously after all.
Paperwork Powers, Go!
Sarutobi rubbed his head. Naruto had caused massive collateral damage during one of his basic D-missions again. This time he was so sure that the mission was benign – all they had to do was fix up a basic tool shed.
Naruto had turned it into an armored tank that shot the tools at a speed that pierced solid wood.
Whatever was he going to do with that boy? He sighed. Ah well, he supposed he could grant him some leeway. After all…
He grinned cheekily and removed the sheet from his most favorite item in the world – Paper-kun! It was a birthday present Naruto had given him the year before and made all his work so much easier and simpler. All it took was the push of a button and voila! An entire day's worth of forms done in a matter of seconds.
Of course, it did require a special room, but if all it took were a few layers of reinforced concrete, Sarutobi could dip into his own savings and pay for it.
Grabbing the stack of paperwork from that morning, he inserted it into the feeder. After making sure that it was placed properly, he turned the machine on, selected the purpose of the stack – proposals levied by the elder council (bunch of backstabbing fogies that they were) – and walked out of the room.
Sealing the great steel door shut, he locked it and then pushed the large red button on the wall.
A thickly accented and deep voice came from within. "Paper-kun will now begin processing. Hasta la vista, paper-baby." A whining and whirring. Multiple thumps in succession like a steroid-induced woodpecker came after. Sarutobi watched as something tried to puncture outward through the two-inch stainless steel but failed to make it.
"Paper has been assimilated. Ha. Ha ha. Ha."
Sarutobi opened the door. The wall was littered by papers, each jutting into the concrete like it had been made of wet clay. So maybe there was the side-effect of Paper-kun trying to kill anything in the vicinity in the process, but at least he got the work done. See? Approval over there, mostly denial everywhere else.
Quick and clean.
Sarutobi chewed on his pipe while humming a raunchy ninja song as he collected the paperwork. All done! Now, what would he do with the rest of the morning…He smiled.
Perhaps Nami-chan would like a visit? The orangeness called for him.
