For a friend's birthday. This is the edited version, 'cause… I don't think I'm going to post anymore smut on ff. There's going to be a link for the uncensored version on my profile, though. … I actually have a pretty detailed headcanon for domestic!McSpirk. Please don't judge me too harshly… Also... McCoy's name and title are WAY TOO DAMN LONG TOGETHER.

WARNING: Contains a threesome relationship.

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek. It is (C) Gene Roddenberry.

Kirk, Spock and a Doc

The end of their five-year mission had been both welcomed and dreaded. Sure, they would finally stop having to worry about all of the crazy shit they'd had to deal with during that time. On the other hand, it was all of that crazy shit that had managed to bring them all so close together.

Without that long mission, Captain James T. Kirk probably never would have met his best friends, and eventual lovers, Commander Spock and Chief Medical Officer Doctor Leonard H. McCoy.

Without them, Kirk mused, he probably never would've survived his first month of captaincy.

He curled up at the end of the couch, the armrest pressing his knees to his chest. He held a data PADD in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. His too-blue eyes stared at the PADD's screen, looking but not seeing as his mind continued to wander.

McCoy had been leaning in the kitchen doorway for a good five minutes; his blonde lover had yet to notice him. He frowned minutely, wondering what the younger man was so engrossed in.

He spared a quick glance back as he felt a warm hand briefly touch his shoulder.

"You are scowling." Spock's smooth voice murmured.

"I'm not scowling."

Warm lips pressed a kiss to the back of McCoy's neck. "Very well then. Why are you not-scowling?"

"Jim's got 'The Look'." McCoy nodded towards the couch.

"Based on your tone, I assume it is not his 'I am horny' look?" Spock's arms snaked around the doctor's waist.

"If you'd stop neckin' me and look, you'd see what the hell I'm talking about."

Spock sighed; it was barely noticeable, but McCoy knew a Vulcan sigh when he heard one.

"... Ah. 'The Look'."

"Exactly." McCoy frowned in distaste.

'The Look' the two men were referring to was the expression Kirk wore when he was deep in thought, usually self-deprecating. The first time they'd become aware of 'The Look' was not long after they'd started their relationship. It was the first of many times that Kirk would doubt the validity of said relationship based on what he thought were his inadequacies.

"What d'you reckon's going on in our guy's mind this time?"

"I regretfully inform you that I do not know. However, we shall ask him." Suddenly, Spock was walking into the living room, pulling McCoy along by his hand.

They sunk onto the couch, eliciting a start from their lover.

"Oh. I didn't hear you guys." Kirk offered them an easy smile.

"That is because you were... off in space?" Spock inclined his head.

"Basically. Sorry, I'm just tired." The blonde set aside the PADD and glass, turning to snuggle up against the Vulcan.

"Bullshit. You were thinkin' about somethin' pretty damn hard, Jim." McCoy snorted harshly as his hand reached over to gently brush against Kirk's cheek.

"Relax, Bones. I promise I wasn't coming up with reasons why you two shouldn't wanna be with me."

Spock put his free arm around Kirk. "Would you care to... spill the beans, then?"

"I guess I kinda miss the mission."

Two pairs of dark eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Jim... that mission ended exactly seven months, one week, and four days ago."

"I know."

"And we are set to be on planet side for at least another year."

"I know."

"And most of the crew has moved on to other missions."

Kirk's tone saddened. "... I know."

McCoy and Spock exchanged a quick glance.

"Do you... miss them?"

The blonde shrugged, snuggling closer to Spock. "I guess I do. We had a nice dysfunctional family thing going on."

McCoy snorted. "What the hell d'you call what we got now? We couldn't be more dysfunctionally domestic, Jim."

"I still miss 'em." Kirk shrugged.

McCoy's hand carded comfortingly through the blonde's hair. Spock's own hand joined in.

"Perhaps the captain is in need of something to remind him of the mission?" the Vulcan mused softly.

"Really. And what did your pointy-eared self have in mind?" McCoy couldn't help but grin.

"Our shore leave at Star Base Seven comes to mind."

Kirk sat back at that. His eyes widened a fraction as he remembered exactly which shore leave Spock was talking about.

"Huh. And I thought you wanted to keep things strictly vanilla." McCoy's hand slipped in between the Vulcan's legs, brushing against his groin.

Spock's breath hitched, barely. "Pon Farr is not the only time a Vulcan may enjoy non-"vanilla" carnal relations, Doctor."

"I guess that's true." McCoy glanced over at Kirk, who was being uncharacteristically quiet. Spock looked at him as well.

"Jim?"

"You really wanna do that? Now?"

"What the hell is wrong with now?" the doctor demanded.

"I-I dunno. I was trying to get some, y'know, paperwork done. And... isn't it almost dinner time?" Kirk frowned.

"... Jim. Are you feeling alright?" Spock sounded genuinely concerned.

McCoy laughed, "Calm down, hobgoblin. We just haven't had that kinda sex since we were away. Of course our guy's gonna be a little scared."

"I am not scared." Kirk scowled.

"Prove it."

No sooner had the words left McCoy's lips than Kirk had leapt up off of the couch and ran off to the bedroom. "You'd think after so long, he'd be immune to my goading..."

Spock quirked an amused brow. "Indeed."

There was a lot of rustling noises coming from the bedroom, followed by a sound 'thump'.

"Jim? Doin' okay in there?"

"'m fine! It's these goddamn pants..."

"Certainly you will not be able to fit into them any longer, Captain. The domestic lifestyle has not been easy on your waist line." Spock stated innocently.

Silence.

Then: "Oh, fuck you, Spock."

"I believe we agreed that it would be the other way around."

"I'm not fat! I just fell when I tried to put the pants on!"

McCoy snorted softly. He reached a hand up and began gently massaging the tip of Spock's ear. The Vulcan gave a deep, appreciative groan.

"Hey, don't start without me!"

"Just hurry the hell up and we won't have to." McCoy groused.

Kirk finally appeared in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. "For a guy who's about to get amazing sex, you're insanely grumpy."

McCoy and Spock looked him up and down approvingly. Moving as one, they stood, beckoning him over to them.

He stood in front of them, clearly trying to suppress his eagerness.

"You sure you're ready, Jim?"

"Of course I am, Bones."

"James." Spock scolded, "You will address Leonard as 'Doctor' or 'Sir' for the duration of the evening. And I will accept 'Professor', 'Commander', or 'Sir'. Do you understand?"

Kirk's hands played idly with the shirt hem of his red cadet's uniform.. "Yes... sir."

"Good boy." McCoy murmured, closing the distance between them. He swooped down, claiming Kirk's lips in a fiery kiss. A soft growl formed in the back of his throat at the sound of the younger man's whimper.

Spock stepped up behind the blonde, pulling his form flush against his own. His hands slipped beneath the uniform shirt, warming the cool skin as he refamiliarized himself with said flesh.

"Your recent performance has been severely lacking in effort, Cadet. Why do you insist on day-dreaming when you have work to do?" His hot breath tickled Kirk's ear.

Kirk groaned in response, grinding his hips.

Instantly, McCoy's hands were on those hips, holding them still. His eyes flew open as he felt Kirk smirking into their kiss and, unceremoniously, he broke apart from Kirk's lips.

Two pairs of dark eyes met over the youngest man's shoulder.

"I don't believe our guy wants to behave tonight, Spock."

-…-

McCoy lay on his side, snaking an arm around the captain's waist. The youngest man rolled onto his own side so that McCoy was spooning up behind him. He tugged at Spock until the Vulcan scooted over to allow Kirk to pillow his head on his chest.

McCoy's hand reached up to rest on Spock's chest, joined by Kirk's. Spock lay his hand on top of theirs, closing his eyes.

"Do you still miss the mission?"

"Not so much now. I'd forgotten what it was like to have kickass sex without worrying about an alarm going off at any moment." Kirk smiled tiredly.

McCoy snorted, kissing his hair, "Shut up and go to sleep, Captain."

As his mind slowly drifted off, Kirk vaguely wondered what he'd done to deserve such an amazing life.