In this chapter we head back to Fairchester. This time, instead of introducing one new character (such as Elizaveta the fawn), I introduce two! Ohoho, which two magical creatures will it be this time?
Disclaimer: The plot and setting is mine, the characters are not.
Oh yes, and beware of sexual innuedo in this chapter. Lots of it.
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"There's something about a man in a toga…" Francis began, eyeing Arthur.
"Put a sock in it, wineface." He growled back, trying to hide his blush. Arthur had never thought much about his Fairy King uniform – a short white toga with a bejeweled clasp, top-quality leather sandals, and of course his crown – but now that Francis has seen him in it, he suddenly thought that it showed far too much skin.
Francis didn't seem to notice his unease and examined his own toga. It was simpler and made of a rougher material. His sandals looked worn and smelled like sweaty feet. "But these clothes are so uncool. You need something with more style."
"Y-you're just too flashy!" Arthur retorted.
"Merci," Francis grinned. "Now, shouldn't we prepare for our journey?"
Sighing, Arthur lead him back outside to the stables, ignoring Francis' comments and suggestions on how to make the togas more stylish.
When they arrived outside the centaurs and Elizaveta were all ready. They wore steel armor on their chests and had their helmets under their arms. Each carried a pack with provisions and a large spear slung over their shoulders. Roderich was there, too, chatting with Elizaveta. They straightened their backs and saluted when Arthur came into their midst.
"We are ready for the journey, your majesty." Elizaveta told him once he approached her.
"The general and I were just discussing battle plans, sir." Roderich said, his blush giving him away. Elizaveta giggled.
"Good, good." Arthur inspected them. "As am I. Oh, and this guy is, too." He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder to Francis.
"They look like they're ready for battle!" Francis said, eyeing the soldiers. "Maybe I should have some armor too?"
"None of the armor would fit you. They were made for centaurs and fawns." Arthur replied.
"What about you? Don't you have a spare one for yourself?" Francis asked.
At this Arthur smiled and pulled something out from the depths of his toga. "I don't need armor. I have my weapon and shield right here." He waved his magic wand at him.
Francis gaped at it. "You have magic powers?"
"Of course! I'm the fairy king!" Arthur stowed his wand away safely and turned to a centaur. "Bring out my glorious steed!"
The centaur bowed and disappeared into the stables. "Glorious steed?" Francis repeated. "Don't you mean your horse?"
"Don't be daft. Why would there be horses here?" Arthur scoffed. "Ah, there he is now."
The centaur had returned with a unicorn in a tow. From what Francis could see, its coat was a bright white and its mane glossy black. Arthur gave it an affectionate hug and spoke to it. "Are you up for a long journey, Kiku?"
"Kiku?!" Francis exclaimed. "His name is Kiku?" He rushed to Arthur's side and saw that, from close up, the unicorn did resemble the Japanese man. His hair was black and cropped, unlike the unicorns he saw on the field, and his eyes a dark brown. The white shade of his coat matched the other nation's naval uniform perfectly. He even wore the same calm expression that Japan usually had on.
"He's the younger brother of the oldest unicorn in the kingdom. Yao, I think his name was." Arthur told him, stroking the unicorn's hair. He didn't notice Kiku frown when his older brother's name came up.
"And he talks like the rest of them?" Francis asked.
"Of course he does! This is a magical land, after all." Arthur nudged the unicorn. "Greet the idiot, Kiku."
Kiku the unicorn bowed his head at Francis. "Hello, Francis-san." He spoke in a polite manner and used honorifics, just like the Kiku back home did. Francis nodded in reply, stunned.
Arthur looked up at the sky. "The sun's nearly at the top of the sky. We should head out." He grabbed hold of the back of Kiku's long neck and hoisted himself up.
"What are you doing?" Francis asked as Arthur settled himself on Kiku's back.
"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm getting ready for the journey."
The light bulb of all things dirty went off in Francis' head. He smiled devilishly at Arthur and asked, "So you mean that you're riding Kiku?"
"Of course I'm riding him. I always ride him." Arthur said.
Francis bit back a laugh. "And do you enjoy riding him?"
"Yes," Arthur replied, completely oblivious to what he was implying. "He's gentle but fast when I need him to be, and it's always a smooth ride." Francis was now fighting gales of laughter trying to escape from his mouth. This was just too good.
In between snickers he managed to ask one more question. "Could I, possibly, touch his horn, sil'vous plait?"
Arthur checked the sky again. They were wasting daylight. "No, you cannot! He doesn't like his horn being touched by anyone but me. Now stop asking questions, we're wasting valuable time! And get up off the ground, what's so funny?" He asked, for Francis was rolling around on the ground, laughing so hard that he couldn't reply. Kiku blushed and shook his head at Arthur's obliviousness.
"Your majesty, does your friend need a unicorn as well?" Roderich asked, eyeing the laughing Frenchman curiously.
Francis composed himself and got up, a few giggles still leaving his mouth. "Yeah, Arthur, don't I get a unicorn too?"
"I don't think there are any more unicorns left for him to use." Arthur told the centaur.
"Perhaps he could use the Prince's unicorn, Charlie?" Roderich suggested but Arthur shook his head.
"No, Charlie isn't friendly to new riders. He only likes Peter." Arthur said. "And he can't possibly ride with me."
Elizaveta joined in the conversation. "We could always have one of the guards carry him."
Francis liked this idea very much. "Oh yes!" he said. "I could ride on one of them! Like this handsome fellow over here." He patted a centaur's back and smiled hopefully at Arthur.
"Oh, no," Elizaveta laughed. "I don't think Ludwig would like that."
Francis froze, his hand hovering mid-pat. "L-Ludwig?" Slowly, he raised his head and looked at the centaur. A serious and slightly frightening face stared back at him. The centaur, Ludwig, had blue eyes and slicked back blond hair, much like the German. He was also just as muscular and gave Francis the same angry look.
"AHH! I'm sorry!" Francis leapt away from Ludwig, frightened. "I won't touch you! Please don't invade me!"
Ludwig looked at him, his expression switching to confused. "Invade?"
"Ignore him." Arthur told him. "He's just had some bad experiences involving invasion and wurst."
Confused, Ludwig turned to Francis and told him, "I'm not going to invade you."
"Ludwig's our toughest soldier." Elizaveta explained. "He has a knack for dealing with troublemakers and follows every military rule out there. But he's really a nice guy."
Francis looked at him. "So, can I ride you?"
The look of confusion switched back to anger. "No. Fairchester Military rule number twenty-two states that no soldier is to carry another unless he or she is wounded in battle, as it can prove to be a drawback if a surprise attack were to occur."
"This one has a stick up his ass too." Francis muttered.
Watching the centaur reprimand Francis, a sudden bit of inspiration struck Arthur. "Ludwig, I hereby give you the task of training Francis here on becoming a soldier of the Kingdom of Fairchester."
"T-Training to become a soldier!" Francis exclaimed.
"Explain the rules to him and give him some training exercises whenever you can. I'm sure that given your experience you can do that even while traveling. Oh, and don't forget to punish him when necessary."
Francis turned to Arthur, eyes wide. "Exercises? Training? PUNISHMENT?!"
Nodding, Arthur simply said, "It'll be good for you. Maybe then you'll actually be able to help and fight instead of losing your battles."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Francis asked, offended.
"It means that you suck at fighting." Arthur replied.
"Well sorry that I don't have the advantage of horrible cooking." Francis snapped back. "One taste of your so called 'food' and the Evil Warlock will run away screaming in terror."
Arthur glared at him. "Git."
"Stupide."
"Perverted wanker."
"Look who's talking!"
"Don't you bloody start with –"
A loud bang cut him off. Ludwig had slammed his spear down on a nearby cart. "STOP! We're getting no where with this. I thought we had a rescue mission to achieve? This is not helping Prince Peter."
Arthur and Francis cleared their throats, ashamed of themselves. "You're quite right, Ludwig. This isn't helping." Arthur straightened his crown and looked at his small troop.
"Gentlemen, prepare yourselves! Say your goodbyes and let's head on out." Arthur guided Kiku away and held his wand out in front of him. "Onwards, to the Evil Warlock's castle!"
[End Chapter 8]
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There is only one reason I decided to make Japan a unicorn: so England can ride him. That's right, I said it. My friend christened him the "Japanicorn".
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