Shiori: Woah! I was surprised that this story got quite a few reviews so quickly. *secretly cries with joy* I hope that I can keep updating this at a decent-if irregular-pace. Also, I have a question for the readers: Should I keep this in a list form or add a small piece to each mistake with some of the characters' reactions?
On another similar note, I want to thank Peltra, Mikayasha, Pu7o, kaitouneko, and Malizia for reviewing as well as telling me about other mistakes (Mikayasha), an explanation about (X)CHKS, a list of episodes with bad subs (both from Pu7o), and overall encouragement. Also, thanks to those of you who read, favorited, and/or followed this story.
Conan: Get to the story, already!
Shiori: Don't make me tell Ran about the time you threw a fit because Japan lost the World Cup!
Conan: ...
Disclaimer: If I owned Detective Conan, then it would have been written in English for obvious reasons. I clearly don't own the subs! I also mean no offense to the subbers or any crossdressers.

You know you're watching Detective Conan with terrible subtitles when:
1. The timing of the subtitles is so bad that Ran seems to be saying what her father said. That could lead to some interesting situations...
2. Third rate detectives suddenly become third graders without the "detective-like" Black Organization interfering.
3. A novel has been out-of-print 800 years ago.
4. Shinichi isn't a deduction geek. He's a deduction fly. Who knew insects could solve mysteries?
5. Haigen and Gentai have teamed up to begin their reign of terror against the "Characters of the Day," such as replacing Shinmei Kaori with Shinmyou Kaori.
6. Kogoro knows what a famous author's favorite line is but never finishes his own line to say what it is.
7. Periods, question marks, and other punctuation marks are being conserved due to a grammar drought.
8. Evrybody speeks n chatspeek, bcause da subtitlers r 2 lazy 2 rite it out. (Thanks for the tip, Mikayasha.)
9. A publishing office seems to have forgotten about Daylight Savings Time, because it receives a fax at 1 AM while midnight is shown in military time on the screen.
10. "A Honey Cocktail Murder Case" has been changed to "Case of the Bee-Chicken-Tail." It appears that the bug concoction wasn't the only freaky potion they were creating...
11. Kogoro calls the owner of the Bee-Chicken-Tail mansion a man even though he called her/him/it pretty earlier on.
12. And he's not the only one. Nobody thinks twice about a cross-dressing company owner as long as they don't have to drink his/her/its literal bug juice. (Not that anybody can agree about which gender to refer to him/her/the creature as.)
13. Haigen and Gentai strike again! Hachimaki is now Honmaki, but somebody seems to have caught on and wrote, "Honmaki(?)" in the subtitles. However, the clones won't go down without a fight, so they made sure that proofreading was eliminated from the editing process.
14. Oh, wait! They even changed his given name from "Hachibee" (pronounced similarly to "Ha chi beh eh") to "Haemon" in retaliation!
15. The clones are having fun with this lone episode (120 in the subs). "Aihara" was replaced by "Aibara." Maybe they forced another odd potion down Haibara's throat to change her into a middle-aged man and changed her last name!
16. Shinichi, the deduction fly, was turned into Edogawa Konan in a game center, because "game center" now means "amusement park."
17. It's bad to have "such good food in the afternoon."
18. "Closed door cases" are just as difficult as sealed room cases. Clearly, opening closed doors is impossible.
19. The mansion owner was attacked by bees when he/she/it was "primary six." Math teachers lied when they said that six was not a primary number!
20. Helium now means "oxygen," so we should all use helium tanks while scuba diving.