Always Wrong 3: Feather Duster


Man, no matter how many times she traveled, the vastness of planet Earth always amazed her. What was more, there always seemed to be so much uninhabited space. Over six billion people and still room to move around. Guess that's a good thing when there were so many destructive fights, but more often than not it was simply a good excuse to use the planet as a fighting ring.

Bulma parked her car out in the middle of the desert, pulling her hair up into a French twist before she shut off the air conditioner. The next dragon ball was still probably about a day away, so this place was just as good as any to call it a night. At least there wouldn't be anybody to bother her.

"What a depressing sight," she thought aloud to herself as she took out her house hoi poi and looked around. Nothing but rocks and dirt. No vegetation, no water, and no animals. It had to be probably one of the loneliest places on Earth, she figured. "Probably a perfect place for Piccolo!" she laughed, thinking about the solitary creature that filled his existence with meditation.

A few miles away, the green alien grimaced, his arms crossed in front of his chest as he floated out of sight. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"All right then," she exclaimed as she clicked the top of the hoi poi and tossed it in front of her. "Time for some R and R!" She grabbed a shoulder that had gone stiff during the long drive in one hand as she made her way into the modest capsule house. A nice long bath should set things straight.


Piccolo landed close to the house as the sun began to set, casting a rose hue over the white brick. He could hear her humming inside and water running as her bare feet softly padded along the floor. He could imagine her movements as she went about her daily ritual, completely oblivious to his presence outside. She opened a drawer and pulled out some fabric. No doubt she was in her room pulling out the clothes that she would sleep in. She walked further into the house to where the water was running and he heard more fabric rustle. He could hear the material of her jeans as she pushed it over her hips, jiggling her lush thighs slightly before the pants hit the ground in a heap. Next was her top, her head shaking her hair free as she lifted it over her. She sat on the edge of the bathtub as she unclasped another garment that he couldn't identify, and slowly eased her way into the water. He could almost see the water gently creep over her skin, and couldn't help but wonder how warm the water was against what he imagined was soft, supple skin, but he could tell by the way she sighed that it felt good against her body.

He stiffened. That was enough. Why was he even thinking about that anyway? Right now the only thing that he needed to worry about was any ulterior motives that she had with the dragon balls. He turned and walked towards her car and looked inside. She had left a bag in the back seat. She had probably figured she was safe from bandits out in a place like this; another example of her foolishness. He had easily followed her, so there was no doubt that someone else could have the same opportunity if he wasn't there. He picked up the bag and rustled through it, but there was nothing interesting in it; just a wallet, a mirror, and several other small, useless items. At least she had enough sense to take the dragon ball inside with her.


"Mmm, much better!" Bulma yawned as she stretched her arms above her head, one towel wrapped securely around her body and another turbaned over her hair. Her skin felt so silky after soaking in the tub, and was still pink from the heat of the water.

She made her way to her bedroom as she ruffled her hair with the towel, wringing the excess water out before carelessly tossing the bklue curls over her shoulder. She had laid an old tank top and silk shorts on the bed and hummed to herself as she began to pull the lower towel off.

As she gripped the edges of the towel she stopped humming, frowning as she looked out the window. It was strange, there was no way anybody could be out there, but she had the weirdest feeling that she wasn't alone. Get a grip, Bulma. She clenched her teeth and reached over, shutting the blinds. She wasn't usually so paranoid. Just as the blinds fell to the sill she heard a loud 'clack!' on the surface of the window. She shrieked and fell backwards, clutching the towel tightly across her chest as stared at the window, waiting for the worst to happen. Maybe she had been right, there was someone there! Oh no, what if it was a bandit that had followed her and was now going to take advantage of her vulnerable body? With a trembling hand she reached into the drawer of the bedside table and pulled out a gun, squeezing her finger on the trigger just hard enough to make her feel a little safer. Weapon ready, she stepped forward and in one deft movement pulled the blinds up again, shoving the gun in the direction of the window.

Big innocent eyes stared at her from a ball of fluff, a small beak protruding from the circular body. It tapped the window again with its beak and Bulma exhaled, dropping her gun and collapsing on the bed. Just an animal. How boring. But was she actually hoping for something bad to happen? She felt ashamed. Even if it did bring excitement to her life, feeling excited about something like that was just sick. Bulma put her gun back up and walked over to the window and opened it, letting the light shine on the creature.

"Wow, you're really cute," she grinned. She extended a hand towards the animal to see if it would bite, but when it just stared at her fingertips she giggled, picking it up and setting it down on the bed. "You really shouldn't sneak up on a girl like that, but I guess you were just looking for some food." She tilted her head at him as she finished putting her pajamas on. "Man, what are you, anyway?"

It stared at her unblinking in response.

"Hm. Well, let's see what you eat." She picked it up and carried it to the kitchen, making idle conversation while she walked. "You know, my dad would absolutely love you. He has this really weird thing for animals. Maybe I'll take you back with me; he's got plenty of different habitats—I'm sure we could find one that suits you."

She set him down on the kitchen table before turning to rummage through the refrigerator. "Okay, first things first," She began as she filled her hands with a few products. "Carnivore or omnivore?" She placed the plastic containers on the table, removing the lids to various meats and vegetables. She knew the creature probably couldn't understand her, let alone answer her, but she felt comfortable with something to talk to. At least it wasn't telling her to shut up, like Vegeta had so many times before.

The animal bounced towards the containers, using what to propel it Bulma had no clue, and stared at the buffet before it. The fact that it never blinked creeped Bulma out a bit, but she shrugged it off. She had seen weirder.

It looked at the containers, and then looked back at Bulma. After a moment, it made the cutest peeping noise she had ever heard.

"Peep?" she echoed. "What does that mean? You don't like any of these? Well…. What else do I have?" she asked herself as she turned and laid a finger against her lips as she thought. "Okay, well you look like some kind of bird, so maybe nuts!"

As she opened the cabinet door she felt a sharp pain on her palm. She hissed as she withdrew it quickly, bringing it up to her face to inspect the blood that began to percolate from the wound. "A splinter? What the fuck!" Bulma growled and winced at the same time as she brought her hand o her mouth, fishing for the stray shard of wood embedded in her flesh with her teeth.

Behind her she heard the creature purr and coo. Turning, she could see its eyes begin to bulge as its feathers ruffled.

"Hey, what's wrong little guy?" She reached out to it with her good hand, but it leapt towards her, spreading wings she didn't realize it had that seemed to grow longer by the minute. Was it just her, or was its beak growing too? It began to hover over her injured hand.


Did the woman never stop talking? She would probably strike up a conversation with a wall if left alone long enough. Piccolo's brow furrowed as he concentrated on meditating to no avail. He sighed and focused again, drowning out his surroundings. His mind began to drift away when a scream brought his attention back to reality.

It was Bulma. He shot up and ran to the house; something was growling and throwing furniture around. He stormed through the door and flew across the living room, catching the refrigerator before it landed on the woman's cowering figure. She looked up in surprise when she realized she hadn't been flattened.

"Piccolo? What the fu—!" Her cry was cut off by a howling screech across the room. Piccolo tossed the fridge to the side and glared at the source of the noise. A large creature took up most of the space in the kitchen, it's half-serpent, half-birdlike form curling around as it brought its tail forward to lash out at them. Piccolo grabbed the tail when it struck him and squeezed, his muscles bulging as he attempted to rip the creature in half.

"Bulma, get out of here!" he snapped. She nodded fervently and crawled away, picking herself up to run only when she was out of range of the two. The creature lunged forward, his beak open and ready for the kill, but he was a slow opponent. Piccolo twisted his body so that the tail was the only thing that the snakebird bit into. After tasting its own green blood it let go, its mouth stretching open in a chilling human-like scream. Piccolo rammed his elbow into the side of the monster's face, silencing him. The creature slumped onto the floor unconscious.

Piccolo looked around saw through the open doorway Bulma peeking out from behind her car. When she was certain that the beast posed no more threat she ran into her house, her expression confused and slightly angry.

"What the hell are you doing here? Didn't I just see you at Korin's?" Her eyebrows rose as she came to the conclusion, "Did you follow me?"

"You're welcome," he muttered as he walked past her and exited the house. He was a little pissed at her lack of gratitude, but hadn't really expected it. Her reaction at his presence taking precedence over her emotions made absolute sense. He planned on resuming his meditation, but Bulma had other ideas. Wanting answers, she followed him out, arms crossed firmly over her chest.

"Why are you following me, Piccolo?" she asked. "Afraid I can't handle myself?"

Piccolo smirked, his eyes closed as he crossed his legs. "Yes, you were doing so well."

Bulma pouted, growling slightly. She knew she had lost, and she was really happy that he had happened to be there. She turned and stuck her nose in the air. "Well… thank you."

"Apology accepted."

Bulma ruffled and turned back to him. Apology? Why that smug little son of a bitch! "What? Why should I apologize? I'm not the one stalking people!"

"You should get some sleep."

"Hey! Don't try to change the subject," she shook a finger at him. "I never asked for your help."

Piccolo frowned and opened his eyes, giving Bulma a penetrating look. "Why are you looking for the dragon balls, Bulma?"

Bulma inwardly drew back. She had never really heard him say her name before, so it sounded kind of strange to hear it in his voice. "That's… none of your business," she said in a quiet voice that was almost a stage whisper.

"You may as well tell me, because I plan on finding out one way or another, even if it means following you until you summon Shenron." He closed his eyes again like he was ending the argument.

Piccolo may have meant it as a threat, but Bulma was considering that having Piccolo around a good asset. It would definitely be a little weird, being alone with him, but then again she doubt that she would even know he was there half the time; especially if he planned to keep hiding like he had been earlier.

She shrugged and began walking back to the house, but stopped in the doorway. "So, then, do you want to come inside?"

"I'm fine."

Bulma rolled her eyes and then looked back inside. She turned towards him again. "Um, then can you at least take the dead bird out of the kitchen?"


Next Chapter: Female Namekians and Alien Anatomy

Because this discussion has to happen eventually.

Sooooorry for the long wait, but I've been in and out of the hospital, and I'm still a little drugged up on pain killers. I broke my arm after the strap on my sky high stilettos broke (which will now be the third break for the same arm, so they put metal plates on it), and it's difficult (ie a pain in the ASS) to type with one hand. I know; excuses, excuses. Also, sorry these chapters are short! It's building up. There's a lot that's going to happen in a little while, I'm just trying to decide how I'm going to introduce it.