Disclaimer: Still don't own anything.

Author's notes: Oh my gosh you guys, your reviews are so kind! I'm overwhelmed by the number of you who have told me that I seem to have Santana and Finn spot on. I received the sweetest comment ever the other day and it made me cry. Nice things make me cry. R&R please!


Santana got as far as two blocks away from the school before she had to pull her car over to the side of the road so she could cry. Considering that they weren't even together, Finn Hudson was already doing a pretty good job of breaking her heart and making her cry. Pressing her forehead to the steering wheel, Santana clutched it like her life depended on it. Just thinking about how his lips had felt on hers made them start to tingle all over again like he was still kissing her. And he was right. In the split second they had made eye contact, she had wanted to run up to him and throw her arms around him and just kiss him. And she had been so close to doing it, but then her logic had kicked in and she had looked away and ran out of the auditorium like a bat out of hell. And yet somehow, Finn had still caught up to her and caught her off guard.

Why was she doing this to herself? Finn's words were playing like a broken record in her head. I do want to get to know you. No one had ever wanted to get to know her before, certainly not someone like Finn. Guys who wanted to get to know her didn't really want to get to know her. They just wanted to get to know her vagina. Which was fine, it wasn't like Santana had ever marketed herself as prime girlfriend material, but Santana didn't know how to handle a guy who seemed genuinely interested in her. And when Santana didn't know how to deal with something, she pushed it away. Far away. As far as she possibly could. So that she didn't have to deal with it. No matter how much pain it caused her. And Santana had absolutely no clue how to deal with a boy who supposedly wasn't going to give up easily. Why couldn't Finn be like every other guy? Why couldn't he just get fed up of her and leave her be? Why did he want to make her put down walls she had spent years putting up.

The worst part was that Santana knew he was serious. Until she caved in, he wasn't going to stop. They were a lot alike that way. When they wanted something badly enough, they would go above and beyond reason to make sure that they got it. But Santana didn't even know what she wanted anymore. How had Finn Hudson, of all people, managed to fuck her up so badly? She wasn't even supposed to be considering dating him, let alone thinking of caving. If he wasn't so damned sincere, it would be really easy for her to just forget about him. But unfortunately, Finn had this strange effect over her. Everything he said just...got to her. Quinn was a real idiot for cheating on him with Puck, and Rachel was an even bigger idiot for taking in Quinn and screwing up her shot with him.

Now, Santana was the one with a shot, and she was going to let it pass her by. "God, why am I so stupid?" she wondered, wiping at her eyes. She knew that if she could just get over herself, she could probably be really happy. Finn could make her happy. But the thought of being happy scared her. Santana hadn't been truly happy in quite some time. She had existed, and she had moments where she felt joyous, but those moments only existed when she was being a petty bitch and giving someone a slushie facial or making their life a complete hell. Santana lived for making the lives of girls like Rachel Berry a nightmare. She was a mean girl, a Regina George, but she just didn't know how else to act. She'd been a bitch for six years already. It was hard to break an old habit like that. But the part that truly scared Santana was that for Finn, she was willing to try. No, she wasn't going to change who she was completely, but for Finn, she was willing to let go. It was just her hear that was holding her back. Opening yourself up to someone meant leaving them an opportunity to hurt you, and Santana didn't want to be hurt. She couldn't handle it.

Even if Finn probably couldn't hurt a fly.

Groaning as it started raining, Santana felt like she was caught in some kind of stupid teen romance movie. The kind that she usually made Finn watch but complained about the whole time, so he wouldn't realize that she was actually kind of enjoying it. That made her seem average, and Santana was anything but average. She'd never been average. Her dad was a business man and she was lucky if he was actually home for longer than a few days at a time. She was pretty sure that he'd been cheating on her mom for years now. The only person she really cared about was her mother. Santana had always promised herself that she'd be strong for her mother, that she wouldn't cause her any more problems. She had an older sister who had abandoned ship the second she got the chance, leaving Lima for college in California and she had married some aspiring actor. The family hadn't heard from her in two years. Santana had grown up incredibly lonely and she was used to living that way. Even when she was with Brittany, she felt alone sometimes. Brittany didn't really understand her. Brittany barely even remembered her own name most days. As much as Santana loved her, it was pure folly to think that her best friend could actually understand the emotional depth of Santana's problems. No one knew about them. Santana had never cared to let anyone in.

Sighing, Santana reminded herself that it was lonely at the top. This was the path she'd chosen. She'd chosen status over likeability. She couldn't have both. She couldn't have Finn Hudson. Taking a moment to wipe her eyes and pull herself together, Santana put her car into drive and drove the short distance to her house, happy that her mother wasn't home yet. She didn't want to have to explain to her mom that she'd gotten into a sort-of fight with Finn. She hadn't stopped asking about him since he had come over and Santana really didn't want to explain that she was fucking up her chance before she'd even gotten it. Opening her door, Santana made her way up to her room, tossing her bag next to her bedroom door as she made her way over to her desk. Pulling her hair out of her ponytail, Santana crossed her legs as she sat at her desk chair and turned on her Macbook, logging onto AIM. The second she did, an instant messenger window popped up.

Thesharkfinn: hey tana.

Sexisnotdating: ugh, would you give it a rest, hudson?

Thesharkfinn: no, i will not give it a rest.

Thesharkfinn: i told you, i like you.

Sexisnotdating: i vaguely remember you mentioning that.

Thesharkfinn: you like me too. I know it.

Sexisnotdating: cocky's my game, finn.

Thesharkfinn: sorry. It's true though.

Sexisnotdating: you're crazy.

Thesharkfinn: no i'm not.

Sexisnotdating: uh, yeah you are.

Sexisnotdating: you just said that you like me.

Sexisnotdating: no guy in their right mind would ever like me.

Thesharkfinn: that doesn't make me crazy.

Thesharkfinn: you can't keep pretending like you don't feel something for me.

Sexisnotdating: watch me.

Thesharkfinn: so you do like me...

sexisnotdating: shit. That was sneaky, Hudson.

Thesharkfinn: i learn from the best ;)

sexisnotdating: flattery isn't going to get you anywhere.

Thesharkfinn: sorry, it was worth a shot.

Sexisnotdating: just give it a rest.

Thesharkfinn: no.

Sexisnotdating: finn, please... i'm asking nicely.

Thesharkfinn: i thought you didn't do nice.

Sexisnotdating: i don't, but nothing else seemed to get through your idiot head.

Thesharkfinn: gee, thanks.

Sexisnotdating: what did I tell you? I'm a bitch.

Thesharkfinn: that's a lie and we both know it.

Sexisnotdating: uh, no it's not.

Thesharkfinn: yes it is. If you were a bitch you would've blocked me.

Sexisnotdating: god damn it, Finn.

Thesharkfinn: go out with me.

Sexisnotdating: no.

Thesharkfinn: i promise you'll have a good time.

Sexisnotdating: don't make promises you can't keep.

Thesharkfinn: just one time.

Thesharkfinn: if you really don't want to go out with me again after, i'll back off.

Sexisnotdating: ...

thesharkfinn: is that a yes?

Sexisnotdating: it's an i'm thinking...

thesharkfinn: don't think. Thinking's boring :P

sexisnotdating: you'll really back off if i hate it?

Thesharkfinn: scout's honor.

Sexisnotdating: hmmm

thesharkfinn: is that a yes, then?

Sexisnotdating: it's an i'll think about it.

Sexisnotdating: while i'm taking a shower.

Sexisnotdating: enjoy the visual.

Thesharkfinn: tease.

Sexisnotdating: why, you wanna join in?

Thesharkfinn: ...

sexisnotdating: that's what i thought.

Sexisnotdating: i'll ttyl, finnocence.

Thesharkfinn: i'm going to hold you to that.

Sexisnotdating: whatever.

Thesharkfinn: that's almost like i love you in santana speak.

Sexisnotdating: don't push your luck, hudson.

Thesharkfinn: ...sorry.

sexisnotdating: i'll tell you what i decide later.

Thesharkfinn: ok. Hey tana?

Sexisnotdating: yeah?

Thesharkfinn: i like you.

Sexisnotdating: ugh. BYE.

Signing out of AIM, Santana stripped off her clothes and made her way to the bathroom to take her shower. It felt good to get the impurities off the day off of her. Showers had always been really relaxing for her, and since it was just her and her mom she didn't have to worry about how long she was in there. Showers were cleansing and they were the one bit of the day where she didn't have to think about anything except for the fact that it was shampoo first, then conditioner. And she could do that no problem. After she stepped out, Santana dried herself off and got to work on drying her hair. Some girls were lucky and they could just leave it however, but Santana's hair would just curl and she didn't like it, so she had to blow dry it. After inspecting her work in the mirror, she gave herself a smile and did her usual mad dash from the bathroom to the bedroom. Her mom was the only one home – she'd heard the door close and her mom call her name as she usually did, so there was no harm in rushing from one room to the next.

Or, well, usually there wasn't.

Honestly, Santana only noticed that Finn was in the room because he yelled "Oh my God, you're naked!" at which point she looked up and started screaming. Finn turned around and covered his eyes and Santana rushed to her closet.

"Santana, is everything okay up there?" her mom called.

"Yeah, uh... Puck sent a naked picture of himself to Finn and it freaked him out," Santana replied, the best lie that she could come up with on the spot as she pulled out some clothes. Throwing them on quickly and not even bothering with panties, she was dressed in her sundress by the time her mom came upstairs. "Turn around," Santana hissed as she heard her doorknob turning. Santana grabbed a hairbrush and combed through her hair.

"You kids okay up here?" her mom asked, with a smile that Santana knew wasn't good.

"Psh, yeah. We're fine. Like Santana said, Puck just sent me a really weird picture and I kind of wasn't prepared for it. S-sorry about the yelling," Finn insisted.

"See? All good," Santana smiled, brushing through her hair.

"Okay. If you need anything, call," her mom smiled, closing the door behind her again.

Waiting for her mom to go back down the stairs, Santana turned around and tossed her hairbrush at his head. "What the hell are you doing here?" she asked, frowning, her eyes dark.

"I'm coming to take you to dinner because unless I show up at your door and say 'we're going', you're never going to agree to go out with me," Finn insisted.

"You can't make me," Santana warned, crossing her arms over her chest. It was quite a child-like behavior but then, this was a childlike argument. So child-like.

"I'm like, twice your size and you're seriously light as a feather. I think I can take you," Finn replied, though he didn't sound very convinced. After all, she still scared him shitless sometimes when she was in one of her moods.

"You're not going to leave until I say yes, are you?" she sighed, looking away as she bit her lip.

"No, I'm not," he replied, with all the determination he could seem to muster.

Sighing a long and dramatic sigh, Santana rolled her eyes. "Fine, but I have to change, then," she insisted, moving over to her underwear drawer as Finn's eyes followed her. She couldn't see him staring, but she could feel it. "Turn around, Finnocence. I know you accidentally saw me naked, but I don't want you watching me change."

Obediently, Finn covered his eyes and laid back on her bed as she tugged off her dress and pulled on her panties and bra, before making her way to her closet and picking out a pair of jeans and a low-cut top, grabbing a purse to stick her makeup in quickly. "I'm surprised you can have a decent conversation right now," Santana admitted with a chuckle, quickly throwing on some mascara since there was no way that she was going to be seen outside of her house without at least mascara and lip gloss.

"I only saw you for a second and it hasn't really sunk in yet," Finn laughed, his eyes still closed.

Smiling to herself as she applied some lip gloss on, Santana smoothed down her top, checked herself out in the mirror, and picked up her dress, hanging it back up. "You can uncover your eyes now," she informed him absentmindedly as she closed the closet door. She still wasn't sure what this even was, but for now, she was settling on a trial run dinner. If things went well, then maybe, just maybe she would be willing to give this thing a chance.

"You look great," Finn smiled, sliding off the bed and walking next to her, putting an arm around her shoulders.

"I know," she smirked, wrapping her arm around his waist and ushering them out of her room. Bounding down in front of him and running towards the door to grab her favorite pair of heels.

"Where are you going?" her mother inquired, popping her head out of living room.

"Dinner, with Finn," she replied, quickly slipping into her heels as Finn joined her in the entry way.

"Have a nice time," her mother smiled.

"That's it? No lecture?" Santana wondered, arching her eyebrow. Honestly, she was a little shock.

"Honey, his first reaction to seeing you naked was to shout 'Oh my God, you're naked'. I'm not worried," she replied, shrugging her question off with a chuckle.

In that instant, Santana was reminded of where she got her snark, and Finn turned the same shade of red as his football jacket. Santana fought off a laugh as he mumbled a very quick, "Can we go please?" and opened the door. This was already going to be entertaining and they hadn't even gotten to their date yet.