"Guys, I can't do this anymore."

"What?" my heart pulled in anguish inside my chest, dared me to hold onto the hope that I had misheard him.

"I can't risk my life, risk our lives, anymore."

"I'm done."


Chapter 9

My breath was coming in short, little, shaky gasps. My knees felt like they were going to give out at any moment, and all I could do was just stand there and let it happen. I felt as though my life had been placed in someone elses hands, and they had just decided to rip it to shreds. My heart gave an uncertain thump as it strained to keep on beating against the crushing weight of despair that I had begun to drown in. It was ironic that it should fight so furiously for life when all I wanted to do was die.

Rian had left the following day.

We had drove him to the airport, the entire way pleading with him to see reason.

"I can't do it anymore," he had said over and over again, shaking his head as I watched the pain cloud over on his face. "I know you guys will find another drummer, and it's not like very many people know who I am anyways." And as he walked off the bus and out of our lives I felt a piece of my heart go with him. What was All Time Low without Rian Dawson? What was my life without one of my best friends? I watched him through the tinted windows of the bus until he vanished among the many people rushing around the airport. When he was gone I crawled into my bunk and succumbed to the pain.

Things would never be the same.

And as I lay there, the familiar shaking of tears rocking my body...

I decided I wouldn't live this new life anymore.

"Sing me to sleep, I'll see you in my dreams," I murmured brokenly, my brain fading into the darkness of sleep.

"Waiting to say... I miss you, I'm so sorry."


A/N: Enjoy. Reviews would be lovely.

I enjoy writing cliffhangers! Hope you enjoy this new chapter.

Stay tuned for what could possibly be the end..