Message to readers:
Sorry it took so long for me to update. I was having issues with my computer, go figure. Although I hope that I can keep it up for all of you who want to continue. Thanks for the reviews it makes me happy to see that people are interested.
Chapter 1: Nothing is Certain
Tohru awoke in darkness, only hearing the a quiet swish of a fast moving object and cold air rushing passed her face. She had no idea where she was and wasn't sure that she wanted to find out. Last time her eyes were open she was slowly drifting into a downward spiral into the other side. Tohru could have been anywhere now. She could have died and ended up in a new world or she could still be in that cold dark room and hadn't moved at all. Both would be a disappointment and she wasn't ready to face either of the outcomes. But she had to know, just opening her eyes could decide her fate. What if there was something on the other side waiting for her to open her eyes and let it know that she was ready to face whatever was ahead of her. Maybe death wasn't as bitter as most would expect, maybe it was just misunderstood. Being dead would be much more peaceful, compared to being in that room. Where the torture would continue.
Despite, her increasing fear she clenched her frail fingers into a tight fist and slowly opened her eyes. Although, when they were open there was still darkness. A pitch black space in front of her. She sat up quickly reaching her hands out in front of her. She tried to call for some assistance, but only a faint gasp came from passed her dry lips. Instinctively, her hand waved in front of her body hoping that it would collide with something placed around her. Her arms then swung to her side like she was spreading her arms to fly, this action was accompanied with a loud smack and a blistering pain on the back of her right hand.
Upon the feeling the collusion with the unknown object, she reached over calmly felt the hand craved side table that was placed beside the soft bed she was laying on. A sense of relief came over her as she discovered that she was no longer on that torn up wood floor begging for something to cover her body. For the first time in months she was laying on a mattress with several blankets covering her legs. Her clothes were dry, smelling of lavender laundry detergent, which she preferred over the thick scent of dried blood. Calmly she reached out in front of her again. Her fingers ran through the gentle cool air and was then accompanied by someone else's warm fingers. Tears came rolling down Tohru's face as she felt the soft skin and heard a small chuckle within the darkness. Their hands intertwined as the figure shifted by her legs. An unexpected warmth touched her face and carefully wiped the tears away from her cheeks.
" Miss Honda?" the figure answered.
" Y-Yuki?" she muttered as she lifted her body off the mattress to embrace him. She gasped loudly, feeling a sharp stab between her ribs that sent an electric pulse through her spine and spread through her nerves. She paused staring ahead with horrified expression. The still moment quickly passed as she slammed her back against the mattress and grasped her side with shaking hands, her eyes wide and breathing heavily. She tensed, folding her body over her crossed arms, trying to stop the pain.
" Please, don't move too much. You're badly injured," Yuki warned with a bit of woe in his tone. Although, Tohru could not see his face, his smile had fallen into an almost unreadable expression.
Tohru whimpered softly, when another hand gently stroked her head. This person ran their slender fingers through her hair, making it fall on her shoulders.
" Miss Honda?" a deep voice beckoned.
" Miss Honda, you need to calm down. Panicking will only make it hurt more," the voice coached as two hands grabbed Tohru's shoulders and forced her to lay her back against the mattress.
" Hatori-san?" she asked. She was hushed by the unknown figure.
" Don't stress your body too much, you haven't been awake for long," the voice warned.
" She seems to be doing better than before," Yuki said, his words directed towards Hatori.
"Maybe, but you don't want her to get too excited, she may pass out again,"
Again? ,she thought, Had I been awake before? Tohru turned her head in the direction where the two whispering voices were generally coming from. She reached her hand out trying to grab one of them and get their attention, because at this moment her voice was having a hard time releasing itself. Although, after trying with an excessive amount of effort, her hand fell to the side of the bed in exhaustion.
"What. . .happened. . . To me?" she managed to ask taking a stressed breath between each word.
The two men stopped their side conversation, and quickly brought their attention to the distressed girl. There was a silence, a cold bitter silence that accompanied the darkness that Tohru was currently dwelling in. Yuki stared down at her with eyes filled with a helpless shine.
" We don't know," Yuki answered. " We were hoping that you could tell us."
Tohru stared up at Yuki with a hopeless expression. Even so, he could see the spacious look in her eyes. He was aware that she couldn't see him. He was nothing, but a voice in the darkness.
Tohru wrapped her cold fingers around Yuki's hand and held it tightly. Her hand shaking from the lack of strength she had.
" Why can't I see?" she asked.
"My eyes are open, but I can't see anything, but black," she explained.
Yuki pursed his lips together in dismay. He looked over at Hatori who stared at Tohru with the same look. Even someone who was as emotionless as Hatori-san, couldn't stare at Tohru without looking lost and helpless. They both bared such terrible news that could break Tohru's heart in two. Yuki swallowed hard, trying to erase the dread out of his expression, forgetting that she couldn't see him. Hatori took a deep breath and puffed out his chest like he was filling himself with courage, before speaking.
" The condition of your eyes say that you have spent a lot of time in the darkness these passed months. Now, for most people when they spend time in nothing but darkness, the brain will take away the need to see and make other senses more acute, And-"
"Why are you telling me this?" Tohru interrupted, which was highly uncharacteristic.
" You're eyes have resorted not working, and there's no promises that you'll ever see again," Hatori explained.
Tohru's eyes grew wide as more tears were now uncontrollably running down Tohru's flushed cheeks. Her hands released Yuki's and covered her mouth as she tried to stop herself from whimpering. "-But," she tried to speak as she curled into herself resting her head against her legs, despite the unexplainable pain.
She couldn't think straight, even if she could she wouldn't know what to think. All of this time she had been wishing for only a couple of things to come after she was released from confinement. All she wanted was to be able to see someone smile again, see someone's face. After spending so much time in the darkness, she was punished by spending the rest of her life in that same lightless state. She had survived that horrible experience and for what? Not to be able to see any of them, to only hear them in this dark realm that made them all feel so distant.
Why would anyone. . . . Yuki thought as he reached for Tohru's hands and pulled them away from her tear soaked face. He stroked them only to comfort her as she cried.
Yuki paused, sensing a presence from behind him. He glanced back only to see Kyo silently standing in the doorway looking at Yuki and Tohru with dark eyes. A glare was passed between the two of them.
" Are you just going to stand there?" Yuki growled.
Tohru suddenly stopped crying, her body shifting into a low tremble as she looked up into the empty space. Kyo's eyes met Tohru's in a blank gaze. He stared at her for what seemed like eternity. She stared at him, like she was desiring his company.
" Calm down, Tohru. You're going to make it worse," Hatori warned as he placed his hand against her back. His eyes then looked at Kyo with the same amount of disappointment. "Either come in or leave," Hatori demanded.
Kyo's eyes were removed from Tohru and were brought to Hatori. He uncrossed his arms and stood without support in the doorway. His fingers curled into a fist and were held close to his side. For some reason, Kyo was preparing to fight someone. Just hearing Hatori's voice made Kyo want to lunged at him.
"Kyo. . ." Tohru whispered, her eyes still staring in his direction. Kyo looked back at her his chest rising and falling rapidly, his fist still clenched together. The only difference was his eyes had began to shine with a thin coat of tears that he was holding back so well. He turned away from them and stomped down the hallway.
After getting far enough away from the room, he stopped. His legs unable to move any further. There was no true explanation to why. Maybe it was because his instincts were telling him to turn around and make peace with his demons or that he wasn't going anywhere if he left now. He grunted in frustration and then swung his fist towards the wall that shook under the collusion. If only that made everything better. If one fist could rewind time and start it all over. But like most things Kyo did, it was completely useless. He leaned against the wall for support as the oxygen began to feel heavy in his lungs. His legs trembling, wanting to give out and let him fall to the ground. An ill feeling crawled from his toes all the way up to his head, making every organ in his body twist. He felt angry at himself, lonely, like there was no one to catch his emotions. Like he would dwell in these unfortunate feelings alone. When suddenly a hand grabbed his shoulder and turned him around, slamming his back against the wall.
" What the hell is your problem?" Yuki asked.
" Tohru has been missing for two months and all you can do is stare at her like an idiot?" he yelled as he grabbed the collar of Kyo's shirt and jabbed his elbow into his chest.
"Let go of me," Kyo demanded through his teeth.
" Why should I? So, you can go be a coward in a corner somewhere," Yuki teased.
Kyo grabbed Yuki's wrist and forcefully pried his fingers off of his shirt.
" Mind your own fucking business," Kyo warned as he released Yuki's wrist and continued down the hallway.
" Don't worry about him, Yuki-san. He'll do it when he's ready," advised Hatori whom was standing in the doorway of Tohru's room.
" Why do you think he's acting this way? He's the one who wouldn't sleep until he found her. Now he doesn't even want to look at her,"
" I think finding Miss Honda-san was more than just saving her life. I think he was trying to find peace in knowing that she was okay,"
Yuki pursed his lips together in a tight line as he watched Kyo walk out the front door of the house. For once, Yuki could admit that he understood the trouble Kyo was going through. They all wanted assure that Tohru was unharmed, but it was obvious that she had been through a great amount of pain. That she had gone through a lot of trauma that would change her physically and emotionally. Yuki wasn't prepared to watch such a beautiful person wither before him, and he was aware that Kyo felt the same way. Although, Yuki had come to terms with the fact that Tohru would become a different person. For better or worse he wanted to make sure that Tohru was happy despite her new wisdom of the bitter world that was beyond the walls of this house. While Kyo tried to avoid it all together, and ignore this new person and carry the old with him. Why the hell he would suffer that much to hold on to something that will never be again was beyond him. If anything the easier thing to do would be to separate from the past. Although, for someone as stubborn as Kyo, doing it the easy way wasn't always as simple.
" I see some of us still have some growing up to do," Yuki answered quietly as he turned around and went back into Tohru's room.
" I'm sorry Miss Honda," Yuki apologized for his insensitive cousin.
Yuki sat down on Tohru's bed again, expecting a face to face conversation with her. Since it had been so long. Yuki had been gone several months before Tohru had disappeared and now they were meeting again under unfortunate circumstances.
"Miss Honda?" Yuki called softly afraid that the long pause was because she had passed out again. Although, that was not the case. Tohru's head eerily turned towards Yuki and stared at him her lip quivering and her eye blood shot.
" I've done something terribly wrong, haven't I?" she asked with a shaken voice.
" Why would say that?" Yuki answered , confused on how any of this could be her fault.
" I should have been more careful. I shouldn't have been walking alone that late at night," Tohru began to rant on the night she was kidnapped off the sidewalk in town. Most of the words were not comprehended due to Tohru's mumbling. Although, what Yuki did understand was;
" I deserved this punishment, I should have thought it through,"
Suddenly, Tohru felt a forcefully pull on her chin lifting her off the mattress slightly. It would appear that Yuki was becoming edgy due to Tohru's explanation of her disappearance.
" Don't you dare blame this on yourself," he said in a surprisingly nurturing tone.
"You couldn't have prevented this. It could have happened to anyone," he explained.
" Then why does Kyo hate me?" she asked sounding like a small child that obtained a lack of understanding. " If it's not my fault, then why is he pretending like I don't exist?" she asked.
Yuki looked down at her with an unreadable expression. His hand was removed from her chin, so that his arms could wrap around her. Tohru burrowed her head further into his chest, soaking in every bit of comfort. She had missed this feeling of being held. It was not long before her disappearance that she could even be this close to Yuki, and she felt relieved to be in this place. Despite that, Tohru was longing to be in the arms of someone else right about now. Someone who had held her before, but was too far away to hold her now.
" He's sorting through some feelings right now," Yuki explained.
" He wouldn't have to if it wasn't for me," she answered.
They sat like that for a while, until Tohru passed out yet again within his arms. Yuki laid her down and covered her entire body with the blanket. Tohru would need her rest, because a parade of familiar faces would be by here soon. The now curse free zodiac would be gather all together again. As if another annual banquet were to come forth one more time.
