Chapter 14

But if you hesitate / Just one second too late / I'll know you're covering up your hearts true state

"So is that why we didn't work out? Because you're gay?" Sam questioned Santana as she hurried to her next class.

"No, because you weren't good boyfriend material."

"Please, I am the best." Santana scoffed, "But seriously is that why? Because I'm not upset if that is the case…"

"Leave me alone, Sam!" Santana ran passed him into her next class where everyone stopped and looked at her. There was silence.

"What?"

"So you have a thing for red head's huh?" She heard Karoskfy say.
"What?"

"I always knew there was something off about you." She heard another football player say.

"Glee Club sure does turn them, don't they?"

Santana ran from the room and headed towards the girl's bathroom, she went into a stall and closed the door and slumped down on the floor and began to cry.

"Santana?" She heard the angelic voice of Brittany from in front of the stall.

"Go away." She said between sniffles.

"Are you okay?"

"What do you think?"

"Can we talk outside the stall? I hate not seeing your face, I feel like I'm talking to a wall…Unless I am…Then that's too weird."

Santana couldn't help but let a smile creep upon her lips. She opened the stall and let Brittany pull her up. She pulled off some tissue and wiped her nose with it and splashed cold water onto her face then slumped back onto the floor. Brittany sat beside her.

"You should be in class." Santana said to Brittany.

"My teachers feel my grade would be better if I didn't go."

"Lucky you…"

"What's wrong? Is it because of that song Mandy sang? She didn't sound that bad."

Santana smiled.

"Yay I made you smile!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Santana blew her nose as Brittany watched.

"Ya know, you've always been this brave person to me. Someone I can sort of look up to when I needed them and I really admired and loved that about you." Santana sniffled.

"Do you still think that? I mean I walk into my classroom and Mandy's song aftermath is right there." Santana let tears fall slowly out of her eyes, "I don't know if I can handle that, Brittany. I'm not ready for that. I don't want to be another Kurt. I can't…" Santana couldn't help herself she began to cry loudly while Brittany cuddled her.

"It's okay…its okay…"

"No it's not." Santana laid her head on Brittany's shoulder, "Everyone hates me now, Brittany. I blew off Joey two years ago just to be at the top and now I'm at the bottom. You can't help who you love, Brit…"

"Do you love her?" Brittany asked.

"Who?"

"Mandy."

"I don't know, I never really thought about it…I guess in a sense."

"Oh…"

"But it's not like anything special or anything…"

"I see…"

"Please Brittany; I just need someone to talk to."

"I'm here Santana; I'm always going to be here for you."

Next period…

Santana gripped her text books close to her body and made her way down the hallway towards her next class. But she was stopped by Karofsky.

"You know it's funny, I was going through my slushie list and found out that you haven't even tasted a slushie."

"That's how it goes…" Santana tried to move passed him but he stopped her.

"You know your queerness is making it hard for the rest of us to be normal."

"Normal? You think me being who I am isn't normal?"

"So you admit that it's true, you're gay."

"I admitted nothing."

"It's really funny though, Santana. I always thought you were pretty."

"And suddenly that changes? I didn't know you were so embarrassed."

"Embarrassed about what?"

"Embarrassed to accept people who aren't like you, Dave. Fine, I admit it. I like girls. Is that what you wanted to hear? I admit it. I have nothing to hide; I'm not scared of you or anyone else. I am happy to be who I am."

"I'm glad you are, because at this school being who you are isn't exactly tolerated."

"You may have ran Kurt away but you won't run me away, do your worst. Do it."

Karofsky went to throw the slushie only to feel a hand on his slushie hand. He turned back to see Joey, he scoffed.

"Another one of your queer friends?" He asked Santana.

"The queerest." Joey said with a smile.

"You throw that slushie at her and then we'll have a problem." He turned to see Mandy standing beside Santana with her arms crossed.

"Are you threatening me?"

"Worse, gaying you." Mandy said with a laugh.

"Drop the slushie, pretty boy." Joey said.

Karofsky looked around to find everyone looking at him and the three girls surrounding him. He sighed and dropped the slushie.

"This ain't over, Lopez." He said before disappearing.

"Thank you, guys." Santana said hugging both Joey and Mandy.

"I wouldn't thank me if I were you…" Joey said.

"Why?"

"I've been a bitch to you and I'm really sorry…"

"What?"

"I told everyone about the song that Mandy sang to you."

"I thought we were friends?" Mandy said with a sense of hurt.
"I'm really sorry Mandy; I didn't mean to hurt you…"

"Just me?" Santana asked.

"You hurt me when you threw away our friendship, two years ago. I just wanted to hurt you the way you hurt me."

"Congrats." Santana said rolling her eyes.

"But seeing you just then, it reminded me why I was friends with you in the first place. I'm sorry, Santana."

Santana sighed, "No, I'm sorry. I should have never ended our friendship just to be popular. You see where it got me. Wasn't even worth it. Truce?" She stuck out her hand.

"Truce." Joey said with a smile.

"Well, since we're talking about my song…Did you like it?" Mandy asked.

Santana looked at her and smiled, "Yes, I did like it Mandy."

"Soooo does that mean you'll wear my necklace?"

Santana sighed. The necklace held so much emotions dealing with Brittany, but it had been at least two months since Santana confessed her feelings. Maybe it was time for Santana to move on…

"Yes, I'll wear your necklace. I'll be honored."

Mandy squeezed Santana hard, but Santana couldn't find herself to smile as she gazed to find Brittany staring sadly at her.