So it seems like I'm back to posting at regular intervals. Apparently I can't write when Kurt is happy, and I can't write when Kurt is sad. I need therapy badly.
For those of you worrying that Jute is turning too much into Blaine let me just say:
JUTE IS MINE, BITCHES! *evil laugh*
Ahem… Okay. Now that that little psychotic episode is over (and the disclaimer is also out of the way), on with the show.
Star Consort - Chapter three
The silence in the Hummel living room was starting to get to Finn.
Bebe had arrived shortly after Finn and Kurt had gotten home from school, despite the fact that it would have been disgustingly early in the morning for her (Finn often thought back to the first day he met Bebe, and the fact that it had practically been the middle of the night for her). Carole had come over to say goodbye, despite the fact that Burt had insisted they were only going to be gone a short time and goodbyes weren't necessary.
Carole had agreed, but the silence was the truth: they weren't sure if the Hummel men were coming back at all.
Finn had finally had enough. "It's almost time for dinner. Why don't we go out to Breadstix and get our minds off all this stuff."
"I'm not really up to going out right now," Carole admitted apologetically. "I think I'm just going to head back to my place. Why don't you call Rachel and take her out if you don't feel like staying here by yourself?"
"Sure. Sure, that'd be great." Except it didn't feel great, despite how much he loved spending time with Rachel. He wished Kurt was here; Kurt was always great at explaining why Finn's feelings didn't always make sense.
Finn was walking his mom to her car when Rachel came up to them.
"Rachel, hi." Finn realized the second he saw Rachel that he couldn't want to see her more.
"Hello, Finn. Mrs.- Hudson."
"Rachel, sweetie," Carole smiled at her, not acknowledging Rachel's indecision. "Finn's going to be on his own tonight, with Kurt and his dad out of town. You take good care of my boy, okay?"
"I will."
After Carole got in her car and drove away, Finn turned to Rachel and noted, "I didn't think I was going to see you tonight. You want to come in? I'm sure Kurt has something in his DVD collection you'd want to watch."
"That would be lovely," Rachel told him, though she looked like she was bothered by something. "Kurt and his dad are already gone then?"
"You just missed them."
Rachel looked confused now. "Really? I didn't pass them on the road."
Shit. Finn wasn't allowed to mention the jump technology, but he didn't want to lie to Rachel, either. He ushered her into the living room while he thought up something vague to say. "Well, Kurt's grandmother came and got them." There. That was true, and explained why both the Hummel vehicles were still in the garage.
Rachel nodded, but she still seemed concerned. "Actually, if you could grab Kurt's Wicked CD, I'd rather just have some background music tonight."
"Sure." Finn ran double time to get the disc, hoping that Rachel meant for them to have an 'intimate' evening in. That would be a thousand times better than dwelling on what would happen when Kasha was awake. But when he got back, his hopes were dashed by the fact that Rachel was still standing there, looking uncomfortable. "Is something wrong?"
"That was going to be my question," she noted quietly. "Finn did something happen this summer that you don't want to tell me?"
Oh. So they were having THAT conversation. Finn had kind of been expecting it. "No," he declared. "I want to tell you everything that happened this summer. I just can't."
Rachel looked like she wanted to cry. "Finn, I thought that when we decided to be together that we were going to be honest with each other. You even told me about that disastrous night with Santana."
Yeah, he had. And he had Kurt to thank for wording it in such a way that Rachel actually felt sorry for him. That made him even more determined to not let it slip what Kurt had been doing that summer. "I know. And I've got so much to tell you. So much crap went down over the summer, but some of it was really amazing, and it SUCKS that I have to keep it a secret. But I promised Kurt I wouldn't say anything until he was ready to talk about it."
"Finn, I'm really worried," Rachel admitted. "You were somewhere you couldn't even answer my frequent e-mails. And yet they somehow have top of the line medical facilities there? Where did you and Kurt go over the summer? Some Middle Eastern emirate that even Wikipedia hasn't heard of?"
"You googled Kurt's home- country?" Damnit, he almost said planet.
"Somewhat difficult given that you haven't even given us a name to this place," Rachel scolded. "You'd tell me if you went to North Korea, wouldn't you?"
Finn's jaw dropped. He knew everyone had been guessing about what was going on with Kurt, but that was just ridiculous. "Does Kurt look North Korean? Or any kind of Korean?" Though admittedly Kurt didn't look like ET, either.
"I know he doesn't," Rachel snapped anxiously. "I'm grasping at straws."
Finn hugged her. "You don't have to worry. Sateen isn't some evil empire; it's a beautiful place. Kurt just has a lot to deal with right now, and I need to wait for things to settle down before I can fill you in on all of it."
"Sateen?" Rachel repeated, looking just a little mollified by this small bit of information.
Finn winced. "You didn't hear that from me. Please don't tell anyone, Kurt would seriously kill me if I knew I told you even that much."
"Your secret's safe with me."
Kurt had only been waiting in the anteroom outside Kasha's medical suite for a few minutes when, true to his word, Jute arrived to keep him company. "Jute!" Kurt was on his feet and hugging Jute without even realizing he'd done it. "Thanks for coming."
"This is an important moment for you," Jute answered. "There's no where I'd rather be."
"It's still appreciated," Kurt informed him.
"You look lovely," Jute told him. They both blushed a little as Jute ran his hand along Kurt's shirt. "This reminds me of the paneling in my grandfather's offices."
"That's a good thing?" Kurt asked, surprised. On Earth, most people didn't consider comparing their clothing to upholstery to be a compliment.
Jute nodded, then raised an intrigued eyebrow as he slid his hand under the sleeve. "What is this? I can't see through it."
Kurt didn't know what THAT was supposed to mean. "It's silk noil. You're not supposed to be able to see through it."
Jute smiled at him, naughtily. "I can see your fire through anything, holiness. Well, anything except this. It's fascinating."
Kurt looked down, surprised. Now that Jute mentioned it, his water sense was completely obscured by his shirt. "Well, they used to say silk had magical properties. I guess that's why."
"To the few on your world with a little element shaping, it must have indeed seemed magic." Jute sat Kurt down and curled up next to him. "Did your grandmother say how long this would take?"
Kurt shook his head. "They don't know. No one has ever tried to repair this much brain damage at once before. It could be hours, or it could go quite quickly."
"Hopefully it's soon. My mother wants to have you for dinner, and if you're still here it will make for rather awkward seating arrangements."
Kurt laughed, despite his distraction. "Have I met your mother before?" He knew it hadn't happened recently, but he wasn't sure about when he was little.
"I think she went to your grandfather's funeral," Jute noted. "I didn't go, so of course I can't be sure if you actually met her there."
"There were so many people there that day," Kurt remembered. It had been long enough ago that the intense sadness he felt that day had faded. But he still remembered the confusing mass of people. "If she was there I don't remember. It felt like I'd been introduced to half of Sateen."
"You probably were," Jute chuckled.
"So what's she like?" Kurt asked. "You can get my entire life history off the news net, and I know almost nothing about you."
"Well for starters, when I was born there wasn't three days holiday. And a parade," Jute teased.
"There was no such thing!" Kurt insisted, laughing. Then he paused, pensive. "Was there?"
"You were the first male heir to the Water Standard in a hundred years," Jute told him. "It was a big deal. So yes, in fact there were four parades; I watched them all on the news net after you came back. The children's bubble pageant was my favorite."
"You're making this up," Kurt giggled, though he had a sinking feeling Jute was serious. "And you're getting off topic."
"So I am." Jute looked down, a little self-conscious for once. "My mother has the somewhat uncomfortable distinction of being 'the most beautiful woman on Sateen, now that Princess Kasha, water is unavailable to be looked at'."
Kurt winced. "Yes, that's fairly awkward."
"It's not just about the coma, though," Jute assured him. "People have referred to her as that since she married your father and moved to Earth."
"That's so rude!"
"Being second to your mother is a great compliment," Jute countered. "I don't think my mother has ever minded."
"Well, when we go to dinner, I'll be sure to compliment her beauty without comparing her unfavorably to my mother," Kurt declared.
"I'm sure she'll be flattered." Jute paused briefly, thinking. "I know you wished to talk about me. But there is a thing I've always been curious about. How exactly did your parents meet? No one seems to know a word of it."
Kurt had to think about that. It had been a long time since he'd heard the story and he was so small at the time. "You'll have to bear with me if there are any confusing bits, I'm going off of an eight-year-old's memory."
Jute just nodded, so Kurt continued. "My mother was in advanced training, preparing for the day she would eventually bear the Water Standard. I'm not really sure what all is involved, but there's this meditation exercise that helps you become more in tune with the element."
Jute nodded again. "We have similar techniques for fire. I could teach you if you'd like."
"Maybe after this business with my mother is settled." In truth, Kurt was much more interested in advanced training when it was Jute offering. "Well, at the time there was a fact finding mission to other planets, including Earth. It wasn't well known, because apparently no one thought it was that important or interesting. So your grandfather was really surprised when my mother, who'd never had any exploration or diplomatic training, showed up insisting that she needed to be on that team."
"Really?" Jute exclaimed. "I'd heard stories about how the meditation can sometimes bring visions, but I've never heard of anyone else-"
"Anyone else?" Kurt interrupted. "You've had visions, too?"
"Well," Jute replied, sounding far more blasé than he had any need to. "I have had one, though I don't make it common knowledge."
"May I ask what it was about?" Kurt asked, suddenly dying of curiosity.
"Of course," Jute told him, still with that excessive casualness. "Though keep in mind that the ways of the element are mysterious and may not mean what they mean on the surface."
"It was right after I broke up with Ramie, and I was throwing myself into my studies." It did Kurt's heart good to hear Jute mention his ex's name without any trace of emotional upset. In fact, Jute was looking at Kurt with the oddest smile on his face. "I saw myself in the heart of the fire, as always. But then suddenly the Water Standard appeared in the sky and suddenly unleashed all this water on me. You'd think the fire would go out, but it actually burned all the brighter with the water pouring down on it."
Kurt returned Jute's smile with his own. "You're right. The meaning of that vision is definitely mysterious," he teased.
Jute kissed Kurt's hand, on the palm as was the Sateen way and damn, if it wasn't the most sensual thing Kurt had ever felt. "Your grandmother asked me to bring you my notes from my sex studies. Don't let me forget to give them to you."
"Thank you," Kurt replied. "I don't think I could find myself a tutor willing to come to Earth, even if I wanted one."
"I could-" Jute broke off, recognizing how forward he was being.
Somehow though, Kurt didn't really mind. "I don't want you to feel like you have to censor yourself around me," Kurt told him. "I may be surprised, but I'm not going to scold you."
Jute nodded. "Have you ever had a lover, Kurt?"
"No." Kurt felt his cheeks get hot, but he refused to let himself be embarrassed by such a simple question. "I have to admit that knowing you have YEARS of sexual experience is a little daunting."
"I can teach you anything you want to know," Jute noted simply. Kurt was actually surprised that he could say that without being boastful or pushy. It was just knowledge to him. "I hope that isn't the reason you're holding back with me."
"You know my reasons," Kurt stated, though he was weakening on all of them. "I would just be more nervous about the sex thing if I didn't have other things to be concerned by."
"Kurt, my need for you isn't because I want someone to 'get me off'," Jute told him. "I don't have a scoreboard built into my headboard. I like you Kurt, and I want to taste you because of the 'you', not the 'taste'."
Now Kurt was sure his cheeks were red, but from arousal rather than embarrassment. "I've never thought about it like that."
Jute moved in closer to Kurt's mouth, and couldn't keep his eyes off of it. "Kurt…. Would you like to-"
What Jute could have gotten Kurt to agree to (and Kurt suspected it was a lot) remained a mystery. Kurt had been waiting to hear the sounds of medical personnel leaving his mother's suite, but he hadn't anticipated hearing Kasha herself.
"Burt, don't be ridiculous," Kasha stated as she walked out into the waiting area, her voice firm and unwavering. Hearing it made Kurt feel like he'd been transported back in time. "I want to see our Kurtling. He must have been so-"
Kasha saw Kurt. It felt like the air rushed out of the room, for both of them.
There was no reason why she would even recognize him, but she looked deep into his eyes.
It felt like she was looking into his soul. And that she could see HIM.
Burt's eyes widened a little, but he gave no other sign of concern. "You can see Kurt as soon as you get settled back in your room. You shouldn't push yourself."
Kasha had heard none of it. "Blessed waters." She turned to Burt, her face growing white and frightened. "How long?" she asked. "How long was I hurt?"
"Kasha, you need to rest," Burt insisted.
"No! I want to know." She turned back to Kurt, her eyes filling with tears. "I'm not stupid, Burt. You think I don't recognize my own son? How long?"
There was a long moment of tense silence. Kurt certainly couldn't answer her question. His body was shaking, and it was taking all his control not to cry himself. Kasha turned back to her husband. "Burt, please," she pleaded.
"I-" Burt gave up, nodding regretfully. "It's been about eight years. Ten, on Sateen."
"Ten years." Kasha turned back to Kurt, guilt lacing her expression. "Oh. No, baby I'm so sorry."
"No one blames you," Kurt insisted, though his voice sounded strained and numb. He couldn't understand why he couldn't move. He wanted to hug his mother. Have her promise him everything was all right now. And yet he just stood there.
It was Kasha who finally closed the gap. She raised one had to his face, sad yet astonished. "You grew up so handsome. Kurt… Damn me to the driest place on Sateen! I'm so sorry I couldn't be there for you! I'm so sorry." And she hugged him. For the first time in half his life.
Kurt was startled by how much strength there was in her embrace. She wept into his hair, and he cried into hers. "It's okay, mom. The only thing that matters is that you're back." It sounded dull and unconvincing even to his own ears.
Despite the stasis maintaining her normal level of vitality, Kurt was struck by how different this was. He was actually taller than his mother now, and he thought he might actually be strong enough to lift her off her feet if he wanted. He was the one comforting her, soothing her guilt. It definitely wasn't the hug he remembered.
Kurt broke off the hug and tried to re-establish his control. "Why don't you let Dad get you settled in your suite again. I'll go get us some lunch and we can catch up."
Kasha nodded, wiping her eyes. "You're right. Don't be too long though, [little pogol]."
"Never going to be a problem." Kurt looked back at his dad, noticing Bebe's absence for the first time. "Is grandmother all right?"
"Just taking a breather," Burt told him. "Whatever you get for lunch, make sure you get her more than just a senior's portion."
Kurt chuckled weakly. But as soon as Burt had taken Kasha back into her suite his face dropped and he looked as sad as he felt.
Jute wrapped his arms around Kurt. "Are you all right?"
"It's not the same." Kurt had hoped for this moment for weeks. Now it appeared that he wasn't ever going to get back what he'd lost.
Jute's small sigh was loud against Kurt's ear. "I suppose it isn't, is it?"
Kurt shook his head, refusing to let this get to him. "It doesn't matter. I have back more than I ever thought possible. I'm going to be happy today."
Jute didn't look completely convinced by this. "You know you don't have to censor yourself with me, either. Come on. Let go with me, and when you talk to your mom you won't have it hanging over you."
Kurt nodded, his head falling lower with every shake. "It just hit me that half of what I missed was her, and half was how I felt when I had her," Kurt admitted. "I just- I wish I could curl up in her lap one more time."
Jute held Kurt while he cried.
(to be continued)
