Chapter Three
Shurikens and Pink Tiger Kimonos
(//AN: Yeah. So sorry I haven't been updating. I got grounded from my compute. Yes I'm still grounded. I'm just doing this stuff in secret, when everyone is in bed. So This is the next chapter in Judgement Day: Shurikens and Pink Tiger Kimonos. Tabby isn't here with me today to nag because her father is really sick and she's depressed. Poor Tabby. So Itachi will be presenting our disclaimer and stuff. Right Itachi?
Itachi: Stuff it.
Me: Come on now, its only one time. Give it thirty seconds.
Itachi: Why me?
Me: Cuz you're my favorite character and you're awesome.
Itachi: Of course I'm awesome! Women bow at my feet at my awesomeness! I AM INVINCIBLE! Hah! In your face Sasuke!
Me: O_O. okay... then... Just get on with it.
Itachi: SASUKE! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE AND DO THE DISCLAIMER!
Sasuke: I don't wanna. I'm busy.
Itachi: Too bad!
Sasuke: Go have Kisame do a strip show.
Itachi: Why?
Sasuke: Cuz you know you can't get some.
Itachi: Oh and you can?
Itachi: Want me to get Sakura to prove it?
Me: OKAY!! No one wants to see that happen! Sasuke! Go do stuff with Sakura.
Sasuke: Will do. *leaves to do unsaid things with Sakura*
Me: Itachi... disclaimer... now.
Itachi: Jay don't own nothing. Review. Or I shall-
Me: Good boy! 3 Let's get on with it!
Sasuke woke in an unfamiliar environment. "What the hell?"
"You're finally awake? It's about time." A voice said as Sasuke sat up. The Uchiha looked up. There sat Tsunade, in all her glory.
"How the hell did I get here?"
"You were sleeping on a bench. So I brought you to my place." Tsunade answered.
"Why would you do that?"
"Because Naruto's a retard and I pity you."
"So, where are they?"
"Where are who?"
"Sakura and Naruto."
"The old bridge at Team 7 training grounds. Don't you want to eat before you leave?" Tsunade asked, glancing over her shoulder to the refridgerator.
"Nah, Naruto will probably drag me to Ichiraku later." Sasuke replied, getting up.
"Good point. Make sure you get home before Naruto does! I don't want to have to be your care taker all of the time!" Tsunade said, as the raven haired ninja rushed out of the door, leaving Naruto's black shirt behind.
The Bridge
"Look what the cat dragged in." Sai said bluntly.
"Be nice, Sai. You'll have to once Kakashi-senpai gets here." Sakura scolded.
"IF he gets here. That perv has been late since... forever." Naruto replied.
"Ain't that the truth." Sasuke was leaning on the bridge beside Naruto who sat on the edge of the bridge. Sai was sitting at Sakura's feet against the rail and was drawing something. Sakura was doing as Sasuke. Finally Kakashi arrived with a 'poof'.
"Sorry I'm late, there was this old lady and-"
"Save it old man. You're a liar and we know it." Naruto said.
"Yeah Kakashi. You realize that lieing shortens your life by one minute? You're time's comeing." Sakura said having an evil moment.
"Okay... anyway, no missions today. So I thought we'd spar. Sasuke, Sakura. Ground 7-1. Naruto, Sai. Ground 7-2. Let's go!" Kakashi replied, freaked out by Sakura's comment.
Sasuke/ Sakura
Sakura pulled her gloves over her hands. "Are you ready Sasuke?" she asked.
"What? No Sasuke-kun? I thought we're going back to normal, Saku-chan."
"Fine then, Sasuke-kun. If we're going back to normal, why are you calling me Saku-chan?" Sakura came back, taking her stance.
"Cuz, I feel like it... Saku-chan." Sasuke replied, taking a similar stance.
"Aw, you know that's not fair, Sasuke-kun."
"Bite me."
"I would but I don't eat trash." Sakura said going in to punch the Uchiha in the face.
Naruto/ Sai
"How do you think the Hag and the Traitor are doing?" Sai asked, no emotion visible in his coal black eyes, taking a stance.
"Sakura's whipping Sasuke's ass." Naruto said, confidently.
The Sasuke look-a-like quickly scribbled on to a scroll as Naruto made Kagebunshins. The fight began and for a while it went on as usual. Sai created ink creatures and Naruto pulled out around five hundred shuriken. That was until Naruto decided to do a Harem jutsu.
Kakashi who sat in a tree passed out.
Sai was unemotional and stopped scribbling briefly to take a quick glance at Nara. "Are you serious?" He asked.
"What? But every dude falls for my Harem Jutsu. You're abnormal man!" Naruto said, still in Harem form. He charged the chakra in his hand to create Rasengan.
Sakura/ Sasuke
Both ninja's were panting. Naruto and Sai had completed their spar nearly two hours ago. Naruto won, which was rare when it came to him fighting Sai.
Sakura and Sasuke lunged at each other again, only to stagger abit. Sasuke threw a shuriken and Sakura dodged just in time. But the shuriken grazed her neck.
Sakura threw another kunai, only to have Sasuke barely dodge it, leaving a small wound on his shoulder.
"Sasuke! Sakura! Enough! I'm ending this fight before you kill each other!" Kakashi said, poofing down from the tree he was in. The two shinobi collapsed to the ground too tired to go anywhere else.
Naruto handed Sasuke his canteen. The Uchiha took the drink and greedily ingested the contents. Kakashi had brought Sakura her own. She drank from it, catching her breath in the process.
"Kakashi, what time is it?" Sasuke asked.
"Time to buy a new watch." Kakashi said, grinning wide.
"Seriously, I gotta be at the Hokage Tower at 6:00." Sasuke said.
"It's about 5:52."
"I'll go with him!" Naruto volunteered, jumping up and down like an idiot.
"Yeah. I'll go with Sasuke-kun too." Sakura replied.
"Tick, tock. Tick, tock." Kakashi said.
"Hey, hey! Let's go! Sasuke-teme can't die yet! He still has Uchiha babies to make with Sakura-chan!" Sakura ignored the comment as Naruto pulled her and Sasuke followed close behind.
Hokage Tower
They arrived at the Hokage Tower just as the clock turned 6:00. "Right on time Uchiha and friends." Tsunade said. "Sasuke. To get the sweat off your chest, you can keep your life. However, You will have six months jail time; no poroll. After that. You will be put on probabtion for another six months. During that time you will be stripped of your shinobi priveledges. No missions. After that, Genin ranked missions only. D ranked and C ranked. You will not be able to take the Chuunin exams for six months. Then and only then your life may return to normal." The She-kage explained.
"A year and a half of hell? I can deal. So do they arrest me now or later?" Sasuke asked.
"Later. Apparently there is a festival the original Konoha 12 are planning for your return tonight. I shall let you go but tomorrow morning you are to report first thing to this office. In the meantime, get out."
The trio obeyed and left the office. As they were walking out of the Hokage Tower, they bumped into Sai.
"Hello, Ugly." The Sasuke-look-a-like said.
"Beat it emo." Sasuke said brushing past his could be twin.
"I dunno. I wanna get to know you more, Traitor, seeing as we've only met once. And you weren't even polite enough to say hi." Sai said, casting an oh so famous fake smile.
Before anyone could say anything, Ino came and spouted loudness... she came running up to the quadro. "Hey forehead! Hey Sasuke! Naruto, is it okay if we steal Sakura for a few hours?"
"Er, yeah, I guess. I'm not her keeper Ino. What times the party?" Naruto replied.
"Seven tonight. Okay? All the guys are meeting up at Shikamaru's place to get ready. If you go now, Mrs. Naara won't be nagging you." Ino said, dragging Sakura towords the Ino's house.
"Okay, well you heard blondie. Do you really want to be nagged, by Mrs. Naara all night?" Naruto asked. Sasuke and Sai shrugged and followed Naruto to the lazy bum's house.
Girls: Later that Night
Sakura was dressed in a red halter and a white mini skirt. On her feet she also wore black stilletoes. Her make up consisted of light green eyeshadow, black eyeliner and blush. Her hair was is a tight but messy bun that had little spikes of hair coming from it. She looked herself over in a full length mirror. "I look like a stripper." She complained to Ino.
"You do not! You look sexy, my friend! Sasuke's gonna die of drool loss when he sees you on that stage!" Ino comforted. "No one dressed by me ever looks bad! I mean did you see Kurenai's wedding dress last year? Now look again and tell me you don't look hot."
Sakura did as she was told and looked at herself again and the more she thought about it, the less complaints she had. She had to admit it, she was hot.
Ino wore a purple speghetti strap middrift and a white super mini skirt. The piece of hair that usually covered her right eye was pulled back in a purple butterflly clip. The rest of her hair was pulled back in a larger matching clip. She had decided to wear a little eyeliner and lip gloss but that was about it. "Hey TenTen, are you done helping Hinata yet?" Ino called to the back room.
"Yeah. Here she comes!" TenTen replied sending Hinata out of the room.
The girls marveled at the Hyuuga. "Hinata! You look awesome! Naruto's gonna die!" Sakura said, giving Hinata a thumbs up.
"You really think so?" Hinata asked, looking at herself in the mirror. She wore a baby blue tube top that fit her curves nicely along with a short white skirt. It wasn't a mini skirt, but it was still on the short side. She had gone with a plain face and her long hair was tied back elegantly in a nice and neat pony tail.
"Okay, TenTen. Let's see what you've got." The weapon's mistress stared blankly at the three girls in front of her.
"What? I was just going to wear this." TenTen was wearing ripped jeans and a pink t-shirt. Her hair was up in the neat buns that were usually at the top of her head.
Suddenly, Ino tossed her a change of cloathes. "GET CHANGED! NOW!" the blond brunette, fearing for her life, ran into the other room to change. She came out a moment later, wearing an extremely large green bandana around the chest, which only covered her breasts and naval. She also wore very, very, VERY short white shorts that barely covered her butt. Her hair was down in its natural form, down almost past her chest. It slightly crimped because of the way she had her hair up all of the time.
Ino gawked. "TenTen! How the hell do manage to keep your hair in those small tight buns?" TenTen's face paled as she broke out in a fit of giggles.
"Ino. *gasp* That came out *gasp* wrong!" TenTen said her face slightly red from laughing so hard. Ino cringed.
"YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! God. I swear I'm gonna kick Lee's ass. He's such a pervert." Ino said.
"Okay, not the point." Sakura said grinning as she took a seat next to Hinata, her skirt riding up a bit. Hinata giggled. "So what are we going to do for the guys, Ino?" All she got in response was a big pink kimono in her face. "What the hell was that for, Ino-pig?"
"Just put it on forehead! I'll explain it to you when we get to Hinata's ball room." Ino replied, handing the other girls kimonos as well.
Meanwhile: Naara Residence
"Oh my god! I look like a monkey!" Naruto said looking over his shoulder at the reflection in the mirror.
"Dobe, stop complaining. You only have to wear it for a few hours. Get over it." Sasuke said bluntly, removing the loose tie from around his neck.
"Why am I the only one that has to look all dressy?" Naruto asked, pouting.
"I think you look nice, Naruto-san. Now unless you want to take a trip to Tsunade's office before the party, I suggest you zip your lip, young man, while I work on Uchiha-san." Sasuke's eye twiched. He looked over to Shikamaru urgently.
"Uh mom... I think, Sasuke will blow up from holding insults in if you start messing with his hair again." Shikamaru said blocking his mother from Sasuke's view.
"But his hair looks like the back fo a chicken's ass! It WILL be fixed!" Mrs. Naara replied holding up a blow dryer in one hand and a comb and gel bottle in the other hand.
"M- Mrs. Naara... my hair's always been like this... nothing can change that. Not even hair gel... or anything. So there's n-no need to try... is there?" Sasuke explained, trying desperately to not say what he was thinking about the psycho woman.
Mrs. Naara sighed. "Fine. If you say so Sasuke. But I'm only doing this because the party's in a half an hour and you don't want to be late for your own party now do you, Sasuke-kun?"
"I guess not."
"Okay then. Get going now! I hear the girls have a special surprise for you when you get there." Shikamaru's mom said, rushing the guys out of the house.
"Uchiha! You were stuttering like Hinata-chan man. What's the matter with you?" Naruto asked tugging at the tux he was wearing.
"I didn't want to have my ass kicked by Shikamaru's mom! And I'm not hitting a girl unless she intends to kill me or I'm sparring with her. Anything else you gotta say, Dobe?" Sasuke replied.
"I wonder what your mom what talking about when she said the girls had a surprise for us." Neji said.
"I don't know. She never mentioned anything to me." Shikamaru said, shoving his hands in his pockets.
They arrived at the Hyuuga mansion about fifteen minutes after leaving Shikamaru's house. "Where are the girls at?" Naruto asked, cupping his hands around his eyes.
"You just want to look at Hinata's -" Shikamaru was cut off by Neji's deathly growl.
"He lays a hand on my cousin, he's a dead man." Neji replied, venom dripping from the words he said.
"Relax, I'm not gonna do that to Hinata... yet." Naruto's eyes widened as Neji pounced at Konoha's jinchuuriki.
Before Neji could reach the blonde, the arms of Sasuke and Shikamaru had stopped him. "He was fooling around, Hyuuga, as always." Sasuke said, restraining the Byakugan holder.
"Yeah Neji. He was just pushing your buttons. Calm down." Shikamaru replied.
Eventually, Neji calmed down and was release as more people mostly, other ninja started pouring in. "Shit, it's been an hour and still no heads or talks of the girls." Neji said. "Hey Shikamaru, why don't you call Ino to see where she's at?"
Shikamaru whipped out his phone and dialed Ino's cell phone number.
With the girls
"Ino! Your cell phone is ringing!" Sakura said, looking at the phone on the dresser.
"Let the answering machine get it! I'm busy fixing something!" Ino said, messing with her hair.
Back with the guys
"She didn't answer." Shikamaru said bluntly.
Naruto who had been in a deep thought, randomly said, "I didn't know the girls had tails!"
"You're hopeless Uzumaki." The boys turned to see Gaara in all of his Kazekage glory, with arms crossed. "It's been a while, Uchiha. The red head said, turning his attention to Sasuke.
"It has been." The Uchiha replied.
"You destroyed half of my village." Gaara stated grimly.
"Did I? I wasn't aware that was your village. I'm terribly sorry, about that. I'll have to call up Orochimaru and ask if he can fix what his orders told me to do." Sasuke smirked, folding his arms across his chest.
Gaara rolled his eyes. "Hey, Gaara, did you see the girls by chance?" Naruto asked.
"Temari said she was going to go find them." Gaara replied. At that moment, the lights dimmed, and some weird announcer guy came on stage.
"Ladies and gentleman, it is my proud honor, to bring you, the kunoichi's of Konoha!"
Ino, Sakura, Hinata, and TenTen imerged, clad in their kimonos. Ino's was purple with a white cosmos pattern. Sakura's was
pink, with orange tigers on it. Hinata's was blue with purple violets. TenTen's was green with a kunai pattern on it.
The song started. The song was Butterly. They all did a graceful ballet-like dance. The song ended and silence ensued as the girls faced the back of the stage. The girls let the kimonos fall off of their shoulders and down to the floor as the next song started. This dance was more stripper-like than ballet-like. Out in the audience, the boys' jaws dropped to the floor. The song ended and the girls came off stage giggling at the boys' expressions.
"Did the girls... just do a... strip tease?" Shikamaru stuttered.
"Hinata... chan..." Naruto passed out on the floor blood flowing from his nose.
"Why would they do something like this?" Neji pondered, TenTen's half naked body burned into his mind.
Sasuke's eyes twitched and his cheeks were flushed. "Oh.. my... god..."
"Uchiha, turn off your Sharingan." Neji said turning his attention to the Sharingan holder. It was only then that Sasuke felt the chakra going to his eyes.
"What the hell?" Sasuke asked him self.
"OMG! The teme was trying to look through Sakura-chan's skimpy shirt!" Naruto exclaimed, pointing the finger of Doom in Sasuke's general direction.
"Dobe. I was not!"
"Or were you?" The boys turned to see the girls behind them.
Sasuke blushed harder.
"Uchiha's blushing! Guess he is human after all!" Gaara said.
"Shut up Gaara!" Temari said, hitting her little brother over the head.
They spent the next few hours talking about random things. In fact Sasuke was so into ignoring all of the welcome back's he recieved from fan girls that no one noticed Naruto dissapere.
"Hey, everyone, attention! Listen up! Hey!" Naruto sweat droped.
"QUIET!" Everyone turned to look at Sakura.
"Thank you! Okay, now apparently, we all know that Sasuke-teme's back so as a welcome home we planned, very quickly, I might add, this party. Yeah, I'm getting tired of talking all fancy so long story short, welcome back Sasuke. We missed yah, glad you came to your senses and returned to the place to belong, and yadah, yadah, yadah. Oh yeah I forgot to mention, the arrival of Uchiha Naruto is soon! Yeah, last night I left Sasuke at Sakura-chan's and -"
"NARUTO! NOTHING HAPPENED I'M NOT PREGNANT YOU DUMB ASS!" Sakura said, fire burning in her eyes, ready to kill.
"Dobe, I'm gonna kill you!" Sasuke said as Sakura ran bare foot to the stage to kick Naruto's ass.
Shikamaru gave a questioning look. "Didn't she have shoes on before?"
"Yeah, she did, but we all know, forehead would trip and make a face plant if she ran with stilletoes on." Ino replied, while everyone burst out in a fit of laughter at the scene unfolding before them.
Soon after everything calmed down people started to leave. Everyone dispersed except the girls and the guys. "Hinata, I'm gonna go home. Its late and I'm tired." Naruto said.
"Oh, no you're not blondie! We planned a sleep over here so you're staying!" Ino said.
"Who are you calling blondie, blondie? Fine. Can I still go to sleep?" Naruto asked.
"NO!"
