Thanks again for the reviews, glad you guys liked that last addition!
On a side note, I've mostly been focusing on a barely functioning Vocaloid household, but for future reference, how would you guys feel if the one shots started taking on other settings? High school, workplaces, etc. Please lemme know in a PM or a review what you guys think. :D
Oh yeah, to LukaFan, not to worry, my Vocaloid song collection has long since increased in size. XD It was just that for a really long time, I only had Double Lariat and Melt. It's taken off from there, mostly because I just went nuts on Luka's voice. *fanboy moment*
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing... It'd be nice if that would change, but 'tis my sad reality.
Title: Caught!
Summary: "I just saw something nice~ And now I must go tell everyone~~~"
"So hungry..." Lily whined, padding her way down the stairs.
Despite the fact that it was well into the afternoon, she had woken up only a few minutes ago, mostly due to the angle of the sun finally hitting a point where there was absolutely no escape from its rays. After somehow managing to navigate the jungle that passed for her room, she had exited out into the hall and proceeded down the stairs in hopes of scoring some food. The house was strangely empty today, but then she remembered the kids (as she liked to call the younger members) were all at school. Gakupo apparently had some friend to meet up with today, and if she recalled correctly, Kaito and Meiko had gone out somewhere together. Luka was the only one she knew would be home, but her door was closed, so it was possible she was taking a nap or something.
This left Lily to fend for herself, but that was alright. She wasn't really feeling up to cooking an actual meal at the moment, but then, that was why the Vocaloids always kept the pantry stocked for just such moments. Once at the kitchen, she made a beeline for the pantry and opened the door, already wondering whether she wanted cup ramen, or instant yakisoba or...
...or dust.
She stared at the void that was the kitchen pantry, the shock taking a few minutes for her to process. Once it had sunk in, she hung her head in dejection.
Damn... Well... she thought. That's okay. I can just get by on snacks.
She glanced over at where they kept their snacks... finding it just as bare. Lily's eye ticked. She checked her last resort. One of the tallest shelves in the kitchen held a small stash where she reserved a few snacks for later use. She'd been dipping into that stash a bit more often than necessary, but there was at least a big bag of potato chips that she could crunch on until it was time for a proper meal. But looking inside the shelf showed her prize to be missing. She stared, her face blank with shock before her eyes narrowed with unwelcome realization.
Ah yes... she'd thought that big bag of chips the twins had been scarfing down last night had looked familiar... She slapped a hand over her face in frustration, grumbling and swearing under her breath and wondering why she hadn't considered this possibility. While easily the two shortest members of the household, the Kagamine twins typically compensated for this by working as a team... and no one in the house was taller than Rin riding Len's shoulders...
Lily snarled under her breath. Those two were so going to pay for this... Next time they went grocery shopping, she was going to conveniently forget to buy oranges and bananas... Oh, she could imagine the looks on their faces already-
Lily's sinister chuckling was cut short as she realized that her vile plans would never come to fruition. Reality check reminded her that it was simply an impossibility, because if there was one Vocaloid who was always present for those trips, it was Megurine Luka, who never forgot to buy things that anyone liked (except for sake, much to Lily and Meiko's mutual disappointment and frustration). In addition, while Luka generally kept an iron-fisted dominion over the budget on these trips, she could be easily swayed by cuteness. Even if the stars aligned, Luka actually forgot to buy stuff for the twins, and Lily's diabolical plan were to succeed, as soon as the twins saw that there was none of their favorite fruits, they would begin to whine and cry until they got their way (Crocodile tears! Lily would think vehemently anytime they used that tactic. Crocodile tears, all of it!).
And while Lily would have sat there and laughed in their faces at their allegations of child abuse and various human rights violations, Luka, softie that she was, would have sprinted out the door and not returned until she had brought back immense stockpiles of each fruit.
She knew this for a fact. Kaito had tried that just once on them as a prank, and not only had Luka buckled in 2.37 seconds (which was her longest period of resistance against such an assault), but Meiko had also beaten him up for making the twins cry, with Miku, Gakupo and Gumi just sitting on the sidelines and egging her on.
Why such evil, manipulative beings were allowed to possess such cute forms, Lily would never know.
So now with her chances for revenge also shut down, Lily felt even more miserable. More importantly, as her stomach grouchily reminded her, she was still hungry. She looked in the fridge to see if they had anything she could make a simple dish with, but that effort too proved fruitless, as the refrigerator was cleaned out. Lily sighed. She hadn't even been awake for fifteen minutes and today was already crappy. Well, there was no choice... Even though it was a bit of a pain, she didn't have any option left but to go to the convenience store and-
A stricken expression crossed her face before she facepalmed. She'd forgotten she'd blown the last of her money for the month already! Stupid booze and games... and strip clubs... and... stupid other things... Above all, she thought ruefully, stupid her for spending so much all the time. No wonder their manager had made her the only one on an allowance system...
Lily sighed. There was no helping it. Between her pride and her hunger, her pride was far less important, so now it was time to go to Luka with her proverbial hat in hand and beg for some money for food... She cursed the fact that Meiko wasn't around, because when smashed, Meiko would throw cash at pretty much anything within range that would do a little striptease (Lily had used it to her advantage on numerous occasions when she was "supposed" to buy the next round of drinks). Luka, however, was not amused with such antics, and she likely would have gotten the business end of a tuna for her trouble (and her body ached with remembered pains at this thought). Lily was still thinking thoughts like these when she timidly knocked on Luka's door.
"Oi, Luka? Um..."
She fidgeted as she opened the door, partly from nervousness since Luka was notoriously stingy when it came to her money (although when she thought about it, that only applied when Lily was the one asking for money...), but also partly for calculated effect. She'd practiced the whimpering, tearful look the Kagamine twins would give people when they wanted their way, and she figured it should earn her some brownie points... She could be cute too if she wanted to be!
"H-Hey, Luka? I was just wondering-"
"Oh my God!"
Lily's actually rather accurate imitation of the Kagamine mask of supreme manipulation was stricken from her face as soon as she saw the occupant within. Inside was Luka alright... but instead of her normal clothes or any casual wear, she was decked out in a pink nurse uniform, complete with a pink hat. The skirt was scandalously short, and offering a generous view of her killer legs decked out in black stockings (somewhere in the background was an enthusiastic howl of "OH YEAH!"), and if she moved said killer legs the wrong way, would end up offering a generous view up her skirt. To top off the look, Nurse Luka even came complete with a syringe that she held in her right hand, and glasses.
Luka stared back at Lily with a face as red as a tomato and turquoise eyes that looked like they would not be out of place on a deer in the headlights of an oncoming truck full of trucks being driven by Optimus Prime.
Lily stared blankly, put into shock by what she was seeing.
"Um... Luka... you..."
"N-Now I know what this looks like..." Luka stammered, trying unsuccessfully to cover herself.
Lily's expression remained blank with shock. But slowly, her face became a wide Cheshire Cat grin that made Luka break out into a nervous sweat. In a cheerful voice, Lily said, "Oh, it seems you're busy right now, Luka, so... I'll check on you later~"
She closed the door and began to skip off, but Luka stared after her, as if she could see her through the door. A sudden realization gripped her guts in icy clutches, for it was a well-known fact that Lily could not keep her mouth shut about anything...
"Lily? Lily! Lily, come back here!" she called, panic rising with each word. The door slammed open as she gave chase.
Gakupo sighed as he opened the door to the Vocaloid house. What a day... First he'd woken up late, remembering he had an appointment today to meet a friend... then it had all been downhill from there. He'd rushed off to the train station, forgotten his wallet and his cell phone, ran back to the house, grabbed said items and tried to call on the way, only to find he'd forgotten to charge his phone the night before and watched his phone give him the electronic version of the middle finger before it shut down... And then he'd found a payphone, but needed to break a bill into coins, since all he had were bills... then he'd forgotten his friend's number... The train had been running late, so he made a dash for the place they agreed to meet up at, but found it crowded... so he'd gone over to a convenience store, purchased a charger, and charged his phone just enough to be able to use the damn thing...
Only to find a text from his friend from earlier that morning saying, "Sorry, something urgent came up! ^_^; Maybe next time!"
He sighed again unhappily, hanging his head. What a day indeed... All he wanted to do now was just go to his room and pretend today had never happened... After all, what more could possibly go wrong?
Gakupo looked up just in time to dodge Lily prancing past him, looking so much happier than he could ever recall seeing her before. Sourly, he grumbled under his breath, "At least someone's having a good day..."
He faced forward again, seeing... His eyes widened. "Uh..."
The nurse who had been charging down the stairs returned a frozen stare at him, her expression the definition of panic itself.
"L...Luka...?" Gakupo asked hesitantly.
"IYAAAAAA!" Luka shrieked in a very un-Luka-like manner. She charged at him in a way that made his body's panic sensors go into overdrive.
"Gah! Um...! Er...!" he tried to think quickly, because she was getting closer and this did not bode well for him at all. Offering what he hoped to be a kind smile (actually, it looked more like an "oh shit, I'm so screwed" expression), he said, "Aha... Luka, that nurse outfit looks great on y-"
Completely ignoring him, Luka screamed, her voice gaining an ominous echo, "FORGET WHAT YOU SAW! JAPANESE NINJA NUMBER ONE SKILL: DOUBLE LARIAT NO JUTSU (SEXY NURSE VERSION)!"
The last thing Gakupo saw before he was launched screaming through the open doorway and soaring through the sky was a technique legends had only spoken of. For a brief moment, he was caught by the whirling grace and power behind the beautifully executed attack. The spinning had also made her skirt fly up, but he had no time to even think to take a peek before the strike landed, which began his involuntary journey out the door and into the great sky above.
Seeing how the only other witness was hightailing it from the scene, her long blonde hair fluttering behind her, the secrets behind this devastating skill remained safe once more.
Miku, Neru, and Gumi had been on their way back from school and just about to turn the corner to get to the walkway that led up to the Vocaloid house when they were nearly plowed over by a fleeing Lily, who singsonged at the top of her lungs, "I just saw something nice~ And now I must go tell everyone~~~"
Miku and Gumi stared after her in bewilderment. "Uhhhhhh..." Gumi said, raising an eyebrow. "What was that all about?"
Neru had not looked up from her phone, still punching in keys at a mind-boggling speed as she commented absently, "Probably just her being an idiot again."
The two other girls were about to shrug and resume walking when suddenly a nurse in a very sexy pink uniform and black stockings (an outfit Gumi and Miku both recognized to be straight out of one of Gumi's hentai mangas) ran out onto the sidewalk, her shoes screeching against the concrete before zooming off in the direction Lily had fled, her pink hair fluttering behind her as she screamed, "Lily! Lily, let's talk about this! Please? Lily, are you listening to me? Lily!"
The dust slowly settled in her wake, revealing three girls staring after her, eyes wide. The green-haired girl and her teal-haired companion were both flushed bright red, and streams of blood had started spilling from their noses.
"Whoa..." Gumi whispered, her voice husky with awe. "That... was so totally awesome..."
"Ehehe..." Miku's laugh and accompanying grin were not unlike those of a perverted old man, a small trickle of drool starting at the corner of her mouth. "Black lace... Oh yeah... My favorite..."
Neru's expression was the same as the two other girls, sans nosebleeds. She held up her phone. Instead of massive lines of abusive texting and legions of emotes on the screen like usual, there was instead a perfect image of Luka, her expression of panic, arms flailing ("Wow... Glasses... And a syringe too...? She's really into this cosplay..." Gumi said in an awed whisper.) and a very nice upskirt shot showing a generous amount of sexy black lace.
Neru handed Miku her handkerchief as the latter's nosebleed worsened. The teal-haired girl accepted and clutched the cloth to her nose without breaking her fixated stare on the picture.
"Neru," Miku said, seemingly hypnotized. "You gotta send this to my phone."
"Mine too," Gumi added, just as hypnotized.
Not one to miss an opportunity, Neru said, unable to tear her eyes away either. "Six pictures of Len. Each."
"Two," they chorused in perfect unison.
"Five."
"Three."
"Four."
"Deal."
Somewhere at a park downtown, about twenty minutes from the train station nearest to the Vocaloid house and a short walk from a busy firm, Honne Dell was having a smoke break. Ordinarily, he would just gaze off into nothing as he stood by himself under the shade of his favorite tree, but today, there was something new to look at.
A purple-haired samurai lay suspended in the tree above the one Dell was standing beneath, held up by the lone branch that had not shattered during his unceremonious, screaming descent. He took a drag before exhaling, red eyes still fixed on the sight with as much curiosity as his sullen expression could muster (which really did not look like much). He recognized the man at least: Kamui Gakupo from the Vocaloid household. He'd met him on a few occasions, though Dell did not visit the house as often as Haku did. Work called, after all.
He ignored the other people staring up at the injured man, bruised and battered and looking in a very altogether unpleasant state.
"So," Dell began before taking another drag. He wasn't any good at this "taking care of people" crap... "Um... how's it hanging?"
Realizing what he'd said, he slapped a hand over his forehead. "Sorry... That totally came out wrong."
Weakly, Gakupo groaned.
"Medic..."
Fin
Omake
"Kinda rare for Luka to skip out on a grocery shopping trip, isn't it?" Kaito asked, absently tossing a small bag full of oranges into their shopping cart.
"Yeah," Meiko admitted. "But... well, she said something about practicing for a new song. You know how dedicated that girl can be."
"Mm."
They lapsed into a comfortable silence, shopping around for other groceries the house needed in the fresh foods section. Neither knew how the hell they had all been so careless as to allow their food supply to drop to zero in a house that was essentially full of gluttons (Luka had perhaps the most normal eating habits, but also the most expensive... buying high quality tuna sushi for her had cost more like two arms and a leg...), but it happened occasionally, they supposed.
Something out of the corner of his eye caught Kaito's attention. He blinked. "Ne, Mei-chan, isn't that Miki-chan?"
"Hm?" Meiko raised her head to look in the direction the blue-haired man had nodded towards and saw Furukawa Miki, apparently doing her own grocery shopping. Upon recognizing her, her face lit up. "Oh, it is!" She called out to the redhead girl, "Hi, Miki-chan!"
No response. Instead, the girl was staring straight ahead of herself, apparently deaf.
The two blinked and looked at each other. They walked up to her and moved their heads to look at her face. The girl was sporting a traumatized expression, her lips moving in short, convulsive movements, eyes wide and glassy. Her ahoge was crooked, trembling slightly with her quivering body. Kaito blinked and waved a hand in front of her face.
"Miki-chan? Hello? Earth to Miki-chan?"
No reaction.
Again the two adults looked at each other. They followed Miki's gaze to what she was staring at.
Meiko blinked twice in confusion. "Does... she not like leeks?"
Kaito shrugged. "Never heard of anyone who hated leeks so much they were traumatized by them..."
"I'm sorry..." Miki muttered fearfully, apparently talking to no one in particular. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."
Kaito and Meiko looked at each other and then back at Miki, who was lost in her own terrifying world...
A vise-like grip landed on her shoulder as she exited the house. Gasping with alarm, Miki whirled.
"M-Miku-chan?" she asked. It could have just been the darkness of night, but the teal-haired girl seemed so very threatening, a malevolent miasma of menace surrounding her. Instead of her usual shirt, skirt, and tie, she wore a simple gray kimono. Her bangs concealed all of her face in shadow save for her mouth.
The mouth was curled into a terrifying smile.
"Miki-chan..." Miku said in a low, twisted version of her normally sweet, melodic voice. "I'm sorry..."
"H-Huh...?" Her ahoge quivered with fright. She winced as the teal-haired demon's grip tightened. "M-M-Miku-chan...! Y-You're hurting me...!"
"I'm sorry, Miki-chan..." Miku rasped, apparently not hearing her as she began to chuckle darkly. "I was going to let you go... It's really not your fault..."
She looked up, revealing an insane, sadistic gleam in her eyes. "But I guess I just can't..."
Miki seized up with fear as Miku's free hand emerged from the darkness, revealing her hand tightly clutching a leek. She whimpered, terror visible in her gaze. "N-No... M-Miku-chan... Please...!"
Miku's only response was to chuckle sinisterly, her lips still set into a cruel smile. "Maybe if you say 'I'm sorry' a thousand times before I'm finished, I'll let you go~~~"
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."
The hand wielding the leek raised high over Miku's head, still fixing Miki's petrified eyes with psychotic ones. The chuckling grew into soft laughter.
"I'm sorry...! I'm sorry...! I'm sorry...!"
The leek began to descend on her...
"Ahahaha... AHAHAHA...! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Kaito scratched his head. "Well... we can't leave her here... Not like this anyway."
Meiko nodded her agreement. Easily, she lifted the girl onto the cart, still rigid as a board despite her trembling. Cold sweat trickled down her face, mixing with frightened tears as she whimpered again and again, "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry..."
Kaito and Meiko sweatdropped simultaneously.
Someone needs therapy...
Omake Fin
This just completely flew out of control after a while as I was writing it. XDDD And yes, I had a bit too much fun with this one too. I had to do a coin flip on Nurse Luka vs. Maid Luka (I was going to pick an anime character, but decided against it ultimately; figured it'd be better to pick something a bit more generic), and as you can see, Nurse Luka won.
Regarding the omake, I thought I'd give a teeny bit of a glimpse of what poor Miki-chan went through in chapter 3, but I didn't think it was strong enough to stand on its own. I made Miku go full-on Higurashi on her, and I hope it's still funny. Didn't wanna make Miku too scary, though I don't think I did (then again, I've seen enough Vocaloid horror stuff to be afraid of any of them in yandere mode x_X).
Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I liked writing it! Toss me a review and let me know what you think! 'Til next time! ^_^
