The days past uneventfully, Jake continued to talk about his trip to Hollyoaks. He talked about his mate and how he broke his leg. He talked about a new drink that he loves called a blowjob. I think he just threw that in to make me blush. He talked about everything that happened that weekend and I was thoroughly convinced that he never came into contact with anyone from my past.
We were both hanging out at the club a couple weeks later, when he gets a text. He grabs his phone and smiles. I don't think anything of it until he comes up to me and grabs my hands.
"Baby" He uses his sweet voice which indicates that he is about to tell me something I'm not going to like.
"Yeah, what is it."
"Now I don't want you to get mad…" He pauses. I hate when he does this. Like postponing what he has to tell me will somehow soften the blow.
"What Jake, spit it out"
"…I kind of invited someone to stay with us for a few days."
I let out an exasperated grunt. "Dammit Jake, you know I hate when you do that." He has a tendency to bring home the strays and waifs. I find it incredibly annoying and endearing at the same time. It shows me what a big heart he has but the last one he let stay with us stole our t.v, my laptop and my ipod. "No way Jake, call him back and tell him to get a hotel or something, he can't st…"
He shushes me. "Be quiet, here he comes now." I turn to see what type of riff raff Jake has let into our flat.
X/X
You know that moment when you feel like the floor has been taken out from underneath you and you are just about to fall and you look down and see nothing except a black hole and you don't now how long it is, but you know that eventually you will plummet to your death. That is how I felt when I turn around and saw 'him'…Brendan Brady in the flesh. I lock eyes with him for a second and turn around quickly to divert his stare. Jake shuffles past me excitedly and goes to great him.
"Hiya Brendan, how are you? I hope you didn't have trouble finding the place."
"No…no." I am still turned away from them when I hear Jake start to introduce me.
"This is my boyfr…" Shit! They are both staring at me now. I can feel it. "Ste…STE…what the hell." I close my eyes, hoping that it will all go away. I feel a hand grip my shoulder and turn me around. "What the hell is wrong with you?" My boyfriend whispers in my ear. "Ste…this is Brendan Brady, he owns ChezChez, the club I was telling you about."
"Hello Stephan, nice to meet ye." He sticks out his hand indicating for me to shake it. I keep my eyes downcast and shake his hand hesitantly. I know my boyfriend must think I'm nuts right now but I just can't look at him. It's Obvious that Brendan hasn't told him about us and I don't want to give anything away.
"I'll get us some drinks then shall I." Jake saunters to the other side of the bar leaving Brendan and me on our own.
I finally look up.
"So this is where yeh've been hiding this whole time, eh" He say's mockingly. He is trying to take a dig at where I work.
"What are you playing at, Brendan." I don't bother with his games. I just need to know why he is here.
"I don't know what you mean Stephan, Jake invited me to stay with yis while I check out a few clubs in Chester." He flashes his teeth when he says this because he knows that I am starting to panic a bit.
"Well you can't stay with us." I spit out.
"Oh…so yehr gonna tell yehr boyfriend about us then, is that it." He smiles in a way that means he already knows the answer to that question.
Jake finally comes back with our drinks and relaxes a bit when he sees that I am at least looking at Brendan now.
"Thanks Jake, such hospitality, I bet he makes a wonderful boyfriend, eh, Stephan." His voice is thick with sarcasm. Of course Jake doesn't notice because he is hanging on his every word. I should be jealous but all I can feel at the moment it utter horror.
"So Brendan, if you own your own club, why is it that you can't spring for a nice hotel?" Jake looks at me with shock. I know I am being rude but he just doesn't understand. Brendan can't stay with us. I can't have him so close to me, it will ruin everything I have worked so hard for.
"Well young Stephan, owning a club is a lonely business, when Jake here invited me to stay with yis, I was grateful for the company." He looks over a Jake and smiles. I want to vomit because I can't say anything now. If I deny him a place to stay it makes me out to be an awful person. He has got the upper hand now.
"Yeah fine…fine, you can stay." I say with disdain.
"Right, I'll go get another round then."
X/X/X
Several beers later and I still feel like I'm going to explode. Brendan is being his funny charming self, which he usually is when he is scamming someone. In this case, it is my boyfriend. Jake is laughing at all his jokes, listening intently as he talks about the club and turning red every time Brendan looks in his direction. I had almost forgotten how good he was a manipulating people.
I haven't said more than two words the whole time they have been talking. He directs his next question towards me.
"So Stephan, where did ye live before ye moved here, Jake here doesn't seem to know." I feel a twinge of panic at his question. Why is he bringing this up? He must know I didn't tell Jake.
"Oh you know, here and there." I answer vaguely.
Jake chimes in giving his standard answer when people ask questions about me. "Ste doesn't really talk about that stuff."
"Oh, yeh've got something to hide Stephan." He laughs as if he's just told the funniest joke. I of course doesn't find this funny.
"No, I just don't tell complete strangers my whole life story." I glance over at Jake who can see that I am uncomfortable.
He tries to defend me the best way he knows how. "Yeah, Ste will tell me when he's ready"
But Brendan just keeps pushing the issue. "So yehr not even curious as to why he won't tell you, what did ye leave a boyfriend back home or something."
"Nobody worth mentioning." I see his cheek twitch. I smile because I have struck a nerve.
I turn the tables back on him. "What about you Brendan, any boyfriend or girlfriend for you?"
"Well there was this one bloke." I am stunned into silence. He's not talking about me. Surely he's not talking about me.
Jake finally gets interested in the conversation. He has always been apt to listen to a bit of gossip. "Oh really, what happened there."
"He left me." He says blankly.
"Why?" Jake asks.
"Yeah why, what did you do?" He looks over at me finally and almost looks sad.
He doesn't say anything for a while. It's as if he is contemplating his next move. But I don't care either way, he is my past and I want nothing to do with him in my future.
He looks my square in the eyes, unblinking and says, "I treated him really badly."
Really, is that it, really? Is all he could muster up? How about you beat me so severely that I ended up in the hospital. Or that you made me feel as though I was nothing. Or even that you are sorry for what you did.
I am done with conversation now. I walk away towards the backroom of the club. Jake in no doubt wondering why I left a conversation midway through but I can't do this. I can't sit here listening to him talk about us, or to be more specific the lack of us.
What does he want? Is he here to get me back? Is he here to make my life miserable? Does he not see that I am perfectly content without him? I hear the door open to the backroom and brace myself for an argument with Jake.
Only it isn't Jake, Brendan comes behind me and places his hands on my hips. I feel the electricity radiate through my body from his touch. It is something I haven't felt in a long time. When I finally come back to reality I turn around and push him of me.
I back into the corner of the room. "What do you want Brendan."
He takes a step forward towards me. "I just needed to see you." His voice is low now so that I can barely hear him.
"Why?" I ask boldly.
"I just had to." He takes another step towards me and stops just shy of me. He reaches out his hand to cup my face.
I push his hand away. "Well you saw me, now leave me the hell alone."
"I can't…" He says in his low Irish drawl. "Stephan…I'm sor…I want…come back with me."
"You have got to be kidding me." I shake my head in disbelief. I would laugh in his face if I didn't find the situation completely sickening.
"I promise I will…" I cut him off there.
"Don't Brendan, don't promise me anything because it will all be lies…it's always lies." The tick is back and he is becoming increasingly angry.
"Stephan, please…what are ye even doing here? With that guy? There is no way that ye love him."
"Don't you dare tell me who I love, you don't get to tell me anything anymore." He loses it at that very moment. I see his eyes open widely at me.
"Fine…just fine." He waves his hands at me frantically and I am once again faced with the debilitating fear of being beaten by Brendan Brady. I cover my face and cower in the corner, tears streaming down my cheeks.
I hear the door open and Jake runs over to me.
"What did you do to him?" He screams at Brendan.
"I don't know what happened we were just talking and then he just started freaking out." I continue to shake uncontrollably.
Jake looks between the two of us suspiciously. "Is that what happened Baby?"
Brendan eyes me nervously. I am faced with two choices. I either lie about Brendan and what we are to each other or I don't. I go for the lie.
"Yeah, that's what happened." I say undecidedly. I can't tell Jake about Brendan and I. He will never understand why I would stay with someone like that.
"Okay, well let's get you home then." He lifts me up and puts his arm around my waist. He turns to face Brendan, "You coming?"
