To everyone who gave me advice, I appreciate it. Just keep letting me know about things I can do better. The dream sequence is extremely jargon-heavy, so if you've got a question about what one of the words means, just ask.
It seemed like an eternity, but the group finally entered the town. With a singleminded determination to finally get some fucking sleep, Nicholas trudged wearily over to what Petal Drops told him was a clinic. Nick rapped on the door with his knuckles. The lights were out, but hopefully they'd have a night shift that hadn't fallen asleep on his post. Ever the cynic, He doubted that strongly.
Silence. Big suprise.
"Are you fuckin' serious?"
*BAM* *BAM* *BAM* He hammered on the door with his fist. Finally, the door opened.
Nurse Redheart wiped the sleep out of her eyes as she opened the door. *YAWN* "What's the problem he-" One glance at the visitor silenced her. A tall bipedal creature with a very short black mane, and (in her opinion) evil black eyes stared down at her. Thrown over his shoulder was a small white filly with a yellow mane. Her olive green eyes were glassy and half-closed. Nurse Redheart stepped away from the open door in horror. "What...What did you do?"
The irate human rolled his eyes at the presumption that he was responsible. "I saved her life. And now you're gonna take care of her, because I'm tired. Also, the blue pony behind me will be covering any medical expenses." He turned around glaring fiercely at the distraught blue pony. "Won't you?" A soundless nod was her response. The knowledge that the two-legged creature, however rude he was, had not brutalized the poor filly put Nurse Redheart somewhat at ease.
"Ah...Well...We have a room in the back. I suppose we'll leave her there until we begin her examination." Nurse Redheart pulled out a small clipboard and a pencil. "What did you say her name was?"
Petal Drops finally broke her silence. "Lemon Brittle...And she's my best friend, so I'd really like to stay here with her."
Nurse Redheart spoke softly to the anxious pony. "I promise, you can stay with her. But right now, we need information so that we can treat her. Can you help me with that?"
Petal nodded morosely. "Good, now then, ah..Mister...is it?"
"Yeah, call me Nick."
"Okay then, Nick. Would you please bring Lemon Brittle to the bed back here. Thanks" The nurse turned back to Petal Drops. "Let's go have a seat and fill out these papers." At that, the two ponies headed towards what looked like a small administrative office. Nicholas sighed as he walked down the hall toward the empty room. He opened the door, and walked in. There was a small cot, perfectly sized for a pony. Not perfectly sized for him.
"They better have REAL beds at this inn you were talking about." He grumbled at the unconscious form of Lemon Brittle. He set her in the bed, and pulled the sheets over her. He walked towards the door, fully intending to leave. Something stopped him, and he looked back at the filly.
Nick hadn't really noticed before how sickly the little pony looked. Now, the dim candlelight only exacerbated how ill she looked. A remnant of his humanity tugged at his heartstrings. Slowly, he walked over to Lemon Brittle and tentatively put his hand on her head. He stroked her mane softly. "You better not die on me, little buddy. I don't have enough friends to replace you" He laughed softly at his joke. The smile faded from his face. He felt uncomfortable about leaving the little filly here alone. Granted, Petal Drops would be staying as well, but he didn't trust the helpless pony's security to her little friend.
Nick briskly walked out of the door into an adjacent room. There was a pile of linen stacked neatly on a desk. Nick grabbed four sheets and a blanket and strode back into Lemon Brittle's room. Setting the four sheets on the ground in a rough imitation of a pillow, he laid his head on the sheets and pulled the blanket over him. It wasn't the worst place he'd ever slept, and the sheer weight of his exhaustion finally began to fall over him.
Nicholas was asleep in 5 minutes.
XXX
"Shut the fuck up, Dawson."
"Naw, nigga! Fuck you! You done got the Chicken Feta MRE for the last 2 weeks! Tha's some bullshit right there!"
Hawkins laughed at the argument and threw in his two-cents.
"Ahaha! You would want the fuckin' chicken, Dawson!"
Dawson grinned crazily at the third party, and put on his best fake-slave accent. "Shee-it massah! You'sa knows us darkies loves them chick'ns!"
Nick doubled over with laughter. Finally, in between chuckles: "Shut the fuck up, man! Here just take it! Don't make me laugh that hard again, though. That hurt." He tossed the off-pink plastic bag over to Dawson. The Marine snatched it out of middair. "My nigga."
Nick sat up. "Hey, throw me that MRE box."
Walle kicked it over. "You know there's nothing good in there, right?"
"Whatever, dude. They all suck. It's just varying degrees of suck."
"Like your wife?"
Nick glared at him...Finally letting an indifferent grin take over his features.
"Yeah, just like her. No point gettin' jealous though. I guess I could let you have my sloppy seconds. Y'know, seeing as how she's already mothering one of my children"
Walle grinned somewhat apologetically. "You get to see your kid yet?"
"Nah, dude. If the computers at the MWR had webcams, we could do something like that next time we were in the COP."
"Shit's weak man."
"Yup."
A tall figure exited the MATV with a handheld PRC-152 in his hand. Judging from the look on his face, shit was about to get retarded.
"Roger, we'll set it up. One-actual out." He put the radio in his radio pouch on his flak shoulder strap and walked over to the two Lance Corporals who were sitting in the dust, throwing pebbles back and forth at each other.
Nick glanced up at him. "What's goin' on, sir?"
Lt. Gibson waited a moment before replying. "Ah, not too much. Just got word from Company, though. We're staying here. And they want us to set up a TCP here, too. So, we're gonna be here for a while."
Walle made a face and Nick rolled his eyes. "Awesome."
The Lieutenant thought for a second. He looked over at the Marine manning the lead vic turret. "How long's Diaz been on watch?'
"About 2 hours."
"You gonna go replace him soon, or what?"
Nick and Walle glanced at each other. Walle spoke up. "Maybe when he learns to keep his rifle clean. I watched that motherfucker for 3 days. He didn't clean his rifle ONCE."
Lt. Gibson nodded. "Fair enough. Just make sure you keep checking if he needs water."
"Good to go, sir"
A series of soft thumps was heard in the distance. Every single conversation stopped and a terrified silence replaced it. Nick felt his guts turn to ice.
"Do we have a mortar attachment?" Nicholas yelled.
"Negative!" barked the Lt.
The distinct whistling sound of an 82mm mortar appeared in the air above them.
"FUCK! GET TO COVER! FIND COVER! INCOMING!"
Nicholas flew to his feet grabbing his kevlar and throwing it atop his head. He sprinted toward a small shed just to the right of the column. The first explosion shattered the ground behind him. A wave of percussive passed over his body, making his ears buzz. Then the second...third...sixthseventheighth...
The world shuddered and burned and shook around him...and shook...and shook...
XXX
His eyes flew open. He felt a hoof on his shoulder, shaking him awake. A pair of pink eyes stared back into his. "Damnit, Petal!" The blue filly jumped back. "Sorry! I just wanted to see if you were ready for some food." Petal Drops held out a plate with what appeared to be hay on it. Nick smirked and looked at the filly.
"Is that...hay?"
She nodded.
"I don't eat...hay..."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
The blue pony thought for a moment. "Do you eat...cupcakes?"
Nick looked at her skeptically. "You mean, with sugar and flour and NOT hay?"
"Yeah."
"Uh..Sure."
Petal Drops grinned. "Then we can go to Sugarcube Corner! They make the BEST cakes and pastries. Mr. and Mrs. Cake know how to make some awesome treats."
Nicholas raised an eyebrow. " Is it seriously called 'Sugarcube Corner'? Really? Can I get a side of diabetes there, too?" Petal deadpanned, clearly not understanding what he meant.
"...I don't know what that is...I bet they could make it though."
Nicholas sighed resignedly. "They already do... Come on, let's go check it out."
Nick sat up stiffly and rubbed his neck. "Should've found a real pillow." he grumbled. Finally rising to his feet, he glanced over at the little white filly. Her eyes were closed, her breathing even. Nicholas felt a slight warmth in his chest, knowing that she was still breathing. Petal Drops looked at him. "I think she's kind of taken with you."
"Oh yeah? In case you haven't noticed, I'm not what you'd call a good person...er pony...or...whatever"
"Yeah, but you came out of -literally- nowhere and helped her find that last letter. You can't be all bad." Petal Drops smiled at her reasoning.
Nicholas looked vacantly at her, smiling darkly. "You have no idea..."
Somewhat unsettled, Petal Drops needled a little more. "What do you mean?"
Silence overtook the conversation. Best to leave a little seed of fear planted in her mind...Just in case he needed it. After a few seconds of loaded silence, Nick deliberately changed the subject.
"How 'bout those cupcakes?" He asked with a toothy grin. Petal seemed only too glad to drop the subject. Forcing a smile, she began to walk towards the small desk near the main entrance. "Sure, let's get going." Nicholas began to walk after her.
Nurse Tenderheart sat at the front desk, clearly bored with her post, judging from the stack of pony-romance novels under the desk. She looked up at the visitors. "We'll be back in a bit. My friend here hasn't had breakfast yet. So if you need us, we'll be at 'Sugarcube Corner'." The mare was clearly distracted by the...thing standing in front of her. Nicholas noticed. "Take a picture. It'll last longer." Clearly flustered by her lack of manners, she stammered an apology. "I-I'm sorry. I've just...never had a...guest...quite like you. I didn't...ah..."
"Yeah, I know." Nick turned and strode out the door. Petal looked sympathetically at the flustered mare. "Sorry, he's kinda cranky." The nurse nodded. "I see that...Well, if he rescued that poor filly, he can't be too much trouble."
Petal Drops gave the nurse a reassuring smile and turned to follow Nicholas. He hadn't gone far. He was staring at the rest of the town. "WOW...I can see you ponyfolk enjoy bright, garish colors. Lemme guess, Sugarcube corner is the gingerbread lookin' house on the corner."
"Yeah! How'd you know." This drew an irritated stare from Nick.
"I guessed."
"Cool! Let's go!" As they walked toward the corner, Petal yelped with a sudden realization. "OH! I totally forgot about Pinkie Pie. She's gonna want to throw you a party when she meets you."
"Not happening."
Petal smirked, drawing amusement from his irritation. "You don't have a choice."
"Hah. We'll see."
Petal's horn glowed and the door to Sugarcube corner opened. Behind the counter stood a cyan, motherly looking pony in an apron. Nick chuckled to himself. "First bitch I've seen in a while that knows her place." The though brought a grin to his face. The smile disarmed some of the apprehension visible in the mare's face.
"Hi, Mrs. Cake! This is my friend, Nicholas. He's new in town, and I told him about your cupcakes. Any chance we could give him a treat?"
Mrs. Cake looked at the strange creature with the short, black mane. He didn't seem too...strange. And he'd smiled when he came in! The cyan mare swallowed her apprehension and smiled warmly at the visitor.
"Hello, Nicholas. It would be my pleasure to treat you to some cupcakes. In fact, I believe Pinkie Pie just finished a batch." Mrs. Cake turned her head towards the kitchen. "Pinkie, dear! Could you bring that tray of cupcakes for our visitor?"
Nicholas' eyes widened at the mention of the dreaded party pony. "Ah, that's quite alright! I could come back later...You seem...ah...busy..." His eyes scanned the empty store. He mentally kicked himself.
Mrs. Cake looked at her only customer, clearly confused. "Er...It's no trouble at all..."
"I insist! In fact I'll-" *GASP*
Nick looked for the source of the gasp. His eyes settled on a grinning pink filly with a wild pink mane. "That's gotta be her."
Pinkie bounced over to Nicholas, somehow keeping the heaping tray of cupcakes atop her head. "I haven't seen you before! And If I haven't seen you before, that means I haven't invited you to a party before! WHICH MEANS THAT YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO A PINKIE PIE PARTY! WHICH GIVES A SUPER-FABULOUS-SPECTACULAR IDEA!"
She narrowed her eyes.
"I'm gonna throw you..."
"Oh, God. Why?" The poor contract killer groaned.
"A PARTY! WITH STREAMERS AND BALLOONS AND CAKE AND CANDY AND GAMES AND PUNCH AND PIN-THE-TAIL-ON-THE-PONY! DO YOU LIKE PIN THE TAIL ON THE PONY?" The pink pony looked about ready to explode with the self-satisfaction of being able to throw another party.
"Ah...Sure..."
Somehow, by telling the laws of physics to fuck off, Pinkie Pie appeared on his shoulder. "DID WE JUST BECOME BEST FRIENDS?"
"Wait , how did you-"
"YEAH WE DID!"
Nicholas was taken aback by the whole outburst from the bubbly filly.
"W-w-wait. When's this party?"
Pinkie Pie's smile became even bigger. "It's a surprise" she whispered.
Nick stood there in utter confusion. Abruptly, Pinkie Pie rammed a cupcake into his mouth. "HOW IS IT?" She implored, eyes wide.
He chewed for a second. "If no' bag."
Pinkie bounced in front of him. "Of course it's not a "bag", silly filly! But wait, you're not a filly! What are you?"
Petal Drops mercifully broke her silence. "He's a human, and...I think you've scarred him with this experience, Pinkie." At that, she shot a wicked grin at Nicholas. His eyes begged to leave this awful store and the horrific pony who had robbed him of his bearing by means of cupcakes and parties.
"Besides, we need to get back to the clinic. Lemon Brittle got hurt last night."
Pinkie stopped bouncing and wrapped up the blue filly in a vice-like hug. "Aww! I'm so sorry! We should totally combine the 'Welcome, Mr. hyoo-man' party with a 'Get Well Soon' party for Lemon Brittle!" The thought of a two-for-one party combo set the Pink earth pony bouncing ecstatically.
"Ah..Right...Well, we need to get back. Could we get a bag for the cupcakes?"
Pinkie bounced behind the counter, and reemerged with a pink paper bag. "This is a bag, Mr. Hyoo-man!" She said, waving it enthusiastically in his face.
"It's Nick. And thanks. Cool. Let's go, Petal Drops." He said, starting for the door.
Pinkie vigorously waved goodby to the customers "Thank for stopping by, hyoo-man Nick! 2/3 Golf leads the way! Er-ruh!"
Nick's eyes and jaw dropped open in sheer amazement. "WHAT DID YOU JUST-" *SLAM*
The door slammed shut in his face. Petal looked at Nick with a measure of confusion. "What's a 2/3 Golf?" Nick was beyond words at this point. How the fuck did that pink terror know his old unit.
Nick began to shuffle back to the clinic "Dude...I just give up on trying to understand this place..."
Petal Drops giggled. "Yup. That's Pinkie!"
