*Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Running on Fumes
Chapter 5
By: EJJCullen
I lay on my bed and cried. How did this happen? I went over the afternoon events in my head over and over again. I couldn't pin point how it had happened. I was so thirsty from crying that I went downstairs to grab a bottle of water. As I reached in the fridge and my fingers wrapped around the clear, plastic bottle it hit me. The water bottle! It was the only thing that made sense. Edward must have put something into my bottle of water! I remember him handing me the water bottle and practically daring me to drink more and more. It had been opened before he gave it to me. But what could he have put into it? A sleeping pill? Ruffies? My mind was spinning.
I couldn't exactly head down to Forks Medical to have my blood drawn and tested without having to explain to someone why I was doing it. Besides, Edward's father worked at the hospital, it would no doubt get back to him and lead to more and more questions. Then I thought back through all that had happened from the time I got to the Cullen's to the time I left. Edward and his father running into each other when we got to the Cullen's and then over hearing them talk on my way out. Somehow Edward's father was involved.
I took the bottle of water out of the fridge, downing it completely in one giant gulp. I could feel the cold liquid as it spread through my chest. I took the empty bottle out to the back of the house and dropped it into the recycling bin. On my way back into the house I glanced up at the Cullen's house which lead to another round of tears. Through blurry eyes I navigated my way back through the house and up to my bedroom where I once again crashed on my bed.
It was almost midnight when I heard Charlie's cruiser pull into the driveway. I had been crying since I left the Cullen's, and now I was a complete hiccupping mess. My eyes burned from the constant flow of tears, my head throbbed from being dehydrated and I did not want my dad to see me in this state.
I grabbed my bathrobe and ran to the bathroom to hide in the shower. I barely recognized myself in the mirror. It was just a zombie of myself that reflected back. My eyes were bloodshot and my face red from the constant stream of tears down my cheeks. I turned the water to the hottest setting and got in. Standing under the spray I did my best to remember the missing six hours spent in Edward's bedroom. My mind was blank. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't remember past Edward taking off my shoes.
"Hey Bells, I'm home." Charlie called from outside the bathroom door.
"Hi Dad." I called back, hoping my voice didn't give away my devastation.
"I'm beat, so I'm gonna head to bed. Love you kiddo."
"Love you too!"
I heard his retreating footsteps and closed my eyes as I let the hot water burn my skin. I was so numb at this point I couldn't feel the heat of the water as it turned my skin red. Eventually I washed my hair and body. As I moved the bar of soap around my body I wondered again what had happened and what places on my body had Edward touched. The water soon ran cold and I barely registered the difference. Looking at my pruning fingers I decided that enough was enough and turned the water off.
I wrapped myself in a towel, followed by my bathrobe and walked to my room. I turned off the lights and snuggled beneath my covers hoping to forget this day ever happened. I fell asleep quickly. My dreams played out like a movie. They consisted of random images interrupted by flashes of light.
Flash
A vision of me lying in a bed wearing my school uniform.
Flash
Same bed, but this time I was in my white, cotton bra with matching panties. My hair was a mess.
Flash
I'm awake and completely nude. My hands are behind my head in a relaxed position arching my chest out and smiling.
Flash
Someone's hands running up and down my body – massaging my chest, playing with my stomach, and easing my legs apart.
Flash
On the edge of the bed, legs spread wide, feet placed on the edge as someone's fingers slip in and out of my folds. I'm moaning, smiling, and moving my hips to meet their fingers.
Flash
Im kneeling in the middle of the bed, running my hands up and down my body, in my hair, and down to touch myself.
Flash
A burst of bronze hair.
Flash
"You're so beautiful, do you feel beautiful?" a familiar voice says.
"That's it, make yourself feel good, let me see you cum."
Flash
I look different, my eyes are dilated, my skin is flushed, and my smile shows satisfaction.
Flash
I'm on my knees on the floor; he's sitting, nude, on the edge of the bed.
"See something you like?" he teases.
Flash
I'm running my hands up and down his thighs; he's hard and ready for me.
Flash
I'm licking, sucking, and grazing his cock with my teeth. I hear him hiss and curse.
"God yes…harder…show me what a good girl you are…take it all…I wish I could see her face when she sees these…like mother, like daughter…"
Flash
He pulls my hair, thrusts into my mouth with wild abandon. Tears streak down my face.
"I knew you would like that…Ugh, swallow every ounce…"
I wake up in a panic, throwing a hand to my chest and gasping for air. Did that really happen? I look at the clock on my bedside table…three o'clock. Its dark out, the fog hangs in the air. I get out of bed and walk to the window that looks out onto the Cullen's property. Their house is dark, quiet.
With my mind made up I tie my hair back, pull on some black yoga pants, a black hooded sweatshirt and a pair of running shoes. With my hood up I creep from my room downstairs, out the back sliding door and climb over the fence that separates his yard from mine. I'm on their back deck in a blur and my hand is on their back door. I twist the knob and say a silent prayer of thanks that we live in a small town that doesn't feel the need to lock their doors. I quietly tiptoe through the kitchen, realizing that the layout of his house is similar to that of mine. I'm down the hall and outside what should be an office. The door is ajar and I push it open just enough to slip inside.
The room is spacious, elegantly decorated and smells of leather. The walls on either side of the room are lined with bookshelves – each shelf is filled with books, pictures, CDs and DVD cases. In front of me is a large wooden desk, two leather high backed chairs sit in front of the desk while another is situated behind it. The desk is littered with papers, folders, and a giant screen that takes up a majority of the space.
Without another thought I am seated at the mahogany desk and moving the mouse to wake up the sleeping computer. The desktop picture makes me pause – its Edward, his mother and father posing for a picture in front of a Christmas tree. They all wear smiles that reach their eyes – this is truly a happy occasion. Fuck you I think as my gaze falls on Edwards smiling face. I open the My Computer folder and notice a removable disk drive, I open it with two clicks and there suddenly isn't enough air in the room.
I see it. I see me…him…us. It makes me sick to see the carefree, happy smile on my face. The dreams are nothing compared to the images of myself bare for all to see. I see him touching me, bringing me to and over the edge of pleasure – its clear as day written on my face. I hear his words calling me beautiful, gorgeous, lovely, striking, stunning…and on and on as I relax in front of him allowing him to expose me…use me. As I feel the bile rise in my throat, I close the files; grab the jump drive out of the back of the computer, pocket it, and get up to leave.
My adrenaline is on overdrive as I creep back out of the office, down the hall, through the kitchen. Before I know it I'm easing the back door shut and slinking across the yard back to my sanctuary, back to my home. I lean against the sliding glass door as I catch my breath in the safety of my kitchen. My hand grips the jump drive as it sits in my pocket. I'm not sure of what exactly I'm doing. I can't go to my dad, what would he say? One words pops into my head, and I grind my teeth as I try desperately to think of another way out of this mess. With a sigh, I realize that I have no other option. The word sits on my tongue like a bad taste…Renee.
After switching my hooded sweatshirt for a long sleeve shirt I grabbed my Ipod, placed the jump drive in my jewelry box and decided a run was in order. It was just after 4am when my feet hit the pavement in the direction of the trail I had run the weekend before.
As soon as by breathing picked up and my muscles began to strain I felt better, I felt stronger. I was determined to not let this knock me down. I could play this situation one of two ways and as I turned off the road and up the gravel trail I weighted my options. On one hand, I could pretend that this never happened and let Edward think he won. While on the other hand, I could fess up to knowing his game.
Either way I had to face the fact that Renee was somehow involved in this. I needed to contact her and get to the bottom of this. She left years ago and the sting of rejection was still very raw, but I would need to swallow my pride and reach out.
I pushed all other thoughts out of my head as the steady beat of the song blasted in my ears setting my pace. The fog hung ominously over the trail making it hard to see more than a few feet in front of me, and in the blink of an eye I was knocked to the ground and my Ipod went skidding across the trail just out of my reach.
"Shhh…" a soft voice whispered in my ear.
I held my breath to stop myself from crying out. I listened carefully to the sounds around me. I heard the person holding my shoulders breathing heavily, the crunch of gravel as two pairs of feet rushed past a few yards ahead and the pounding of my heart as it echoed in my ears.
"Are you ok? I couldn't let them see me talking to you, so we had to hide or they would have seen us." She said.
I go to my feet slowly and took her in. She was a few inches taller than me with beautiful caramel colored hair; her eyes were a soft green unlike her son's. I recognized Edward's mother right away – even though she was now dressed similarly to my attire rather than her bright pink bathrobe.
"What do you want?" I asked, trying to calm my heavy breathing.
"Bella, we need to talk," she started. "They think I am some naive woman who doesn't see what is right in front of me, but I refuse to let this continue any further. You're an innocent person and don't need to be dragged into their mess."
"What? How do you know my name?" I asked, completely thrown off guard.
"Bella, I have so much to explain…lets take a walk, but we need to avoid this trail otherwise Edward and Carlisle will see us."
I followed her without hesitation. We walked a few yards down and started up a small foot path.
"Where do I begin," she said aloud, "I guess I should start by introducing myself. I'm Esme Cullen." She held out her hand and I shook it before we continued walking and talking. "I don't know exactly what Edward and Carlisle have planned, but it's been going on for a long time. I thought that once they met you they would just drop this whole nonsense, but clearly they are fixated."
"I'm sorry Esme, but I honestly don't know what your talking about." I told her firmly.
"Of course not sweet girl," she said, laying her hand lovingly on my shoulder. "We're from Chicago, did you know that?" I nodded and she continued on. "We lived there since Edward was about three, but before that we lived in here in Forks."
I gasped in surprise and my steps faltered slightly as I took in this new revelation.
"Edward mentioned Chicago, but he never told me you were from here." I said.
"Well, that's probably because he doesn't remember that well. I'm guessing you don't remember him either." She said raising an eyebrow at me.
"What? No, I just met him the other day." I said.
"Well, you two were just babies when we left. Your mom and I could barely keep the two of you away from each other. You were practically joined at the hip!"
"What?" I whispered.
"We were so sad when Charlie called us when your mom left. I wanted to move back and just sweep you into my arms, but Carlisle was determined to make it work in Chicago, and we had just got our marriage back on track, so it wasn't the best time for us to uproot. I knew about him and Renee from the beginning, but I foolishly ignored it until it just about destroyed us."
"I didn't…" she cut me off with a hug.
"Of course you didn't know Bella, you were just a baby. Renee was always a bit flirty with Carlisle. I knew they had been together from the moment their relationship changed. All of a sudden Carlisle couldn't leave the room fast enough when Renee entered it, and she flat out ignored him when he couldn't escape. I don't think Charlie ever knew, and I never had the heart to tell him. He loved her with his whole heart…still does I think. But I'm no fool Bella, soon after it began, it ended and we were on the next flight to Chicago. Carlisle threw himself into his work, and then all of a sudden we started receiving letters from Renee. Carlisle thought I didn't know, but I was the person who opened the first one. I was shocked by her words, her expectations, but I put the letter back together to make it seem as if I never saw it. I knew more would come, but he was a smart man and he quickly intercepted them before I could see.
Renee started asking him for money a few months after we were settled in Chicago, in exchange for her keeping their secret from me. Too bad I already knew. About six years later your mom up and left. I guess she had saved enough to start her new life. We hadn't spoken in a few years, but when Charlie called, I knew what was going on. Once a month a substantial amount of money was missing from our checking account – I knew it was going to her.
I thought it was all over with, but then Edward found one of the letters and started asking questions. We all went to counseling to deal with the hurt and betrayal. All of a sudden, we were one big happy family again and they wanted to move back to Forks. I'm no fool, I knew they were up to something, and as soon as I realized that we were moving next door to you it all clicked. I don't know what else they have planned Bella, but I refuse to let Edward punish you for his father's indiscretion. He is still dealing with the anger and hurt from his father's disloyalty."
I couldn't believe my ears, and this new information just kept spinning around in my head making me dizzy. Esme held me as tears ran down my cheeks; I didn't even know I was crying. I was beyond numb as we made our way back to the trail. She gave me a kiss on the cheek and hugged me tight whispering in my ear "don't worry Bella, I won't let this go on any further".
She left me on the trail with my thoughts as she took off in the opposite direction. I stood for a moment, stunned, and then I sped off towards home feeling surprisingly lighter. With a spring in my step I decide that I needed to get rid of the jump drive, confront my mother and find a way to make Edward pay for his actions.
I was rounding the corner approaching my house when it hit me. I have the pictures, I know about his past and now I know his game…I'm ready to take on anything Edward throws my way. I'm choosing to play dumb and see where it takes me. I sprint the last few yards and slow to a walk up driveway.
By the time I get to my room and peel off my clothes I only have forty minutes to shower and change for school. I barely wash and rinse before I am toweling dry and pulling on my uniform. I shovel down a bowl of cereal and am trudging out to the Volvo moments later. Today Edward is not leaning against my car and I breathe a sigh of relief as I get in and start the ignition. My school day goes by without a hitch and Edward never makes an appearance. I'm floating like a balloon as I return home that afternoon. Charlie is still at work, and I head upstairs to my room to change out of my uniform before I plan to start homework and make dinner.
Toeing off my shoes and shedding my knee highs I walk over to my closet to get a hanger to put my uniform on. Carefully hanging my shirt, vest and skirt in the closet I turned to walk over to my dresser to grab some comfy clothes to wear when I stop short at the sight of Edward standing in my doorway with fury in his eyes. I took a step back nearly falling into my closet – I could feel the hate radiating off of Edward rolling in waves in my direction.
"What are you doing here Edward?" I asked when I right myself.
"I know what your doing Bella and it's not going to work." He seethes.
"Edward, I really don't know what you're talking about, and honestly I don't care, but you need to leave…now." I said with as much conviction that I could muster.
"Baby…I'm not going any where." He said as he took a step towards me, entering my room.
"I asked you to leave, don't make me ask you twice." I threatened. After all, Charlie didn't raise a girl without teaching her how to defend herself.
He chuckled darkly as he continued walking towards me. I stood my ground, not wanting to show my fear. In mere seconds he was standing in front of me, so close I could feel his breath hit my face.
"You have to understand Bella, I have to do this, there is no other way." He said. His eyes made me pause as they showed regret and sadness.
"Please…" My words were cut off as Edward pushed me against the wall, trapping me with his arms.
"I don't want to do this Bella, I wish you could realize what it has been like." He said as his forehead slumped to rest on mine. His arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me close into a hug. I became embarrassingly aware of the fact that I was wearing just my blue, lacy bra with matching panties.
"I'm so sorry Bella, I wish there was another way." He said, "Please, tell me where the jump drive is."
I stiffened in his arms, he clearly knew that it was missing, but there was no way I was handing that over to him.
"I'm sorry too Edward." I said as I quickly brought my knee up to meet his groin. He called out in pain as his hands left my waist to cup himself. I took the opportunity to run to my dresser, grab the jump drive from my jewelry box and sprint down the stairs. As I rounded the hallway into the kitchen, I grabbed Charlie's coat off the rack and shoved my feet into a pair of boots left by the door as I flung the sliding glass door open and ran out into the backyard towards the woods that lined our property.
I just reached the tree line when I heard Edward.
"Bella!" He screamed. "I will find you…"
