Disclaimer: I don't own anything… nothing besides my own scars and the scars of my friends.

Description: Lucy makes a visit to the hospital to visit a friend from school.

A/N: Cutting and suicide are not a joke, and recently… I have had to talk a friend away from trying to end his or her own life. It hurts that they feel like they can't talk to me… when it was the same person that talked me down years ago. I hope that you enjoy. And if any of you need to talk. I am here for you.


Lucy moved through the halls of the hospital. She walked watching her feet, moving in the flow around her. She was almost gliding, past the nurses, the other staff, and the patients in the hallway.

She stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets as she walked. It was a few more moments before she heard anything. She snapped her head up at the sound of the voice of the person she was looking for.

She pulled her hands back out of her pockets and raced down the hallway, checking each room as she pasted. She skidded to a stop and backed up to the open doorway to see her friend, Julie, from school sitting up on her bed. She was holding a book, and Lucy could see the bandages that were wrapped around her hands.

"Hey," Lucy said, quietly, as she moved into the room slowly.

Julie put her book down onto her lap and leaned back into her pillows, "Hi. Did my parent's call you?"

Lucy shook her head as she pulled a chair from the wall to next to the bed.

"No… I, um…"

"Oh. Okay. So, you're the one that called and warned my parents?"

"I'm not sorry that I did, if you looking for an apology, I am not going to give one."

Lucy looked hurt. She was fighting back tears as it was, she didn't like hospitals and she especially didn't like them when she knew someone in them.

"I don't want one. I didn't mean for this to happen."

Lucy snapped up to her feet, "you didn't mean for this to happen? You didn't mean to get found bleeding out in my room. Were you trying to die?"

"No," Julie said. She leaned forward and grabbed Lucy's hand. "I didn't mean to cut so deep. I…. I… you were right…"

Lucy looked at Julie, expecting the girl to continue. She sat back down into her chair, her hands still in the other girls. She stared at the bandages, "How?"

Julie's voice was soft and Lucy wasn't sure she was really hearing it, "you were right, I couldn't stop whenever I wanted to. I tried… god… I tried Lucy. But… I got so itchy. It was nearing a burn. I just… I thought that one little cut would make me feel better… but it didn't. I didn't realize how deep it was… so I tried the other side. That was when I realized the amount of blood… Lucy please, look at me?"

Lucy looked up from their hands. She stared at Julie's face.

"I don't know what you want me to say, Lucy," Julie said, pulling her hands away and placing them in her lap. "I'm so tired, numb. You listen, but you don't really understand. You… you have… you… I want to be like you. Knowing what you are feeling, being proud of yourself. Everything. I want to believe, to know, to trust. But… I don't know how…"

Lucy nodded and looked back at her hands.

"I know I haven't been the best friend. I know it doesn't seem like I understand either… but Julie, I do get it," Lucy looked back up. She stared into Julie's eyes, making the girl look away but not hiding her tears silently falling down her face. "Please don't cry Julie."

Neither girl said anything for a while. Nothing could really be said. Finally, Julie asked the question that was on her mind.

"How did you know?"

Lucy looked up. She didn't smile, and she didn't offer an answer. She just grabbed Julie's hands and squeezed them.

When she left later that afternoon, after Julie fell asleep; she left a small blank journal behind. There was a note tucked between the cover and the first page.

'My grandma once told me that all you have to do is believe. I do, I always have. Just write and believe. It will get better.

I hope that you like the Lion design on the journal; you know how much I love them. Just sharing the love.'


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