A/N- Sorry for not updating. Still, there was a combination of The Son of Neptune and homework. Therefore, I couldn't update. Still, I'm updating now. And, btw, The Son of Neptune was AWESOME! If you haven't read it, do so immediately. (Octavian kills teddy bears! I'm still cracking up over that.)

Disclaimer- I don't own PJO. Trust me. If I did, The Son of Neptune would have been out earlier, and The Mark of Athena would be out earlier then next fall.

Chapter 8: Day Four- Past

Erin's POV

Lief had warned me that this could take a while, so I leaned back against one of the boulders that seemed to be everywhere around Zeus' Fist. Lief had leaned back and closed his eyes. His head was tilted back, and I could see his scar. For some reason, I couldn't take my eyes away from it. It took me a moment to realize Lief was speaking.

"I might as well start from the beginning. I was born in Chicago. I lived with my mother and two little sisters in an apartment there. Sound typical?" Lief started. I nodded. He continued, "My mom had remarried when I was two. My step dad was okay. I mean, we weren't close, but he wasn't mean to me or anything. My sisters…well, one of them was four years younger then me, and the other-" His voice broke for a second, "She was my twin."

"You had a twin?" I asked. Lief didn't seem like the type who'd have a twin, but I guess you never know.

"Yeah. Shannon. My little sister was Abby. We were happy, I guess. Mom was a teacher and a part-time musician. My step dad owned a coffee shop. Shannon and I were really close. We did everything together. Abby liked to be on her own. She was always off in her own little world." Lief smiled sadly at the memory.

"What was Shannon like?" I asked.

"Well…how do I describe her? Shannon was…she was kind of violent, she wouldn't hesitate to beat somebody up. Sometimes I think she was the only reason I made it through most of middle school. I was kind of the odd one out, the strange one. I've never really liked sports, but I was on the cross-country team. Shannon took karate. Man, but she was good at it. You would have liked her, I think. Don't think she was all violence. She had a mischievous side. She was always spying on people and playing pranks. Oh-" he broke off again, "This is impossible. How do I describe a person? You can't get their full essence into words."

"But you can into pictures," I said, remembering Lief's sketch. "Why wasn't your stepfather in that picture?" I asked.

"To me, he wasn't really part of the family. He seemed like an outsider, at least to me. Let's see, what else can I tell you about my family? Abby was really smart. She was always reading stuff. My mom…she was the best mom in the world, I think. She was always baking stuff for us. I can still taste her Nantucket pie…" Lief trailed off again.

"Go on," I prodded. I didn't want to rush Lief, but I still wanted to know what had happened.

"Well, I was different. You know me as sarcastic, closed off. Well, I wasn't really like that. I used to talk a lot. I was always really cheerful. I learned to play the guitar and the piano in second grade. I'm not sure which one I liked more."

"You played the guitar and piano?" I asked. I'd never seen Lief do anything even remotely musical except singing when Will forced him to.

"Still do, as a matter of fact. I just do when nobody else is around to hear."

"What else?" I asked.

"Well, I learned how to shoot a bow when I was 9. Shannon insisted I learned how to do something to defend myself." Lief hung his head and a tear leaked out. "It didn't help at all," he murmured. He lifted his head again and went on. "Anyways, we were happy. There never was much money, but we got by. That all changed in eighth grade. I was thirteen then, my birthday being in January. Another thing about living in Chicago. You learn to like the wind. I loved it. I loved the rain, too. Do you know how it is?"

"Kind of." Frankly, I'd never really liked the wind and hated the rain, but Lief was on a roll. "Keep going."

"So I was in eighth grade, and there was this new girl in my class. See, I used to go to a pretty small school. It was kind of for kids who weren't normal. Anyways, this girl, she was pretty. Like, drop-dead pretty. I was…attracted to her. I guess all the guys were. It was strange. She was…different. Something about her was different. In October, my friend Josh disappeared. Josh was the class clown and probably one of my best friends. A couple weeks later, he turned up dead. The strangest thing was, there were puncture marks in his throat. I was pretty creeped out. I mean, it was my best friends that had turned up dead.

"At the end of October, Halloween night, to be exact, Suzie -that was the girl- followed me home. I'm not sure how she did it without me noticing. I had been home for about half an hour before I noticed anything. I even remember what I was reading. I was rereading To Kill a Mockingbird. Shannon had given it to me for our birthday." Lief reached down inside his boot and pulled out the box I'd seen earlier.

"What's in there?" I asked.

"Never mind," Lief said brusquely. "I had been reading when I heard a scream. It was Abby's scream. I remember that Mom had soundproofed the apartment so nobody outside could hear what went on. I had liked that at first, but now I regret it. I ran into the living room. My mom and Shannon were tied to chairs. Abby was on the floor. There was a pool of blood streaming from her throat." Lief broke off again. There were more tears now. I looked at him more closely. His eyes were full of pain.

"You don't have to keep going if you don't want to," I said, putting a hand on his knee.

"No," Lief said roughly, brushing my hand away. "I've started, so I might as well finish. Mom was crying and begging for Abby's life instead of her own. She stopped once she realized Abby was dead. I remember…just before Abby died, she looked at me. That look- I can never forget it. It was full of so much pain and- and betrayal. I had betrayed them. That was when I charged into the living room. I had an arrow with me. I had been going to stab Suzie with it, but she looked at me. You have no idea what it was like. I- I couldn't move. I just had to stand there and watch. There wasn't anything I could do.

"Next she moved on to Mom. Shannon hadn't said anything until then, but as soon as Suzie attacked Mom, Shannon started up this steady stream of curses. Shannon had this powerful voice. It always sounded so dangerous. Right then, she was cursing Suzie with all her strength. After Mom slumped over dead, Shannon looked at me. I still couldn't move. 'Lief, you idiot, DO SOMETHING!' Shannon yelled. I tried. I really did-" Lief broke off again.

"Really, you can stop now," I said. "You don't have to keep going."

"What you don't realize is that this isn't even over yet," Lief said. "Suzie had moved on to Shannon. She had released her so that there could be a little bit of a fight. There wasn't one. Shannon didn't even have a chance. She died there, laying on the floor, looking at me. Just looking. But that was all I needed. That look had everything she needed to say. Then Suzie turned to me. All she had time for was a slash down my face before I turned and ran. That slash became my scar. I ran to my room, grabbed the first thing I saw- my ipod- and jumped out the window. We were on the second floor." Lief winced, "That hurt. But I ran, just ran, for as long as I could. I collapsed on the street after a while. I slept out there for a couple nights before I found my aunt. How do you describe Aunt Jessie? She was an artist. She told me to sketch the pain away. That's the sketch you saw. Still, I hadn't been there a week when Aunt Jessie was killed.

"I ran again. To another aunt. It happened again, though. That's when I just ran. I had already caused five people to die, and I didn't want to hurt anybody else. I didn't want to take the chance- the chance that I'd care for them. If I cared for them, loved them, they would die. That's what always happened. That's my story. I'm cursed, Erin. Cursed to never be able to have rest. I'm a traitor. And I don't blame you if you hate me now." Lief stopped. He rested his head on his knees and sobbed, big sobs that racked his body. I let him stay there for a minute before ever so gently putting my arm around him. He shrugged it off and stood up. "So," he said.

"What?"

"Now you know. You know the truth. You know I'm a coward. A traitor. I let my sisters die. Now, I want an honest answer. Do you hate me now? Because it's okay if you do. I hate myself too." I stood up.

"Lief, I don't hate you. You know that."

"Stop, Erin. Don't start. I can't- I can't let myself start to care for you. I can't let you care for me. Bad things happen. People get killed. It's better for both of us if you hate me."

I shook my head. "No, I can't do that. I can't just turn on you like that."

"Then it's your risk. But Erin?"

"What?" I asked.

"I'm begging you, please don't. Don't care about me. It's best if you just forget I ever existed. Goodbye." Leif pulled me into a hug, tucked his box back in his boot, and took off running through the woods. I stood there and watched him leave. It took me a moment to realize what happened. It occurred to me that Lief had just said goodbye. Which meant that he was leaving.

"No!" I yelled. "You can't leave!" I don't know if he heard me. I don't think he did. He kept running, his back getting smaller and smaller. I knew there was no hope of me ever catching him. I was about to turn around when I saw something on the rock. A note. A couple scribbled words looked up at me. "Sketchbook, page three," I read. "That doesn't make any sense."

Suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks. Lief's sketchbook. I ran into the cave and grabbed it off the table. Theo gave me a funny look as I ran back out. I flipped to the third page. There wasn't a sketch there. Instead, there was a letter. A letter from Lief.

Dear Erin,

If you are reading this, then you know the truth. The truth about my past. About who I really am. About my curse. If you are reading this, know that I am not dead. At least, not yet. I am on the move again. If I'm on the move, I can't become attached to anyone. I hope you understand why I left. Please don't try to contact me. It's for your own good. You can keep the sketchpad. Don't worry about me and try to forget I was ever here.

-Lief

P.S. You are the only Hermes kid I've ever found who I liked at all. Thank you.

I read the letter again, trying to absorb what I'd just seen. Lief couldn't be gone, could he? "Lief, you're such an idiot." I mumbled under my breath. "Running away with a wound like that and expecting me not to do anything. Just you wait until I find you." I stuffed the letter in my pocket and poked my head back into the cave. "Hey, Theo," I said. "Got any drachmas?"

A/N- And there you go. Sorry it's so short. Review?

-smartone101