A/N: This Chapter has several older-people themed parts. Firstly there's violence, suggestions about rape, a lot of language and sex. If you have a problem with the rating, please let me know and I WILL CHANGE IT. So far, no one has complained.
DISCLAIMED: I do not own Marvel Comics or any of its characters (X-men, Deadpool) I do however own all the other characters, so please ASK before you use them!
Illyria threw herself off the roof and spread her wings, catching Rogue mid air by the back of her neck. She knew the skin there was deadly, but there was fuck all she could do. Her other hand was occupied with emptying rounds into the soldier firing down at them. She just had time to haul ass back onto the roof before she felt herself slipping away. Her eyes rolled back in her head and the world went night-night.
Rogue screamed as memories not her own flew in and out of her mind. She only held on for a few seconds before she was swallowed by the life of Illyria Payne.
Illyria came awake screaming. Where was she? Where was Wade? Why wasn't Wade here?
"Wade? Wade?" She looked around frantically. She was in a medical room, oh fuck, oh fuck, no more medical rooms! "FELIX!" She screamed until her throat was raw. Then Logan came barrelling in the door.
"Marie! Marie?" He stopped short when he noticed the way she looked at him.
"Get away from me, Jimmy Logan." She got off the bed, her eyes darting carefully around the room, searching for a weapon. "I told you if you ever came looking for blood again, I'd give it to you." Her hand closed on the pole of her IV.
"Marie, its Logan…" Just then Felix ran in and suddenly a weight lifted from Illyria's shoulders.
"Felix." She ran towards him, but he backed away from her, his hands in the air.
"You're not Illyria. You're Rogue." He said, and she looked down at herself. No, that couldn't be right. She was missing her tattoos… Where were they? Where was…
"Where's Wade? Where are my tats? Felix what's going on? Where's Wade, he was just here! He was just with me!" Felix's eyes went wide.
"Holy fuck…" He muttered. Logan started yelling question but Felix shut him up with a glare.
"What day is it, Felix?"
"Its December the 19th. You went out like a light two days ago. Wade isn't here, its not that time of the year yet…" His words brought Rogue back to herself like an electric shock.
"Logan… What happened to me?" He would have answered, but Cardinal swooped in, followed by Kinessa and Bobby. Bobby ran to her immediately, but Felix held him back.
"If she's got pieces of Blue in there, she'll gut you like a fish."
"Why?" He tried to squirm away, but the Reverend held fast.
"Because when Illyria panics, she kills everything, so I suggest you back off before I feed you to her." He pretty much threw Bobby out of the room and into London, who hauled his ass back up the stairs.
Cardinal took a long hard look at everything, then began to speak.
"Felix, you may remain here because out of everyone you know Illyria best, Mr. Logan I trust the same can be said for yourself and Rogue?" Logan nodded. "Kinessa will stay because as an empath, she could come in handy." Her grey eyes locked on Rogue. "What is your name?"
"Rogue. My name is Rogue."
"Are you sure?"
"No…?"
"Can you read my mind, Rogue?" Rogue blinked, and then realised she could read everyone's minds. Their voices where white noise in the back of her head. That made a quiet voice inside her sigh contentedly.
"Yeah. Yeah I can. That makes me happy, why?" Cardinal nodded and suddenly some of the voices disappeared. She couldn't hear any of Larmes du Soleil, but she had no idea how to fix it. Felix answered her question.
"Illyria hates cages, she likes to know her powers work. We've all put up our shields, so you shouldn't be able to hear us now." That seemed to ring true with the voice in her head, so she shrugged.
"And now? Are the voices better?"
"I can still hear Professor Xavier's people…" Cardinal nodded again.
"Okay, listen to me. You absorbed Illyria. It was accident. We're hoping now that you're awake, she'll begin to recover." Rogue nodded, and Felix whispered something to Cardinal. Rogue was surprised she heard it.
"We need to call Wade, he's gonna go psycho if he finds out from someone else."
"No." Rogue said. "If you call Wade, he won't have his head on straight, and you know what he's like…"
"Do I, Rogue? What is he like?" But Rogue couldn't remember. It was on the tip of her tongue, on the edge of her thoughts… Why couldn't she remember? Who was Wade anyway? "That's my girl you put in the hospital. My girl. And I'll be damned if Wade isn't here for this. I might not always like the cock-sucker, but he cares about her."
"Who does?" She asked, "Who's Wade?" She looked around at everyone's faces. They were all surprised, or worried, the only mind she could read was Logan's, and that was just a confused jumble. She didn't speak brain language. "What's going on?"
"She's drifting in and out." Kinessa said. "I can't believe we didn't think of this before…" She put a hand over her face.
"Think of what?" Felix asked.
"Illyria's a powerful telepath, right?"
"One of the best, sure."
"She knew what she was doing, on that roof. She knew what touching Rogue's skin would do, right?" Felix nodded slowly, still not seeing where this was going. "So maybe she locked some things away. Pieces of herself, so Rogue could absorb them but not reach them. Get what I mean? Her powers – mind reading, shifting and the like – Rogue absorbed, Illyria couldn't turn them off, but she could hide her memories." She took a step forward. "Can I try something?"
"By all means." Cardinal waved her forward, but Logan growled.
"No! You could kill her." Felix snarled at his comment.
"As opposed to Rogue who's as safe as houses? Fuck off, Wolverine." They would have continued had Kinessa not shocked them both lightly and slipped past before they could recover.
"Rogue, do you know who I am?"
"You're Kinessa."
"Do you know… when I quit smoking?" Rogue thought about it. It was right there… just outside her grasp… right there…
"No."
"Does the name Wade Winston Wilson mean anything at all to you." She felt that voice inside her head become more a feeling that a voice. It was one of warmth, one of care, of love. But the name meant nothing now.
"I… I don't… I don't know the name, but…"
"But it makes you feel something?"
"Yeah…" She pulled at the hospital gown she wore, ashamed of the tightness in her belly and the warm flush that Wade's name had brought on. Kinessa must have picked up on her feelings.
"It's okay. I know you're together with Bobby, but for right now, it's okay for you to feel however you do about Wade."
"However I do? What do you mean?"
"Well, to be honest, none of us really knows if Illyria and Wade are together or not…" She offered a lopsided smile. "Blue was always good at hiding what she felt, even with me." Rogue arched a brow.
"You guys never talked about him?"
"About Wade?" Kinessa chuckled. "Wade… no we never talked about him. Not in that sense anyway. Blue is very… private. Tell me, Rogue, can you speak any new languages?" Once again, Rogue had the answer on the tip of her tongue. Some strange words floated towards her, but they were gone before she could catch them. She shook her head and Kinessa nodded. "Illyria was fluent in about twelve languages, at last count, and she could get by in another six."
"Should I get the Professor?" Logan asked.
"What for?" Felix arched his brow.
"He can fix this…" He waved at Rogue.
"Fix what? Illyria kept her secrets, that's all."
"Yeah, but maybe it would be better for Rogue - "
"Fuck. That." A growl rumbled through the room and somehow Rogue recognised it for the protective gesture it was. "Rogue isn't the victim here. She'd be dead if it wasn't for my partner. The only reason I haven't taken her Goddamn head off is because maybe, just maybe Illyria might come out of this." Kinessa wrapped a gloved hand around Felix's arm.
She pressed a button on the intercom.
"London, come down here and get Felix. Work out with him before he kills someone." Felix nodded his silent thanks before Kinessa turned to Logan. "Illyria hasn't given her consent and so the Professor will not be going anywhere near Rogue's (and therefore her) mind. Not that he would be able to get past the barriers if he did…" Rogue felt an alien sense of satisfaction at that and patted herself on the back for a job well done. The voice in her head spoke up again, with real words this time. Fuck this shit. No one's going near my head. Rogue just shrugged it off.
London arrived less than a minute later and took Felix away.
"I'm kinda hungry…" Rogue looked uneasily at Cardinal. "I don't wanna…"
"It's fine, dear, come with us." Kinessa offered her some clothes and a pair of gloves and they all left while Rogue changed. The whole time she was torn between reaching for the things she knew she should know and leaving Illyria's business alone.
When they got upstairs, Bobby gave her a hug, careful not tot ouch skin, but she stayed tense.
"Are you okay, Rogue?"
"Yeah, I'm right as fucking rain, Popsicle." She snapped, but when she realised what she'd said, she slapped a hand over her mouth. "Oh my God, Bobby, I'm so sorry!" He backed away from her.
"What's going on, Rogue?"
"I'm sorry, Illyria's in my head an I just... I just…" Kinessa was right there.
"It's okay." She didn't touch her though and for some reason that made Rogue grateful, once again, Kinessa must have noticed. "When she's stressed, she doesn't like touch." Kinessa led her through to the kitchen, where Jubilee and Kitty were both waiting. Before they went in, Kinessa pulled her aside. "You may well end up saying things you don't mean, or you don't understand. We tried to explain, but I don't think they quite got the drift…" Rogue just nodded, blinking away tears.
When she got inside, both Kitty and Jubilee tried to hug her, but she stayed rigid in their arms.
"Where is Felix?" Kinessa bit her lip before answering.
"He's going a few rounds with London. They're probably beating the living daylights out of each other." She tried for a joke, but it fell flat and for the first time Rogue realised the seriousness of the situation. Illyria was in a hospital bed. Kinessa's friend, Felix's partner - a member of their family, all because her life had been in danger.
"I'm so sorry…" She felt like crying, but something was keeping her back, some wall stood between her and tears.
"Illyria doesn't cry. I don't think I've ever seen her cry, but again, you'd have to ask Felix…"
"She and Felix are close?" Kinessa just nodded, before quickly turning away and busying herself with something else. When she turned back around, she had a bright smile of her face.
"Here. Black, no sugar." She handed Rogue a cup of coffee.
"I take cream and sugar…"
"Just try it." She did, and she almost kicked herself. What was she thinking; of course she drank her coffee this way… Except that she didn't - Illyria did. You're stuck with me, Stripes. Until I get better, anyway. This time Rogue listened to the voice in her head and took comfort from the reassurance.
"Rogue, are you even listening to me?" Kitty demanded. Rogue just blinked at her. "You weren't, were you?" She shook her head.
"Excuse me… I need… I need to…" And again, Kinessa was right there.
"You need to run?" Rogue just nodded. "Come on then." On their way upstairs they passed the library, and Rogue's enhanced senses picked up the sound of sobs. Curiosity got the best of her and she wondered in, ignoring Kinessa's warnings.
Aisling was sitting on one of the windowsills with her head between her knees and huge sobs rocking her body. Rogue tried to back out quietly, but Ash's head snapped up.
"What are you doing here?" She asked. Ash was a few months older than Rogue and with her shock of black curls and dark almond eyes, she was much more exotic.
"I'm sorry…"
"You're sorry? You're sorry?" she stood to her full height, an inch or so above Rogue and glared, with fat tears still rolling down her cheeks. "If she dies, my father will kill you and I will smile at your funeral. Do you understand?"
"I didn't... I didn't mean to."
"You've take away one of the most important people in my life. I will never forgive you. I get that it wasn't on purpose, I do. But neither are car accidents." Then she brushed past on footsteps so quiet even Rogue's new super-hearing didn't pick them up.
Eventually she made it up the stairs and changed into some running clothes. Kinessa said she wouldn't come because Rogue's body would now naturally be able to move much faster than hers. She would run alone because Felix was beating himself up, London was helping and Haven hardly ever left the house.
As she raced through the woods on the grounds she listened to her heartbeat and revelled in the wind rushing over he face. Rogue had never liked running, but now it made her feel free and she found she had the strangest urge to fly. Finally, she came to an outcropping of rock that overlooked the valley that the property dropped into. She stood at the edge and felt the after noon breeze across her face. She wasn't breathing very hard, either.
On a whim, she called out to the voice in her head.
- Are you there, Illyria?
- Yeah, I'm here. What's up?
- What's going on?
- I shut you out of all my memories, but I did a bang up job.
- You're doing pretty good so far…
- Nope, I only had what…? Four seconds? I could have done better.
- What happens now?
- Fuck if I know… I guess I'll wake up at some point…
Then Rogue literally felt her fade away, and along with it came a wave of sadness. Illyria missed her family, Rogue realised. She missed Felix, and London and Cardinal and all the others. She missed them, because she was trapped inside Rogue. She tried calling out again, but no one answered.
Rogue ran more, she ran until it was dark, and then thought of running some more. The part of her that was Illyria, dormant as it was, knew she could keep going – wanted to keep going – but Rogue just wanted to go home.
When she got in, Logan was waiting for her, but not in the way she expected.
"Why did you call me Jimmy Logan?" He demanded. Rogue just gave him wide eyes. "What does Illyria know about me?"
"Logan, I don't know. She's shutting me out and I can't see."
"Look harder, or maybe the Professor can…" Neither of them noticed Haven until he rumbled in.
"No fucking way, Canada. The Professor's not going near Illyria's mind."
"But she knows stuff!" Haven just shrugged. "Why didn't she tell me?"
"Did you ask?" He crossed his huge arms across his chest and managed to make Logan look small.
"Well, no… but."
"Then there you go, punk. If you don't ask, you don' get." Rogue took the opportunity to slip away, into the kitchen. Felix looked up from the counter. His eyes were emptier than she'd ever seen them - full of sadness, of longing.
"Hey." He said. She tried to smile back. "Hungry?" Rogue nodded, she'd forgotten to eat earlier, with everything going on. "Everyone else's already eaten." He pulled a plate out of the oven, took off the foil and slid it across to her. Roast beef with potatoes. He also slid her over a glass of water and an apple, which she did smile for. "Anything yet?"
"She misses you…" Rogue dared take a peak at him. His jaw was set in a hard line, and there was a fading bruise around his eye. He had a split lip. There was a five o'clock shadow on his chin and he looked like he hadn't slept in days. "You look like shit, partner." She winked without thinking and she practically heard his muscles tense. "I'm so sorry… It's just." He cut her off.
"It's fine, Illyria's an intense person, even when she tries not to be. She's always got to say her piece. No worries." He just went to the fridge and bit into his own apple.
Meanwhile, In Cardinal's office, The Professor was sitting in his wheelchair watching the redhead and Victor, who was perched quietly on the side of her desk. He hadn't said much.
"I would like to look inside her mind, to see if there is anything I can do for her." He watched carefully for their reactions. They looked at each other.
"Do?" Cardinal asked. "As Felix had already told you - "
"I don't believe Felix is in a fit condition to make these decisions."
"With all due respect, Professor, you know absolutely nothing about Felix. He keeps his head, always. His eye is on the ball, always. If their roles were reversed and it were Felix in that bed, I would agree that Illyria would be unfit to make big decisions. But Felix is perfectly capable. You also have no right to decide otherwise."
"I am trying to help her." Cardinal just gave him a cold smile.
"I don't believe you." She raised a hand before he could protest. "I think you're curious about how Illyria put up barriers around her psyche, preventing Rogue from full access. I think you want to know how they work and I think you want to test them. I think that when you came here, you thought Illyria was just a weak youngling who could forge weapon from her mind and now you realise you could be wrong. I think you want to know just how much she can do." The Professor blinked.
"Are you telepathic?" She laughed and the sound was like the ringing of silver bells. Still Victor just sat there.
"No, Professor, I am not. I just have lots of experience with manipulators, professors, and scientists." She stood and smoothed her pencil skirt. "A word of advice, before we go?"
"Please."
"Do not do this. The only reason your Rogue still lives is because this business deal included the protection of your people while they were in our home. I do not know the specifics of Tiger-Clan law, but I believe either Felix or Illyria's lover (whomever he may be) is owed a life debt. They have not collected, but I don't believe they will be quite so understanding should you try to touch Illyria's mind, whether its inside Rogue or not." She came around the desk and Victor silently followed. "Illyria has many secrets, Professor. She is privy to much information and she has many skeletons in her closet. She would not appreciate your violation of her privacy and she is the type to hold a grudge. If you cross that line, I can almost guarantee that she will take your life when she wakes." With that, she showed him out the door and shut it firmly behind him. He tried to reach her mind, but the barriers were up tight.
Inside the office, Cardinal's shoulders slumped.
"What if she doesn't wake up, Victor?" She looked into her husbands hazel eyes and took comfort in the strength she saw there.
"She will." He wrapped his arms around her and smoothed a hand through her hair. "I know that because Sherrylin has some paintings that have yet to come. Illyria is in them. She will wake up. The question is: when?"
Kinessa finally put Rogue to bed the Green Room, made sure the other girls were in their rooms and then went to hers. London was shrugging on a pair of sweatpants when she came in.
"London…" He came over to her and lifter her off her feet. When they were both settled on their bed he stroked her brown locks lovingly. "Oh, London…"
"I know, lover, I know." He kissed the top her head and held her as silent tears poured down her face.
"When is she going to wake up?"
"She will, pet, she will." There was nothing more he could say – no comforting words he could offer her, no oaths he could swear, nothing could make this better until Illyria opened those baby-blues of hers and punched someone. He flicked off the lights, removed his sunglasses and rocked her back and forth.
It was 3am when London heard Rogue screaming in her room. He rolled off the bed and dashed the Green Room to find the young teen bolt upright in bed, huddling beneath the covers. Before comforting her, he made sure to open all the blinds: All Illyria's long years in captivity had made her hate closed off rooms and he didn't doubt that knowing she could bolt if she chose to would make her feel better.
"Rogue, you okay?" He slowly approached the bed; taking in the girl's wide, tear filled eyes. "Can I come closer?" She just nodded. "Nightmare?"
"One of Illyria's."
"Gimme a sec, pet." He dashed back to his room as quietly as he could, grabbed a fur lined sheepskin jacket, a blanket and his smokes. By the time he'd returned, Rogue had calmed a little. "Come outside, chit, the space'll make you feel better." He handed her the jacket (even though she probably wouldn't need it – her body temperature would be as high as his now) and the blanket and opened the sliding door onto the patio. Rogue followed silently. When he lit a smoke, he handed her one too: Illyria had smoked for years. She took it without comment, as if it were natural. "Want to tell me about it?" She just looked away and replayed it over in her mind.
Illyria walked into the ring and heard the heavy iron gate close behind her. She felt her powers come on line and braced herself for the fight. Across the dirty circle was a little boy, no more than fifteen, huddled away. The bell sounded and as much as she hated it, she began her reach for his mind.
Studiously ignoring his fear and suffering she searched for his fighting style. He was young, this one would be easy. She took a moment to curse the souls of her captors for putting a small boy in the ring with someone as experienced a fighter as she, cursed them for bringing him here at all.
Next, she searched for his mutation. Energy blasts, huh. Maybe this one wouldn't be so easy after all. She was dragged back into her own body by the cheering of the crowd. With very little energy, she formed a psychic sword and prepared herself.
The poor little kid was still huddled in the corner, young thing that he was. Fuck this shit, she should make this quick. With light easy steps she approached him. He looked up and his rich brown eyes were full of tears. She expected him to beg for his life. Beg for her not to hurt him, beg for help. Instead he just looked straight at her.
"Make it quick." Then he stood. She knew she couldn't say this out loud in case the crowd heard, so she sent him a quick metal message.
"I'll make it as quick and painless as I know how." Then she plunged the sword into his head. He gave a short scream before slumping unconscious to the ground. Good old brain-scrambler.
She knelt down before him, picked him up by his hair and twisted his head hearing his neck break with a resounding snap. Then he was gone. Just like that. The blip on her radar that had been his mind was just gone. He was no more.
They switched the power inhibitor back on before dragging his body out and dumping a new fighter back in. This one was bigger, more experienced. And to top it all, they'd given him a sword. Fuck. Fuckedy, fuck. This guy was out to win.
There was much more blood spilt in that round.
Rogue came back to herself when London snapped his fingers in front of her eyes. Taking a drag of her cigarette, she told him what she'd seen.
"Where was she? Why was she doing that?" London just looked out over the balcony, taking another drag.
"Blue was… Before I met her, this is, she was a slave. You seen her tats?" He motioned to his wrist and throat, and Rogue nodded. "They're slave tattoos. She was captured young, a kid I think, and first she was a uhh… she was a sex slave." He winced, as if maybe reconsidering telling her all this. She waited in silence and since Illyria hadn't told her to tell him to shut up, she decided that was best. "Then when her mutations kicked in, they turned her into a cage fighter. She used to fight to the death for sport." He sounded scornful, hating. It was the most emotion Rogue had ever heard in his voice.
"How did she escape?" She stubbed out her cigarette.
"You'd have to ask her that, pet. She never told yours truly. She don't talk much, does Blue. Plays her cards close to her chest and no mistake." It took Rogue a few extra seconds to realise what he was talking about – sometimes London's different ways of saying things were hard to understand.
They talked a little longer about unimportant things, then Rogue decided maybe trying to go to sleep was a good idea. London left the blinds open for her and she appreciated it.
Rogue walked up the worn steps of the old townhouse, watching the street carefully. She was in London, near Park Lane, although she didn't know what she was doing there. She was in Illyria's body, going through all the motions Illyria had already done in the past, but not trying to. She unlocked the door with a key she found under the matt and pushed it open.
The house was spacious, for central London, and expensive – even Rogue could see that. She heard someone moving around in the kitchen and Illyria's body guided her that way. Try as she might, she couldn't change the route they were taking, or their actions. This must be Illyria's dream or memory of something, she mused, not mine.
There was a man fiddling with a coffee pot, standing at 6"2, with 200 lbs of pure muscle, he looked pretty fucking scary. Rogue was freaking out.
"Morning doll face, you're early." He drawled, without turning around. Illyria walked up, fixed the coffee pot then let the stranger wrap his arms around her. He captured her lips and even though Rogue had no control over this body, she still felt what it felt. And this felt good.
She (well, Illyria) was the perfect height. Just short enough to fit beneath his chin, and tall enough not to stand on tiptoes.
"You look good, Lily." She just smiled and nodded at the coffee pot.
"Coffee for Wade?" He shook his head and grinned.
"Nuh-uh, baby… Lily for Wade." He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist before kissing him again. This time he slipped his tongue inside her mouth and she felt sparks run down her smile. He began walking out of the kitchen.
When they reached the bedroom, he lay Rogue down on the bed and his brown eyes met her now-blue ones.
"I missed you," he said, bending to kiss her throat. "I've been gone away too long." Another kiss. "I've seen too much." One more. "I'm all better now." Then he took her lips. He kissed her for a long time, enjoying the moment without a though of what would come later. She felt the shape and softness of his lips, the warmth of his hands pulling her hips close to his, slowly caressing her waist. She savoured the sensation, relishing the touch she never got to have, and the part of her that was Illyria knew that he loved the softness of her skin beneath his own hands. She knew how much Wade liked to touch her, knew how he craved it when she was gone – more than she craved his touch, for it was the sound of his voice that she missed.
She let him play with her tongue and she played back, cupping his face in her hands, running her fingers through his soft brown hair, down his muscular arms, across his back, then towards the front. She opened his zipper to let his cargo pants fall open.
He came free into her hand, and the young, virginal Rogue inside Illyria's body blushed. She'd never seen a man naked before. It was almost as if it were written: they went slowly, giving Rogue time to guiltily savour it.
He kept kissing her, until she pulled back from his lips, dragged her own across his jaw, behind his ear, to the soft, untouched skin there. Rogue got one of her rare glimpses into Illyria's mind: this was one of her favourite places on her lover's body. She covered it with little kisses, then followed a trail down his neck, stopping to remove his shirt (and he hers) before continuing to his clavicle, then his nipple, then a sweet spot on his left side. She flipped him over to lie on his back before continuing her journey.
When she finally reached his cock, she let it pass her by, hearing the soft sound he made. It was almost mewing, like a kitten. But Wade wasn't a kitten and the entity that was a combination of Rogue and Illyria knew that -knew it well. She took him in her mouth, just the head, and licked and sucked until he was lifting his hips off the silk bedcovers.
She felt, rather than saw his balls pull up, his cock swell with every touch and she heard his heart race and skip beats. For a moment Rogue felt guilty about intruding on Illyria's private moment, but then he spoke.
"Please, Lily." His breath caught. "Please…" It was just a whisper, but it pulled a chord deep inside Rogue, which she decided must be the part of her which was Illyria, and she looked up.
He was propped up on his elbows, staring down at her with something she did not expect. Rogue had always thought men saw oral sex as just a way to degrade women, to dominate them, but the look she could see in Wade's eyes was one of love - of trust, of desire, of everything she'd always wanted a boy to look at her with. That's when she understood why they never had: she'd been looking at boys. And this, this beautiful body beneath hers, the emotions running through his eyes, the words he said: they were a man's.
She felt her own hunger growing; she felt the empty space inside her body, inside her heart, her mind, and her soul that he needed to fill up. He reached his hand down, slipped off her sweats and her underwear and touched her just right, as if he knew exactly what to do.
Again, Rogue felt herself blush. A man had never, ever, touched her like this. She would have worried that she didn't know what to do had she not been wearing Illyria's body. Another pang of guilt came, but it was quickly smothered in the pleasure she felt at his fingertips. He slipped a finger inside her and she sucked in a breath, surprised but just how aroused she was.
He pulled her up until he had his back to the headboard and she was sitting just above his hips, with his knees at her back for support. He kissed her gently first, positioned himself and then did something that took her completely by surprise.
"May I, Lily?" The question in his eyes was genuine, and Rogue took a second to wonder why he would ask permission. The part of her that was Illyria was grateful though, and Rogue got the impression that not everyone had been given permission.
"Yeah." She kissed him and joined them. She couldn't restrain a little hiss and Rogue watched in rapture as he shut his eyes and leaned his head back. His lips were parted and she darted forward to kiss them. She let out a little cry of what she could only describe as joy at having him this close to her again. She never wanted to let him go, and once again that line between who she was and who Illyria was got blurred.
She didn't move for a while, she just wanted to feel his fullness, his heat, his need to be here – with her. Then as Illyria's body started rocking a little, both women felt their need build. Wade's eyes snapped open and searched for hers. She lifted her forehead from his shoulder, where she didn't remember laying it, and kissed his mouth, his cheeks, his neck, she kept kissing and in between each peck she silently thanked whatever god was out there for bringing him back to her – safe and whole – for giving her this incredible chance at love, at life, she thanked the heavens for this incredible man. In between her own prayers, she heard him muttering his own.
Rogue pulled back, opened her eyes and locked her gaze with his, letting him fill her with a thousand sensations. His eyes were beautiful to her, with long, feminine lashes, all luscious and dark. The rich brown was fired up with desire, his pupils dilated. Fascinated, she'd stopped moving – but he hadn't forgotten why they were there.
He began the rocking this time, and it all became too much. Rogue began to panic as a feeling she didn't understand overwhelmed her. It wasn't much help when her body followed the sensation naturally. She clutched at his shoulders desperately, eyes wide with pleasure as he continued to move.
"Wade…" it was whisper –nothing more – but it was enough. Just the sound of his name pushed her over the edge. She shut her eyes as whimpered and her belly tightened. She couldn't move, she couldn't breathe, but he wasn't done yet. He lifted her, putting her gently on her back. She opened her legs voluntarily and let him slide back inside her and even though she thought she was spent, she felt her eyes snap open again. He spoke, then and Rogue was surprised. She didn't know men talked when they had sex.
"Look at you, Lily. Look at you." He ran one hand down her side, still pushing himself in and out of her, still making love to her. "My Lily, my beautiful Illyria." He kissed her throat and her collarbone, supporting himself with one hand while the other danced lightly over her skin. "Oh, Illyria, oh, fucking hell, look at you." She lifted her arms to rest her hands on his shoulders; he put his other hand down and thrust hard. Once, twice, three times and there was that sensation again – like she was exploding, like she would suddenly turn inside out.
"Wade!" He followed her this time, and she opened her eyes in time to catch the most beautiful sight she had ever seen.
His eyes were clamped shut, his mouth open, his whole body tense. "Ahh, Illyria, oh my God." The muscles in his neck stood out and he made a strangled sound deep in his throat before throwing his eyes open with a gasp. His voice was must softer this time. "Oh, my God." He laid his head on her shoulder for a second and she heard his hear beating a mile a minute. "Oh, my God." He finally rolled them both over, and Rogue found herself splayed across his chest and happy to be there.
When Rogue woke up, she rolled over expecting to bump into a broad, warm chest. When she didn't she felt a tug at her heart. Or Illyria did, before she completely shut down their connection. Rogue didn't remember much of her dream. Just locking gazes with brown eyes, exploding from the inside out and the name Lily being whispered like a prayer upon lips she'd never seen before.
It was quite late in the morning now so Rogue hurried downstairs. She couldn't say exactly why she insisted on dressing more for functionality than looks, but it must have been Illyria.
"Good morning, Rogue." Kinessa gave her a little smile and even though Rogue couldn't read her mind, the part of her that was Illyria saw the slumped line in her shoulders and the shadows in her eyes.
"Morning." Kitty and Jubilee both greeted her too, but she could only manage a smile for them. London came down soon after. He rumbled and flowed, the way he always did, and Rogue found herself reminded of the ocean. Unstoppable. He greeted her then went straight to Kinessa. He put his arms around her and gave her a gentle kiss. Even though his eyes were hidden behind his glasses, Rogue recognised the look on his face. He was comforting her, and she felt ashamed. Blood rushed to her face and she turned away quickly, running for the door and up a set of stairs. She heard people shouting behind her, but she kept heading up until she hit the fire escape door.
Rogue hadn't known how to get here, until Illyria told her. She was out in the morning, in the winter, in New York. Idiot. Then she realised she wasn't cold – must be the new body heat. She ran to the edge of the roof and looked down, taking deep, slow breaths.
Even with her super-hearing she didn't hear anyone behind her, but she smelled him.
"Petite, you okay?" She didn't look at him.
"I… yeah, I'm fine." When she did look at him, she realised that it didn't matter if she was okay. Remy's red on black eyes were sunk and tired. He hadn't shaved in days (not in a stylish way, more homeless) and his clothes were rumpled. "Oh, my God, are you okay?" She tried to walk closer to him, but he deftly slipped past and sat on the edge.
"Chere, de closest thin' Remy has to une sœur is in a hospital bed." He laughed, but it was tired and bitter. "Actually, dis one look good when you look at Felix, non?" He was right. She hadn't seed Felix yet that morning, but she'd bet he looked terrible.
"She… ahh, she misses you guys." She sat next to him. "She says she's working on getting back to her body." He just nodded. After what felt like hours, he finally spoke. He said something Rogue needed to hear, and for once, she felt it was really true.
"Petite, she saved yo' life. She knew what she was doin'. 'Llyria don' do stupid shit, she does wha' she wants when she wants. C'est sa vie! Course, you should have known how close to de edge y' was, mais… you're young petite, dat come wit experience." He touched a gloved hand to her face. "Look at dis Cajun, chere." When she did, he still kept touching her. "Smurfette'll wake up. Always does. She'll wake up, she'll kick y' ass, she'll move on. None o' dis is y' fault."
They spent the rest of the morning perched up there, talking comfortably about everything. She was Rogue – it looked like Illyria had taken a little time out.
Downstairs though, London was pacing around Cardinal's desk while Kinessa shouted at him from a chair.
"You can't do this, she could kill you!"
"Yeah, but what if she learns something?"
"London, she's not a speeding bullet or a car you can jump in front of." She stood and tried to shake some sense into him, but he was on a warpath, so he just paced in circles around her. "We don't know how this works! If we don't know how it works, how can you possibly try to control it?"
