Urgh, sorry this is a day late, guys, I'm still in the thick of assignment time xS Hopefully it'll be better by next week, though. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

P.S 'The only thing I have left in my head is songs by bands called Tricksy Pixie' is something my best friend said to me in math class. It was actually a pretty similar situation; I was keeping secrets and apparently she never does. I didn't know what it meant or if it was even a band but I thought it was hilarious.


When Remus found Sirius that night, the dark haired Marauder of questionable morals and sexuality was alone, fortunately, in the dormitory. James and Peter were enjoying a game of chess in the common room but Remus hadn't been able to focus, mind reeling from the earlier conversation. He stumbled upon the object of his confusion by accident. Sirius, sitting cross legged on his bed examining a piece of parchment, held his hands together at his chest and bowed his torso when Remus walked in.

"Aaaah, my young apprentice... You sit now, observe zee grand master..."

Remus hardly registered the ridiculous accent Sirius was putting on, still unable to focus. He stumbled numbly to Sirius's bed and sat at the opposite end where his friend/sensei had indicated.

"Zis, apprentice, is zee modern man's most essential tool..." he turned to Marauder's Map to face Remus.

Remus frowned, brought back out of his thoughts for a moment, "I-What?"

"Zis is map of zee castle," Sirius proclaimed, sweeping a hand slowly above the map in demonstration, "And also map of zee people... All zee people. What zey do, where zey... be."

He hovered his hand over the common room and all the tiny dots that marked the people inside.

"So, if used correctly, zis is map-" Sirius suddenly swept up violently, landing in a crouch on the mattress with his hand raised to the sky, "OF ZEE PUSS-"

"Sirius, are you gay?"

Even the temples of Asia that Sirius so crudely mocked could never achieve the degree of silence that followed. It was long and painful and Remus regretted opening his mouth instantaneously. Eventually, however, Sirius unfroze from his ridiculous pose and flopped to the bed. Now of the same level, their eyes locked. Remus was startled by the alarm in the silver orbs that so often held such indifference. The dark haired Animagus seemed to struggle to speak. His lips parted many times but his words seemed to choke him. When he couldn't take it anymore, Remus broke the intense eye contact and the silence.

"I-it's just I... Well, I already know you are... I just wanted to..." Remus stopped. Pathetic.

A ghost of a mocking smile pulled at Sirius's lips but he was clearly far from joking.

"Um... Who told you?" Sirius voice barely carried the length of the bed.

Grateful from his quick risk evaluation skills, the product of being best friends with two borderline pyromaniacs, Remus immediately remembered to protect James. Judging by what he heard and now Sirius's reaction, it was obvious that this was meant to be a secret. From him, at least. The thought returned some of Remus's anger from earlier. Why could everyone else know but him? Still, he had a duty to protect James.

"I... I heard it in passing from a couple of girls and so I asked around a bit... Nobody important, though."

Unfortunately, his lying wasn't quite up to scratch.

"It was James."

Sirius's observation was impeccable, at least. They'd be lethal as a unit, Remus noted somewhere in the back of his mind.

Remus was forced to nod, resigned to the fact that lying was not an option. With his skill, he'd probably end up relaying the entire conversation word for word before he noticed.

Sirius sighed but thankfully didn't get angry.

"I didn't want you to find out this way." he murmured instead.

Remus frowned. All informant protection was blown, he wanted answers.

"Why? Everyone else knew, why not me?"

Sirius shifted, fingers curling around themselves as he again struggled to find words.

"I don't see why this is a big deal." he finally managed. Remus shot him an exasperated look.

"Of course it's a big deal! Or... not? I don't know! But irregardless, it's something you should have told me!"

Sirius frowned, "Why? It doesn't affect you!"

Remus stopped. Sirius was right. It didn't affect him at all, why did it bother him so much?

"Besides, I didn't tell James or Pete..." Sirius added quietly. Remus could feel his friend watching him closely but he didn't look up just yet, still deep in thought.

"But... you obviously wanted to keep it a secret from me." Remus said slowly, looking up to meet his friend's gaze.

Obviously, he'd hit the nail on the head because Sirius had broken eye contact almost instantly.

"Well, I..."

Spurred on by his success, Remus continued, "James said that it was really obvious and everyone knew! He said that I was just really self absorbed and I should have realized but then he said he noticed that you never spoke about guys when I was around!"

Sirius cringed.

"It's not really my business if you didn't get around to telling me but you actively hiding it from me is another thing entirely! When did we stop telling each other things, anyway? You know everything about me! I tell you everything! Seriously, the only thing I have left in my head is songs by bands called Tricksy Pixie!"

Sirius frowned, "Is that even a ba-?"

"I don't know! The point is... Well, you know."

Sirius nodded slowly.

"I'm sorry I kept it from you," he said, "I wasn't meaning to at the beginning."

He flashed Remus a small, teasing smile, "You actually were kinda self absorbed."

Remus rolled his eyes but stayed silent.

"So anyway... After it was all out I was talking with Pete and he said that he didn't think you got the hint. I remember I was going to tell you... But then I couldn't-"

Alarm bells went off in Remus's head at that moment.

"Wait, wait! Peter knew that I didn't know?" Remus exclaimed incredulously.

Sirius's eyes widened, "Well, yeah, but..."

"So you've both been keeping this from me!" Remus stood up from the end of the bed, "Great, that's just brilliant! So when did I become the one who everyone lies to? Why is that even a thing?"

Sirius was a defensive person by nature, Remus knew that. There was even a specific look in his eyes when he felt threatened and intended to fight back. Yep, there it was.

"Well what about you?" Sirius, never to be outdone, jumped to his feet too, "Every second sentence you say nowadays starts with 'James told me' or 'I was speaking to James and'! And then it always finishes with something about me or Pete! I expect that kind of bitchiness from James but not you!"

Remus growled, "We wouldn't have anything to bitch about if you two didn't keep so many secrets!"

By that point, they'd reached the awkward moment of the arguement in which they'd both made their standings clear. The only thing that was left to do now was to storm out but, considering it was ten minutes until the curfew, they had, short of retreating to the bathroom, very little options. So, with one final scowl at each other, they both planted themselves on their beds and drew the curtains firmly shut. Good enough.