Chapter Three: The Pony

This time Tony was sober enough to get dressed up for his date.

He'd decided to give it another whirl, and sent Superbridge his pick-up message. He went outside, carrying his Silver Sentinel armor in case of an emergency, and a wormhole opened up in front of him. He checked the settings on his phone again; He'd made sure to specify he wanted somebody alive, somebody hot, and somebody female.

With his date assured to at least be a tolerable one, he stepped into the wormhole, and came out on the Superbridge.

"Hello, clone number 6160." Tony nodded at the Gatekeeper.

"Evening Mr. Stark." The clone nodded. "Your date for the evening is waiting in the Silver Palace, on Segment 11. If you'll move out of the way, we have a party of mutants coming in."

Tony stepped out of the rosenbridge generator, and strode towards Segment 11. Now that he was sober, he could really appreciate the magnificent designs that must have gone into building the Superbridge. He had to know who designed it. He could see things that would revolutionize his world, but most of it was so complex he couldn't make heads or tail of it.

Reed probably could, but he was only good with theory work. It would take him about a week to make something as rudimentary as a Tachion Pulse Emitter, even with his powers.

Tony shook his head at the waste of Reed Richards. Truth be told, his latest visit to Superbridge came from a case of Richards-envy. Tony had dated supermodels before. But Reed Richards was actually married to one of them. Sometimes Tony wished he could find the perfect woman. A supermodel who was interested in a family of rich super geniuses.

He reached Segment 11 soon enough, thanks to the recent discovery that the Superbridge had a monorail transport system. He intended to explore more of Superbridge when he had the time, but right now, he had another mystery date. Hopefully, this one wouldn't be a I-have-a-rusty-fork-taped-to-my-shoe date. He hated those.

Tony'd gone ahead and bought the Silver Package, not yet comfortable with getting the gold package (he didn't want people to think he was some rich slob) but he didn't want another fiasco like last time. No more bowling.

The Silver Palace looked exactly like it sounded, and Tony was surprised to see it was situated in the middle of a park. It was a good park, if you were into the Disney scene. He thought the does were an extravagant touch.

"Ah, Mr. Stark." It was the same blonde guy he'd come to associate the clones with, but wearing a nice suit instead. "Your date has already arrived and ordered."

"Great." Tony ran a hand through his hair. "What did she order?"

"The vegetarian pasta." The waiter said, handing Tony the menu.

Tony took a quick glance, assured by the waiter not correcting him when he said 'she'. "I'll have the same, but with a side order of donuts."

The waiter took the menu back and gave Tony a quick wink before leading him to his table. Tony did his best to put on his I-am-the-best-person-in-the-world-and-you'd-better-believe-it face. That face quickly dropped into a why-am-I-always-surrounded-by-craziness face when he saw who was waiting for him at the table.

There in the booth, sat a miniature horse. She deep lavender, with a similarly colored mane, and only about three feet tall. She was a unicorn, and it looked like she had a tattoo on her flank.

Tony considered bolting for the door, but when the pony looked up and waved shyly, he decided You know what? I haven't been assaulted with rusty cutlery or pet maggots yet. Let's see where this trainwreck ends up.

He sighed, and sat down as the unicorn nervously watched him. He wondered whether she could even talk.

She could.

"Hi! I'm Twilight Sparkle!"

"Tony Stark." Tony greeted her, as he checked his phone. Scrolling down the options for Superbridge, he realized that he'd missed one of the options; Human? Y/N.

"I take it you took it for granted that we'd be dating within our own species too?"

Twilight winced. "No, I saw it, I just didn't want to limit my options. You weren't expecting somebody, uh… not human?"

"I should have expected it." Tony said darkly, cursing his luck again. "I'm going to come right out and say it; this won't go anywhere. I have no interest in dating a miniature unicorn."

Twilight lowered her eyes. "Oh, okay."

"Just to be clear; you aren't going to stalk me or try to kill me for turning you down, are you?"

"No, I understand." Twilight said. "Accidents happen, and you're clearly expecting a human girl."

She sounded a little sad, but Tony was upset too. Here he was, literally crossing universes just for a date, and the people arranging this had set him up with a talking unicorn. He got up to leave.

"Could I ask you just one question before you go?" Twilight asked.

Tony hesitated. This was about the time his date would pull out something unexpected. But on the other hand… well, she didn't seem like the type to stab him with a rusty fork.

"Sure."

"Well, I was reading your Icebreakers before you got here, and I was just curious… apparently, you've invented a super-cool-one-of-a-kind-superhero-armor powered by an ARC reactor, and I was wondering how you managed to compensate for the hydrogen sink and route the power through a complex system?"

You could have knocked Tony over with a butterfly.


Dalek Sec watched and analyzed as Luna preformed a levitation charm on her plate. Soon he would master this thing called magic, and all of mankind would feel the wrath of the Daleks!

She put down her plate. "How was that?" She asked.

"YOUR MAGIC STUBBORNLY REFUSES TO BE ANALYSED." Dalek Sec growled.

"Yes, well, it is magic." Luna smiled. "You mustn't beat yourself up over it Dally."

"MAGIC IS ILLOGICAL! EVERYTHING MUST HAVE A BASIS IN RATIONALITY!"

"I know a boy named Harry-James-Potter-Evans-Verres, though we just call him Harry Potter." Luna said. "He says that trying to understand magic at its deepest, as a science, would take a lifetime."

"BECAUSE HE IS NOT A DALEK!" Dalek Sec roared.

Luna tilted her head and smiled at him. Dalek Sec found the smile infuriating. "YOU FIND SOMETHING AMUSING!"

She tilted her head the other way. "Do you remember how a couple of days ago, you said you didn't understand the concept of caring?"

"AND I STILL DO NOT!" Sec said. "CARING FOR SOMETHING MAKES YOU WEAK! AS A DALEK, I AM STRONG!"

She shook her head. "You're doing it again."

"DOING WHAT!"

"You're caring you silly Dalek."

Dalek Sec felt his rage boil. Were it not for the secrecy of his mission, he would exterminate her, here and now. "HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF CARING!"

"Think about it." Luna still smiled. "According to you, Daleks only know three emotions; anger, and fear. And probably a whole bunch of emotions between those two like hatred and disgust, right?"

Dalek Sec was surprised by Luna's candidness. "THIS IS TRUE!"

"Now, I don't really know much about fear." Luna admitted. "I don't think I've ever been scared before. But I was angry once. You see, I really wanted my dad to go on a picnic with me. Only, he was a bit busy getting a story done on the Rotfang conspiracy."

"EXPLAIN!"

"Oh, vampires infiltrating dentistry."

"AH. YOU MEAN THE CARVENIAN INVASION."

"They're aliens?" Luna asked. "I thought there was something odd about them. You're going to have to tell me about that later. But the point is, I got really angry that he wouldn't spend any time with me, so I threw a tantrum and accidentally trapped myself on the ceiling."

"The point is, if I didn't care about my dad so much, I never would've gotten angry. So if you Daleks get angry so often… well, then I think you must care about something."

That got Dalek Sec thinking. The Daleks had always found the concept of caring to be the most disgusting human trait imaginable. When the Cult of Skaaro was tasked with understanding humankind to better destroy them, it was clear that they were only going to try to understand mankind's strong points, not 'caring'.

But… he found himself struggling. Daleks absolutely did not care. However, Luna's logic was undeniably sound. So Either Daleks did not care, or…

There was no or. Dalek Sec could either accept that Luna was right, or exterminate her like a Dalek should have done a long time ago…

But was he a Dalek, or a scientist?

"What are you thinking?" Luna asked.

"…I AM PONDERING WHETHER I CAN IGNORE SOMETHING DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF ME!" Dalek Sec snapped.

Luna let him alone to his thoughts for awhile. Then he stirred. "I HAVE DECIDED THAT DALEKS DO CARE! WE CARE ABOUT DALEK PRIDE! WE CARE ABOUT OUR MISSION! AND I CARE ABOUT SCIENCE! AND IF ONE FOLLOWS THIS LOGIC, IF ONE BELIEVES THAT CARING IS THE ESSENTIAL DRIVING FORCE OF RAGE, IF ONE BELIEVES THAT CARING IS AN ESSENTIAL PART OF LIVING, THEN THE CRUCIAL ASPECT OF HUMANITY THAT THE DALEKS HAVE BEEN SEARCHING FOR, IS THE ONE THAT WE HAVE IGNORED OR DISSMISSED AS WEAKNESS! WE HAVE IGNORED THE ANSWER IN FRONT OF OUR FACES! WE HAVE BEEN ILLOGICAL!"

Dalek Sec did not feel sorry at his stupidity. That was not the Dalek way. He felt rage. He could have shot something in his rage. But Luna reached over, and laid a gentle hand on his dome. "I know it's difficult to realize you're wrong about something." Luna said. "My friend Hermione doesn't even think Nargles exist because it's not in a book."

"THAT IS FLAWED THINKING. THINGS MUST BE LEARNED THROUGH EXPLORATION AND SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY, NOT THROUGH WHAT OTHERS SAY. ARE YOU SUGGESTING…" Dalek Sec's eye stalk swiveled towards Luna. "… THAT I HAVE SUCH A FLAW MYSELF! TO BE FLAWED WOULD BE INESCUSABLE FOR A DALEK! I WOULD RATHER SELF-EXTERMINATE THAN BE FLAWED!"

"Oh, no!" Luna said. "I don't think you're flawed. Or maybe you're anti-flawed? You're mission is to study humans right? That means that the Daleks as a whole must have realized that, well… they were... I wonder what word you would use... insufficient."

"HOW DARE YOU!"

"Well, why else would they need to figure out how to get better if they think they're already perfect?" Luna asked. "I think the Daleks must be smarter than most wizards. Cornelius Fudge didn't even think of putting together a team to figure out how to make better spells. Voldemort just blamed people being less magic on the muggles and started killing them. I think you Daleks have the right idea, if you can admit that you need to be better."

Dalek Sec preened at the compliment. He was smart enough to know she was simply saying to to cheer him up, but the words had some truth to it, and he grasped onto that truth firmly. "YOU ARE RIGHT OF COURSE! DALEKS ARE SUPREME, NOT ONLY BECAUSE WE HAVE THE GREATER FORM, BUT BECAUSE WE CONTINUALLY IMPROVE ON THAT FORM!"

Luna's smile lit up even more as her plate was removed from in front of her, and some Yorkshire pudding replaced it. "Did you order any desert Dally?"

Dalek Sec decided to neglect the fact that a Dalek's sole nourishment, fresh still-beating hearts and depleted uranium, were not on the menu.


Despite his initial trepidation, Tony Stark found Twilight to be good company. The unicorn was apparently her world's equivalent of a genius, and a hero. They talked about inventions, Tony bringing up some of his designs on his phone where Twilight would make helpful suggestions, and she would write out magical equations on her napkins where Tony would correct the math a little.

And then they got into a discussion about gods of mischief, mainly about how much they sucked.

"I wish Loki made it rain chocolate." Tony sighed. "I mean, you know, Thor controls the weather so maybe he couldn't, but it would be nice not having to fight an army whenever he throws a tantrum."

"I would love it if Discord was, I dunno, Pinkie Pie's younger brother. Then when we hit him with the Elements Of Harmony, it could find some good in him and redeem him instead of turning him into a statue for the next wielders of harmony to trap."

"Why is it that every single pantheon has a god of mischief anyway?" Tony asked. "Hermes, Anansi, Sun Wukong…"

"I don't know who any of those are, but I don't want to find out." Twilight said.

"Amen to that. Why is it us mortals catch on, but their pantheons are all; nope, I like having this god of mischief fellow around, even if they almost destroy us." Tony lifted his glass (filled with what-was-most-definitely-not-a-refreshing-alcoholic-beverage). "To gods of mischief. May their arrogant smiles grow so wide their heads fall off."

"Discord may have already done that." Twilight said.

Tony tried again. "May they live to a ripe old age so they get senile and have to spend their days harmless in a nursing home."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure both Loki and Discord are several thousand years old already, and neither are senile…"

Tony sighed. "May they always have heroes like us standing in their way."

"I'll toast to that." Twilight raised her own glass and chinked it against Tony's. But before she could take a drink, her glass shattered as a high pitched squeal rent the air.

"A UNICORN!"

Twilight was too dazed to run, stunned by being able to hear the three exclamation marks being screamed, when an adorable little girl, no more than three years old with the cutest ponytail imaginable crawled up onto the seat next to Twilight and hugged her.

"… Uh, thank you sweetie." Twilight said, recovering enough to try and gently pry the giggling little girl off. "Yup, I'm a unicorn. Maybe you could uh… let the unicorn breath? … Getting kind of tight there sweetie… Tony, do you have a crowbar in that briefcase?"

Tony, for his part, couldn't help but laugh. "Does this kid belong to anybody?" He asked the room.

"Agnes!" A pair of girls ran up to their booth. "I'm so sorry sir, miss, she gets excited about unicorns."

"You don't say." Twilight managed to choke out.

"Agnes, let go of the nice unicorn lady."

"Wat iz all of diz?"

A large bald man dressed in black with a hooked nose and a grey striped scarf walked over to the booth. "Gurlz, vhat are you doiiiing!" The last word was stretched out in shock as he saw who was inside the booth. "Oh. It'z a unicorn."

"Daddy!" Agnes cried, releasing her chokehold on Twilight. "I found one! I found a unicorn!"

"Yez, yez you did." The man said. "Eh, zorry for de troubles, mizz…"

"Twilight Sparkle." Twilight said, rubbing her neck. "Don't worry about it, this actually happens quite a lot when I meet human fillies."

"I am Gru." The man bowed. "I don't normally bring my daughters to Superbridge, but de voman I vas dating zeemed nice, zo I vanted her to meet my kittens."

"Daddy, can the unicorn be our new mommy?" Agnes asked, her volume decreased to an adorably expectant whisper and her eyes as wide as saucers.

Tony, Twilight, and the other two kids sent their own wide-eyed looks at Gru, but they were more of the shocked and panicked variety then the cute variety.

Gru's own eyes were of the panicked variety. "I do not tink dat vould be a good idea." He said. "I mean, she already haz a date…" Tony's eyes widened in protest, but Twilight gestured for him to stay quiet.

Agnes took a deep breath and shut he mouth firmly. "Oh no kitten, diz iz like dat time vhen you vanted to grow a mustache. It cannot be done!"

Agnes kept her breath firmly in.

"Agnes." Margo joined in. "I think this is a code dad's-not-going-to-give-in-just-because-you-stop-breathing-for-a-while."

"You know…" Tony said. "The whole point of a code is…"

"Hey." Twilight said, as she got an idea. "Agnes, do you want a mustache?"

Agnes spun around, her eyes filled with the magical light they only had when she was thinking of unicorns (which was always).

"I can give you a mustache if you like, but only if you're a good little filly and listen to your dad."

Agnes rounded on her dad and released a deep breath. "?" She collapsed backwards onto her seat, winded.

Gru looked at Twilight in concern, only for her to mouth 'it's temporary'. "Alright Agnes. One muztache, und den ve go."

Agnes got up unsteadily as Twilight cast the spell. She reached up to her face, and her eyes lit up the way they always did when she thought about mustaches (which was always). He face was almost buried behind the thick curly wax 'stache.

"Yay for mustache!" Agnes cried.

"And now, ve go." He bowed to Twilight. "Tank you for giving my leetle gurl a muztache." He said, his lips curling as he said words in an order he'd never thought he would ever put them.

"It was no problem." Twilight said, clearly amused by both the girls and their dad.

The four of them walked away from the table, little mustachio'd Agnes singing; "Unicorns I love them, unicorns I do. Unicorns I love them, unicorns I do. Uni-uni-unicorns! I lo-ove them."

Edith snuck behind the group and ran back to Twilight. "Um, miss Twilight? Can I…?" She pointed to her face. Twilight smiled and her horn lit up with magic. A large yellow mustache filled Edith's face. "You're the most awesomest unicorn ever." Edith whispered gratefully, before running back to her family.

"Well that was fun." Tony said. "How long do those mustaches last?"

"About a day or so if I don't cancel the spell." Twilight said. "I just love little foals."

Tony chuckled. "You meet some interesting people here." He said. "I mean, I've met a corpse, a pirate, and now a magical unicorn pony." Tony looked around at the crowd around him. "I even saw some sort of mutant crocodile once…" His voice trailed off as he saw a familiar sight.

There, sitting at a table across for him, was an easily recognizable sight. A monster straight out of a Disney movie. He was twice as tall as a normal man, covered with fur, jagged teeth filled his mouth and twisted horns adorned his head, he wore no shirt to cover his impressive physique, only a pair of tattered pants that ended were his feet became curved and animal, and a billowing purple cape.

Across from him, there was a girl with a very familiar hairstyle; it was arrange on either side of her head like a cinnamon bun. She wore an elegant white gown, and her expression was a strange mixture of kindness and sadness.

"Tony?" Twilight looked around. "What is it?"

"That's the Beast from Disney's Beauty and the Beast." Tony said. "And that… is Princess Leah from Star Wars."

"Oh yeah." Tony was shocked that Twilight agreed like it was no big thing. "I recognize him. Rarity's favorite movie is Beauty and the Beast. I haven't seen star Wars though."

"And you're okay with that!" Tony asked. "What is a fictional character doing here!"

"Ahem." It wasn't loud but Tony heard it. Looking around, he saw The Beast glaring at him. Tony quickly raised his hands in apology, and the Beast turned back to his date, looking disgruntled.

"Oh, you mean you don't know?" Twilight asked.

"About what?" Tony asked.

"That we're all fictional characters."

Tony almost fainted. "I… feel pretty real."

"Well of course." Twilight nodded. "When I asked Mr. Freddie… he's a permanent resident of Superbridge, he's been teaching me some magic… he said that it's like monkeys writing on a typewriter."

"… say that again?" Tony asked.

"Okay, so there's this theory that if you give a monkey a typewriter, she'll start pressing buttons randomly and churn out gibberish. But, if she hits random buttons enough, eventually she'll randomly turn out the works of shakespear."

"Apparantly, it's like that for the multiverse. Every great story ever written, all those characters, they're out there somewhere in the multiverse, and either great minds think alike and somebody just thought of a world exactly like the one they're living in, or the psychic emanations of one section of a multiverse have spread to another, and somebody just caught the emanations and had to write a story about it. Does that make sense?"

Tony blinked. "I… suppose." He said. "But… but that means that all of fiction is a reality somewhere?"

"Yep."

"Even Call Of Clthulthu?"

"Weeeelll… Superbridge tries to investigate dimensions before setting up portals to them, so they're usually safe. But there are still incidents. I remember Rainbow Dash's first trip to Superbridge, she had to call me and my friends and six other versions of us to deal with some sort of eldritch abomination named Missingno."

Tony was shaking. "So this is why Dr. Strange told me not to keep coming to Superbridge." Tony muttered.

"Hey." Twilight's eyes lit up. "Fluttershy and Rarity needed some encouragement after realizing they were being watched by trillions too. Segment 3 is nothing but movie theatres. Why don't we head down there and catch a show?"


There was popcorn, and for this Tony was glad, because apparently his movie was something of a blockbuster. There were several Iron-Man movies, but the clone attending to the theatre picked out the one for his dimension and he settled down, nervously munching.

This movie was shown to people in several dimensions. Would it be propaganda, showing only the finest moments of his life? Would it show the good along with the bad? Would it be… dare he think it… an adult film? His life certainly felt like an adult film, with woman after supermodel woman after inhumanely hot woman.

Whatever he was expecting, it wasn't what he got. He thought it would be a documentary; this was his life after all, and he'd done a whole lot. But it was a blockbuster. He didn't expect the rock music that was sorely lacking in reality (note to self; have AC/DC write actual background music for my life) and it was shown through a camera, not through his own eyes.

His movie opened up with one of the memories in his life that was burned into him; the closest he'd come to death, while he was still defenseless without his lovely power armor. He was chatting jovially with some soldiers and then sharing a chest-full of shrapnel with them. It was his life, he knew it was coming the moment the scene started. He just didn't expect needing a drink within the first five minutes of the movie.

Twilight's eyes were wide. "Is that… did you die?"

"What do you think?" Tony asked.

"Okay so… how did you survive?"

"You'll find out." Tony said. "Oh look, this is when I… uh… I didn't know I won a peace prize."


Tony moved quickly to cover Twilight's eyes as the scene quickly shifted from him arguing to that reporter, what's-her-face, into him being in bed with her. "Ah, this bit isn't for kids."

"I'm not some filly." Twilight said, though she let him cover her eyes.

"How old are you?"

"That's none of your business."


"So you're seriously not upset with this?"

"It's obvious that your culture has different values then mine. It's actually quite fascinating. At first I thought your stewardess dancing was just normal entertainment. I could see my friend Rarity doing that, with better dresses of course. And as for the killing, I'd never do it myself, but I'm sure you have your reasons. You probably can't just banish people to the moon or turn them to stone in your world, can you?"

"... Well, I know one dimension I'm not going to break any laws in."


"Man, when you watch things like Stane meeting with the bad guys it seems so obvious that he is one."

"Did he just steal your heart? He did! He just stole your heart!"

"I hope I make it out of there alive…"

"..."

"...Okay, so yes, I do make it out of there alive."

"…"

"The tension got to me for a moment… and the suspense… let's just keep watching. There's a fight scene coming up."


After they finished watching Iron Man, they asked for Iron Man 2 to be put in. "Wow."

"I know right."

"I mean, if you were in my world, you'd probably be a bad guy. No offense."

"None taken."

"But compared to Justin Hammer, I can see why people call you a hero. He's worse than Trixie!"

"Yeah, he's worse then pretty much anybody."


"That was an impressive energy burst. Did you use the same energy that you powered your armor with, or did you use separate caches of energy, and power those streams of energy with your suit?"

"The latter. I decided it would be more efficient to coil a solar cyclotron into streams then to shuffle in the Arc reactor composites into positron flows."

"But then you probably designed this model to work off a palladium core, right? So in the newer one, the arc reactor wouldn't have had to deal with positrons…"

"… But neutrons." Tony slapped himself on the head. "You know, Reed Richards tried to tell me the same thing, but all I heard was blah, blah, blah, blah, blah…"


"So… you and Pepper?"

"Ah, that."

"What happened? Why are you on Superbridge if you're with her?"

"Well you see, in real life there's no romantic music. There's no, 'oh it's obvious you're the star of the story and you should be with the main girl'. The fact is, Pepper… I mean…" He sighed. "It didn't work out between us. I don't want to talk about it any more. Let's watch some of my freind's movies."


"Did Captain America just disobey his boss? I mean, he just told the Captain not to go into the Nazi place, and he goes into the Nazi place anyway! That's insane! What if he got exiled? Or thrown in prison? Or thrown in prison in that place that he got exiled to?"

Tony hid his laugh behind his hand. It was cute that she was worried more about Phillips then the Nazis. "Yeah, Captain America's awesome that way."


"Oh poor Loki… I mean, if I suddenly found out I was a griffon I would be upset too, but to have all of his friends turn on him in his time of need…"

"I didn't know any of this. When I met Loki he was too busy leading an army on Manhattan to tell me his backstory."

"If only he'd told his friends how he was feeling, they could have stopped him. Hey! Maybe you should bring a copy of this movie back to your dimension and give it to everyone so they'll be more understanding. If he had friends, he'd probably stop trying to destroy planets."

Tony imagined a world where everybody saw Loki as a sympathetic character, somebody who could just change with a lot of love.

Everybody flee in terror, as I rain destruction upon you! Wait, why are there girls wearing T-shirts with my face on them? Why are they all running towards me shrieking instead of away from me shrieking? No! Help me! Curse you Tony Stark!

"That is a great idea."


Twilight was hiding under her chair. "The Abomination is the worst. He's like Trixie, Discord, and the Red Skull all wrapped up in one."

"Hey, if you don't like it, we can stop watching." Tony said.

Twilight perked up. "Would you like to watch my t.v. show?"

"You have a t.v. show? Why does Iron Man only have a couple of movies in a franchise, but you have a whole t.v. show?"

"I know. From what I hear, My Little Pony; Friendship Is Magic is really popular on a lot of worlds."

"Wait… My Little Pony?"

"Have you heard of it?"

Tony Stark felt a deep sinking sensation in his stomach, at the thought of watching the girliest thing alive since Barbie. "Um… maybe."


"Rainbow Dash said this next bit is 'awesome icing on the awesome cake'."

"Oh come on, you guys haven't fought Nightmare Moon directly during the whole two episodes. When he actually did find monsters, all you did was laugh at them, or make friends with them, or…"

He watched in muted awe as the Elements of Harmony were revealed, and the six little ponies began to float in mid-air, radiating power, staring at Nightmare Moon much like the Abomination stared at the Hulk – like she was going down, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

"Oh… my…"

A rainbow light filled the screen, and Tony decided to give this show a little benefit of the doubt.


*I Am Iron Man, Badubadubadudum, badu –*

Tony answered his phone. "Hey Pepper."

"Tony where are you? You said you'd be home by now…"

"Can't talk now Pepper, Rainbow Dash just kicked a dragon in the face!"

"Wha –"


"You have got to bring me some of that Poison Joke Twilight."

"Sure."

"Oh, I can just see it now; mini Captain America sitting on Thor's shoulder as Thor tries to hit me with a floppy polka-dot hammer. Black Widow with her tongue flopping all over the place, Bruce Banner with a deep voice, Hawkeye walking into walls…"

"I'll bring you some of the antidote too."

"… right."


"No way."

"Just watch."

"There is no way a sonic boom can make rainbow patterns in the sky."

"Just watch."

"I will watch. I've set my Iron-Man mask to analyze how she flies. Assuming that all realities are fundementally similar, then a Sonic Rainboom should be possible in our dimension. And since my armor is the fastest thing in my world, I think I would have noticed if I was leaving a rainbow trail. Unless she's faster than my armor, or the atmosphere in your world is..."

Sonic RainBOOM!

"…"

"She did it."

"Son of a…"


*I Am Iron Man, Badubadubadudum, badu –*

Tony answered his phone. "Hey Sanji."

"Hey Tony! I'm just trying out this awesome 'phone' thing…"

"Can't talk now Sanji, Fluttershy is in a staring contest with a cockatrice!"

"Wha –"


"Why hasn't Rarity punched Blueblood in the face yet?"

"We don't have fists."

"She should totally buck him in the face. Or mess with him like she messed with those Diamond Dogs. I'd totally play mind games on him if I were her."


Twilight was adamant that they not watch the episodes after Discord, but Tony was fine with ending it on a high note. He had to get back to his own dimension anyway.

"I've got to analyze that data from Rainbow Dash." Iron Man said. "Assuming that all dimensions are real, then it's possibly to make a sonic rainboom just by going fast enough. I've got to try that."

"Hey, Rainbow Dash is in a race next week." Twilight said. "She got into an argument over wether she was faster then this other-dimensional hedgehog."

"Was his name… sonic?"

"Yes, it was. I'll be there if you want to hang out again, you can meet my friends and see if your armor can match Rainbow Dash."

"Oh we'll see. Tell her to bring her A-game." Tony said.

"I'll have to go now." Twilight said. "I think I'll write about you to Princess Celestia."

"Really? I hope you don't write the bad stuff."

"It'll say; Dear Princess Celestia. Today I made a new and unlikely friend. He's from a different world, so he has much different standards then us, but I learned that cultural differences are just that; differences in culture. They shouldn't impact friendship. If somebody acts strange because that's how they've grown up acting, you should accept them for who they are regardless."

Tony couldn't help but smile. Looking back at Glinda's episode, he had to admit he was worried that she wouldn't tolerate him because he was an even bigger jerk then her. And then he'd be without any intelligent conversation. "Well, you'd best not keep the Princess waiting. She might exile you, or send you to prison, or send you to a prison she exiled you to."

She laughed, but her eyes were more than a little worried. "See you later Tony." She galloped off.

"I was just joking." He shrugged.

He began making his way to his own dimension, when something darted into his path. "Tony!"

"Sanji?" The two of them stared at each other for a second.

"I was worried about you when you talked about the cockatrice and then hung up."

Tony smiled. "Oh, sorry, false alarm. I was just watching the coolest t.v. show. Did you know about these movie theatres?"

"Yeah I knew. You look like you had a good time."

"Oh, I did. I just made a new friend, Twilight Sparkle."

"Is she cute?" Sanji asked with hearts suddenly in his eyes.

"No, she's a pony."

Sanji's face returned to normal. "… I wouldn't have expected that of you Tony."

"No! No!" Tony scoffed. "It wasn't a date!"

"Did you tell her that?"

Tony shook his head. "No, it really wasn't a date, we were just good friends!" Sanji kept staring at him. "She's a unicorn from the land of Equstria…" Sanji raised an eyebrow. "… and she's a genius so we shared our ideas and promised to meet again…" Sanji sighed, and hid his face in a hand. "Look, it wasn't a date alright?"

"Tony." He said with a muffled voice behind his hand. "As a friend, I am worried about you feelings for this pony…"

"I am not in love with a unicorn Sanji!"

"I never said you were."

Tony fumed. "good, because I'm not." And he wasn't, no matter what anybody said.

"Okay." Sanji shrugged, but still looked at him funny.

Tony sighed. "I think I really need a drink."

As the two of them left, a dark figure emerged from the shadows behind the theatre. He stroked his broad chin as he observed them leave. "Love with a unicorn? Giggity giggity giggity." He disappeared back into the shadows, to reappear at a more dramatic time.


A/N: Sorry about the lateness in this update, this chapter took longer than I expected to finish.

Twilight Sparkle and freinds are from My Little Pony; Freindship Is Magic, but you probably knew that. I think the others were mentioned. Leah's from Star Wars, Beast is from Beauty And The Beast, Gru and his family are from Despicable Me, etc. Oh, and Missingno is from Atop The Fourth Wall. And the mysterious guy shall remain mysterious until a later chapter, or unless you recognize his catchphrase.

And no, Tony Stark will not fall in love with Twilight. In case it's not clear by now, he will strike out with each of the dates Superbridge sets up for him. And if I'm doing my job right, he'll strike out hilariously.